NOTE: Guesses in italics are only guesses;
guesses in RED are a link to the solution or substantial clues.

1. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#1**
This married foreign born A- list model/part-time actress/full time nudist is yachting. I have no idea if it is with the knowledge of her husband or not. Emily Ratajkowski/Sebastian Bear-McClard

2. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#2**
This foreign born female A+ list rapper always has at least one female employee to hook up with producers/possible feature performers so that our rapper doesn't have to do so any longer. Nicki Minaj

3. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#3**
Prisoner Of Hollywood - A Dancing Boy Blind: This is a hard one, but since I get all confessional early in the morning, here goes: How do things work, to parrot a phrase from a certain late online publication known for stepping on toes? I'll tell you. Yes, there really is a French billionaire patron (mentioned in "the long shadow of abuse" blind). He's the founder and chief an SF VC firm - the one with the upright five-pointed symbol in its name. They're the owner of my former employer, where as a young adult I was abused and exploited, then fired for reporting it. They're a streaming media co - no not Amazon or Netflix - but that's what they want: the consumer. And that's what I'll bring to them, along with the people I know and will meet in the business - content. (There's also a glam brand, for micro-budget filmmaking gear, which is closer to what they do: hardware and software.) Here's the other part. There's been an overture - through my new agent (as to the old one: ba ha ha!) - from someone in my past, someone I never expected to hear from again. Was it an apology? Nope: a proposal. It seems he's become aware that my star may be rising again (I guess he reads CDAN). How he knows the other side I have no idea, but the truth is I've not been doing well. Yes, I've relapsed, and every day is a struggle. And he knows family are no help. His idea? He'll not just become my mentor again, but adopt me as his son. That way he'll be able to get legal guardianship of me (in the medical and financial sense - heading back to the psych ward, I guess), and no doubt, re-enact what happened in the past (what is he going to do, dress me like a little boy? probably!). (The fact that he's also a wicked talent - hard, but honest and fair in his artistic and professional guidance - just makes it all the more demented. I'm sure he knows too that it leaves me free to marry someone my own age. This would, of course, all be a matter of public record, at least.) Why would I even consider that? Just know that if I do, it may be a choice between that and eeking out a marginal existence for probably the rest of my life. (If I ever write a memoir, it will be called "Prisoner of Hollywood.") It may be the case that the only good I can do in the world, beside, hopefully, using my talents, is to stop this from being passed down again - lift people up, in other words, and ask and expect nothing in return. I am, maybe, already lost. PS I want to add that my patron didn't know what he was buying - what they'd been up to, I mean (the previous owners, in Chicago, didn't tell him) - and has gone further than I even thought possible to reform the company. (In the end I'm just some actor and writer. He's a genius - one of the good elites.)

4. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#4**
This loud and fast rocker who’s many decade career has been primarily as a solo artist is a polarizing figure due to his outspoken political opinions and the fact he had numerous attachments to underage girls in the 70’s and 80’s. The underage story is worse than anyone imagined. In the late 70’s, The rocker discovered he was broke due to bad investments by his management. To make extra money, he trafficked and pimped underage girls using his concerts and tours as a front. This went on for at least 6 or 7 years. Ted Nugent

5. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#5**
Sex traffickers are now posing as women on popular websites for women to try and get them to attend parties in their local area. If the women show an interest, they are then probed whether they would be interested in meeting wealthy men to date. This then gets boiled down to just hooking up with men for money.

6. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#6**
Reader Blind Item: A tale of two actors with the same interests and problems but with different ways of handling them. Actor #1, who is deceased, is very well known from two TV shows he starred in. The first was a sitcom based on a movie and a play and featured him paired up with an actor meant to represent his exact opposite. The second was a crime drama with a medical theme. In between the two shows, his gambling, primarily on horse racing, as well as a divorce found him in debt to the wrong people who threatened him with physical harm unless they were paid. He went to the police who in turn put him touch with the feds. He wore a wire and the people he owed money to, who were already under investigation, went to jail. Jack Klugman ("The Odd Couple" and "Quincy M.E.")

Actor #2, who is still alive, is even more famous than Actor #1. In fact, he is part of popular culture. A TV show he starred in was not that successful while running the first time but became huge in syndication leading to movies and other versions of the show set in different time frames with different casts. He was also in a popular crime drama that ran for several seasons. Like Actor #1, he liked to play the horses and also had divorces and went into debt to the wrong people. Unlike Actor #1, he tried to resolve the problem himself. They bled him dry until they were put away on unrelated charges. There are allegations the people he owed money to had something to do with the mysterious death of a family member. William Shatner ("Star Trek", "T. J. Hooker" and "Boston Legal") (wife Nerine Shatner, found dead in their pool)

7. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#7**
This celebrity CEO is trying to convince a foreign born billionaire/CEO of a huge conglomerate who all of you know to try and vouch for him and his company with banks. The celebrity CEO has to be careful how he talks about it though because the foreign born billionaire is a huge investor in the company of the celebrity CEO. Elon Musk/Francois-Henri Pinault (attended wedding of Elon’s brother Kimbal Musk and Christiana Wyly)

8. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#8**
Here is a pro tip for this C-/D+ list celebrity all of you know but through someone rather than her own name. She blew it two months ago with someone super rich who was really into her because she pulled out a meth pipe. Apparently she did the same thing again this past weekend with another high end individual. When you either are high end yachting or trying to get with a guy who would have his entire world come crashing down if he is associated with meth, you need to decide just how important it is for you. Melissa Meeks (ex-wife of Jeremy "Hot Felon" Meeks)/Donald 'DJ' Friese (divorce party)

9. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#9**
Reader Blind Item: Police are considering whether or not to reopen the investigation into the death of this actor a couple decades ago. At the time of his death, he was being investigated himself in his girlfriend’s suicide and whether or not it was actually a suicide. This actor was not a big star but had a recurring role in a popular sitcom and supporting roles in films. He also had a serious substance abuse problem. A jailhouse informant has given information that both the actor and his girlfriend might have been offed by organized crime due to both debts run up by the actor and the fear he may turn himself into the cops and give evidence in exchange for immunity as a way of escaping the debts. Robert Pastorelli ("Murphy Brown")/Charemon Jonovich

10. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#10**
Why yes, one of the barely legal members of this up and coming family group is hooking up with the much older A+ list singer/writer which is how the group is up and coming rather than being a group with no chance. The thing is, the barely legal member thinks it is love rather than what it is which is meaningless sex with a good chance of her getting passed to a record producer. Chloe x Halle (Chloe Bailey)

11. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#11**
Old Hollywood - Reader Blind Item: This beloved comedic actor known for his high level of energy despite his weight was primarily successful in the films of a specific director and also in films with a specific actor who was a friend of his in real life. He was married to the same woman his whole adult life and had a family including a son who is an actor. However, he also enjoyed sexual relationships with men. His modus operandi was to hire workers for his estate either in gardening or doing renovations and then offer them money for sex.
Actor: Dom DeLuise
Director: Mel Brooks
Specific actor: Burt Reynolds
Son(s): Michael, Peter and David

12. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#12**
Old Hollywood - Kindness - Reader Blind Item: This actor was in both films and TV. In film, his two best known film roles, one comedic and one serious, were in later films. On TV, he was in several series. His two most famous was the short-lived horror series and two TV movies that featured the same character and a role in a sitcom for which he won a very prestigious award for. He had a hard childhood and was in an orphanage for a part of it. As an adult, he did a lot for orphans including employing them on film sets and providing catered meals to the orphanages themselves. There are a lot of stories of individual acts of kindness performed by this actor and his third wife who was also an actress.

Actor: Darren McGavin
Comedic film role: "A Christmas Story"
Serious film role: "The Natural"

TV horror series/TV movies: "Kolchak: The Night Stalker"/"The Night Stalker"/"The Night Strangler"
TV series: "Mike Hammer"
Prestigious award: Nominated for 1990 Emmy Award as an Outstanding Guest Star in a Comedy Series on Murphy Brown

Wife: Kathie Browne

13. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#13**
This actress was A/A- list until she made a horrible decision in accepting a role. She thought it would win her an Oscar. That is never the way those roles turn out. Ever. Her career has been in the crapper ever since. Now, she has been given a second chance and is doing what she did back in the day which is cheating on a significant other with a co-star. This time though, the difference is she is married rather than just dating someone. Amanda Seyfried ("Lovelace") ("The Art of Racing in the Rain"/Milo Ventimiglia

14. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#14**
A minority owner (but a very large minority) of a major professional sport through a shell company is the largest owner of a soon to open sports gambling operation. The spouse of the owner made some news of her own within the past several months. Derek Jeter (Hannah)

15. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/01 **#15**
Continuing her trend towards mean, this A- list mostly television actress from a very hit network show actually used the phrase, "chop chop," when a bellman did not move at a pace to her liking when attending to her luggage. She didn't tip either with her six pieces of baggage. Chrissy Metz ("This Is Us")

16. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#1**
This B+ list reality star who has one season of reality television under her belt on a certain southern show says she has hooked up with three cast members. One you know about. Another is kind of a shocker, and a third didn't really finish because he has a lot of performance issues.
Show: "Southern Charm"
Reality star: Ashley Jacobs
Castmates: Thomas Ravenel (shocker: Shep Rose) (performance issues: Craig Conover)

17. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#2**
This foreign born A- list mostly movie actor is getting up there in age. He also is an Academy Award winner/nominee and a reputation for trying to make sex scenes as realistic as possible whether or not his actress co-star agrees. Russell Crowe

18. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#3**
This foreign born A- list mostly television actor from a very hit streaming show seems to be like his character on the show and is a real a-hole. He goes to massage places here in LA and forces the women to have sex with them. If they don't he threatens to call to get them deported. Joseph Fiennes ("The Handmaid's Tale")

19. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#4**
Reader Blind Item: In the mid 1970’s, there was a public altercation between two men witnessed by a number of people. One of the men was a Hollywood mogul all of you know. The other was a singer/songwriter whose greatest success came as part of a band in the 1960’s who were one of the biggest American groups of the day. His solo career was not commercially successful although it was critically acclaimed and his music is well thought of by other musicians. He has had a career resurgence of sorts since his death particularly among indie rockers and there has been a documentary as well as several books about him. Part of the problem was mismanagement and incompetent marketing of his music and career and part of the problem was the singer/songwriter’s drug problems. The altercation was supposedly about his latest album and problems with its release and being over budget as the mogul ran the label the singer/songwriter recorded for. In retrospect, many consider this record the singer/songwriter’s finest achievement and a masterpiece. This is only partly true. The singer/songwriter was also angry about the mogul’s interest in his young son asking him if he would be interested in child acting etc. The singer/songwriter had heard the stories which existed even then and he ended up both yelling at and slapping around the mogul. He changed labels right after that. Gene Clark (son Kai)/David Geffen

20. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#5**
This national news host who makes news almost as much as appearing on it has an interesting past. There was of course the way she supported herself through school and how later in life those same men assisted her when she needed work or a tip for a breaking story. There were the sex clubs she belonged to with her former significant other. There are the stories she is compiling now for what she says will be a very high profile tell all she wants to complete within the next few years after the current chapter in her life plays out. My guess is it will come out just prior to the 2020 elections. Kimberly Guilfoyle (former significant other: Gavin Newsom) (current significant other: Donald Trump Jr.)

21. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#6**
Someone who will probably run for President in 2020, or at least test the waters would probably have a much better chance of success if they were able to talk about their James/Jane Bond like military record. Apparently what seems like a boring ho hum military job was actually something you could write movies and spy novels about, but that no one is allowed to discuss. Tulsi Gabbard; Tammy Duckworth; Kristin Beck

22. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#7**
This recent former candidate for President has been in the background saying he wants to run again. Some of the people in power want to make sure that doesn't happen again and have been reminding people about the lifestyle he used to live back in the day and cost him big time before. He tried to change that narrative with some personal moves shortly thereafter, but he is being subtly warned it will all come out again for a new generation to hear if he proceeds.

23. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#8**
A Birdie Blind Item: You can imagine what the tour bus would hide in the secret compartments: You'll know him as the bassist of a permanent A list band. But being a good libertarian from an early age, he always had this other hustle - the same one, in fact, as the legendary franchise character (whose own movie recently flopped). Back in grade school, it was any kind of contraband: micronauts, 8 tracks, gum. Nowadays, it's something else: a product that's only recently been relegated to black market status in the city that made him famous.
Bassist: Krist Novoselic ("Nirvana")
Franchise character: Han Solo AND Superfly
Activity: smuggling (Solo) plastic straws into Seattle so people can snort cocaine (Superfly)

24. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#9**
Reader Blind Item: This 1950’s rocker whose career was almost completely derailed by scandal early on has been accused in print of murdering one of his wives. The truth is he actually killed two of his wives but the authorities in the rural area he lives in are too in his pocket to do anything. Jerry Lee Lewis (fourth marriage, to Jaren Elizabeth Gunn Pate drowned in a swimming pool at the home of a friend with whom she was staying) (fifth marriage, to Shawn Stephens died of an overdose)

25. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#10**
Reader Blind Item: A tale of three deceased writers. The first is not really a blind item as it received full coverage by the media. This writer wrote on a particular time in American history and the migratory experience of the Americans in her day. Her books have been used in schools and inspired a very popular TV show that had several spin-offs. Her name was recently removed from an award due to her depiction, which was in keeping with the times in which she lived, of certain ethnic groups.
Laura Ingalls Wilder ("Little House on the Prairie") (The Association of Library Services for Children removed her name from award for racial insensitivity)

The second writer has had his name recently removed from a room within a public library in the Northeastern city he was from. This writer wrote fiction of a specific genre, primarily short stories, and he died at a young age. He was very influential in his genre as he created a whole structured mythos. However, he was also a big believer in white supremacy and was deeply xenophobic and anti-immigrant. H.P. Lovecraft

The third was a British writer who recently had a follow-up to an earlier BBC documentary show on his life canceled. This writer wrote many works of literature and felt slighted he didn’t win a Nobel Prize. His most famous book which was made into a critically acclaimed and successful movie involves a made-up language and a Dysotopian future. As a young man, he taught English in a British colony where he enjoyed himself with underage prostitutes and wrote about it although The BBC apparently only just noticed that. Anthony Burgess ("A Clockwork Orange")

26. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#11**
This B+ list mostly movie actress all of you know who really is only that high because of some past life choices all of you know rather than any particular acting talent was going to be stuck in business class on an international flight because no free upgrades were available. Enter that married businessman she has seen for years and she used his credit card number to pay for a first class upgrade. Katie Holmes

27. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#12**
Reader Blind Item: This permanent A list comic movie actor got his start on a long running hit network show. He is trying to head off a potentially career ending scandal which would ruin his good guy image. In college, there was a sexual assault at the fraternity he was a member of. He was present and participated in the gang rape of a drunk girl. The girl did file a complaint but as athletes were among those involved and she was very drunk the university did not act on her claim. Since then, she has occasionally contacted this comedian/actor and he has paid her money to keep quiet. Now in the wake of MeToo, she feel empowered and has contacted a famous female attorney who specializes in these types of cases. The actor is trying to negotiate a deal so she doesn’t go public. Adam Sandler (Tau Epsilon Phi/New York University); Will Ferrell (Delta Tau Delta/University of Southern California)

28. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#13**
Reader Blind Item: This classy actor not from America had a long and varied career in everything from Shakespeare to period pieces to horror movies to a key role in a past superhero franchise. Despite all this, he did not receive many honours or awards during his lifetime in his home country. His family members think this may be due to the fact he was a conscientious objector during World War II. They are planning to remedy this by launching an annual film festival bearing his name. Michael Gough (Alfred Pennyworth in all four films of the Tim Burton/Joel Schumacher "Batman" series)

29. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#14**
It looks like this former B+ list mostly television actor all of you know could be in big trouble. The actor, who most of you know from an iconic show is in trouble for some activities he participated in when he was working with this former A+ list mostly television actor from a big acting family. Apparently the lower on the list actor got caught up in hiding some USB drives for the actor which contained child porn. Brian Austin Green ("Beverly Hills, 90210")/Charlie Sheen

30. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#15**
Reader Blind Item: This action/adventure TV show with immediately recognizable title theme music also had a short lived reboot in a later decade and currently has a movie franchise bearing its name featuring a permanent A list actor which has been disowned by the original cast and creators. An interesting fact about the original show. The set was often visited by representatives of various intelligence agencies who were fascinated by the gadgets and twisty plots. Whether or not they actually tried to use them in the field is not known. "Mission Impossible"

31. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#16**
This genre director is B- list but rising thanks to the critical acclaim of his first two films and the fact he got big stars cast in them (including a back in the day child actor turned permanent A list action icon in the first, and a former A list mostly movie actor better known for comedies in his second.) All he needs is the right hit movie, and he'll get to bridge that gap to A list. Of course, that might not happen if word gets out about what he believes in before his next film comes out. There's a reason he cast that disgraced former A+ list actor everyone thinks is foreign born but technically not in that next film. During the festival run of a film the director wrote but didn't direct (a reboot of a back in the day horror franchise that is legendary by direct to video standards) whispers started leaking that the director is a white supremacist.
Director: S. Craig Zahler
First 2 movies: ("Bone Tomahawk"/Kurt Russell) ("Brawl in Cell Block 99"/Vince Vaughn)
New film: ("Dragged Across Concrete")/Mel Gibson
Reboot: "Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich"

32. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#17**
This famous and horrific crime has an anniversary next year and is due to be the subject of yet another movie, this one a big budget production by an A list director. The facts are well known except for one niggling detail that a couple of the original investigators who are still alive are hoping will one day be cleared up. The complete list of who was present did not include this significant other of one of the victims. He was supposed to be on set in Europe. However, a source who was present reports seeing him at the crime scene that night. Considering all the awful but unrelated things reported about this person over the years, this at least warrants an investigation.

Crime: Manson murders (50th anniversary August 9, 2019)
Movie: "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood"
Director: Quentin Tarantino
Significant other of one victim: Roman Polanski (Sharon Tate)

33. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#18**
This entertainment based company is doing everything they can to protect their big investors and screw over the newcomers. If their plan is approved, and they follow through, it is just about protecting people who made the idiot decision to invest in the loser of a company which I told everyone was a loser from the day they announced their ridiculous idea. Many people joined with me, but most of them jumped on board the company's train when the company bought them off with shares in the company or special events or otherwise kissed their butts. "Moviepass"

34. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#19**
This permanent A list singer/actress who is permanently A list in each separate category has been selling things off. Some have speculated it is because she needs the money for her retirement years. Nope. She is selling them off because she is being pressured/abused by someone (B- list celebrity) people think is a friend. He has walled her off from her longest known friends and restricts her access to social media and phone calls and emails. He doesn't make the kind of money he used to, so has her sell things and then says he is going to "invest" the money. Liza Minnelli/Michael Feinstein

35. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/02 **#20**
Bought And Dumped - The Whole Story: I thought about writing more about this foreign born former A list musician who was famous for buying tweens and teens from their parents to be used by him for a few weeks or months before he would sell them to other musicians or roadies and move on to the next, but I really hate that he is not in jail and when I write too much about him, I get really angry and think about all those female tweens and teens he raped for decades. His long time group mates didn't even care until he tried to rape their underage groupies and then he was gone. He is a sick f**k and takes delight in the fact he got away with it for so long. So, no, this is not about him, it is about someone else who likes to play the victim card even though he is the one at fault. I don't know what lawyer all these musicians and singers were using back in the day, but the ones in the States found a nice easy way to buy tweens and teens directly from their parents who loved having cash in their pocket and I guess decided if their kids were going to run away, they might as well get a few bucks for them first. Can you imagine some guy coming up to you right now and offering to buy your underage daughter and gladly going through some legal mumbo jumbo so it all look on the up and up. It happened more often than you think just three or four decades ago. This blind is about a permanent A list singer. A lot has been written about him and some has been written about this situation, but only told from his perspective, and not the perspective of the true victim. Somehow, our A lister would have you believe he is the victim. You know, that he was not raping some underage teen on a daily basis that he bought from her parents. He would have you believe that she was happy to be with him on a daily basis and that she loved when he would stay up snorting coke for days on end and shoving her out of the way so he could have sex with other underage teens and women that wanted to have sex with him. When she got pregnant, he knew it would put a damper on his party life. There are some that say he tried to kill her when she got pregnant, just so he could keep on partying. I don't know if he was actually trying to kill her or if it was really a freebasing accident. Whatever it was, she felt scared enough that she was willing to do the previous unthinkable which was to terminate the pregnancy. Our singer likes to say he was devastated. Screw that. He already had someone else pregnant who liked to party with him and the singer did lines of coke during the abortion. This guy has always only thought of himself. Just because he is famous, people make excuses for him. They make excuses for that permanent A lister who is in a group right now that is still A list and the time he raped a girl who was barely even a teen. He raped her multiple times, but people just keep fawning over the guy and blame it on the rock star lifestyle. Steven Tyler

36. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#1**
This writer abandoned ship in the surge of metoo. His current crew doesn’t know how he groomed aspiring young actors and filmmakers for indecent proposals and worse from his old boss. They think he’s a helluva nice guy.

37. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#2**
Don't believe the hype. This former A list mostly movie actress who probably has dropped to A- or maybe even a B+ list because she doesn't act as much, loves social media. She just doesn't want the public, or her actor husband that she has it, especially since she uses some of her secret accounts to make sure he is being relatively faithful. Mila Kunis/Ashton Kutcher

38. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#3**
That A- list reality star must have a different definition of sobriety than most people. Luann de Lesseps ("Real Housewives of New York City")

39. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#4**
Reader Blind Item: This maverick politician who is the second generation in his family to be in politics wears a very noticeable and joked about hairpiece. He is thinking of removing it and going natural as this might lend a sense of authenticity if he chooses to run again for that very high office. Rand Paul (Junior United States Senator from Kentucky)

40. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#5**
Reader Blind Item: This comedic actor who died relatively young is most famous for being the title character in a popular sitcom from the early days of television. He is also known for his lifelong friendship starting in childhood with this iconic permanently A list multiple Oscar winning actor. It was rumored that they were lovers. He had a particular kink – he liked to have sex with very heavy women and was known to seek out obese ladies of the evening. What is funny about this is the comedic actor had a small, mousy build which was part of his shtick. Wally Cox ("Mister Peepers")/Marlon Brando

41. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#6**
Yes, a lot of celebrities recently turned down an invite to a life event. It was not because of who was the subject of the invitation, but rather the full court press from family members for jobs from the celebrities and requests for money that would have been overwhelming. Joe Jackson's funeral

42. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#7**
This celebrity CEO lied to the public a couple months back when he claimed his #2 guy, who ran the manufacturing operation, was just taking a leave to spend more time with his family. Yesterday he finally had to admit the guy left the company for good. Just another item in a long list of securities fraud charges he will see from the Feds. The celebrity CEO’s company is so strapped for cash, it doesn’t have the standard spare parts inventory ready for car owners. If you get into an accident, it can take months to get your new parts. Elon Musk/Doug Field ("Tesla")

43. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#8**
A Dancing Boy Blind Item: Another one on the d/l but do you want to hear something crazy? More specifically, do you remember how in one of those early dancing boy blinds - "the Long Shadow of Abuse" - I was a kind of child lab rat, subjected to medical procedures on camera? Well, all that will be the subject of a short (connected to one of the most straight up serious features in the franchise: a full-blown tragedy, my "Chinatown" or Gatsby about a fading teen idol) called "Pool Dreams." I'm contacted in the present day by a female FBI agent, as an internet face recognition search turns up a match between one of my childhood pictures on social media, and a certain image found among a cache of illicit pictures during a raid on a man's home. It all has to do with repressed and recovered memories, and a new understanding of the past. What does my shrink recommend? A certain medical procedure, administered under sedation and involving electricity, with kind of a bad/undeserved reputation (largely because it was often done without the person's consent back in the day, and in some cases even without sedation). The idea is I'll be filmed actually undergoing and waking up from the procedure. (I don't know if it will be the first but it won't be the last insane thing I would never, ever ask anyone else to do but rush to write myself into the script doing/having done to myself.) "Pool Dreams" (Electroconvulsive therapy)

44. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#9**
The B-/C+ list celebrity offspring/part-time reality star of this A- list reality star is not even being subtle about her pay for play at this point. Delilah Hamlin (Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin)

45. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#10**
Reader Blind Item: This now retired used to be very powerful politician and party leader had a strange accident a few years ago that he attributed to a certain malfunction. The extent of the injuries was quite severe. The truth was he did take a fall and it did involve a malfunction, but the malfunction involved a mistake in his autoerotic asphyxiation practices. Harry Reid (United States Senator from Nevada from 1987 to 2017) (exercising with elastic band when it snapped)

46. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#11**
Reader Blind Item: This late comedic actor started on Broadway but is most well known for his distinctive speaking style and for his appearances on Saturday morning live action kids TV shows and afternoon game shows. When this comedic actor received fan mail from male fans, he responded with requests for nude photos. Charles Nelson Reilly

47. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#12**
Our favorite Madam is apparently feeling the sting of rejection because, although her business is doing great, no one is actually interested in being with our Madam. They all want her employees. One issue she is having is that the clients are throwing cash at her employees to not go back to the Madam and it is working. This is something she is hoping to rectify before one of her biggest celebrity nights of the year coming up very soon. Farrah Abraham (2018 MTV Video Music Awards)

48. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#13**
It would have been too suspicious to have this person end up dead in a jail. Look for this family member of a mass murderer to end up dead within the next few weeks. No one wants him talking about where he got his child porn. Bruce Paddock, the brother of Stephen Paddock responsible for Las Vegas massacre

49. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#14**
Our favorite foreign born B+ list singer/actress/fan of wire transfers from dictators found a woman to set her dad up with for her dad's birthday. Rita Ora

50. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#15**
This foreign born former B+ list singer turned B- list recovering addict/singer had to borrow money to attend an event outside her home country. She is hoping the exposure will make her some money. Lily Allen (Chanel Haute Couture show in Paris)

51. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/03 **#16**
She Got Married: It wasn't Vegas and maybe it won't be legal back here in the States, but our favorite former tweener turned A- list bad singer/actress/substance abuser hooked up with a billionaire who basically wanted a "personal performance" and paid her $500K for that performance has been inseparable from him since. He has several children and at least two former wives, but apparently knows how to throw a party. He has been showering her in presents and coke and private jets flights back and forth in between her pretty full commitments for the next six weeks. The two met last month and a week after meeting had a civil ceremony. Apparently the plan is to take things public when she goes back to Europe for press for her new movie. People have never seen her more happy. Selena Gomez ("Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation")

52. TAMARA TATTLES 07/03
This reality show pair has cut ties again. This time they have been apart for just over a month. He’s still paying her expenses though and they are trying to keep up appearances for the time being. A few months ago, he got into a bit of hot water. He hired a crisis management team and PI firm. The crisis managers refuse to take the job if he didn’t hand over his social media passwords. He did and has not posted on his social media since sources tell Tamara Tattles. Meanwhile, the crisis manager changed all the passwords and started posting photos of his children, him going to church, him with his father and with his mother, and some random dying kid with a go fund me. I mean that is not obvious at all. Her social media has become increasingly erratic during this time and it seems like lots of his vitriol toward those he feels have betrayed him is coming out on the social media. At the very least he seems to be directing the narrative on her accounts at times. The crisis manager(s) are aware of this and becoming increasingly frustrated. She’s being paid to provide someone to point to as a long-term relationship, but a recent erratic spewing of vitriol over the course of multiple days is damaging that plan as well. She doesn’t really care, she’ll be paid anyway. Allegedly, she has a sex tape that she is using as her ace in the hole to avoid working. That will work until the multiple police investigations are resolved. There is more, but for now I will leave you with news about the shady PI. He has a history with the male antagonist of this blind. Allegedly, he was previously hired to follow and collect intel on people the male subject previously had contentious relationships with. Sources tell TamaraTattles that his methodology is less than ethical and could cause even more problems than he is trying to solve. But the real kicker? Many years ago, the male subject of this blind left a woman at the altar. That woman is married to the shady PI. I CAN’T BELIEVE I HAVE TO SAY THIS, BUT DO NOT SPECULATE ON NAMES OF THE PI OR THE WOMAN LEFT AT THE ALTAR. THEY DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THE PUBLIC SCRUTINY OF A REALITY SHOW! Thomas Ravenel/Ashley Jacobs ("Southern Charm")

53. ALL ABOUT THE TEA 07/04
A reality TV girlfriend desperately wants to marry her leading man — but wants zero to do with his kids. The woman is dying for the reality dad to put a ring on it — but when they started dating, she deliberately avoided all interaction with his young children. The gal feels that his kids are difficult and manipulative, and would rather have her own children instead. The reality dad is disturbed by the woman’s apathy, and knows that she will never be an acceptable stepmother, so he keeps his children FAR away from said woman. The woman fakes devotion for the masses, but the reality dad knows that it’s all for show. Their love story is fixin’ to go south — and their days as a couple are numbered. Blind Item — Name the reality star, the girlfriend, and reality show.
Reality star: Thomas Ravenal
The girlfriend: Ashley Jacobs
Reality show: "Southern Charm"

54. MEDIATAKEOUT 07/05
MT News just got some SCORCHING hot tea, about one of the biggest couples in Hollywood. According to a celeb insider - the couple got a secret divorce. We're told that they should be an official announcement in the next year or so. [Popular couple] went through marriage counseling and tried to save their marriage and repair the problems [Male Celeb's] infidelity caused. Post counseling [Male Celeb] did not change his ways and [Wife] is tired and wanted out but didn't want the public backlash since they are Black marriage royalty. They no longer say they are married and uses the "life partner" title as a way to distract from the truth that they're really no longer legally together. They share children so they will be in each others lives forever but [male celebrity] is dating other women and will continue to be seen publicly with women because legally he's a single man. The show has really been therapeutic for [wife] and she was really emotional over the segment she did with [An ex] because she now feels the pain that[The ex] felt when [Wife] was hell bent on taking her husband. Karma is a bitch and although[The Ex] kept it classy with [Wife], she laughed her ass off behind closed doors and mentioned how everything that glitters isn't gold. [Male celebrity] only married [Wife] because she was pregnant, she was 3 months at the time of their wedding. All the we were so happy in love stuff was all a lie and it's why [Male celebrity] has continued to carry on affairs throughout their marriage because [Wife] never truly made him happy.
Male Celeb: Will Smith
Wife: Jada Pinkett Smith
The Ex: Sheree Zampino

55. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#1**
For the first time ever, the momager of all momagers got one of the suckers to actually appear on camera. This way, there can actually be a story line for the upcoming season of this reality show that features the perpetually single reality star with someone she can call her boyfriend. Interesting how all of this is playing out in front of the cameras and the breakup will also happen this upcoming season too. Apparently there is some bar in Hoboken which is going to be the setting of the breakup. That seems kind of ridiculous. Kris Jenner/Kendall Jenner/Ben Simmons ("Keeping Up With the Kardashians")

56. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#2**
This permanent A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee and a permanent chain smoker didn't even make an effort when it came to hooking up with women this past week. They had to come to him while he was at a pool and had to make all the moves. He then would take them in his cabana and let them do all the work again. Interesting side note is that he actually asked them if they were doing any yachting this summer. The term has made it into the lexicon. Sean Penn

57. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#3**
This foreign born internet famous YouTube family who are really popular in their home country are about to be awash in reports of inappropriate behavior not just with what has been reported, but also from two neighbor underage teens and from within their own house too. Chris Ingham

58. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#4**
Dear tabloids,
Just because a closeted A- list mostly movie actor with multiple movie franchises is holding hands with a woman, does not confirm a romance. It confirms that someone called to make sure it looked like a romance and that ONE pap got an excellent photo. Remarkable how that ONE pap knew when and where to be and that little handshake after with the actor sliding him a cash tip.
Love & Bacon,
Enty
Chris Pine/Annabelle Wallis

59. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#5**
It is not just the calling out by this A list producer of this foreign born A list rapper and her continued drug use after being given many opportunities to stop, it looks like she is going to be barred from working with a bunch of people unless she kicks the habit. It is really easy to lose your traction and be swallowed up by someone new coming on to the scene. She should take this seriously. Joe Budden/Nicki Minaj

60. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#6**
An owner of a decor store is probably wishing he never opened the door to this A list writer who used to be an A+ list mostly television actress. She has worked on multiple hit network shows and also done hit movies/horrible movies and theatre. Apparently she is not the nicest person to work with on home decor and the owner of the store says that if she had been his first customer, she would have been his last and he would have given up in the business. She would yell at him and his employees and reminded everyone all of the time that she is a star and they were working for her. Just awful. Mindy Kaling

61. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#7**
In the how diva can you be award category, this A list talk show host who is probably permanently A at this point and as an entertainer too wins for today. Our talk show host had their assistant ship the talk show host's mattress to a city where the talk show host was going to be performing for almost a week. One night or less, the talk show host can manage. Otherwise, the mattress is getting shipped. Whoopi Goldberg; Ellen DeGeneres

62. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06 **#8**
This foreign born A/A- list director all of you know, or at least all of you know his work has been accused as of late of some very bad behavior towards women, up to and including sexual assault. Apparently when one of my friends who has been in one of his movies confronted him about the way he made her land a part in one of his movies, but not in a pseudo sequel to it he told her it was because he could tell she wasn't trying in bed and that maybe she should fight more. He then tried to sexually assault her. I mean this is after the allegations against him so I guess he doesn't care.

63. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/06

**Elegant Degradation – A Himmmm Blind Item Story**

PART ONE
(NOTE: This is a very long blind item story. Feel free to bookmark/save it, or skip it if you're not into TL/DR – you were warned. This is Himmmm-4's story, but really an origin story for us. The memory of this event comes from all four of us; blended into one narrative by "our scribe" Himmmm-1 for you. This is the final installment of our series chronicling the lives of the friends who constitute Himmmm. When reading this story: Himmmm-1 aka BOSS aka the scribe/main-Twit; while H2 aka the movie writer-director/co-Twit. New to THIS series (but not to longtime friends/followers) is H3 aka record producer; and H4 an actor. Thank you for all of the love, laughs, warmth, and friendship you've shown to us. Thank you, Enty, for your endless hours of hard work and lifetimes of friendship. You're all welcome to feel free to be friends with us on Twitter. Except for you there in the back with that unidentified lip fungus. That's just nasty. Get that checked first, THEN we'll be friends. Although today's story does have celebs in it, this is not a big mystery to unravel. It's about sharing a human story that is very special and crazy. Real life usually is. So, for you our friends here at Crazy Days and Nights – we share THE last collective memory of OUR crazy night/day/night). They said to close my eyes, and not to open them no matter how bad it got. I agreed. And it got very bad. One voice in particular though was instantly recognizable – a gruff, hoarse voice. It was usually heard at bowel-shaking levels, blowing the roof off of coliseums and clubs: "…Happy Birthday you gigantic spoiled baby…HAP-PY BIRTH-DAY TO YOU!!!". The applause and cheers and whistles erupted. With that voice. It was the unmistakable voice of the one and only Lemmy. As I was granted permission to open my eyes – I was stunned. There was the man himself, hovering right over our dinner booth. Hat and all, the unflinching Mr. Kilmeister. "LEMMY!" I yelled. He just beamed with pride. "Of course 'ya had to open your eyes or else you'd have fuc%in' guessed Sinatra right?", and the entire room roared. I looked seated next to me in the semi-circular booth at my good friend Doc and just knew it was the happiest birthday celebration I'd known in many years. What I didn't know was that it was nearly the last for both of us. 8PM on Mon., 15 of July 1996: RAINBOW BAR & GRILL – HOLLYWOOD, CA. There are few better places on Sunset Blvd. to celebrate a birthday than the legendary Rainbow Bar & Grill. The place has been ground zero for Rock and Roll, and rockers, for decades. Best of all, it was "home office" for Lemmy – the legendary front man for Motorhead. On any given night when not on tour, Lemmy was a fixture at the end of the bar, playing video poker machines or holding court with new and old friends. The booths in the Rainbow had brass plaques above each, to advise newbies of standing reservations for legendary rockers or music industry titans. On this night – the night of my 27th birthday party, we were seated in a booth affixed with the name of someone I knew well: Ahmet Ertegun of Atlantic Records. I am Himmmm 1, aka H1, aka "scribe", and I had spent most of my life/career behind the scenes in the entertainment industry. I'd been happily dragged there this night by Himmmm 4, aka H4, also known as Doc. Although older than myself, he and I had been friends for most of our grown up lives (and grown up is a very flexible term). Doc is an A+list actor, had grown up in the movie business; and found success as easily as making friends, partying, or shuffling through girls all of his life. Both of our families had been in the entertainment industry in Hollywood and New York. Even by that point, both Doc and I had seen most sides of the industry: the good, the bad, the nasty…and the incomprehensibly tragic. We'd also cultivated certain "vices" that were common in the industry over those years too. Specifically, alcohol and drugs. Non-specific were the types. It all usually depended on what was around – marijuana, X, cocaine, heroin, or whatever. I was more of a pot-smoking, alcohol-drinking, blow of coke type who could take it or leave it at that point. But too many nights running with Doc and I began to find myself "taking it" far more often than "leaving it". When it began to be a salve to soothe my emotional scars is when I began to cut myself back. Poor Doc though – he honestly had a steady diet of "everything" anywhere in sight. His sense of moderation was based on his money resources. He was inching very close into Hunter S. Thompson levels of abuse. Somehow between his talents and charisma he always kept it cool out front. At that time and era we were all too concerned with our own individual chemicals than to care for friends, or anyone else. Because…Hollywood.

PART TWO
With us at the Rainbow was another close friend of mine named Ben, aka Himmmm 3, or H3. Ben was a writer-director-producer of movies and was just starting to rapidly gain acclaim. In fact, several of his indie projects had landed him his coveted first studio film which he was slated to begin shooting very soon. Growing up in Los Angeles with a father as an actor – Ben was a happy-go-lucky guy, with a touch of genius. Rounding out our group of friends was a music producer/engineer named Duke, aka Himmmm 2, aka H2. He too had grown up inside the industry, specifically the music industry as his father was a legendary record executive/producer/manager. Duke originally hailed from the eastern U.S., and he also happened to be a cousin of mine and a life-long friend. He was about the size of a Miami Dolphins' Tight End, but a gentle giant. It wasn't just my birthday that brought Lemmy and others over to our booth, but probably the beautiful females who had joined us to celebrate. Among those was a former child actress named Gillian, whom you'd probably call B-list in her heyday. Still acting at present, and still beautiful – she'd probably be considered C+ list now. That night she was as gorgeous as she was brilliant and she and I had re-kindled a long-lost teen flirtation. Another smart beauty in our party was Jessica, who worked at the William Morris Agency. Jess was another cousin of mine, and she helped keep me in line. (Or tried to anyway). Jess had brought along a guest for the evening, Sara. This lady was like a vault of walking Blind Items. She was a beautiful young CPA at a top business-management firm. She was secretly dating a man who was 30+ years her senior. He was an A+list songwriter who'd written some of the 70s most iconic songs (alongside a Rock Hall of Fame group with which he was associated). On the sly from him, Sara also dated a legendary A+list movie writer-director known for his odd proclivities and his weed habit which Sara revealed he was always trying to write off as a business expense. At our gathering that night at the Rainbow, Jess and Sara seemed to be having the most fun of anyone, teasing and torturing poor Lemmy. Contrary to published notions of most metal legends, Lemmy was a perfect gentleman there. But even I had to warn the ladies with that biblical proverb: "You mess with the bull and you'll get the horns." During Round #455 of drinks, Sara just so happened to remember that she'd brought my gift with her. "Oh, you didn't have to do that", I said. "I didn't", she said. "I was on my way over here from the office and ran into JN, (a former Playboy Playmate). She dropped it off to give to you from her and her husband." Now that was truly sweet. JN's hubby was a Cartier executive. Sara said, "But I brought it to you so that much counts at least". Uh, thanks? I opened up the bag and found a nice Cartier pouch. Jessica's first words: "Ooh! Me! Me, me, gimme!". I opened it up and inside was a stunning gold and diamond cross necklace. A very LARGE necklace, with seven very perfect diamonds in it. The note read: "May this forever bring you a lifetime of blessings. Love C-J". Holding it up to the light was truly brilliant. Doc then said, "Good God – do you think that's real?". I just laughed and told him I didn't think a Cartier exec gifted too much cubic zirconium. Which despite laughs, lead into Duke asking what it was worth, and Sara
settling the matter by appraising it for five-digits. All pointless because I'd never part with it for any reason, ever. An overwhelming gift of generosity and beauty, from two extraordinary friends of mine. The crowd in the Rainbow got thicker, and we all got more spirited. Doc and I stepped outside a few moments. I entrusted no one but Lemmy with that necklace since if anyone dared rip it off of him? They'd lose far more than dollar amounts – they'd lose limbs. Outside in the car Doc and I did some stupid stuff. Since it was a special occasion? We did it together. And by "together", I mean that I smoked a joint while watching him smoke heroin. We shared a rail of cocaine. I appreciated his offering to share his drugs – especially since I'd paid for them with the loan I'd given him earlier. "Happy Birthday, buddy", he said. "I'm going to get you like a giant brick of Mexican weed, any day now. Just as soon as you spot me the money to cover it." Really, that's fine. I'm good. As we floated back inside, we suddenly found ourselves the center of attention. Everyone was having a great time dancing, eating, flirting, and singing. In what had been a long-standing tradition among us friends for years, we always did a "Birthday Crawl" for my special day. Not unlike a pub crawl, it is where we bounce from place to place drinking and partying over the period of around a day (or longer) until I've had enough and swear off birthday's forever. Well, not birthdays but…the parties anyway. A movable feast that usually results in famine. This year we decided to do the Rainbow, followed by The Whisky, followed by the "real" day-long party – at a Los Angeles-area motel. Since we had in mind just such a long-established "home away from home" over in Burbank? We spread the word. Sadly, in was Summer in Hollywood – June exactly, which meant most people were on vacation. As the drinking and cavorting continued up to midnight at the Rainbow, we were informed it was time to stagger down the street for "Round Two". Our friends headed to The Whisky-A-Go-Go (aka The Whisky) first, for the first set of the rock show. It was one of those alt-rock showcase nights with multiple bands playing. Bidding our goodbyes and thanks, we stumbled down the Sunset Strip sidewalk's short distance from Rainbow to Whisky. We wrangled everyone we knew to join in our little party led by the giant Duke.

PART THREE
12AM on Tues., 16 of July 1996: THE WHISKY – HOLLYWOOD, CA.
We had cell phones (and interwebs too!) back in those ancient days; neither of which worked very well or consistently. Through the invention of the "land line" phone some 100+ years before, we still managed to keep in touch. Luckily, Duke had called ahead and we had friends waiting for us up the street. A quick knock on the load-in doors (and knowing the management) allowed us to avoid the main doors. Inside the hallowed/stained walls of the nightclub, we ran into more friends, actors, actresses, and musicians. There were also lots and lots of very attractive models. All of whom Doc was sure to tell "it's my Birthday", while pointing to himself. Amazingly enough, Doc had been married for a couple of years by now. I'd never seen him cheat, ever – but he was the Michael Jordan of world class flirts. There was a very aggressive young lady who was hanging all over Doc like a drunken prom date, much to Ben's hilariously-constant laughter. She was very short, very young, and very talkative about Doc's celebrity career. None of which interested my friend in the least. I think it was Ben who said she looked like the mix of Steve Guttenberg and Wallace Shawn. In hindsight, we were so messed up that the girl may actually have been Wallace Shawn. Rock groups came on, played, and moved through their sets. One after the other. Meanwhile, Duke kept chatting up a very disinterested lady with lots and lots of hair. I told Doc that Duke should definitely invite her to the motel. Doc smiled. "She looks like Doug Henning. You know, the poodle that does magic tricks." I told him to behave. He didn't. "I once knew a trick that did magic poodles." Just stop, Doc. Really. Stop. As the last band was blasting through a Ramones cover, we saw it was now almost 2AM. I grabbed Duke and told he and Ben it was time to head to "the Annex to party". Duke's eyes got huge: "You mean THE Annex?". Yes. Ben was trying to convince the magic poodle to join us. Doc just yanked Duke away, very hyper, dragging him through the crowd. Much to the crowd's dismay. Duke yanked free, and stepping through the hallway he began to vent his spleen at me, Ben, Jess, Sara, and everyone around…except Doc (who had somehow slipped off through the mob). "I'm sick of that shit man! I know it's your birthday and everything but he has to cool it. Why's he gotta be such a dick every time we go anywhere? And he gets so fu%&d up? I was talking to that girl and he had to be a dick! Just 'cause he's the big hot-shot??". I was trying to keep Duke cool, as our little crowd was easing to the exit doors. The house lights were threatening to come up inside and that's a harsh light in which nobody In L.A. ever wants to be seen. As we half-stepped out, Duke ranted: "It's like I swear, every single time we go out; people always point, and shout…" With flawless timing, Doc walks up totally out of nowhere, deadpan - he sings: "…there goes John-Jacob-Jingleheimer-Schmitt. Nah-Nah-Nah-nah-na-na!". Jessica and Ben EXPLODE in cackling laughter, as does everybody around us. Except poor Duke – who just seethes at Doc. Trying to remain sincere, I fight back the chuckle. "It's okay buddy, he means well." Hopeless, I too start laughing. Thankfully, Duke also breaks down, and we're all enjoying it, heading back out to the Sunset Strip crowd on a beautiful July birthday night.

PART FOUR
We all huddled together, rounding the corner to the big main entrance. The first person I see coming out of the main doors is an icon I instantly recognize. Together with two other "actors" they are making their way through the crowd. Past the throngs milling around the long rope line stretching down the walk. There together standing on the sidewalk, they were a trio of acting/celebrity legends which truly made for strange bedfellows. The trio included an aging, legendary male porn Actor JL; whose career was rivaled only by his handsome looks and actual acting talent. Beside of him was the unmistakably gorgeous, still-breathtaking Platinum Princess of Porn, MM. Seeing her that night? Her physical attributes had only thrived in the decades since making her mark as one of porn's first and most legendary beauties. Rounding out this...trio...was a truly odd-placed celebrity whom no human would EVER place in the same sentence with either of the two aforementioned celebs. It was GG, an, A+list, comedy actress; (possibly known more in recent years as an A+list television host more than any of her prior habits anyway). Those two different-style actresses were roommates living together for many years in Hollywood, even after finding success. On that night, their affable male escort seemed happy to just be along for the show. Ben had availed himself of meeting MM while doing some writing research in the past; and was duly geeked-out seeing her outside the club. As most guys were. Having known her a long while myself, I stopped to exchange hugs, kisses, and handshakes there. I got to meet the comedy actress who was a friend of Doc – and I got great birthday wishes as she led EV-ERY-ONE within blocks in another rendition of "Happy Birthday" to me. I invited the trio to our motel party but they had plans elsewhere. We hugged goodbye and thanks…until I realized we were being drowned out by the LOUD intoxicated cursings of an obnoxious idiot. It was MO, an A+list Italian fashion mogul; his bodyguard; and two European wannabe-models (who looked barely old enough to drive). That mogul was known as much for his offensive personal behavior as he was for the outsized wealth his labels brought him alongside his family member/business partner. It was nothing for them to bribe, buy, or bully their way into or out of anything they desired. But if none of that worked? He would happily harass, abuse, threaten, or rape models and others. It was anyone's guess as to how many lives he ruined. I noticed MM, the porn princess, recoil and turn her back – rolling her eyes as she stepped closer to Duke and myself. Then the fashion mogul spoke: "Well, you can take the girl out of the trash but never take the trash out of the girl right?" Laughing at himself, he turned to the black actress: "Are you two dykes now, huh? Because that's a movie I WOULD pay to see! You can do the golden showers on each other!" He began to laugh at his own stupid, disgusting jokes. "Call it – Gold, Ebony, and Ivory". As quick-witted as GG the comedy actress is known for being with her comebacks - even she didn't have time to get a word out. Because before the smirk could melt from the Colgate-white smile of "Il Douche'"...several of his pearly chicklets were on the sidewalk, alongside a puddle of his blood and ego. The Peroxide Princess had jumped from between me and Duke, and straight-shot-punched the fashion magnate in the face. I mean punched HARD too. He just stood there shocked, like the little bitch he was. Just like his "bodyguard" had too. The comedy actress – and our entire crowd - couldn't catch a breath from either shock or laughing so hard. All while the male porn actor shook his head in disbelief and pride. He said, "See why I always ASK nicely before I share bodily fluids with her? Try asking nicely." The fashion mogul spit blood on the sidewalk, holding his face but not his anger. "You fu%&ing CU-…" Then Duke stepped forward, as did JL the porn actor and Sara…all three. Mr. Mogul just stopped, as did his associate. They realized that was the end of it. The porn actress had circled behind me, and had her arms wrapped around me, hugging my waist. All six-foot-two inches of Duke said: "Best thing all of YOU can do? Just call it a night." They did, tucked-tail, and walked away. The comedy actress and porn queen both howled and laughed. "Thank you ALL so MUCH!", said MM. "Several years ago he tried to rape me, forced me to…", and she stopped. GG just hugged her, and told her to forget it all. After more hugs and much love, they melted back into the nearby mob all streaming inside. It was then we realized Doc had vanished. Totally. Sara said he'd mumbled about needing to call his wife, but Ben said he'd left to go get me a birthday present. We all laughed, because Doc never – ever- ever had any money. But it was nice to know that beneath his permanent bankruptcy were good intentions. Since he knew where we were heading? He'd find us if he wished.

PART FIVE
3AM - THE SAFARI INN MOTEL – BURBANK, CA
Located in "beautiful downtown Burbank", is one of the true secrets of the Los Angeles area. Built in the 1950s, it looks like any one of thousands of motor inns to dot the landscape of America. Back before interstates and strip malls. But what makes the Safari so unique is it's art-deco neon sign and motel design. Still looking like a time capsule, it has been featured in films and television shows including Apollo 13; CSI; Coach Carter; and plays a prominent role in the film True Romance (as the motel where James Gandolfini's mobster hit man nearly beats Patricia Arquette
to death). Many non-L.A. people may assume the motel is in Hollywood proper, near the strip. In truth, it is located over the hill in Burbank – next to Warner Bros. Studios. (Close to where "Bo Duke" once had a Lamborghini dealership back in the 1980s. I swear. Only in Burbank would a Dukes of Hazard actor own a Lamborghini dealership). It isn't just The Safari's location that has given it the name "The Warner Annex" or "The Annex" over the decades. It is because of a shared history. One that includes many secret rendezvous; clandestine business meetings; or even just a home-away for actors, artists, and executives when working at the studio. Unlike the posh Beverly Hills Hotel; or the Beverly Wilshire – anyone can drive right up to the Safari Inn and grab an affordable room for the night. Or even (like many hot-sheet motels) for an hour or two. An entire generation of us who "grew up" as "studio brats" have carried on the traditions of using the Safari as a place to party or to host poker games. This includes all four of us original Himmmms. That pool and deck have also been an inspiration for many screenwriters. Our traveling party rolled up to the motel in the wee hours, but the party arrived early. Being on a first-name basis with management was great (but the large tip/insurance bond was even better). In fact, not a single tourist registered a complaint that night (because we'd paid to book the entire motel which in no way was as extravagant as it sounds. In fact, it was Duke's gift to me to cover the motel cost. Our bar tab was higher than that). Looking like a leftover from the Sinatra era, we took the "Poker Suite" that Ben and I had used to host many all-night games. Already rocking was some great DJ music, drinks, and skinny-dipping from the braver souls. Ben was on the upper pool deck, explaining to Sara and Jessica about this incredible new film that just wrapped. It was sort of a teen horror-comedy by Wes Craven and starring Neve Campbell and Courtney Cox from Friends. It was called "Scary Movie", but Miramax was looking at other titles like "Afraid", and "Scream". Craven was currently editing it in post that same night. While Ben drank and geeked on the girls, my actress friend Gillian and I sat up on the pool deck, having a "smoke" and relaxing. The more we drank, the more weed I smoked until I was perfectly in tune with the music playing. Duke had brought this new CD by our friends' band "The Wallflowers". I coaxed Gillian into a swim – it was technically my birthday – so we didn't worry with details like swimwear. When Jakob Dylan began singing "One Headlight" – a perfect new L.A. anthem, every sense in my body began to warm up at once. Gillian and I embraced and sort of drifted in the cool water together…letting in the music as the neon of the big motel sign washed over us. "Happy Birthday, goofy" she whispered to me with a kiss. "Thanks, goober" I replied. I noticed her staring for a long time with a sort of silly perma-smile on her face. When I asked, she said she was just thinking about when we met the first time. Not even 10 years ago, but a lifetime prior. Several lifetimes prior, or so it felt. The miles, colleges, relationships, work, fame…all down stream now. Somehow, we'd re-connected and still felt like kids. "What did you think back then when you first met me? When we were teenagers, on set of the night shoots?", she asked. I couldn't believe she asked me that question. I smiled. "I thought you were the most gorgeous girl I'd ever seen. I thought every night I saw you felt like New Years' Eve just looking at you", I said. Before I could say another word, she took her finger and put it over my lips to stop me. She wrapped her legs around me under the water, and leaned close to kiss me. After a lifetime of soft kisses, growing more passionate, we never separated for air. There we began making love in the night-time pool as (the then-new CD) of Dave Matthews' Band's "Crash Into Me" began playing. We kept time with the music, and each other, my back against the pool wall. After what seemed like an entire extra year, I noticed most of the party had moved indoors. "Good", she smiled back to me. I asked her the same question she had earlier asked me…about her first impression of me all those many years ago on a film set. She fixed her gaze very serious on me. "I thought you were the most arrogant guy alive", she laughed. I dunked her.

PART SIX
So the night and early morning hours continued. I personally drank all the rum. Ever. In the world. Thankfully, not alone in doing so. Gillian and I woke up a twisted pile of our own bodies in the bed. I focused my very blurry eyes to see Ben and a young lady who was not his girlfriend in the next bed. Wrapping the sheet around me, I zombied over to the door and saw Duke, Jessica, and several others outside by the pool. I opened the door and was hit with a blast furnace of a million degree heat. I rapidly closed it back, and vaulted in the bed. I nudged Gillian awake and asked her if she wanted me to get her any breakfast? Without even opening an eye, she groggily replied: "It's afternoon, babe". Damn. Really? Yes, really. Apparently I had already had breakfast and lunch both. Washed down with Bloody Mary's. Gillian commended me on my nutrition, but acted startled when I swore to her I could not recall us taking a shower together in the bathroom there after breakfast. "You're an Alcoholic…Second step is admitting you have a problem baby", she said deadpan. "I'm not an alcoholic. I only do this once a year", I replied. She cocked open a stunning eye at me: "See? Denial? It's first sign of an alcoholic. I graduated from an Ivy League school, okay sweetie?" I raised up on my elbow, rubbing my eyes: "Wait – so if I deny it? I'm a lush. But if I admit it – I'm still a lush?" She propped her chin on my chest. "Better stop drinking altogether then", she said. And with a delayed reaction, I burst out laughing at her. A loud knock at the door, and it was Jessica. Carrying grocery bags and trailed by Duke. They plopped the food and booze on the table, and in the fridge. "Annnddd…what was that about alcoholism?", teased Gillian. "What? Are you saying he's an alcoholic because he lives his birthday like Senior Beach Week…and he's almost THIRTY??", asked Jess with a laugh. I yelled: "She said both of you are alcoholics!" Gillian slapped me. Duke and Jess looked at each other and just shrugged. Ben jumps up out of bed: "Holly balls! Is it almost supper time??". "No", I said. "It's just after lunch." With his flawless timing, Doc comes rolling in the room like a tornado: "Wake up sleepy-heads, it's almost supper time!", and body-flops on top of me and Gillian. We ALL laughed, except Ben who had flopped back in his bed. Doc whispers to Gillian: "You know – I'd be into the whole threesome thing right now, but just with you two. Or maybe you and Jess, and we send him out for ice?", he teased her. "THUD", was the sound of Doc hitting the floor when I kicked him out of the bed. Gillian laughed, and disappeared into the bathroom with Jess. I asked Doc about his exploits, and he says he stayed there with us until breakfast. He said he had to visit his manager, and just got dropped back off now to keep the party rolling. Randomly, Ben raises up in bed and tells Duke: "Oh, do what we did last night! Play 'Outshined"! You know this is where True Romance was shot outside right?". Doc said: "Really?". With that, Duke played the CD. Doc then he told me and Duke that he had some people who wanted to come to the party if we could pick them up. This included an A+list actress that he knew Ben really wanted to see that night. Ben had run into her just last week on the 20TH Century Fox studio lot where she was shooting a new film with Daniel-Day Lewis. Ben said it would be his dream to work with them both on a film or just meet them. Doc said he'd made all the arrangements for us to get "yummy" takeout from the Formosa for supper; and that the actress was going to meet him there in an hour. He said she was "tired of being bored to death by some Beverly Hills 90210 cast member all afternoon". He said there were tons of "party favors" – aka weed/drugs - and we needed to re-stock for the grand finale Safari party tonight. All we needed to do was to meet her and the supplier at the Formosa bar/restaurant off Sunset; and bring the actress and the rest of the fun back with us. Much as I love the Formosa and tempting as it was? I didn't want to leave Gillian alone; nor to leave my own party. No way Doc was using my car, either. Then half-dead Ben said he'd drive Doc and they'd be right back. After another swim and shower, Gillian and I decided to put that alcoholism thing to the test by inventing new drinks. Duke, Sara, Jess, and everyone else were having a blast. People coming and going in/out of our rooms, and music playing. It looked like for ONCE my birthday was going to end with smiles, and not regrets from our "crawl". In hindsight – I'd have chosen a hangover instead.

PART SEVEN
5PM - THE SAFARI INN MOTEL – BURBANK, CA
Gillian and I were considering trying convenient places to put ice cubes when we'd run out of ice for drinks. Duke and Jess were digging through music choices; and the other crazy kids were next door, so Gillian volunteered for the "ice machine run". As she left, two guys walked in that I'd never seen in my life. I'm sure I would remember if I had; as one was the size of a house and the other the size of a truck. In fact, let's call them Mr. House and Mr. Truck. They were not there to jump out of any birthday cakes either. They were looking for Doc, and by the anger on their faces – it was not to discuss a new movie. I introduced myself, and suggested we talk in private – with Duke at my side. The two big guys explained to me that they were "associates" of Doc's (and we all knew what that meant). Doc had stopped by their apartment earlier, and left without saying goodbye. Or paying. Apparently Doc already owed them several thousand dollars and he'd departed with a quantity of white powder…and no permission to take it. I sobered up rapidly, and understood totally. I told the men I was willing to cover what I was sure was an "oversight" on my idiot friend's behalf. They said that would be fine; but they were still going to be waiting for Doc's return…just to clear this up in person. They weren't asking. Around that time Gillian returned with the ice, and I told her that she needed to leave. She could see by my face, and the two giant men, that I was serious. Duke nodded. Jess and Sara and the others partying by the pool needed to go too. The party was over. Gillian declared she was staying. I told her I would call her later, and please leave now. I was rude about it. Truth was? I had no idea what this would turn into, if anything. I hoped nothing. But in a situation like this – it is always best to cut down on the number of people around who may either get hurt or arrested. Judging by the looks of these twin towers – they were not looking to arrest Doc. Jess was staying put, but Sara drove Gillian home. She wasn't too happy about leaving – but I hoped for the chance to explain it all and make it up to her later. Soon thereafter, Duke and I saw Ben and Doc return to the parking lot. Without anyone else. When the door to the room opened, Doc walked in and saw the five of us in there waiting. He was pretty close to wasted, but Ben was stone-cold sober and white as a sheet. Ben said he had to talk to me, but we were all a bit busy. Now that we were all on the same page, I told Doc I would pay what he owed. A tense discussion began, and Ben kept trying to get my attention. I was more concerned with keeping everyone cool and calm, which was hard when Doc was yapping a mile a minute. I shouldn't have bothered even worrying. As the "discussion" grew more heated, I finally asked everyone to stop. I looked at Jess, and she and I both agreed that we'd go with Mr. Mountain to get them the money. Mr. Truck could stay in the room with Duke, Doc, and Ben. Everyone seemed in agreement, and we opened up the door to leave. Out on the walkway deck, we saw three more large men walking. Our way. I didn't know them or what they wanted but they too did not look happy to be there. This was not what I had in mind for a party. Blocking the way between the walkway and the steps, one of the three no-neck men asked if we were with "Doc's party". (A question I was getting sick of answering). Jess and I looked at each other – then at Mr. Mountain, who shrugged. I nervously told them "yes", half expecting to see cuffs or hear shots. The three men smiled, and – oddly – introduced themselves. All three had Eastern European names and accents. They invited us to return to the room we'd just left. When the door opened, and we walked in with our new guests…the shock and confusion on Duke's face said it all. One of the new arrivals closed the door behind us. Almost on cue, Doc smiled and began counting heads: "One, two, three…ten. Sorry guys, I think we're only allowed five per room so some of you are going to need to leave." He laughed like it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. Since he was higher than a giraffe's ass by then, it probably was. One of the Europeans said, "If we throw you off this balcony a few times – will numbers be okay then?". Doc abruptly stopped laughing. I introduced myself to the United Nations Delegates, and said: "Let me guess…", nodding to Doc. "More friends of his?". They nodded their heads up and down, silently. Doc shrugged like "Who me?". Jess rolled her eyes so hard I thought she had a seizure; Duke said "shit"…and poor Ben wilted. Duke – no longer the largest man in my presence, sat down softly beside of Jess on the bed. The five BIG men – aka the Rams Offensive Line – stood closest to the door.

PART EIGHT
Turns out my buddy Doc had been having a very, very busy day indeed. Specifically – ripping off drug dealers. First? He pocketed several thousand dollars worth of drugs from the first two guys. The same two gentlemen to whom he'd already owed several thousand dollars before this day. Next? He'd apparently taken that stash (and after doing some for himself which he'd tried to hide by diluting the powder); went to trade it for another type of drug to the European gentlemen now joining us. Technically, they were Albanian. So now here we were in a Burbank motel with not one, but TWO sets of very pissed-off drug dealers. None of which had anything to do with me. So much for the glamour of Hollywood. Ben caught my look of shock and said: "That's what I was trying to tell you ever since we got back." Gee, thanks. So noted. Now the man who was obviously the chief of the Albanian delegation looked to me for answers…that is, once Mr. Mountain had (to my chagrin) explained I had offered to cover Doc's debt to them. This man wanted answers, and the pistol he made sure we could all see in his waistband seemed to make me want to give them to them. I explained who I was; about my birthday; and about my "friend" (now a very loose term) named Doc who was trying to throw me a birthday party, complete with party supplies. "You don't look like a coke head, or a junkie", correctly surmised the big Albanian. "Excuse me?", chimed in Doc. "It's called Substance Abuse Disorder and it's not nice to besmirch your own customers". I shot Doc a look that reminded him I was inches from ripping his pancreas out and beating him with it. I did not blink. He just mumbled something beneath his breath; and slinked into a very small shell. I apologized to the men, then I explained that I wasn't the addict in the room. I explained that I was more of a Rum drinker, but Doc's intentions were at least good in trying to give me a gift. "We will take $15,000 to cover the product, debt, expenses, and…trouble", the Albanian said. To which Mr. Mountain added, "after we get our $10,000 first." So apparently, in order for all of us to go home – intact and soon – I now had to come up with $25,000 cash. One of the Albanians began to beep, and he pulled out a pager from his pocket. He showed the display to his two partners. They all smiled big and said what I hoped meant "good news" in Albanian. I didn't care so long as they stayed in good spirits. "Sorry guys – forgive me since I don't normally handle these things, but I'm guessing you want that money in cash right?", I asked. They did a double-take almost as if they weren't sure I asked that question. "Uh…yeah", said Mr. Albania. "In one lump sum, no checks or credit cards", he smiled. I thanked them. Doc tried one last shot at making himself known again, by reminding all of the drug dealers there that for many years they were happy to take his money; to take his bonuses; and to overcharge him. They'd made fortunes from his friends and connections too and he didn't think it was too much to ask for them to show a little respect to him and his earning potential. It was then one of the Albanians smiled at Doc, put his arm gently on his shoulder and said: "Agreed. Which is why you and your friends are all alive; your family is alive; and you are not bleeding to death right now. We give you credit, you steal from us, and you lie to us." "Shut up Doc", I said. We had a little pow-wow with my friends sitting there on the bed. We had a few serious obstacles: A) It is just after Fourth of July in Hollywood – everyone's out of town. And, B) It is Summer/July in Hollywood – so everyone's out of town. Then, C) Even those who are stuck shooting in town? It's Summer, July, and after the Fourth so…you guessed it. They're on vacation out of town. The bank offices are closed, as would be all business offices right now. Even so, cashing a $25,000 check would never pass IRS muster. Between myself, Ben, Jess, and Duke we could pull down MAYBE about $5,000 in cash from ATMs at this time of evening. In these days before smartphones and PayPal there was little else we could access. There were lots of people who'd spot us the money, but good luck with a passable story once they saw Mr. Olympia in tow.

PART NINE
One name DID pop into my head as a good shot – if he's in town. I told the Albanian about a Director pal of mine. I paged him and his wife both. In minutes, the phone rang. It was TS, an A+list action director, with his wife present on the call too. Since I'd introduced them years ago, I knew them both well enough not to be shy. TS said "no problem, mate. Just tell me how you want it and pay me back later." What a God-send! Unfortunately, they were both out of town. His new action movie was slated to open that week (and judging from the result he may need the money worse than I did). I thanked them, and fast ran out of options. If we called any managers or agents it would be all over town by midnight. No way in hell was I asking my Mother; and I never kept cash like that in my own house. We discussed Western Union but that would mean transfers, records, and family back in New York. We were still coming up about $20,000 short when Jess (the smart, lone female in the room) said the magic word: "Lemmy". I got it. Ben and Duke got it too. She was referring to the diamond Cartier necklace I'd gotten earlier for my birthday gift – which I'd asked Lemmy to hold for me at the Rainbow. When Doc and I went outside. I had simply forgotten to get it back from him. If we could get hold of Lemmy now and get that necklace back? I was sure the Albanians would be happy to take it as a trade. After all, Sara (a CPA) put the value in the five-figure range anyway. I recall the note on the gift, and thinking then that I'd keep it forever. Considering that these no-neck guys were not ASKING for the money, but demanding? Forever was short time. "Wait – you know Lemmy? THE Lemmy? Lemmy from Motorhead?", like a stuttering parrot the Albanian boss could go rob a store together. Then Jess said: "With your luck? Your lawyers would be on vacation". Lawyers. LAWYER! I explained to our thick-headed negotiators that I had a "special family attorney" I can call in "emergencies", even if it wasn't (yet) technically my emergency. It was then that I explained to them why we needed a lawyer on call for family emergencies. After explaining it the third time…slowly, the way you might to a drooling vegetable…the Albanian boss began to understand. They also began to agree with us that this was how they'd get their cash tonight. "I like this friend, Doc", said the nice Mr. drug dealer who turned to his two comrades. "Maybe we kidnapped the wrong one?", and they laughed. I turned to Duke and said, "Okay, if Jess drives to the ATM at the studio credit union and you drive Ben here to the ATM over at…" Wait – what? What did I just hear? I turned to the three un-wise men. They were not laughing. "Excuse me, gentlemen", I said. "I'm sorry but what did you mean by 'kidnap' exactly?", looking at the boss. They never replied, nor explained, nor budged. They stood there, stone faced. I asked again, and did it with more urgency. Still nothing. Then, from out of the blue, Mr. Mountain says: "Relax…not yours. Doc's." I whipped around, and Doc was staring – silently – at a spot on the wall. Like an embarrassed little child. Scolded, ashamed to be exposed. Gallon-sized tears in his eyes, and a quiet stream down both his cheeks…but not crying. Mr. Mountain continued, "It's how things are done over a certain dollar amount. That was your pager, right?", he asked of the Albanians. They shrugged. Still, Doc said nothing. My friend just hung his head, and said nothing. At that moment I could see my friend's naked soul and hurt. The nightmare he was caught in. Powerless to do anything about it. He had sold his soul; and the life of a loved one for a punched-ticket ride he was unable to stop. Not just tonight. Not just this time. This obviously was not his first go through hell like this, even if it was ours. Doc was dying of a disease of addiction, and his self-immolation was engulfing those he loved most. It is something only an addict caught under the wheels of that bus can know. And only those who love an addict caught inside the grinder can know the helplessness that pulls in two different directions. Even with all the crap and trouble and money he was costing me – I still wanted to help my friend. Maybe more than ever. Just then he looked over at me with a look that said: "don't give up on me yet". I just nodded up and down. Friends don't give up on each other. Especially when they're in the midst of the battle for their own lives. Jess suggested we get down to business.

PART TEN
I explained some details to the Albanians, such as how certain lawyers handle certain things. The man I was going to contact was a very special lawyer like that, and he did not work in a courtroom. The more I explained the more they understood what a "fixer" was – and why we…like they too I'm sure…need to speak in certain codes. They understood this as well. Finally, I informed them that if they wanted to see one dollar, they must do everything exactly as dictated by the lawyer. If they wished to spend a dime of it, they likewise must never attempt to contact me, my family, or…my friends. Ever. Including Doc. I said it loudly, for all to hear, and for a specific reason. Everyone agreed. "Yeah?", said the lawyer answering the phone. I took a deep breath and spoke into the receiver: "Sorry K, it's me. I need an…an abortion. You see we -". He cut me off instantly. "Stop kid, stop. All I need to know is this: Can you travel? What time? What's the amount for the abortion?" The Albanian boss looked puzzled as we shared the receiver in the motel room. "Yes, I can travel. Yes, two hours…and yes, the abortion costs uh…$25,000 in cash." The Albanian nodded. "Fine kid, fine. See you in my firm's driveway in two hours." Click. I explained to everyone that we all must now travel to the parking lot of a Century City law firm. In two hours a limousine will pull up and drop the cash to me and I will pay everyone. As Doc (obviously) knew the Albanians' residence, there's no profit motive in them hurting the kidnap victim. Likewise, Mr. Mountain & Truck were known. With two hours to get to Century City from Burbank – no fear of us going to the law. Just to be sure, Duke agreed to ride with Albanians and Ben with the other two. Jess and Doc with me in my car. We traveled in line to be sure.

A CENTURY CITY LAW FIRM – LOS ANGELES, CA
Arriving in the parking lot of the law firm, it was strangely quiet that evening. The front lot adjacent to the parking garage was empty, and we all pulled in. Almost on cue – so did a black limo. I walked over to the window, and it was an elderly man who had been like an Uncle to me all my life. He asked one question: "Friends of the family?". I shook my head, "No – more consonants than vowels." He nodded, and handed me a folder. He exited the ride – his back to the waiting cars the entire time. He walked into the lobby of the firm and disappeared. The waiting limo sat and idled, waiting to transport my friend home for me. I walked to the waiting cars, as my friends emerged. The drug dealers in each car got paid. We exchanged assurances again, and I shook hands with the men to whom I gave the money. Heading different directions through the city, they drove off as fast as we wished them to disappear. Ben asked:"You sure they'll let her go?", as I shrugged. Duke said it happened sometimes in the music business – dealers wanna get paid. It's not like a hostage/torture thing, but more of the "victim" being inconveniently detained. They watch a movie or something, til the payment then they go free. He said:"But if no money comes? That's when it could get ugly. Otherwise, everybody goes home without much fuss. Only in L.A." I told him it was still a total dick move to put somebody through. Not only for his family – but for
the price I'd hoped it wouldn't cost me with Gillian later. Then again, those of us without sin should just shut the hell up I guess. I told Duke he can drive; and for Jess and Ben to hop in my car. I wanted to talk to Doc before I had the car take him home. Jess gave Doc a pitiful hug; and even big Duke shook hands with the guy who only the night before he was ready to beat up himself. Ben said it would all make for a hell of a movie one day – but nobody would probably ever believe it really happened. Doc told him that indeed, he predicted that Ben would make a movie out of it someday and win all the awards, ever. (Funny enough, I've seen parts of that prophecy come to fruition). I told my friends to wait in the car for me. Sitting there on the curb alone, staring into a purple sunset sky, was my friend Doc. "Helluva birthday, huh?", he asked awkwardly. We both just stared into the sky in a brief silence. "Yeah…helluva birthday", I said. "Guess you'll never speak to me again, huh?", he asked. "Of course I will. You owe me money", I replied. We both began to laugh. That kind of gallows laughter that only comes at the end of a nightmare. "I really am sorry", he said – and he meant it. In all the years we'd known each other I saw for the first time that he was reaching out to me for help. Not just to save his life, but those around him who loved him. The limo driver opened the car door for him. Doc smiled at me: "You know, it's still early. We could hit a few bars, a few clubs…I know this sexy crazy actress we can meet at the Formosa…" "GO HOME!", I said with a laugh. I hugged him, and told him goodbye – his laugh echoing in my head. I wrote a drop off address on paper and handed it to the driver. "Straight here, no matter what he says. Period." The driver nodded at me, and my friend rolled down the window: "Hey listen! It's that Jakob Dylan song you guys were all talking about from last night!", as he began to mimic the words: "Come on try a little, nothing is forever; There's got to be something better than, In the middle…" As my friend waved goodbye with those eerily haunting words ringing in my head. I knew it would not be the last time I'd ever see him. This one I knew. For a fact. We made a promise in that parking lot, sitting together there on that curb. We promised that no matter what ever happened in this lifetime, that we'd be there for the other. That we'd save each other and that there would never be any judgment or back-turning from the other. It has been the most painful, difficult, and often-impossible promise any two friends could ever make to the other. Because doing what is best for someone is not the same as letting them do what they wish. It's a lesson I've learned over and over again when I wish I'd been able to save brothers who just "want to be left alone". Fortunately, I never left Doc alone. He never left me alone either. He saved my life as many – or more – times than I saved his. Sometimes we do get to live long enough to see that ending turn out happy. All it takes is the will to change; the right friend; the right love; and the strength to see the sun rise just one more day. It took many more nightmares, fights, debts, and near-deaths before he realized I was not going to give up. That I was not going to turn my back on him. That I was not going to "leave him alone", or let him down. He could hate himself and lie to himself all he wished – but I loved my friend, my brother. When it finally…many, many years later began to occur to him that I wasn't ever going to abandon him? He asked me about "that birthday night". "What about it?", I replied. "When you sent me home…afterward. The limo driver? Did you do it on purpose or was it an accident?", he asked. Just as he's asked many times since. Each time - I just smile. It may be the only question he's ever asked me which I've never answered. I always change the subject. Sometimes we can call it fate, God, the universe…or a friend who knows the difference between bull-shitting yourself…and bull-shitting him. All that is really important is that friends will do anything for each other, even when it is painful. Just like that night when the car reached it's destination: At 8PM that Tuesday, 16 of July 1996. MALIBU, CA.
THE END?

YEAR: 1996
H1 aka "scribe":
H2 aka the movie writer-director (Duke):
H3 aka record producer (Ben):
H4, aka A+ list actor (Doc): Kiefer Sutherland (Doc Scurlock in "Young Guns")
Former child actress named Gillian: Meredith Salenger
Sara dating A+ list songwriter and legendary A+ list movie writer-director:
JN: a former Playboy Playmate
JL: aging, legendary male porn Actor: Richard Pacheco
MM: gorgeous, still-breathtaking Platinum Princess of Porn: Seka
GG: an, A+ list, comedy actress: Whoopi Goldberg

MO: an A+ list Italian fashion mogul:
A+ list actress (Daniel Day Lewis film): Winona Ryder ("The Crucible")
"Beverly Hills 90210" cast member: Shannon Doherty
TS: A+ list action director: Tony Scott/Donna W. Scott ("The Fan")
Teen horror-comedy by Wes Craven and starring Neve Campbell and Courtney Cox: "Scream"

64. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#1**
When she gets to this point, there is no one who wants to be romantically involved with the former tweener actress/singer turned A- list adult singer. She becomes horrible to be involved with so, she ends up having one night stands, mostly with women, and often women she pays for an evening so she feels she can be mean to them. Demi Lovato

65. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#2**
I have been writing for months that this A list rapper who thinks he is all that because he came up with a stupid name and does coke 24/7 specializes in getting his significant others addicted to coke and then making them do things they don't want to do before chewing them up and spitting them out and not caring at all what happens to the person. That one named singer is finding that out every day. Imagine how she feels thinking some guy loved her when he ruined her reputation and there are dozens of videos of him with other women and doing coke with them and them either having sex with him or a line of them orally servicing him. If our one named singer wants to compound her suffering than she should continue her rebound with the three named guy because he is almost as bad. G-Eazy/Halsey/Machine Gun Kelly

66. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#3**
This tour will hit full on brake mode if the higher on the list one finds out her husband hit on the slightly lower on the list part of the tour who is also married. This is a really bad idea.

67. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#4**
I don't know if it makes him feel young or what, but this permanent A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee and stars in two of the biggest movie franchises of all time likes to go with when people buy drugs for him. Apparently he likes to know where they are coming from and who is doing the selling. This is most likely to happen when he is not in LA. So, if you sell drugs and the actor is coming to town, don't be shocked if you meet him up close and in person. Harrison Ford ("Star Wars" and "Indiana Jones")

68. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#5**
This former A list teen movie actor thought he was going to be the next Joe Francis, including being a jerk to most women he meets, and loving the underage women too. He was all set to do a Girls Gone Wild franchise and filmed a party and lots of nudity and some sex scenes too. He had hired lighting people and camera people. He had sound guys running around miking people up and with booms. The thing is, the idiot forgot to get releases, forgot to ask for i.d to see how old everyone was and didn't get permission from the place he was filming. His lawyers told him he had nothing without those and he had no way of contacting anyone. So, he blew a bunch of "his money," on the project and really wants to try again but no one really wants to work with him and he also wants to be in most of the sex scenes which is not going to make anyone want to make a purchase. Corey Feldman

69. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#6**
That reality troll company that is for hire for put upon reality stars is at it again. This time they have been hired by the besieged reality star from the south to go after people who go after him in comments of tabloids and other online forums. One of these days, they will go too far and the people behind the company are going to end up in jail. Thomas Ravenel ("Southern Charm")

70. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#7**
A certain celebrity CEO has really been upping his stimulant game the past few weeks. Not just coke for him, although that is certainly the drug he enjoys the most and is using the most. Elon Musk

71. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#8**
One of the more important questions ever asked of hair and makeup people. Who has the best hair piece in the industry? Hands down, the winner is this former A list 80's television actor who was on that same hit show as the former A lister turned reality star patriarch. Apparently even today, when you see the hair piece of this actor, you can be two inches away and not realize it is fake. A gust of wind is your only hope for seeing that it is fake. Erik Estrada/Caitlyn Jenner ("CHiPs")

72. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#9**
Reader Blind Item: This still active female athlete who has had particular success in an event going on right now is the subject of a current article on a big sports site. A large part of it focuses on the injuries she sustained about a year and half ago as a result of a violent attack and her journey back to the top. As usual, details are omitted. Yes she was stabbed in the hand and the arm but the motive wasn’t robbery. Rather this was revenge by the older crime figure in her home country who financed her early career and forced her to be his mistress. She was successful in breaking away from him once she got big but this is a message to anyone else thinking of the same thing. Petra Kvitová (tennis) (Czech Republic)

73. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#10**
Apparently the cocaine budget was more than the music video budget for this foreign born A list rapper and this female A list singer. Nicki Minaj/Ariana Grande ("Bed")

74. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#11**
Is there anyone who is paying to go see this permanent A list singer in concert and thinking they are seeing her actually sing? I don't know why catching her lip syncing is such a big deal. I would rather it sound right than hear what she passes off as singing these days. Mariah Carey (opening night of Las Vegas show)

75. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#12**
This former commercial actress most of you know who is way more famous than she probably should be because of her thirst after the commercial does a lot of local yachting. She wants to do some international travel/yachting, but the word is out she has been known to make a wallet lighter while sleeping or a piece of jewelry to go missing, especially if she knows it belongs to the wife of the person she is with. She then trades it back for a ton of cash. Charlotte McKinney

76. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#13**
This foreign born former A- list model who is probably a B list actress is living with that much younger relative of hers and it is even more creepy than you can imagine. She doesn't care though. Elizabeth Hurley (nephew Miles)

77. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#14**
A long time cartoon on this children's cable channel is switching from tween/teen voice over talent to adults because of the horrific casting couch process that was going on. It is a spin off of one of the channel's most successful shows. The publicly traded company is hiding the confidential settlements in all types of crazy line items that make no sense. We are talking big numbers with the least expensive settlement amounting to $2M.
Channel: Nickelodeon
Show: "The Loud House"
Spin-off: "Los Casagrandes"

Creator: Chris Savino (fired for extensive sexual misconduct allegations)

78. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#15**
This father son combination who are the latest in a line of this last name went to a bachelor party not that long ago. The married father and the soon to be married son had their eye on the same stripper, so flipped a coin to see who would get to have sex with her. Robert F. Kennedy, Jr./Robert 'Bobby' Kennedy III

79. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#16**
How did the poison get administered? That is the question the foreign born A list celebrity wants to know. It nearly killed him. His protectors also want to know who did it because, it could easily have been one of them that was poisoned instead. The near death experience has the A lister ready to reveal a bunch of things, regardless of who it helps or hurts. That will probably lead to new attempts to kill him. John McAfee (founded the software company McAfee Associates)

80. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#17**
As valuable as she is to their company, this PR agency has sent a letter to this A list singer about her significant other and things that have come out and things that are going to come out in the next few weeks which are far worse and have asked her to make a decision between him and them. Ariana Grande/Pete Davidson

81. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/07 **#18**
Help Needed: OK. This blind item was from May. I lost my notes from it, which is not uncommon. When that happens, I usually go back and look at the comments and it triggers my memory. The thing is though, with the exception of the foreign born permanent A list model, nobody got the right answer. All I remember is that I'm pretty sure the wedding took place in France. So, maybe together we can get this figured out. I also seem to recall the wedding he busted up was something we all follow on the site. I think. So, here it is from May 15, 2018. Click on the date to read the original guesses. What do you get when you cross a business trip with a personal trip with an upcoming marriage? You get a lot of lies, broken hearts and some really messed up situations. This A+ list power broker has been in the news a lot this past week. During that crazy week, not only did he cheat on the at the time A- list mostly movie actress he was supposed to marry, he also had sex with another soon to be bride and busted up a third relationship by hooking up with an ex who was dating an at the time A- list mostly movie actor. Of course our power broker tried to hide all of this, but even he couldn't keep up with the web of lies and trail of used hotel suites he was maintaining all that weekend. The A- list mostly movie actor got back at his girlfriend by hooking up one night with this foreign born permanent A+ list model. The A- list mostly movie actress? She never recovered. It broke her heart forever.

A+ list power broker:
A- list mostly movie actress:
Another soon to be bride:
Ex who was dating an at the time A- list mostly movie actor:
Foreign born permanent A+ list model: Naomi Campbell

82. THE SUN 07/08
A CELEBRITY mum has had two of her children taken away and placed into foster care, The Sun can reveal. Sources claimed the mother, who cannot be named for legal reasons, was said to have been neglecting the youngsters while pursuing her glitzy lifestyle. Social services are understood to have intervened after a member of the public claimed they had seen her allegedly assaulting one of her children in public. Officers are then said to have uncovered a series of other problems. A judge is believed to have placed the children into care with another family close to the mum’s £1million home. It is understood both infants were regularly left to "fend for themselves" while she continued to strut the red carpet. A well-placed source said: "She has been struggling to cope recently. "They are lovely kids, very well mannered. "But she won’t give up her celebrity life to concentrate properly on them and things have all got a bit too much." The source added: "Social services got involved after she was accused of pulling her son’s hair. "Then further problems came to light." Kerry Katona; Danniella Westbrook; Katie Price

83. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#1**
The PR onslaught continues for this former A+ list tweener and this foreign born mostly television actress. This is going to turn into a Jennifer Aniston is pregnant each week type of tabloid coverage which is right up the alley of the television actress, who is seeing job offers pour in from her home country and in Europe, but I'm not sure the angle for the former tweener. Priyanka Chopra/Nick Jonas

84. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#2**
This former celebrity/former political candidate/former? stripper loving/former? threesome loving/former? cocaine addict/former boyfriend to this foreign born A- list mostly television actress is using his legal case against the actress to drum up publicity for his new movie. Nick Loeb (dated Sofía Vergara) ("Roe v. Wade")

85. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#3**
If there is a secret or rumor or anything this former manager to a permanent A list singer ever heard, she is making sure to include it in this movie. She wants to bring the whole family down and doesn't care who it hurts or if it is true as long as she makes a buck. Pat Houston (Whitney Houston)

86. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#4**
A Dancing Boy Blind Item" Which A+ list sports superstar about to be inducted into a major hall of fame, is now doing the celebrity funeral circuit? Let's just say: there was a fight, during which he happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. How do I know? Because in February, my niece's father - a trainer to players of this one sport - died suddenly. The older brother was a player himself, on the same team - that's how they all met. He's my niece's godfather. Ray Lewis (Steve McNair’s funeral) (Art Modell’s funeral) (Pro-Football Hall of Fame)

87. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#5**
This B/B- list actress who is a celebrity offspring is losing weight at a drastic pace. Apparently her celebrity significant other says he likes his girlfriends skinny so she is losing weight she can't afford to lose. At this point, skeletons weigh more. Rumer Willis/Nick Viall; Zoey Deutch/Glen Powell

88. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#6**
This former A list tweener actor turned A-/B+ list adult actor who has never really been able to break through to an above the title actor is back using again after a long break. It started with some drinking and has moved on from there. Zac Efron

89. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#7**
This married A list DJ/performer decided to be with a random group of strippers and escorts than to get on a plane for a gig a half a world away. He knows nothing will happen because he is still in demand and also that he thinks he is going to be able to keep his deposit because it will cost too much to sue him to get it back. DJ Khaled (UK’s Wireless Festival)

90. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/08 **#8**
Enjoy that celebration now because we all know it will be short lived when the drug test comes back. I'm not sure how you can go through with all the celebrations knowing what that result is going to be. He has always been the high and mighty one when it comes to this. Daniel Cormier (won HW Title)

91. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#1**
There is a buzz going on right now that the reason this A+ list singer left certain dates open in her tour later this month is to finally spend some time with her alliterate former bff prior to a big life event for the former bff. This is supposed to be a three day bash, so we shall see if they finally break bread together and do other things we want them to do together. Taylor Swift/Karlie Kloss (birthday August 3)

92. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#2**
I kind of joked about it before, but apparently this former A+ list singer turned jam band participant/late night obsession is kind of going a little overboard in his creepiness for this B/B- list actress/celebrity offspring. She is over it. John Mayer (Larry David’s daughter Cazzie David)

93. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#3**
One of the few A list members of royalty based in this country says that an impasse has been broken and that she is now receiving a much larger allowance. She said this as she picked up the check (which she never ever ever does) at dinner and said her cousin personally takes care of her now out of a "special fund." Lady Victoria Hervey

94. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#4**
With a new movie coming out and new charges coming out too, this studio decided to play a little tit for tat so to speak. If this A-/B+ list mostly television actress was willing to do the whole ignorance thing, we never knew game that so many in Hollywood do about a disgraced former A list actor, then the studio could spin that into a few more bucks for a soon to open movie and give our actress a role in an upcoming movie with a nice fat salary. Mission accomplished.
Show: "House of Cards"
Actress: Robin Wright
Actor: Kevin Spacey ("Billionaire Boys Club")

95. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#5**
This former reality star all of you know who was fired from her show but is just as well known, if not more so than anyone else remaining on the show says she was propositioned by a producer/editor for an online/on air tabloid. He told her if she would hook up with him, he would make sure their coverage going forward would always take her side. Now, our former reality star has traded photos for sex before, but she says she didn't believe the guy and when she said no, he told her she would always be a w***e and she would regret her decision. Farrah Abraham ("Teen Mom")

96. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#6**
This A- list mostly television actress who is B+ or even B when it comes to movies is someone all of you know. She was wasted drunk this weekend in the northeast where it is perfectly acceptable to be wasted drunk. Apparently though she tried to crash a stage multiple times for multiple bands because she thought the crowd wanted her to sing with the bands. Umm, nope.

97. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#7**
This former A list mostly movie actress who is a celebrity offspring does not act as much as she used to. One thing she did recently film would probably be really awkward for her if she knew that her co-star on the project (foreign born former A- list mostly television actress from a hit show turned B+ when this show got renewed) is regularly hooking up with the significant other of our former A lister.

98. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#8**
If you are doing anything shady in the word of international commerce/espionage or know some secret that could be deadly to others, here is a pro-tip. Do not go to France. Sure, there might be nerve agents in the UK, but since November of last year, there have been a good half dozen deaths in France of high profile people that never even get a cursory look or even worse, are never mentioned again after the initial news report. Go back to November when I first started talking about it and look. Now? It just so happens that a guy who knows all the same secrets as that beyond wealthy guy back in November gets killed this past week. Oh sure, they can call it what they want, but there will be no followup at all. Why do you think that our favorite former A list syndicated actress suddenly stopped living there, or at least in any fixed residence. She gave up all plans to open any kind of business there. She knows the people being killed. She has spent some one on one time with at least two, including the first to go last November. He always had a thing for her and was a long time benefactor. Pamela Anderson (Pierre Agnes)

99. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#9**
This permanent A list mostly movie actress who tried to get another Oscar a couple years ago is making another push this year. She has a movie that is being released at the end of the year and is sinking $1M of her own money just to advertise herself and is being matched by the production company and distributor. She will do whatever it takes this time to get another Oscar. Julia Roberts ("Ben is Back")

100. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#10**
There was trouble before the life event announcement. Things have not got better for this former A list tweener actress/singer turned adult actress/wannabe singer and her boyfriend. There are a lot of secrets on both sides and neither seem too concerned with working on the issues. Meanwhile, her ex has been filling the void. Hilary Duff (pregnant)/Matthew Koma/Mike Comrie

101. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#11**
Don't believe the hype. This past/present and probable future reality star from multiple reality shows all of you know is never ever ever ever however many times you want me to write it down leaving her celebrity husband/co-star. Now, could he walk away from her? Yeah, he would do that, but why should he considering he does what he wants when he wants with whom he wants and that pre-nup is super tight.

102. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#12**
Considering the reveals, none of you should be surprised about this hair challenged A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee and his fetishes. I told you about some of his sickest fetishes and his collection, so rediscovering one of his old homes and his obsessions should be old hat. What most people don't stop and think about is who his partner was at the time of the purchase and how she enjoyed playing some very rough games with all kinds of participants trying to relive the history of the house. That is probably something unexpected when you think about her. At first.
House: LaLaurie Mansion in New Orleans
Actor: Nicolas Cage (fetishes)

103. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#13**
She thinks she is going to pull a fast one, but this A list reality star with a lucrative side gig didn't do what she claimed to do. Her livelihood revolves around that not being true. Kylie Jenner (had lip filler removed)

104. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#14**
The long time on again/off again actor ex of this A-/B+ list actress/celebrity offspring went through rehab and wanted to discuss things with the actress while he was in rehab. The counselors all thought it would help him in his recovery. Our actress used several expletives when declining. Evan Peters/Emma Roberts

105. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#15**
Using a person familiar to both people, a dossier of proof of the exploits of this former actress ALL of you know was delivered. Apparently there is a ransom attached that is upwards of eight figures. I have no doubts they will follow through on their threat to put it all on a pay per view website if their demands are not met. It is incredibly damning. It also is probably why things have been kind of frosty the past few days with the married couple. Meghan Markle/Prince Harry

106. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/09 **#16**
Three Deaths: What do you do if you know you need to make sure that something makes more money in death than in life? To make sure that the spigots of money are turned on again and in a direction that is helpful. Prior to death, the money was choked off by bad spending habits and millions of dollars being paid for coverups. A few people wanted that to change and the way to do that was to get rid of anyone who knew anything or could say anything. A lifestyle of doing nothing again was within their reach, but only if these three people could be silenced. How to take care of it? Kill them? Who do you call? Someone that a permanent A list family member had slept with for ages and paid back after all of this was over by doing something very publicly and very out of character for her.

#1 - The first one was quick. It was personal. This person had deprived them of a lifestyle they had grown accustomed. It was because of this person they were cut off. In what would become a pattern, they killed him and made it look like a suicide. No note though and this is a person who most definitely would have written a note.

#2 - The thought they could buy the silence of this person and they did. The problem is that he kept coming back for more and more and it was going to be a problem. They wanted to send a message to the third one with this and they did. In public. Dead. Right there for the world to see.

#3 - This was the toughest. Well known and a good family. He was not an addict. He was not thirsty for publicity. He had a family. He had kids. He also knew too much. Way too much and could bring their dream of a life of leisure disappear. They harassed him and threatened him. They followed him and told him to cooperate. When he refused, they killed him. This time they tried to leave a suicide note but didn't have samples of his handwriting so it was garbled and made no sense. No one believes it was a suicide. They accomplished their mission though and haven't lifted a finger to this day in anything remotely resembling work.

107. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#1**
Two women are expected to come forward in the next week or two about this A/A- list singer. They each share a similar story despite living on opposite ends of the country. They were fans of the high pitched one and he invited them to a private area backstage. Each says that when they got there, they were expecting it to be more of a party but it was just the singer in a bathrobe and a bodyguard by the door who then went and stood on the other side of the door. Each said he advanced on them and forced them to have sex and each one also said to be good or else the bodyguard would take a turn too. This is a lot better behavior than he exhibits with most women who want to work with him. In that case he doesn't even talk music until after you have sex with him. No exceptions. Yes, including the A listers that have made records with him. The Weeknd (Lana Del Rey, Selena Gomez, Ariana Grande)

108. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#2**
If you ever want to know if a recent Tweet regarding a foreign born A list celebrity is correct, just go ask the recently engaged celebrity, how she got her one decent job. And how she keeps it. And what the foreign born celebrity told one of his counterparts. And why she is on that show all the time. Justin Bieber/Hailey Baldwin (engaged/pregnant) ("Drop the Mic")

109. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#3**
Apparently this foreign born permanent A list singer never found out about the four women that are on monthly retainer to her on again/off again very wealthy boyfriend. Now, his foreign born permanent A list model ex did know about them and didn't care as long as she got her own monthly retainer. Rihanna/Hassan Jameel

110. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#4**
It turns out this former A+ list mostly movie actor who dropped off the face of the earth when he started loving buffets more than acting somehow recently got a gig and got to cast the second lead female. You think he has reformed? Nope. He made this foreign born B+ list mostly movie actress hit the casting couch with him for an entire weekend. Russell Crowe/Thomasin McKenzie ("The True History of the Kelly Gang")

111. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#5**
Reader Blind Item - Old Hollywood: This comedic actor is most famous for playing the fast talking title character on this TV series from the early days of television which had a failed movie reboot in the 90's. He also was in movies including this comedy epic that starred almost all known comedic actors at the time, another film based on a popular Broadway comedy, as well as a few Disney films. Throughout his life, he struggled with a severe gambling addiction. So bad in fact both of his wives and his daughters (one did some acting herself) had to offer themselves as sexual collateral when he couldn’t pay his debts.

Actor: Phil Silvers
TV series: MSgt. Ernest G. Bilko/"The Phil Silvers Show"
Movie reboot: "Sgt. Bilko"
Comedy epic: "It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World"
Film based on Broadway comedy: "Top Banana"

112. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#6**
This not even old enough to vote B+ list mostly television actor on a pretty hit ensemble network show who is an Emmy winner/nominee posted to social media that he was having severe, potentially dangerous problems with his recent purchase. Within hours, the company got in touch with him, and made a special deal to get the post deleted. They will do anything to avoid a repeat of the debacle they experienced a couple weeks ago. Mason Cook ("Speechless")/Tesla

113. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#7**
This A- list mostly television actress from a very hit pay cable show might be married, but that was her in the bedroom of a suite, in the bed, under the covers when room service delivered some food to her lover's suite.

114. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#8**
Kindness: I am just going to leave this as it came in, because it is more powerful that way. It was the late 90s in New York City. I was a country kid in my very early 20s and hungry for adventure. I got a job in an underground club/bar with a reputation for great music. I played guitar and loved the parties, clubbing and gigs that the big city offered. I was in way over my head though and not streetwise. The long and short of it is that I was at the club one night (end of shift) where a band hailed as possibly the next big thing were playing. I guess a lot of people agreed because there were some famous musicians there that I recognized including a rock star who was one of the biggest stars on earth at the time. And a classic rocker who had been semi retired for many years but was beginning to get back in the game again. No one approached people like that when they were around, they were mainly left alone to enjoy themselves. But I had been serving them and I was kind of star struck in this case though just because of the sheer scale of the fame. I drunkenly approached and gushed at them for a while. They were quiet but polite. I still felt like I’d embarrassed myself. So that was also the night I got quite intoxicated and ended up in the car park near closing time getting violently sexually assaulted and beaten up. They never caught the guy who did it. I wouldn’t have been able to ID him if they had. I was found by a co-worker and taken inside to wait for the ambulance while I bled on the sofa in an office room. The staff were talking and the band must have said something because in walked the two celebrities I’d approached earlier and sat with me and my friend while I waited in pain and shock. The woman held my hand and the other one was in tears. They talked me through what I could expect at the hospital, that the police would be there and that they'd probably want to do a rape kit etc. I discovered later that the guy had paid for my treatment. I had been so scared of the bill. I can’t tell you what a relief that was. They checked up on me a few days later to make sure I was ok and offered help if I needed it. So when I see things on here implying the dude is predator I find it kind of hard to believe.
Band/club: "The Stokes" (CBGB’s/December 12, 1999)
Rock Star: Michael Stipe ("SNL"/December 11, 1999)
Classic rocker: Patti Smith or Debbie Harry

115. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#9**
Now this closeted foreign born permanent A+ list celebrity in every country outside North America is making bank and two hours closer to his long time boyfriend. Cristiano Ronaldo ("Juventus F.C."/Turin, Italy/Badr Hari

116. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#10**
I thought this MTV mom was finally getting her act together. Well, honestly she had been together for about the past year. Now? Hey, when you start dating your former drug dealer, how do you think that is going to work out for all involved? He has also pimped out a few women over the years in his never ending quest to make money and not pay taxes. Leah Messer/Jason Jordan

117. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#11**
Do you think this B+ list celebrity who is a celebrity offspring of someone lower on the list knows her significant other did a threesome with one of his exes and a celebrity offspring who is thisclose to the B+ list celebrity. I'm guessing no. It was several hours before the significant other got pulled over by police. Hailey Baldwin/Justin Bieber/Selena Gomez/Bella Hadid

118. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#12**
This foreign born permanent A list singer is traveling overseas. The aging closeted singer has left her lover behind and has been enjoying a young female lover provided by the company sponsoring her tour. Celine Dion

119. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#13**
This permanent A list model wins the creepy award of the week. She had a conversation with her son's girlfriend about the best way to please a man and that perhaps she should try those on her son. Christie Brinkley/Jack Brinkley-Cook/Nina Agdal; Cindy Crawford/Presley Gerber/Charlotte D'Alessio

120. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#14**
This former A+/A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee is transitioning to a woman but is not telling anyone which is how the actor got the role. No shirtless scenes probably with those hormone treatments. Mickey Rourke ("Night Walk")

121. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#15**
This B- list mostly television actress who was on a show that ended last season was hanging out with a pap yesterday. The 20 something year old actress owed the pap/drug dealer and straight up had sex with him in his car right in front of a dozen other paps.

122. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/10 **#16**
The Underage Switch: The crazy thing about all of this is that someone decided that putting out a story that this foreign born A- list mostly television actor from a very hit show dating someone barely old enough to drive was a good idea. They further had the bright idea to say the couple had been dating since she was not even close to being able to drive. Why? His people and the almost network have huge plans for the actor and they think it would be a really bad idea for him to show his true colors. They think that he will ruin the whole heartthrob image if he comes out. They think that he shouldn't be advertising the relationship he has with that A- list pro hockey player who plays in the same town where the show is filmed. His people don't think it would be a good idea to show the condo the pair share and the fact it is just a one bedroom apartment. They prefer he hide the photos of them together meeting his parents this past summer in his home country. So, someone came up with the idea that getting the world to think he is dating someone underage is way better than the truth. KJ Apa (Archie/"Riverdale")/Corinne Isherwood

123. NAUGHTY GOSSIP 07/11
Which Recently Split Actress Now Has A Girlfriend – EXCLUSIVE. While the actress and her famous husband still continue to fight over the nasty details of their divorce, she has quietly moved on and is now dating a – WOMAN! She has dated girls in the past but since getting together with her superstar man most people have forgotten about that. The once wild child is now seen more as a humanitarian, plus she now has so much money that she can fly in her secret lover on a private jet. Insiders say the relationship is new but she has a history of moving ahead very, very quickly! Before long we might see another wedding – but this one will have two brides! Angelina Jolie (Brad Pitt)

124. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#1**
There would have been a ton of questions about why this A+ list mostly movie actor was out with this 15 year old boy. Luckily the boy had a quicker reaction time. It also wouldn't shock me if we find out someone involved was the parent of the 15 year old. Lots of questions that will never be answered unless someone in the mess, decides to speak. George Clooney (scooter accident in Italy; the second scooter dodged the accident)

125. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#2**
I don't know why anyone is surprised that this A- list comedian/former failed television actor had something recently racist to say. I have been writing here for years how racist he is and lets not even forget the assaults on women in his past that people just want to try and forget because he is a "good guy," and always willing to appear on talk shows with other guys and talk about sports. Michael Rapaport (joke about soccer boys trapped in cave)

126. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#3**
Do you think the former A+ list tweener turned A/A- list adult singer knows about the reality show that two people associated with his significant other are pitching tomorrow? I bet he doesn't. The show will get a green light for sure. A big order too. Apparently they will be asking for double the episodes normally given in an order and are asking for salaries for what you would expect from a fifth or sixth year reality show for the first season. Not a big amount for the former A+ lister but would be a ton of money to the significant other. Justin Bieber/Hailey Baldwin’s parents Stephen and Kennya Baldwin

127. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#4**
If you were in the Hamptons this weekend, and really, who among us was not in the Hamptons this weekend? OK, I wasn't. I'm guessing you weren't. But if you were, you may have seen this one season reality wonder who reminds you of that biennial sporting event whenever her name pops up in the mainstream. What was she doing you ask? Spending her very early evening/late afternoon hours doing some lines of coke with someone very nearby. Who was that? That always hanger on to the reality family who has a secret we all want him to just announce so we can move on with out lives and not have to think about him again. Corinne Olympios ("Bachelor in Paradise")/Jonathan Cheban (admit he’s gay)

128. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#5**
There was one person who was not happy for that engagement announcement this week. This A+ list singer. She did her staged photos and has learned enough to make the pap stand slightly further back to make them look as if they possibly were not staged. They still were, but she tried. She had her forest like publicist leak a bunch of great sounding quotes that were super generic and banal, but would normally sell. No word on who exactly holds a beer bottle that way, but I digress. That former A+ lister our current A+ lister hates with a passion stole every single bit of her thunder though and the vanilla staged relationship is headed to the meh pile even though the A+ lister did what she has only ever done once in her life in a photo. Worn a bikini and showed her belly button. The unknown she snatched straight from drama school to her casting call interests no one.
A+ list singer: Taylor Swift (Joe Alwyn)
Former A+ lister our current A+ lister hates with a passion: Justin Bieber (announced engagement to Hailey Baldwin) (Taylor hates Justin because of the way he treated Selena Gomez)

129. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#6**
Stop me if you have heard this before but the reason this news making couple are splitting is because he is sleeping with the nanny. Not their nanny, but the nanny of one of their best friends. Christiane Amanpour/James Rubin

130. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#7**
This former A+ list athlete turned mostly professional bust started off a new career as a bust. Then, someone gave him a little something and now he is a big success and the fix is in when it comes to his success. The powers that be want him to succeed so turn their head to what they know is the secret. Tim Tebow ( Adderall)

131. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#8**
Apparently as a reward for contributing so much money and for bringing so much attention to the cause, this closeted A list mostly television actress from a very hit almost television show will be allowed to live with her long time girlfriend and will not be forced to get a beard. As part of the deal, she won't have to even pretend she is dating men or answer any boyfriend questions or any other ridiculous love life question. Elisabeth Moss ("Handmaid’s Tale") (Scientology)

132. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#9**
The girlfriend of this closeted foreign born permanent A list singer must have read the blinds yesterday about the young model supplied to the singer while on tour because she had a social media meltdown beginning right after the post was published. Celine Dion’s girlfriend

133. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#10**
This A- list reality star is using his significant other as bait for his customers. No, he is not sharing her but all the teenage females who want to meet the significant other are being persuaded to hook up with men for money while out of the country. Scott Disick/Sofia Richie

134. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#11**
Our favorite alliterate B+ list actress recently broke up with a married man who told her he was single. They had been dating for six months before she got a call from his wife. January Jones

135. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#12**
This former A list mostly movie actress from back in the day who had a series of high profile romances before dropping down the list like a rock was caught smoking a rock behind a grocery store in West Hollywood recently. She got a warning when the police officer recognized her which had to be a first in a long time. Lara Flynn Boyle

136. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#13**
She got in, but this foreign born former A- list singer turned B list wannabe singer again was an unknown to the foreign born permanent A list rapper/singer when she introduced herself to him. She assumed he had made sure she was invited and was crushed he didn't know who she was. Lily Allen/Drake

137. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#14**
That sugarmama thing this former A+ list mostly movie actress turned never really acts but has A+ list name recognition thing didn't work out exactly the way she planned. She had been paying him a lot, but apparently it still wasn't enough. Demi Moore (David Matthew Read stole credit card)

138. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#15**
Their ruse failed. It failed spectacularly. When you have family members from the other side exposing how fake the relationship is with the A list reality star and her fake boyfriend, things have gone really wrong. Look for another new entrant soon to this attempt to created what will never be. Kendall Jenner/Ben Simmons

139. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/11 **#16**
A Sordid History: You won't see any of this on that online tabloid site that normally would be all over this. They have been instructed by their higher up corporate bosses to stay quiet. If they get a chance, they can say something bad about any of the accusers. So far, they have not had a chance, but with several outstanding claims still to be settled, the corporation would love nothing more than to find some dirt on the people filing claims and have them splashed online. There was a fairly popular cable show that this actor was headed for a promotion to series regular. Instead, he was fired. Reason? When he cornered an actress on the show and when she tried to resist his advances had her clothes torn from her body. Literally the dress was shredded and the bra torn in half. His explanation was that she had been teasing and flirting with him and wanted him but was playing hard to get. He knew she liked it rough and was just showing her she did. Fast forward a year or two and our actor had another chance at promotion to series regular on a network hit. There was the extra he beat up because he felt the extra was making a move on a female extra that he was sure wanted to sleep with the actor. This was not his first incident on that show. Other female extras had complained he pressured women each week to have sex with him. If they didn't, he would harass them until they wanted to quit. The firing he is most famous for though involved well over two dozen complaints including some that the company has paid out well over a million bucks to settle. Apparently the married actor felt like he was the boss and everyone worked for him or was there to serve his bidding. If you were a woman then you obviously wanted to sleep with him and if you didn't, he made your life crap. If you didn't do what he wanted and show him deference, he would make your life miserable. Violence was his number one method of it. There is not one person he has worked with in his last few jobs that has anything nice to say about him, but no one said anything to anyone else at any other show so he just moved from show to movie to show spreading disaster in his wake.
Actor: Clayne Crawford
Cable show: "The Glades" (A&E)
Network hit: "NCIS: New Orleans"
Famous firing: "Lethal Weapon"

140. POPBITCH 07/12
Disney has long been accused of trying to force a liberal agenda and turn our kids gay – but seeing the stories currently being touted around about yet another of their '00s tween stars having an illicit lesbian lover, we have to wonder: is there maybe something in it?
Demi Lovato

141. TAMARA TATTLES 07/12
There are so many pregnancy stories around and two of then involve Vanderpump Rules and Vanderpump adjacent people. One is a person on the show. The other is Vanderpump adjacent. Both are pregnant. Katie Maloney (husband Tom Schwartz) & Lisa Vanderpump’s daughter Pandora Todd

142. MIRA SORVINO 07/12
Hollywood Reporter podcast: Mira Sorvino, one of Harvey Weinstein's many accusers and a leading voice in Hollywood's #MeToo movement against sexual harassment, claimed in a new interview that she fell victim to the inappropriate behavior of another notable figure in entertainment. During a recent interview with the Hollywood Foreign Press Association for its HFPA in Conversation podcast, the actress recounted an uncomfortable audition in which a director made a sexually charged comment that left her speechless. According to Sorvino, the Oscar-winning director — whom she didn't name but said that he is "known for his social justice profile" — told her during the final round of auditions for one of his films, "You know, as I look at you my mind can't help traveling from the artistic possibilities to the sexual." "I think my mouth just opened, and my silence was deafening," Sorvino said of her reaction to the director's comment, adding that other actresses had previously warned her. "You're going to absolutely have to have sex with all kinds of people to advance your career." Sorvino went on to say that she believes she didn't get the part in the movie because of her reaction to the director's remark. The Hollywood Reporter has reached out to Sorvino's reps for further comment.

143. NAUGHTY GOSSIP 07/12
Which of Bravo’s Housewives Is Going Broke Being on The Show? EXCLUSIVE. This Real Housewife is spending so much money on the show pretending to be way more fabulous than she really is, that she is going secretly broke! She loves the spotlight and has fooled everyone into thinking she is super successful in her career off camera. But in reality, she hasn’t had a real job in years and is living off family money. To keep up an image on the show she has spent a fortune on clothes and living large. At this point she is spending way more money on pretending to be someone amazing than she earns being a real housewife! SNAP!
Luann de Lesseps ("Real Housewives of New York City")

144. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#1**
This B+ list rapper/convicted child molester thinks he is going to face just an assault charge. Nope. He is about to get hit with multiple sexual assault and rape charges, many involving minors which will keep him locked up a long time if convicted. 6ix9ine

145. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#2**
This former B+ list mostly television actress has known for sometime she could not get pregnant in the traditional manner. Apparently when she went to a fertility doctor with an ex, they also told her she might not even get pregnant via IVF. Hey, good for them there is someone close to her foreign born husband who knows all about surrogates. Meghan Markle/Kate Middleton

146. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#3**
This former B- list reality star/model should be grateful that no one knows she is the one who supplied the drugs that killed a man and that she watched him die without bothering to call for help until it was too late. Ooops. They know now don't they. Shannade Clermont

147. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#4**
This A- list mostly movie actor who has multiple franchises that are hits and another that was a big bomb left his girlfriend back at a hotel spa while they were on vacation so he could hook up with a woman. He then let her sit at dinner alone for 90 minutes while he hooked up with another woman before finally showing up. The girlfriend says she understands and is supportive. Come on.

148. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#5**
This foreign born A- list dual threat actor who some say might not return as his character in the superhero world is talking smack about the A+ lister who he once called his girlfriend. He has a group chat going with several people and is filled with memes about her battle pans and freeing her boyfriend. Tom Hiddleston/Taylor Swift/Joe Alwyn

149. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#6**
This fired reality star from the long running/far reaching franchise thinks the cable network is going to give her a show. Nope. Plus, they believe that by the time her non-compete ends, no one will want her. The network is treating the year as kind of an informal suspension. If, after the year, they think she is worth another chance they will be able to get her at half the price and lock her in to a long term deal with very punitive terms which is how they like to do business. Kenya Moore ("Real Housewives of Atlanta")

150. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#7**
There sure is a lot of buzzing about what this foreign born A- list mostly movie actor/superhero had to say about the MeToo movement. I didn't see this kind of uproar when he was hooking up with high school age kids right in front of everyone. I didn't see this kind of uproar after he and this A- list mostly television actress from a hit network show split because of what he wanted her to do or what he made that long time celebrity girlfriend do. Henry Cavill (Kaley Cuoco) (Gina Carano)

151. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#8**
What happens when you decide to leak some information about the wife of one of the biggest drug dealers/killers ever and the wife's celebrity helper/money launderer? Well, considering I had not heard from her in months when she said she thought she was being spied on by someone, and now she ended up dead, I guess that is what happens when you get caught. Someone needs to pay. Joaquin 'El Chapo' Guzman’s wife Emma Coronel Aispuro/Huma Abedin (Anthony Weiner’s wife)

152. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#9**
This A- list mostly movie actor from an acting family apparently likes to roleplay with his actress girlfriend. He likes her to pretend she is in middle school. Casey Affleck and Floriana Lima

153. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#10**
This foreign born A- list mostly movie actress is doing the Europe premiere a night thing for her new movie. She thought her foreign born A- list actor boyfriend would go with her. Nope. He is taking advantage of the time apart to rekindle with an ex and a college student he met at a Nando's. Lily James ("Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again")/Matt Smith

154. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#11**
There have been two different size increases in the wardrobe in just a few weeks of this A- list mostly television actress who is the lead on a hit network show that has been airing for awhile now. The actress, came back from break about fifteen pounds heavier than when they wrapped last season and has already gained another five since shooting began. Chrissy Metz ("This Is Us")

155. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#12**
This permanent A list comic who many of you might not think of as a comic is also a former A list actor/host from multiple hit network shows who is now probably A-/B+ listish. He has always had his own brand of comedy, but sometimes he takes it to reality. He was overheard rating women by how many Viagra he would need to take to be able to sleep with them. Bob Saget (Premiere Of truTV's "Bobcat Goldthwait's Misfits & Monsters")

156. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#13**
This former A+ list singer turned A- list singer/hopeful actress is basically a zombie at this point with all the pills and other self-medication. She is a shell of her old self. Lady Gaga

157. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#14**
This former Vampire Diaries actress told a fan to "f**k off," when they wanted her to sign a Vampire Dairies poster. Nice. Not Nina who will sign all day long to anyone who comes up to her. Kat Graham

158. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#15**
This foreign born still one hit wonder is hooking up with this married talk show host. Iggy Azalea

159. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#16**
Back to the really hard stuff again for this B+ list dual threat actor who has name recognition much higher than where he is on the list. Just went from sober to full on addict in such a short amount of time. Jonathan Rhys Meyers (a drunken and violent outburst on a flight)

160. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#17**
This foreign born A-/B+ list three named actor was throwing back drinks at The Three Clubs this week, so he might be getting help for anger, but he does not seem to be getting help for his drinking. Jonathan Rhys Meyers (a drunken and violent outburst on a flight)

161. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/12 **#18**
So Crazy It Might Be True: Back in the day I would sometimes post stories directly from readers that I thought were a bit out there so to speak. This one might take the cake. The thing is though, over their two part missive to me, a LOT of the things that I could actually check out did check out. The problem I have is that it would be impossible to make descriptions for some of these people because they are obscure celebrities. That being said, this was all brought on because of what the reader knows about this former A+ list mostly movie actor who was that high when he was a child and was the highest paid child actor in the world at the time. Now? He lives on the interest and residuals from those days. See what you can make of all of this. The first part actually came with evidence, but if I give it to you now, there will be nothing to guess. actually came with evidence, but if I give it to you now, there will be nothing to guess.

I need your prayers, empathy, perspective and professional opinion - or referral to the right person who is at liberty to have an open discussion... You appear to know where some if not all of the socio-narcopathic bodies are buried in my emotional crypt. My sister is surrounded by people who are pedosexuals - from her time as a child star - and her mother normalizes and buries my own abuse and has for 40 years. She was instrumental in trying to erase me fro mmy father's legacy. When he died they did not even tell me and were outraged I went to his funeral to say goodbye. They use the results of their betrayal to justify it, naturally. But I spent about 35 years now trying to find out if _______ was on Team Decent Human Being or Team Narcissitc Family Abuse Subject Matter Expert. This - my issues - are complicated because I married a monster that was their fused insane narcopath and I seriously think he lost his motherfucking mind when he walked into that chapel and I had been there for an hour and did not speak to him AT ALL. _________'s aunt, step-father, husband, mother, herself all had this Hypocrisy Parade to say I had every right to be there, blah blah blah - though they had not picked up the phone and have not since - and she comes up and hugs me and I thought to myself - this is not for me - it's for her - and them. I did not ask them to say one word and no one else who knows about this did either. I think my father, I hope anyway - I don't know. I am just wretchedly sad. I think when I discovered you in June because I have never heard of you in my life... and I saw all that stuff about ________, _________, __________ and, me - I have a very severe case of premeditated percepticide. I had joined this secret pedophile hunters group and they said to me in there that she HAD to have been abused too - mine was not like a rape thing either it was more like a denial thing and you bleed to much about it anyway thing. I think. i LOVED them, they have never loved me. Ever. So, I am not quite sure yet? But it looks like they may have disowned and disinherited me and now I've made that embarassing and difficult... because that's how I roll with the motherfucking pedosexual objectifying normalizing folks. ________ did something really nasty to me about using my husband that works at a fancy ___________ jewelry store on the UES - ________ duped ________ - and trust me - he never saw her coming and if I went around telling anyone who would listen what a toxic soup she is? I would get called worse than I already do - so I just said "I don't think that is a very good idea honey. I had to practically worship Oprah Winfrey to let go of wishing she would die...by spontaneous combustion." Funny, it's not quite back yet? But fucking close. Ommmmmm my gawd. LOL So _______ makes this custom pendant for ________, and I pay for the gold and diamonds - and by this time I am about 3 years into a nightmare custody battle because why? My ex-husband was leaving my kids with my dad and his third wife and he was making red satin thong jokes in front of her and it made me crazy. Really awkward and uncomfortable, and I swear I never set a boundary in my life that they did not nuke on the spot and put me in my spot. He makes her a custom guitar too. He never finsihed my wedding ring or my guitar. I felt like - he married me to be near her. And when I left he stripped me bare of everything and I JUST got approved for foodstamps and medicare in the last 10 days. I am no perfect angel but I was 14 when this shit storm started brewing. I have a serious health condition and my ex-husband it turns out? My father knew he had assaulted me and colluded with him and my mother to take my kids because I "destroyed him" for telling what happened to me. #MeToo highlighted Woody Allen right? Did you know that the Responsible Fatherhood Initiative FUNDS THAT SHIT for them? I have all the documentation and _____ and _______ know and have since at least 2010. I was determined to survive this? But helping others. Can you fucking imagine my spaghettin head when I saw your stuff on _________? My father told me he believed that _________ had an affair with him behind ________'s back and when I saw this article below I thought she has no loyalty at all - ever - that was her distancing herself from him because - well that's what a narcissistic discard IS. Enty? My mother makes _______ look like a fucking saint. Anyway, _________ takes the pendant and does this - And the proof was what was listed below, but we will save that for a special reveal day. Now, here is part two. I read that and it barely makes sense. I am sorry, it's hard to share it with a stranger and trust the universe too. But I see you know the nature of the beast and expose it too. I need to back up a bit. I have been living a true life Gaslight at least, and much more openly since 1976. This is the condensed version: I was a precocious neglected, abused child. Born 1962 to two teenagers. My mother ____________, then, groomed me using ___________'s two volume anthology of adult female sexual fantasy in the early 1970s between 1974 and 1976 towards her neoliberal model of feminism. My mother has never disclosed her own sexual abuse issues, but her mother was married to a man 41 years her senior when she was barely 18 years old. My mother harped on my mission to correct this hillbilly legacy rooted in the coal mines of the Ozark mountains for as long as I can remember. My father was deeply ashamed of failing his own future by impregnating this beautiful social pariah in the back of a Dodge, but his parents stuck by him and he completed his education. His adolesence was interutpted and he was called _______, __________ and "the world's oldest teenager" but my father drowned his sorrows and needed to prove his sexual prowess intensely so that plus the 1970s collided to create a bizarre home. My parents entered into an agreement to have an open, swinging, lifestyle. But it did not quite go as my father hoped. My mother would not perform in front of him and reframed her sexual freedom in the form of an apartment on campus about a block from a disco where my father was the local John Travolta. A year before my parents split up, in November 1976, my father came home blind drunk in a blackout. Ordinarily they were just never there at all, but this night he was home early, and completely trashed. I had never seen him this incapacitated but I don't judge and just do what I must. I helped him from the front door, bathroom where he undressed and showered on his own. He was having trouble getting to the bed and I worried he would get hurt. He flopped onto his bed damp and it was very cold, so I leaned over to cover him up, like a taco inside their comforter, he thought I was my mom, reached up, kissed me and touched my breast to kiss her good night and passed out cold. I freaked the fuck out inside. I did not say anything for 4 months until March 1977. But was angry, and hurt and confused and there was quite a lot of this going on in other homes and my girlfriends and I discussed it at the lunchtable at school. That had beenthe case prior to this, and of course I told them too. To my father "this" is the problem. Not that he was drunk enough to have this be told ever, at all, but that I as his daughter was hurt and confused and could not possibly contextualize any of this. He always saw himself like an adult in relationship to being an early father. He did not understand that at 14, despite the responsibilities and autonomy I was granted that I was far too young to embrace them. When I did confront him and my mother... Everything was very upsetting to me and to them. They dispatched it as soon as they could and to them this is where the story begins and ends, and I just should never have perpetuated this problem or "allowed" it to destroy me. So they started trying to make this about one 60 second incident. It was not rape, it was the crescendo to an ambient sexualization, an objectiffication and normalization of it, for over a decade. I was still a child. But you seem to be the one guy in the entertainment industry that understands that Lolita as an icon has an underlying agenda and my father was attracted to a woman that was tormented and twisted about pedosexuality for reasons I will never know. But it is deeply embedded in her ancestry. My failure to escape her fate and generations of mothers behind us, is her indictment. Her self indictment. She hates me for this, he hates me for this. But they also feel guilty and loved me once, despite my inconvenience. They divorce. I accept their explanations socially but the pretense eats me inside for decades and Dad compounds this. I feel the lie of it. Cryptographic clues are just pervasive. He secretly betrays me a million times and hates me for it calling me out for being like an adult, uncontrollable, and the interior is awful to his exterior. My mother is complicit and finally emails the truth for months ago. Enter ___________ age 24 and sister to (a pageant queen/big one) _______________, of whom she is very jealous. In fact, according to __________, she is fully to credit as the Svengali of her sister. My mother was more likely to "burn her bra" (no one actually ever burned their bra, I knew these activists in NYC the last decade, and heard their stories first hand). She ridiculed the likes of ________ and they were strange creatures to me. _________ was on the board of the pageants and after she and Dad married the precursor to the set of the 1991 off Broadway show __________ was created. When I walked down the aisle seeing it, my sense of surreality was just fused into a permanent "Can this fucking be happening? to ME?" I had a little bit of it in the audience of the _____________ and __________ Miss ________ Pageant Too - that ________ had founded and ran. When JonBenet Ramsey was murdered ________ had pictures and trophies exactly, precisely like that too. It actually makes me nauseous to contemplate what they allege. This is where that criminal psychologist's analysis of this conduct becomes emotionally threatening to me, I have not watched _______________'s analysis yet, but I did watch the "Killer in the Family" last week and that is a little too close to my own post divorce/custody battle with my first husband. I assert he is conducting a slow murder - and my reason for disclosing to YOU? Is ____. By this point in the story Enty? ________ has moved __________ to NYC and she is working the child to the bone in advertising, commercials, Radio City, sitcom;s... but like my mother she is an expert at Parental Alienation and manipulation. She is diabolic in her need for competition and greed. My mother is diabolic in her sense of retaliation too. And _____, wife number 3, I used to like a lot, but she is either just as greedy and diabolic or simply defending my father's version of his truth. I can't know - but her demeanor changed after the marriage so much, I felt she was cut from the same cloth. _______ would exclude me from all family events, pictures, mentions in articles, thwarted my father contributing financially to my wedding, and even refused to have a celebration with ______ on her birthday that day. I became Jewish after a quandry about the significance of why it mattered who begat whom and a long 12 step recovery from drowning/drugging my little nightmare, and converted to Judaism in 1994. My husband ___ was a bit of a trouble maker, errant Orthodox boy, and his mother likened me to Monica Lewinski. I was in a way I guess in that I needed love but did not know it. As I matured I understood the lies better. ________ had been currying favor to advance ______'s fame and fortune. I see how my concerns dovetail ____________. You must. How do I verify and quantify my concerns?

162. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#1**
This very large married actor is probably A- list. Still waiting on the huge box office popcorn superhero movie to be released to take him completely away from the television character that made him famous, he continues to constantly cheat on his wife. Apparently he also has no problems with the person he is cheating on also being married or having a boyfriend which is causing issues. Jason Momoa (Lisa Bonet) ("Aquaman") (Khal Drogo "Game of Thrones")

163. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#2**
This now former head of a very large company is about to have a bad week made worse. That coed he has been hooking up with the past few months has video of him using coke, and also video of him doing lines off the naked breasts of a different coed. John Schnatter ("Papa John’s")

164. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#3**
This former A list comedian/full-time a-hole recently brought forward his girlfriend to the world even though they started hooking up when she was not quite legal. Dane Cook/Kelsi Taylor

165. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#4**
This A- list mostly television actress from a fairly hit network show has her management team up in arms because of some of the recent decisions she has made in her personal life. Already people are doing something they have never done before in her career which is hating on her. She also lost out on a film role which was a big deal because the studio didn't want to deal with the questions of hiring her now. Chloe Bennet/"Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." (changed her Chinese last name because "Hollywood Is Racist") (dating YouTuber Logan Paul/his trip to Japan’s Aokigahara forest, colloquially known as the "suicide forest," where he filmed an apparent suicide victim)

166. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#5**
This probable permanent A list singer/network reality star can say what she likes about her ticket sales, but the fact is, the owner of the establishment is comping them like crazy just to get the place to even look like it is close to capacity. People are being begged to go. Gwen Stefani (Las Vegas residency)

167. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#6**
I lose count because there are so many marriages, but I believe this is now two of the past four marriages in this reality family have been shotgun weddings which they go to great lengths to cover up, yet they still won't let my one and only favorite get married to the guy she loves because he has been married before. That is messed up. Josiah Duggar/Lauren Swanson (favorite: Jana)

168. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#7**
After the third night of getting blindingly drunk, this former A/A- list mostly movie actress with a former franchise finally agreed to get a night nurse for her infant. You can tell who did the hiring for the night nurse because she looks like a night nurse you would cast if your significant other was going to end up cheating with them, and probably not in a Hand That Rocks The Cradle way, which if you have never seen, you should. Kirsten Dunst ("Spiderman") (Jesse Plemons)

169. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#8**
Remember that little break that this permanent A list musician/frequent reality star had with this A- list mostly television actress? It probably lasted a couple months or so before they finally put the finishing touches on their agreement relationship. Apparently there is a woman claiming that our musician got her pregnant and she is very close to delivering their baby. David Foster/Katharine McPhee

170. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#9**
This foreign born A- list mostly television actor who currently stars on a hit pay cable show is someone all of you know and love. He was partying last night and definitely has gained a few pounds since he was last spotted. Anyway, the now pot belly bearing actor was not with the woman he has been seeing but was definitely enjoying the company of a fellow concert goer who seemed to be enjoying the taste of his tongue. Joshua Jackson/Alyssa Julya Smith

171. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#10**
This A+ list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award winner/nominee recently threatened to kill the significant other of an actor ex.

172. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#11**
I have written about this A list country singer before and how she split with her most recent boyfriend aka serial cheater like the singer. I wrote about how he went back to his wife, but apparently our singer bought him a car so he came running back. I'm sure this relationship won't have any issues at all. Miranda Lambert/Evan Felker (estranged wife Staci Nelson)

173. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#12**
This A list televangelist recently had a cruise for his ministry. Apparently it was just an excuse for him to have one on one meetings with his female parishioners that always involved them getting naked. T. D. Jakes (or take your pic
k)

174. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#13**
I have written before about this permanent A list couple and their uterus factory. Apparently, in the past week, they cut some type of deal while overseas that gives them a "license" to continue doing this without fear of any prosecution. Beyoncé/Jay Z

175. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#14**
The most recent celebrity ex of this A list singer who dumped him hard, tried to kill himself last week.

176. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/13 **#15**
This former A list basketball player is fast running out of money so wants to make his dollar and escort budget stretch further so he is leaving the country. My prediction is if he stays in the country, he will be dead within a year. Lamar Odom (China)

177. TAMARA TATTLES 07/14
You really have to take this big reality participant’s words with a grain (or perhaps a pound) of salt. My issue is not that she is the face of a recently relocated retail store because they could not afford the rent. My problem is that she pretends it is her store. I admit actually liking the merchandise quite a bit, but the deal she has is either a small percentage of profits and/or a payment for advertising the shop. The straw that broke the camel’s back for me was when her cast mates were acting as if she had opened a new store. As my spies tell it. It is a postage stamp size pop up shop for the summer. Many other people on her series have done pop up shops, mostly of their own personal clothes, this pop shop appears to be overstock from the brick and mortar shop she is the face of. So once again, this reality show personality will make some money for drawing attention to the pop up, but it is in fact just another pop up. She’s not in the retail business, or the online business. It won’t make a dent in her wallet. It is pocket change. I honestly don’t know why she bothers with this shit unless she is actually trying to help a friend, because she has a Most Favored Nation clause in her contract and is paid just a smidge under$100K per episode for her reality show. She should be set for life, but she needs an accountant who makes sure she pays her taxes. And she needs to watch her spending and pay off her debts. The bottom line is she has yet to open a store. Not a boutique, not a carpet store, not a furniture store, not a store in Atlantic City. This person does not own a store anywhere. NeNe Leakes ("Real Housewives of Atlanta") (Swagg Boutique)

178. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#1**
This convicted child molester of his former celebrity clients and all around dirt bag is online again trying to sell interviews and autographs. For $100 he will sign photos of him standing next to one of the teen actors he molested. Marty Weiss ("An Open Secret")

179. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#2**
This former A+ list rapper not named Kanye but who once had a beef with Kanye really should be careful going up against the talk show host who knows all. She came thisclose to outing you the other day and if you keep pushing she will also make sure that everyone has the info about you and the underage boys too. 50 Cent/Wendy Williams

180. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#3**
A massive effort is being brought to bear on this A+ list mostly movie actor to recommit to the church and to do a massive ad campaign for it too because there are cracks beginning to show in the scam. The thing the church is most worried about is a bunch of the recruited teens and college students talking about what they had to do for rich church members to get them to join and stay and keep writing those checks. It is very possible that once one person talks the whole church and its matchsticks foundation will come crumbling down. Chris Pratt ("Hillsong Church")

181. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#4**
Despite the horror of the box office numbers that was this reboot of an old franchise, there is talk that Netflix wants to do another movie followed by a television show. Their first choice is to stay away from the foreign born A- list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award winner/nominee. The problem they face is she gets paid for a sequel regardless if she is in it or not. As long as she does not drop out, she gets paid. Alicia Vikander ("Tomb Raider")

182. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#5**
This former A- list celebrity turned A- list reality star turned really poor decisions when it comes to men celebrity had her assistant adopt 10 different cats from 6 different shelters over the past month. Our former reality star is allergic to cats. She has been doing some freaky stuff as of late and I hope this is not part of it. At this point, she is so far gone though, it wouldn't shock me. She is just fully on board for the ride her significant other is taking her on. Kat Von D (Rafael Reyes) (house fire that killed her hairless cat)

183. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#6**
Not only has this former A/A- list mostly movie actor not been fired, the A list director of the movie in which the actor is performing had a stripper delivered to the trailer of the actor wearing nothing but a bow. Emile Hirsch/Quentin Tarantino ("Once Upon a Time in Hollywood")

184. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#7**
This website owner I have written about before who is married to an A- list celebrity is cheating on her again. He treats her like absolute crap and is just using her for her name and she doesn't seem to care. Alexis Ohanian (Reddit)/Serena Williams

185. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#8**
In front of at least three other people, this B list celebrity offspring of someone lower on the list than the offspring suggested she and her A list boyfriend make a sex tape because "it would make everyone crazy." They already have a "friend" who takes their picture when the couple is in bed together or naked to have a record for the future. This is getting strange. Hailey Baldwin/Justin Beiber

186. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/14 **#9**
This foreign born former A+ list celebrity in her own country who got some fame here with a sex tape is still A/A- list in her own country and is probably C+ list here. She is in danger of losing all her children if her coke use becomes known. She had given it up several boyfriends/kids ago, but is now back on. Katie Price

187. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#1**
This A list celebrity, who doesn’t work much anymore, is very heavy on the political activism scene these days. This celebrity, and many others, recently began to openly boycott & oppose a high profile company’s products - due to a donation they found highly objectionable. Elon Musk (donation to Republican Super Pac)

188. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#2**
This foreign born B+ list mostly movie actress has been putting the squeeze on her A- list mostly movie actor boyfriend to make things serious. She wants public love and engagement and marriage. Our actor doesn't really want anything serious and backs off when she mentions it. This causes her to unfollow him and stop talking to him. Then, surprise surprise he misses hooking up with her and sweet talks her back and says he is willing to be serious. She takes him back and after a few weeks when she is expecting something serious again, the whole scenario plays out all over again. Eliza Gonzalez/Josh Duhamel

189. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#3**
How do you make the rest of the cast look the same height as this vertically challenged permanent A list mostly movie actor? Put them on a platform so people have to look up to see them all. Nice idea. Throw those platform supports in the shoes and it works pretty well. Tom Cruise

190. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#4**
Another day and another vulture coming out of the woodwork to try and shake down the estate of this foreign born permanent A list singer. The idea is to just cause as much trouble as possible and be enough of a nuisance where someone just cuts them a check for $1M if they can get it. My guess is they will get something in the very low six figures. They have no chance of winning, but it is more about weighing how much it will cost to prove that against just cutting that check. George Michael (Kenny Goss and Fadi Fawaz)

191. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#5**
Of course the rapper who is the convicted child molester/rapist went on the lookout for some teenage girls. He found them too. Parents were practically giving him their daughters which was just outrageous. I don't understand, but I guess the money he was passing out to them was one of the reasons. He took two of them back to his hotel with him. 6ix9ine

192. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#6**
This alliterate A- list mostly television actress from a hit network show almost got replaced this season with someone younger. If the show continues beyond this season, it will happen.

193. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#7**
This now disgraced former A+ YouTube star is dealing some drugs to help ends meet. That would probably cap off a really bad decision year for him. Logan Paul

194. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#8**
I am kind of in awe at how she does it, but this A-/B+ list mostly television actress all of you know who has had other, umm, more unusual gigs while also acting managed to talk producers out of about $20K to buy clothes for the press of her new show. She then pocketed the money and used clothes she got for free from designers. Olivia Munn ("The Rook")

195. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#9**
This foreign born C+ list celebrity who is married to a foreign born B+ list celebrity who is way down the list compared to another family member raped a waitress at a gambling club after a night out. The guy is a terror. The crazy thing is he will probably never go to jail or face any consequences so he will just keep on doing it. James Matthews (British former professional racing driver, hedge fund manager, and heir to the Scottish feudal title of Laird of Glen Affric0/Pippa Middleton (sister of Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge)

196. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/15 **#10**
This permanent A+ list rapper/Hall Of Fame pot smoker cheats on his wife all the time. I think we all knew that. The thing is though, there is a wannabe reality star who is so thirsty for fame she manufactures text messages to try and get on a show and is taking him down with her. The sad fact is that she probably has done enough now to get that reality show. Snoop Dogg/Celina Powell

197. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#1**
Unlike the other cast member from this network reality show that made a sex tape, this person actually won the competition. This person also apparently did it in return for money to buy drugs.

198. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#2**
In an effort to propel him higher in the ranks and give him a shot at the top level, this closeted A list name recognition athlete got the media to show off his new beard. For her part, I don't think the beard has any idea she is a beard or what is going on. Would love a reporter to ask her questions about the relationship. I bet she says they are just friends. Tim Tebow ("Miss Universe" Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters)

199. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#3**
This foreign born B list mostly television actress from a hit almost network show might want to slow her roll declaring her love for her new boyfriend. While she is off filming, he has multiple women he sleeps with each week in the town where he is based and usually picks up different women in the cities where he travels to. The actress just has no idea. Vanessa Morgan ("Riverdale")/Michael Kopech (Chicago White Sox pitcher) (Brielle Biermann’s ex)

200. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#4**
This former A+ list politician who has gone for it all in the past and come up short had a lot of different jobs during his career. The married politician has been having a fling with a woman who is about half the age of his youngest child. The crazy thing is he is seriously thinking of leaving his wife for the new woman and thinks everyone will understand. Newt Gingrich

201. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#5**
This foreign born former A+ list athlete who might not be an athlete again unless the price is right has a significant other. He supposedly loves her and he might, but this past week he threw money at two strippers/escorts as he made them do more and more degrading things for money while he laughed and called them some very nasty names. Conor McGregor/Dee Devlin

202. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#6**
This foreign born B- list celebrity from a very A+ list celebrity family who made brief waves in the last couple months vaulting her to a 24 hour window of A lister-ness is hooking up with a much older, much heavier, much more hairy Formula One type owner who has cast aside his already young significant other to be with the celebrity. Lady Amelia Windsor or Lady Kitty Spencer/Flavio Briatore

203. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#7**
Apparently this former A+ list singer who likes underage sex and molesting young girls has gone from just renting his projects for an hour or a day to outright selling them which is what he recently did for a rapper. The price was $250K with a promise she would never leave him no matter what the rapper did to her. Why is no one stopping this? It isn't like it hasn't been reported to authorities. It is crazy this is being allowed to continue. R. Kelly

204. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#8**
This former A list mostly movie actress is out promoting a huge box office bomb of a movie which will probably not do wonders for her movie career. She talks a lot about certain things, but leaves out two very important things because she does want a career again. She has not spoken out at all about the disgraced writer/director who forced her to have sex for roles more than once. He also forced her to have sex scenes he cut but then showed to actor/director/producer friends who would then call her in to read for roles where they often tried to force her to have sex with them. She is also not discussing the former A+ lister who verbally and emotionally abused her for years and caused an equal amount of years in therapy. She has to stay silent if she wants to keep the career revival going.

Actress: Neve Campbell
Movie: "Skyscraper"
Writer/director: James Toback
Former A+ lister: John Cusack

205. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#9**
This foreign born A- list dual threat actor thinks women should just look pretty on screen and have nothing to do with anything behind the scenes which he considers the sole domain of men. Apparently his foreign born actress wife has never tried to change his mind. Daniel Craig/Rachel Weisz

206. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#10**
This former A list singer was supposed to spend an entire weekend with her child(ren) but ended up spending just three hours with the child(ren) before calling it quits. Britney Spears

207. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#11**
This is the craziest thing I have heard. This A/A- list reality star wants her significant other to walk away from millions of dollars and quit his job just because she is afraid he will cheat on her unless he is with her 24/7. Kourtney Kardashian/Younes Bendjima

208. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#12**
This permanent A- list mostly movie actress who has been acting since she was a child has a bartender she hooks up with a few times a week. She is rich and he is not. She says she isn't paying him anything, but every time he comes over he always needs "cab fare," and she gives him like $1000. That is one hell of a cab. Drew Barrymore

209. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#13**
This former commercial actress/wannabe television actress/sometime model has given up any pretense at all and flew to the city where you get your photo taken for the "yachting look book." She wants to be a wife though which means she will probably have to relocate overseas for the next six months. Charlotte McKinney (Miami)

210. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#14**
This permanent A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner was the king of coke this past weekend while partying in a club where they didn't stop any patrons from doing line after line. It was one of the craziest parties I have heard about in quite some time. Nothing like sports and celebrities. Leonardo DiCaprio (volleyball game) (dinner with Lebron James)

211. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#15**
This former A list "singer" from back in the day is doing things right. She knows her ability to sell tickets is limited despite everyone knowing her. She is teaming up with as many casinos as possible who have agreed to buy 50% of all her seats. No matter what, it will look like she is filling up theatres. Paula Abdul

212. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#16**
As I told you and revealed, this former A list spokesperson has set in motion what would normally be a ridiculous motion to get freed. In this case however, it will be granted and his sentence reduced or commuted because of the information he provided. Jared Fogle ("Subway" spokesperson)

213. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#17**
This A list hairstylist has an office in the Middle East? Why? She provides a cover story and a reason for a work visa for models headed there for other reasons. Our hairstylist gets a nice fee for her services and allows her to spend money on hobnobbing and making it seem as if she is huge in the celebrity world. Jen Atkin

214. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/16 **#18**

**THE INTERVIEW**

PART ONE
This interview was not formal in any sense of the word. I happened to know where this former Disney actress would be and the current A-/B+ lister knew I was coming and why I wanted to talk. She named some names, but not others. In addition, some of the names she did give are very small players and I have not had a chance to talk to them, so just give their general job description. This is not an obscure actress. All of you know who she is and she wants to come forward. She wants to speak on the record and on camera but is scared she will no longer have a career. She doesn't want to be known as the person who told everything and but never gets work. She is still super young and wants to earn enough to live on before going public. She did say that if you get a camera in front of her while she is drunk, she might change her mind. I started out by asking her with her first experiences in show business and if she has ever been molested or assaulted. She gave a very long response. I have done some light editing because she was giving her exact age so I generalized it to make it more difficult to guess. "I guess I was a tween when I first started. That was actually a pretty good experience as I look back at it now. It was a good role and I really thought that was the kind of work I was going to do my whole career. Even though it was a good experience, I remember that men and women had to share some dressing rooms because the cast was so large. I had two or three changes of clothes and I definitely got some stares that made me uncomfortable, but men had been staring at me for years so it was something I was used to. I shouldn't have been used to it, but I was. There were a lot of women in corsets in the production and I think the men were more focused on them. I was so excited just to be acting and getting paid that I didn't really notice much of anything else outside my limited view of the world." "I really thought after that production that I would get lots of work and that agents and managers would be fawning over me. It never occurred to my tween brain that probably no one of any significance had seen it. My hopes for private jets and screaming fans was going to have to wait." "During the time immediately after that production I went out on a lot of auditions. I was lucky to have my mom with me for most of them. Honestly, if I have one piece of advice to parents who want to be managers to their kids is that you need to be there. If you are not there, shit is going to happen to your kids they will never get over. It's one thing to go out of town and your kids have a party with their friends. Think about if you go out of town and the people that come over are a bunch of adults who are going to pass around your kid like a party favor and take pictures of the whole thing." "I know I didn't get a lot of roles because my mom was there. Some other kid would go in and their parent wouldn't be there. That girl would be forced to strip to her underwear and they would take a bunch of Polaroids and have her pose in a bunch of positions. They would do this for literally hundreds of girls each week. I know they did it to boys too, but I never really saw that, just heard it from friends." "When they would see I had my mom with me, they would have me come in and read a few lines and say thanks and that was it. Two or three minutes tops. The other girls would be in for 20-30 minutes and come out looking worked over." "Call backs were always in a private office rather than in a public office. I once had a callback for a commercial. There was this guy there who worked for the company who was selling the product. It was for some chewing gum. He was seated behind his desk and couldn't stand up because his pants were on the floor and he was stroking himself while talking to me. He asked me if I wanted to see and I said no and I ran out of that f**king place. Meanwhile there were a bunch of girls there in the waiting room and I knew one of them would say yes. The pressure even when I was a tween was to say yes. These girls are the income for their parents. Even if the parents don't say touch the man's d**k, the girl knows they are the income for the family. What kind of parents quit their jobs and have some 11 year old girl be their sole source of income." "Oh, and even though I didn't go around the corner to see that guy's d**k, I have been told point blank that if I didn't touch a d**k, I was not going to get a job. In fact, that is how I got my big break. I got cast on a show and didn't have to do anything with anyone. They just liked me. The reason I didn't have to do anything is because I was a little older then. I was in my mid-teens. They were afraid I would fight back. They did molest and force at least two of my younger co-stars to blow a producer and told each of them separately that whoever could get the guy to orgasm first would get the job and the other would be sent home. These girls were like 13 or 14. The sad f**king thing is this was not the first time they had to audition like this. Oh, and all the while some a-hole is filming them too so he can tell his jerkoff friends that he is the casting couch king. I guarantee that if you go to some teen show producer's house or his cloud or whatever, there are hundreds of hours of him with tweens and teens." "Anyway, my show was going well and I knew it was going well and I knew they loved me and they wanted to do bigger things. Instead, they brought me in and said they were going to fire me and bring in someone more cooperative. Next thing I know, I am losing my virginity to a sweaty old fat face f**k producer on his office couch while crying the whole time and vowing to get revenge. The fat f**k." "I got my promotion and show though. I can't even talk about the show without seeing this guy. I should never have agreed. I don't think I even said yes, I just kind of gave in and he was all over me. It took about 2 minutes and I hated my life for six months after that. I shut down. I started drinking a bit and then a lot and blamed myself. The thing is I was going through some rough s**t in my life right then and my mom couldn't be around like she had been. She was rarely around through no fault of her own and it was up to me to fight my own battles and I just wasn't ready. The first season of that show was them trying to get me into the skimpiest of clothes and to go without bras and was just a pawing and grope fest. I was a f**king piece of meat." "The girls that would come in for an episode or two or a walk on role had it the worst. They hadn't "made" it yet so had to prove themselves. The producers had a Halloween bucket. Instead of candy though it had condoms. They would grab one and say they were going trick or treating. The one mandate from above was there could not be any pregnancies. None. That Halloween bucket was filled every month and it was a big bucket. That shows you how much they were f**king other people. A hit show and the producers were way more concerned with raping a 16 year old than the show."

PART TWO
"The thing about television shows is that there are days you can dodge and hide and know what to do to avoid being groped or talked about at least in front of your face. Those guys in the suits were always coming around and you know what their first stop always was? Well, after craft services where they would grab a water bottle and start talking about who they f**ked the night before or why they bought their girlfriend new t*ts and were just disgusting? They would go to wardrobe. They would go in just to see how everything was going and make sure the budget wasn't being wasted in clothes. They would sit in the door or just inside the trailer and watch these teenage girls getting dressed and undressed. Totally naked and the guys would sit there drinking those water bottles and every so often pretending to text when they were really taking pictures. What is one of those girls supposed to say? Get out? F**k that. They want to work. What is the hair or makeup or wardrobe person supposed to say? Get out? They want to work too. So, everyone would work as quickly as possible. What the girls hated hearing was one of the suits asking someone else what a girl's name was. That girl knew she was going to be called in for a "meeting." That meeting was going to be in an empty trailer except for a couch that folds out into a bed and she was going to be "counseled" about her future. Those trailers would be filled with used condoms by the end of the day. I don't know who had to clean the trailers, but I'm sure they thought they were on a porn set." "I started all that because I meant to talk about the difference between movies and television. After a certain amount of practice and because I had reached a certain level in the show, I could go a day or even a week without being hassled. I knew what to do and where to go and places to avoid. I knew who would hide me and the secret places on set to go check my phone and grab an hour for myself. On a movie? That first movie had me all messed up. I was out of town. I was out of the country and I was in a remote location. I know this is why we started talking. That guy I had to work with. That guy who gives me shivers. I sometimes wish I was in one of those Ashley Judd movies where she went after the guy and killed him for what he did to her. I want that. I know I'm famous. I know I make a lot of money compared to almost everyone else in this country. I get it. I have put up with a lot of crap behavior, but did it because I love the actual filming. The trade off was worth it. The last few years dealing with this asshole have been the worst of my life." "From day one on this movie set I had no place to escape. If I disappeared, I would have three PA's looking for me to bring me back. At my hotel, they knew where to find me. I even checked into a different hotel to hide but some of the crew ended up staying in that hotel so that was a bust. The second night I showed up there he was in the lobby just waiting. There is a point I just gave up. I checked out. I literally just gave in and let him take me to his suite and have sex with me. I was breaking down and it seemed easier to be done with it. The good news was he didn't chase me around all the time or hunt me down. The bad part was I was now his property. He even flat out told people he owned me. If a guy came on set or an executive was visiting from LA, he would put his arm around me almost in a choke hold and grab my breast right in front of the visitor. I was his property." "I have never been the same since that experience. Prior to that, I could hide things. My boyfriend didn't know about the on set stuff on the tv show because I didn't really share it. I know he would just blame me for it so why bother. After the movie though, I was a different person. My boyfriend left and there has been no one for me since. I don't really want anyone. Sometimes I will meet someone cute and go to dinner but I'm watching out for me and these guys only care about themselves and getting in my pants. F**kboys is what I call them. I would rather go home and drink wine and forget the day or week or month." "In positive news, I am involved in a couple productions right now and honestly, I have not been groped or gawked at or even discussed in a sexual manner as far as I know. One of the projects doesn't really have an opportunity for that kind of interaction and is the main reason I took it. I get to act and not have to worry about any of the crap that comes with it. Do you think if I told people I was a lesbian, the guys would leave me alone?"

Actress: Dove Cameron
Mom: Bonnie Wallace
First experiences in show business: Young Cosette in the Bainbridge Performings Arts stage production of "Les Miserables"
Big break: "Liv and Maddie"
Teen show producer: Andy Fickman
First movie: "Descendants" (filmed in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada)
Director: Kenny Ortega
Boyfriend: Ryan McCartan
Current projects: "Dumplin'" starring Jennifer Aniston; "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D."

215. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#1**
It was no accident that this closeted foreign born former A+ list boy bander turned A- list solo artist said what he said over the weekend to the group of celebrities he said it to. He did it to shake things up a lot in their worlds. Harry Styles ("One Direction")/Kendall Jenner/Shawn Mendes ("I mean, we’re all a little bit gay," the singer told the fan as the audience cheered. "We’re all a little bit gay, aren’t we?")

216. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#2**
This A- list director who used to be a B+ list director just couldn't stay away from the threesomes involving a relative of an ex and this foreign born model who is a celebrity offspring. That was a marriage killer right there.
Director: Eli Roth
Ex/relative: Peaches Geldof/Pixie Geldof
Celebrity offspring: Daisy Lowe (father Gavin Rossdale)

217. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#3**
Is it going to shock anyone here that this foreign born C list celebrity who is insanely wealthy had to buy her own engagement ring. Her slightly slightly higher on the list celebrity boyfriend offered to buy one, but she was having no part of it. She thinks it is love, but she also wants to be in charge of what people think about her ring. Chloe Green/Jeremy "Hot Felon" Meeks

218. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#4**
According to this one named singer, this celebrity/businessperson/frequent Tweeter gets a little out of hand when he is coming down from one of his coke benders. Grimes/Elon Musk

219. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#5**
Speaking of coke, this former MTV star really needs to worry about her own coke use. In the past year, it has gone from fun weekend thing to a daily need. One issue, other than the obvious is how will it affect that new big deal she signed because they have a zero tolerance drug policy AND have a punitive clause where they can seek damages to their brand if she violates any number of terms in their morality clause. Ashlee Simpson

220. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#6**
It was a fishing expedition put on by the PR team of this A list rapper and her husband. There are no tabloids willing to pay six figures for baby pictures any longer unless you are guaranteed to sell magazines by the truckload. In the age of social media, those days are long gone. The PR team was hoping some tabloid would bite at the rumor. Nope. Not going to happen. Cardi B/Offset

221. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#7**
This pay cable network is set to cancel an upcoming show by this radio host over recent revelations that keep popping up. The thing that is sad and disgusting is that his current employer thinks his behavior is just fine because he hosts a number one show. They also thought the same thing when another number one host had accusations leveled against him. They care about ratings, not victims. Charlamagne tha God (HBO)

222. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#8**
Another link. Another hey there is nothing to see here to the press who will go quietly into that good night and do and report what they are told, especially with the secrets act in that country. A dinner for two between two former in-laws. A subtle spiking of a drink and then this foreign born former A- list model/keeper of secrets/reality star passes away. Annabelle Neilson (ex-husband: Nathaniel Philip Rothschild) (cause of death: "cerebrovascular accident" )

223. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#9**
This A+ list mostly movie actor always has a good reason why he should be distanced from box office disasters in which he stars. He takes ALL the credit when things go well, but has a team in place to blame others or other reasons for any lackluster numbers. This time is no different, except the tabloids are printing word for word what the PR people say. Grow a spine tabloids. Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson ("Skyscraper")

224. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#10**
Mr. X: What current Disney Channel actor, who is out of the closet in private but not openly yet, has spent most of his summer yachting across Europe? The yacht he's been pictured on via his social media actually belongs to that disgraced director/producer who's been hiding out overseas. Kevin Quinn ("Bunk'd")/Bryan Singer

225. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#11**
Mr. X: While this one named permanent A+++ list entertainer keeps saying she'll never retire, she is going to scale back her workload over the next year or so. Yes she's got a new album ready to be released, but I'm hearing whispers that the arena tour that will accompany the album might be her last one and she'll only be doing smaller venues after that. Madonna

226. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#12**
Mr. X: In a move which surprises no one, producers of the upcoming season of that celebrity version of that reality show juggernaut (the US version that is) are very close to signing this former girl group member/frequent reality star who loves plastic surgery. They're really hoping she spills on her affair that got her back in the headlines a while back. You know who else they're in negotiations with? A lady you all know who has been in the headlines a lot lately. "Celebrity Big Brother"/Aubrey O’Da (Donald Trump Jr./Stormy Daniels

227. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#13**
This former naked celebrity turned multiple show reality star is not closeted, but doesn't go out of her way to talk about her bisexuality. She has hooked up with a married out former A+ lister for some $$. Kendra Wilkinson

228. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#14**
Apparently this radio company was perfectly OK with this A list rapper with a movie sounding name double cupping some sizzurp doing a radio interview marathon with different announcers. Wiz Khalifa ("The Wiz") ("The Breakfast Club" radio show)

229. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#15**
This thinks she is about to be married reality star from a bar based show has no idea no deposits have been placed and no arrangements she thinks have been made by her soon to be husband have actually been made. This should be interesting. Brittany Cartwright/Jax Taylor ("Vanderpump Rules")

230. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/17 **#16**
Cocaine Cowboy: Screaming at the top of your lungs that you are a cocaine cowboy is probably the not best thing if you are this A- list mostly television actor from a fairly hit cable show all of you know, but not from his acting. The actor, who only clawed his way back up the list with this show, was once A- list back in the day. Not ever the best actor, but had good looks and a very public relationship, he has struggled with sobriety. He has also had issues with violence towards women. Doing lines of coke this week with a bunch of half naked models who would like nothing more than to be seen with him is par for the course. One of the models was not as interested as the others which he took as a personal offense. She says he punched her in the stomach and while she had her mouth open gasping for air he forced himself into her mouth. He told her he would punch her again unless she kept doing it. So, she kept doing it until he finished and then he said all women come around eventually to him and she would be back more for later. Her roommate at the hotel told her to call the police, but our model refused because she has a boyfriend and thinks the boyfriend would think it was her fault for going to a party in the actor's suite. Ryan Phillippe ("Shooter")/Reese Witherspoon

231. NAUGHTY GOSSIP 07/18
Which Food Network star is being looked at by independent investigators after a makeup artist claims she was verbally assaulted on the set of one of his hit shows? The married chef, who has children, insists that the whole thing was a misunderstanding, however, the network decided that the alleged incident needed to be investigated. What with his having a public image as the perfect family man, insiders were shocked to hear that the star was being accused of saying some very, very naughty things to the lady who just wanted to do her job! Guy Fieri

232. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#1**
This foreign born alliterate model is doing a lot of blah blah blah about her ex, but is still hooking up with the guy she doesn't want anyone to know about. Asia Argento (Anthony Bourdain)

233. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#2**
This former A list mostly movie actress who is probably down to an A- list and would be much lower if not for another installment of one of her movies used a makeup trick to cover up some bruising caused by an incident at home and even made up a nice story to go with it just in case anyone noticed the bruising that has no basis in reality. Amanda Seyfried ("Mamma Mia! 2: Here We Go Again")/Thomas Sadoski (jealous of her filming with ex Dominic Cooper)

234. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#3**
This misspelled flowering financial institution of a singer/rapper is spinning a yarn about her latest album. The truth is no one will give her any money to make it and she has no money of her own. She is basically living off donations from fans and the occasional appearance. She is super talented but turns record companies and investors off so quickly because she gets so many people so angry. Azealia Banks

235. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#4**
The years and the players change, but never the reason. This A- list reality star with the lucrative side gig has one reason why she and the guy she would have split with already if not for the one night stand that turned into a lifetime connection do not go out in public very often. His reason, like so many other famous guys before him is he wants to make sure when he is out in public alone it is still easy for him to pick up other women for new one night stands. Kylie Jenner/Travis Scott

236. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#5**
Apparently this permanent A list "singer" from a group and solo who now does a lot more reality television than singing which is a blessing for us all if you have ever seen her actually try to sing live rather than using a backing track had given her A list boyfriend an ultimatum about his drinking. Things have been going downhill awhile and the end is nigh. Gwen Stefani/Blake Shelton (falls on stage)

237. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#6**
This would make at least the third athlete from this particular team from a Summer Olympics sport that no longer wants to participate in the sport because they know they are addicted to opioids and would never pass a drug test and have no desire to compete again. This one is not alliterate and has arguably been in the news more than any other team member.

238. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#7**
There is a new book out there about Old Hollywood and says that a pair of permanent A list mostly movie actors were long time lovers. Nothing more distant from the truth. In the past, the author was already debunked about numerous claims and stories they have written.

239. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#8**
A Birdie Blind Item: When it comes to celebrity suicides, there is often an element of the inexplicable. Not so much, this one. If the cache of files - obtained through years of surveillance, and statements from at least one defector - are ever released, you'll know that his spying went beyond walking into a certain embassy, drunk, this one time. He believed that he might end up like the famous/notorious couple, which is a sad irony. It's not that they had stopped bugging his phones, and reading his mail - especially at the western retreat - but he was by then a has-been, professionally speaking, and otherwise. Not even the intelligence community cared about him anymore.

240. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#9**
A disgraced A-list director and his entire cabal are panicking right now. They all know a bomb is about to be dropped, and have instructed all of their minions to do whatever they can. Bryan Singer (World War III (TV Series) (announced))

241. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#10**
A Birdie Blind Item: Interesting, the choice of subject matter by the best-selling writer whose one particular work you may have read, or even now seen. By interesting, I mean, his late father, and his own past. If you're a student of a particular generational movement, way back in the day, or have even seen the movie about a certain incident, it all seems justified. But that's only part of the story. Yes, he married, of course, but his secret predilections were closer to those of his longtime, literal follower. In fact, according to the deathbed confession of a recently deceased former vice cop, he was the one behind a string of disappearances in the district famous for theater and other, more discreet services. He would earn the boy's trust by plausibly claiming he was reporting on their plight, even giving them money for food and a place to stay. But when they came to trust him well enough to get into his car, it was the last anyone would see of them. And, really, when it came to most of the boys, who would even miss them? The son knows nothing of his father's secret life. Who might have? This other writer, who famously left the country for good before any of it happened. Whenever the father would visit, one or two boys employed as a certain kind of household servant would vanish, presumed, usually, to have run away.

Best selling writer: Caleb Carr
One particular work: "The Alienist"
Late father: Lucien Carr
Generational movement: "Beat Generation"
Certain incident: Killing in Riverside Park "Kill Your Darlings" (killing of David Kammerer)
Longtime, literal follower: William S. Burroughs
Other writer, who famously left the country: Allen Ginsberg

242. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#11**
That foreign born A+ list mogul/reality judge/star/a-hole/chain smoker is about to have a world of serious crap come down on his over sized egotistical head in the next week. It is all courtesy of that long time employee he treated wretchedly yet again and a former "employee," who is trying to expose a world of underage abuse with singers being pawned off for sexual favors to whoever will pay the most. Simon Cowell

243. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#12**
Apparently botox and breast lifts can only do so much. This former A+ list mostly television actress from an iconic role who now mainly does movies and not always very well is filming a new project. She went to lunch with a younger female assistant, but only about a decade younger. A waitress asked the assistant in front of our actress, "Your mother looks so familiar." The actress was not pleased. Courteney Cox

244. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#13**
Our favorite madam should look very very closely to the person she thinks is her best friend. That friend not only sells stories to the tabloids, but is also trying to get our madam charged with some very serious crimes so the friend can assume the business. Farrah Abraham/Frenchy Morgan

245. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#14**
This former A+ list singer who is now probably A- list wishes she could afford the vacation she is on right now. The only time she can afford a yacht is if she is hooking up with the owner for passage. Her significant other doesn't seem to mind because she lets him hook up with the Instagram models. Christina Aguilera/Matthew Rutler

246. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#15**
This is one that is about being blindsided. I don't think this former A-/B+ list actress who is not that great of an actress and certainly not a very good businessperson either knows what her A list celebrity husband is doing. She thinks he is being warm and kind and doing some things in their best interest. Nope. He is setting it all up to dump her in a very cold, leave her with nothing kind of way. He wants her to see one hand while the other is wreaking havoc behind her back. Jessica Biel/Justin Timberlake

247. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/18 **#16**
Questions Remain: The investigation into the death of this A list celebrity continues to move forward. By my count, at least three dozen people have been interviewed. Included on the list are seven, count them seven people the significant other of the celebrity was cheating on the celebrity with. Not cheated on, but cheating. I'm not sure how the significant other had time to do anything but cheat. Apparently the cheating was causing a lot of friction between the pair and the fact that the significant other was using the funds of the celebrity to pay for all of this cheating. We are talking not tens of thousands of dollars, but hundreds of thousands of dollars in gifts and cash and trips and expenses. This was not money the celebrity had just kicking around the house but money that was essentially everything the celebrity owned, all going towards the good times of the significant other. Also interesting is that $5M boost to the life insurance policy of the celebrity about nine months ago that was already at $10M. There is an attempt at spinning at those close to the significant other, but it won't change the result. Kate Spade/Andy Spade

248. POPBITCH 07/19
It's been a trend among celeb chefs to release cookbooks encouraging healthy eating and balanced nutrition – but which TV foodie is using a much more old-skool method to stay trim? By necking diet pills until they get the shakes.

249. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#1**
This underage A-/B+ list Disney actress had a gun held to her head recently while she was orally servicing her older boyfriend. She says he is just like that and she doesn't mind. Where are the parents??? Skai Jackson

250. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#2**
ESPY Awards: By the time this A list celebrity couple hit the red carpet, the tension was simmering between them. At an after party they started off fighting before realizing everyone was looking. Whenever she is in LA, she hooks up with a guy she has been seeing for a long time. This time though, her higher on the list in his corner of the entertainment world celebrity husband wouldn't let her out of his sight and they were just miserable the entire week. Ciara/Russell Wilson

251. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#3**
This cable outlet has specific criteria to meet before it will give you its version of an icon award. One of those is, if you are a person of color, you are starting out with 85 strikes against you and internally they say there are only two people of color they would even give an icon award to right now and about 100 white people. So, yeah, basically it is like winning any kind of award at People if you are a person of color. Missy Elliot (MTV/VMA Video "Vanguard Award")

252. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#4**
ESPY Awards: So, yeah, somehow this closeted NFL player who doesn't play quarterback thought if he hit up Grindr while in town that no one would recognize him. Ummm, that definitely wasn't the case. Odell Beckham Jr.

253. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#5**
A new album dropping and a new year long tour were just the last straw. Apparently this former A+ list tweener had been telling her long time on again off again actor significant other they could finally settle down. With this news, that would be pushed almost two years and our actor has not been willing to wait that long so they split. It is not the first split. Maybe it won't last, but for now it is a split. Here is an interesting side note to all of this. A foreign born ex of the actor is with an actor right now who won't commit and she is tiring of it. If our former tweener is not careful, I see her actor and his foreign born ex hooking up and eloping within a month because they both want the same thing. Miley Cyrus/Liam Hemsworth (Eiza González/Josh Duhamel)

254. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#6**
ESPY Awards: This B+ list actress/singer who has had more success singing than her Disney career is not old enough to drink yet, but she was doing coke like a champ and definitely went back to the hotel of this married hockey player. from her home state. Olivia Holt

255. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#7**
Never had sex with a woman, so he considers that being chaste. No one has ever asked this one season reality star about the men he has hooked up with. Colton Underwood ("The Bachelorette")

256. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#8**
ESPY Awards: This permanent A list athlete in multiple sports was being his usual a-hole self this week. Apparently he made one woman cry when she refused his pickup lines by stating she has a boyfriend. He told her that unless her boyfriend was a millionaire and was famous that she should give him up and "give up her p***y" to our athlete because otherwise it was useless. Yeah, still winning hearts and minds this one. Shaun White

257. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#9**
ESPY Awards: Why yes, that was this A list mostly television actress who is an Emmy winner/nominee from a very hit network show drunk off her ass last night yelling at everyone that they should all go do karaoke. She was drinking straight from wine and vodka bottles. Allison Janney

258. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#10**
ESPY Awards: This long time onscreen personality/pseudo celebrity from back in the day has been making a come back of sorts through her offspring who is turning into a celebrity. Apparently though, the matriarch believes in racial purity and won't let her daughter date anyone who is not as white as white can be.

259. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#11**
ESPY Awards: This alliterate NBA player is still young. Apparently he also needs to let his mother know where he is at all times because when he was not texting with his mother he was face timing her. It was very strange. Kyle Kuzma

260. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#12**
This foreign born B+ list mostly television actress who stars on a pay cable show that is soon ending wants to marry her female lover but her management team told her they would stop representing her if she does.

261. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#13**
This foreign born A- list actress/model who is focusing more on movies now after her almost television start recently overdosed and had to be saved with Narcan. Ruby Rose

262. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#14**
A Dancing Boy Blind Item: So I have a new/old source for certain goings on in Africa and the Arab world, including the mideast to Hollywood dancing boy pipeline: this is my most recent twitter follower - a certain senior foreign correspondent, and mideast bureau chief during the aughts. (More than 20% of my high school graduating class went to the same college, including her.) [Okay, so it was just two people, out of twelve...] We made the transcon journey together, in her playboy dad's luxury sedan, along with an extremely large trunk full of apparently secret belongings [I wasn't allowed to look inside]. We were denied lodging in Alabama because we weren't married [maybe, I guess, shoulda stopped in Vegas {ironic we were banned from the inn, because, it turned out, a certain law enforcement/judicial convention was taking place, very probably including someone who had been banned from the mall}]. I also learned that the South is full of teen fast food workers very eager to leave [as in: where you guys going? a: *** **** q: can I come? a: no, but thanks] and alligator tastes like an old boot.) When I get to the college times material, there will likely be a road trip short about that. You can imagine who we met up with in a certain southern college town (the one, I mean, in the peach-themed state), and the story he has to tell. (Spoiler alert: Walter's bbq had closed down.) What happens when we reach our destination? The aforementioned luxury sedan explodes. We should've been inside at the time...

Someone who had been banned from the mall: Roy Moore
Town: Athens, GA

263. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#15**
This A list celebrity might just call this former tweener a friend but he certainly has certain things he requires his friend to do before he is willing to call his dealer for her. She lost her dealer when she fought with her assistant who was sleeping with the singer's dealer. She is dependent on others for access and is having to pay for access to the new dealer and it is not being paid with money. Demi Lovato/G-Eazy

264. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/19 **#16**
The Clique: An actor all of you know is spilling about his time with his clique that has pushed him out because of his sexuality. Once you are in this little clique, you usually are in for life. This little acting circle gets you lots and lots of work. You have to bow down to the A+ list actor in charge of it all, and drop everything when he tells you to drop it, but you will get a lot of easy high paid work. You can be the creepiest of creeps when it comes to women and you will not get booted. If you get busted on set getting handsy with someone, there are no issues. That NDA she signed to keep her quiet will be enforced with maximum effect. Sure, if you force yourself on her or something worse, they might have to write a check, but, hey, they all do it, even the married ones, so no getting kicked out of the group. Apparently what will you get booted is if you are gay, unless you are a woman and are willing to do threesomes with any of the actors. That is perfectly acceptable and encouraged. One foreign born A- list actress said when she first encountered the clique while filming a role prior to becoming famous, she thought if she told them she was gay, they would leave her alone. Nope. The next day, they brought a female to her and told her to prove it or she would be fired. She then ended up having sex with the woman and two of the actors, both of whom were married. They still are actually. Our actor says that everything was good as long as he pretended to be straight and talked about his beards. As soon as the former A list mostly movie actor from multiple big films who has seen his career slide to B list since a franchise ended, started talking about a male crush he had on a crew member, the crew member was fired. Our actor has not worked with the clique in several years now, after working on multiple projects. In fact, they spread the word to such an extent, that he has had trouble getting work at all any longer and the former almost A+ lister is now starting to do Comic Cons to make ends meet.
Former A+ list actor: Leonardo DiCaprio
Former A list movie actor: Tobey Maguire
Franchise: "Spiderman"
Foreign born A- list actress:

265. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#1**
Don't believe the hype. This former A+ list mostly movie actor who is still a solid A lister when he is not drunk or whacked out of his mind on all the drugs he takes is not dating the always trying to be sober former B+ list singer/celebrity offspring of an A++ lister and an ad for a new season of Botched. Johnny Depp/Lisa Marie Presley

266. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#2**
This foreign born A+ list singer/rapper has plenty of time to play musical hookers (last one in the car each stop gets kicked to the side of the road or has to service the driver to stay in the game) but has no time he says to see his child. Not seeing or even trying to reach out and contact through video either. It is pretty sad. Probably why he always basically forces the women he gets pregnant into having abortions. Drake

267. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#3**
Last I checked, and I checked early last week, this soon to be a probable A+ list NFL player who is already A list in the NFL city where he plays had a girlfriend. A long time girlfriend. So, it was interesting to see his choice of who to cheat on her with. I don't think it was who any of us would have guessed. San Francisco 49ers quarterback Jimmy Garoppolo(porn star Kiara Mia)

268. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#4**
While the cameras were rolling, this NBA player finally figured out he is just a pawn in the chess world of this momager and her desire to keep the reality money train going as long as possible. The ex showing up before was on him. The ex showing up this time was because the momager knew it would make for good ratings.
NBA player: Ben Simmons
Momager: Chris Jenner (Kendall Jenner)
Ex: Tinashe

269. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#5**
A month before she even went on tour I told you to not waste your money to go see this former A list singer/federal inmate. I didn't even think the tour would go the distance, but I was sure, most nights people would leave angry and frustrated and wanting their money back. The result? People are frustrated and want their money back and for the singer to come to the show with at least more coherence than a late stage Amy Winehouse concert. These shows are a disaster. Lauryn Hill

270. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#6**
Look for this news executive to not return to his post when he says he will return. This is all posturing to make him and everything else about to go down, look good.

271. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#7**
You have never heard so much complaining. This former A- list mostly movie actress from a famous movie franchise who now makes her money doing bad television says Comic Con is a waste of time. She says the accommodations always suck and that no guys there can ever afford her rates or even really know who she is. Tara Reid ("American Pie"/"Sharknado")

272. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#8**
Dead Poets Society - A Dancing Boy Blind: The one about strange and sinister goings on in the production of a certain near tv series based on the works of a permanent A list novelist is coming (release is next week, I believe), but here's another one: On the 21st day of the first month in the year of our Lord, 2008 (as he might say), I and many others lost an important mentor, teacher, and spiritual adviser. He was also a writer, and friend of many in the old elite, penning memoirs about more than one of those friendships. (His obit was published in the west coast paper of record sixteen days later.) What he didn't and couldn't say in one of those memoirs, largely because of the widow, but also because propriety didn't allow it, is what or rather who inspired one of the several most famous English language literary works of the last century. It was a poem, pioneering in form, with enough allusions to keep scholars busy for decades, and probably longer. It was also what the author's life had become, in his view, after the loss of this one person. The person in question? A boy, who his friend - my teacher - guesses was probably sixteen at the time they first met. It's unclear when the physical part began (probably two years later, when he had finished school), but not what happened next: he enlisted, as so many of his fellows had, and was killed in a gas attack on the western front before his twentieth birthday. By the time the friend met him, he was still pious, but drinking too much, and wandering, in that state, to a certain part of the capital city. The young men he picked up sometimes stole from him, sometimes pitied him, but rarely recognized him (it's not like most of them read books). How do I know? After I turned eighteen, I was invited to lunch at the famous LA chili establishment, where I met the friend's secret husband for the first time - an old Hollywood man named Maurice. After several drinks, followed by several more, he told me this story, and others (to come)... I immediately ordered a phone (do you remember when you could order a phone at restaurants?), and dialed my soon-to-be college roommate, with whom I'd been coincidentally arguing about this very subject for several weeks by letter. It was at least half-like that scene in the most famous movie by the accused but apparently not so disgraced director his backers won't give him money - the part where they're waiting in line - but for real.

273. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#9**
Mr. X: There are several men who are prepping to come forward about this annoying name dropper of a late night host saying he either sexually harassed, date raped or assaulted them. The allegations, from what I've heard, are extremely graphic and a definite career killer. He might try to pay off these accusers and rally his celeb "friends" to defend him, but I honestly cannot wait to see him taken down. Andy Cohen

274. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#10**
What character actor who played a dad on a Disney Channel show and is also a celeb spawn, had nude pics from his Grindr account posted all over the internet after the guy who he was sexting recognized him? The actor is married to a woman and has kids, but like his father is deep in the closet. David Deluise (Dom Deluise)

275. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#11**
Mr. X: Which member of that reality star family got busted for double parking in a handicapped parking spot by a photog? Thankfully for her, the photog worked for that three lettered gossip website who is on the family's payroll so the cops weren't called and she wasn't ticketed. Kendall Jenner (TMZ)

276. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#12**
These two A+/A list mostly movie actors have no problems wife swapping. They seem to do it pretty regularly. Chris Hemsworth/Matt Damon

277. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#13**
Apparently when our favorite former actress was back in the States a few months ago, she slipped her drug of choice past her protection via a friend. This time around, she is going to have to find a new way to get herself supplied. Oh, I have no doubts she will. It is one of the main reasons she is visiting. She misses that kind of partying and she knows no one will dare arrest her if she is busted. It is partying without having to worry about any legal consequences at all. Meghan Markle

278. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#14**
All smiles last night, but two weeks ago this A- list celebrity was sporting a busted lip courtesy of her athlete husband way further down the list. He is no stranger to domestic violence. Ronda Rousey/Travis Browne (Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Sports 2018)

279. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#15**
This A+ list mostly movie actress who is also doing all kinds of television now and is an Academy Award winner/nominee and has multiple side gigs delayed by over a year her black eye just because she was so scared of what the pain was going to be like. Now, she is the one who others turn to for advice on how best to deal with the fear and pain. Reese Witherspoon/Ryan Phillippe

280. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 07/20 **#16**
A Birdie Blind Item: You might say that this one movie - made during a stand-out decade for the medium - was inspired by real life events. It's ironic though because the now/long time permanent A list actor who starred in it had been literally, and on foot, pursued by radicals of a different kind. It all took place roughly a half-decade earlier when he was living in New York. There were flattering overtures by members of this one group - a cell within a cell - who lived in the neighborhood. They wanted him to be for them what the famous composer had been for another group, just a few years earlier. But they misunderstood his initial politeness as interest. He in fact wanted nothing to do with them. That's when things took a turn for the worse. When he began changing his daily routine to avoid them, they took notice, and staked out his apartment, following him to and from lunch dates, rehearsals, openings. The soft sell became a hard sell, with kidnapping threats, and intimations of violence. Even after he hired a full time security detail, and reported them to law enforcement, he had no idea what would happen next. You see: they had planned to kill him. Okay, not just him, but everyone on the entire block - a wealthy and fashionable enclave in Manhattan. If their plan had been successful, scores of people would have been murdered, including not just the families - men, women, and children - but also the help, as in disproportionately the very sort of people they claimed to represent. ("There goes the neighborhood," they'd planned to joke, in reference to the bombing.) What happened though may have altered the course of history, in a small but vital way, saving the lives of several hundred people, at least, at a nearby military installation. You see: some of the volatile explosives being stored in their residence ignited prematurely, killing the three rogue plotters (who had planned to abscond for an island nation, where they expected a hero's welcome), and leaving two other members (of the cell rather than cell-within-cell) injured, and stunned. Miraculously, a majority of the ordinance went unexploded, and only this one residence, rather than the whole neighborhood, was destroyed. The actor, of course, was unharmed. The national organization was chastened by the loss, and canceled further actions which would result in injury or loss of life. This, itself, is important to know. Their image, carefully cultivated for decades now, has been one of misguided, but not even itinerantly murderous, radicals. But if the very famous person who made a big return to the news cycle in recent days - an appearance in a foreign country (on a continent where, you'll note, he was not born) - had bothered to check with the then-current president (when he became acquainted with a certain group alum, I mean), he'd have known that federal law enforcement understood otherwise. Yes, there was talk of killing babies (of a certain race - their own), but it didn't stop there. The group was behind the bombing of police in a west coast town known for its university. One officer was permanently maimed, nearly losing his arm. Only the death of an informant helped them escape prosecution. What's more, or rather who else does this story involve? One of the heroes of the decade, known for his chats in the literal underground. It's funny the way that history classifies and reclassifies, because his primary reason for doing what he did was revenge. There had been efforts by all three branches of government to curtail the unlawful practices of he and his men (including threats of prosecution) - all of which were aimed at bringing down this group, and others like them. The irony, of course, is that he/they were engaging in some of the very conduct that would bring down his boss, and his men. It was either him or them, he thought, and he expected a change in leadership that would be more favorable to the work he was doing. His instincts were vindicated - just not in the way he imagined. The change in leadership was not in fact favorable to him and his men - he was indicted, after all - but by the time the more favorable leadership came, and his record was wiped clean (with, and could you even make this up, the support of his former boss), the whole movement was a pathetic husk of its former self, a relic from a different, more chaotic time. What else did he have in common with his former boss? A mixed preference, at least. Why do you suppose he originally struck up a conversation with the young man who along with his colleague would really alter the course of history? And, bringing this story back to the beginning, lets talk about the part the actor played in the other movie that same year...

Group: The Weather Underground
Actor: Dustin Hoffman
Movie: "All the President's Men"
Wealthy and fashionable enclave in Manhattan: Greenwich Village

Famous composer had been for another group: Leonard Bernstein/Black Panthers|
Military installation: Fort Dix
Island nation:
One of the "heroes of the decade": Mike Felt ("Deep Throat" of Watergate) (President Richard Nixon) (FBI/J. Edgar Hoover) (convicted of Civil Rights violations in pursuit of Weather Underground, pardoned by Ronald Reagan)
Unlawful practices: "Citizens' Commission to Investigate the FBI"

Other movie that same year: "Marathon Man"

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Last updated:  July 21,  2018

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