NOTE: Guesses in italics are only guesses;
guesses in RED are a link to the solution or substantial clues.
LAWYER 08/01 **#1**
This B+ list celebrity/singer is under a ton of pressure to marry his girlfriend. Lots. All she does is complain how she will get nothing if he dies and will leave her with nothing and that is not fair and that if they don't get married that he at least should change his will to leave her everything. She even had a will drawn up for him and has been begging him to sign it. All I can say to this guy is to hire someone to check your food before you eat it. Randy Travis
LAWYER 08/01 **#2**
This almost A list celebrity/reality star has not stopped rotating women. This past weekend he saw two of his regulars for sex and apparently everyone involved, no matter their circumstance is ok with all of this. Adam Levine; Lamar Odom
LAWYER 08/01 **#3**
This B list celebrity/singer with an amazing voice and mechanics all her own was seated next to a couple yesterday at lunch and she overheard it was their anniversary. She called over the waiter and secretly made arrangements to buy the couple their lunch. Then she had another thought and bought lunch for everyone in the place at the time which was about 25 tables and then left before anyone could thank her. Florence Welch
LAWYER 08/01 **#4**
This B- list mostly television actress is lucky to have a job on an almost network. At an event this week, there were drinks being passed around and waiters had food on trays and were passing through the crowd. It was a big crowd and a waiter was pushed into our actress, but did not spill anything. Instead of realizing the situation and handling everything calmly, our actress decided to be a bitch and yelled at the waiter in front of everyone. "Did you get anything on me? This fucking dress cost more than you will make in a year, so there better not be anything on it. Fucking loser waiter." This will be revealed. AnnaSophia Robb
LAWYER 08/01 **#5**
This A+ list model and current A list celebrity was sloppy drunk the other night and was letting any male or female who engaged her in conversation to touch her breasts. Apparently someone earlier in the day had said they were fake and all night she wanted to prove they were real. No one complained. This will be revealed. Cara Delevingne
LAWYER 08/01 **#6**
This A list reality star from a former hit cable show who is now on a middling hit cable show still has A+ list nickname recognition. She was having a threesome with her boyfriend and another guy and apparently was showing a little too much attention to the other guy and the boyfriend started yelling at her and then got into a fight with the other guy who is a producer on the show and who has been seeing the reality star on the sly. She thought this would be a way for them to be together without her having to feel guilty. Things are a mess. The producer did end up with a cut over his eye, but not from a punch. Hit it on a table after being pushed out of the bed.
LAWYER 08/01 **#7**
This A list mostly movie comedy actor was overheard telling friends the other day that he has almost convinced his actress wife to get breast implants after years of trying. He then went on to say that now maybe she will be worth looking at again. Yep, he really said it. Par for the course for this guy. Ben Stiller/Christine Taylor
LAWYER 08/01 **#8**
This celebrity/reality brother and sister team got into a huge fight this week because the sister was jealous of one of her brother's most recent conquests. He slept with one of her girlfriends and she was jealous. I don't understand because she is not bisexual or a lesbian. So, the only reason she could be jealous is if she wanted her brother all for herself? Eww. especially eww when you know who I am discussing. Julianne and Derek Hough
LAWYER 08/01 **#9**
This A list mostly movie actress who used to be A++ list got in touch with this A list mostly movie actor who she had a brief fling with when they made a movie a few years back. She called him to congratulate him and then said she was in town on a whim and they should meet for coffee. So, he left his significant other at a difficult time to have coffee and a two hour romp in a hotel room with the actress before she flew back home to her husband. Julia Roberts and Javier Bardem (Penelope Cruz just had a baby)
LAWYER 08/01 **#10**
This actress is B- list. She should be higher considering she is the star of a middling network hit that has been on the air for a few years now. She was mostly known prior to the show and likes people to think that she is this perfect person with a happy home life and everything is great. Turns out though that much of that happy home life came about because of an affair she had. One she does not talk about and will not talk about if asked. She likes it swept under the rug. The whole leaving her boyfriend and father of her child and lying about the reason. She likes to tell everyone it was this plain and vanilla reason when in reality it is because she met a very very rich man who threw money at her over the course of a very short time and promised her more and she dumped her boyfriend in a split second. It took him totally by surprise as one minute everything was fine and the next, her new boyfriend had hired movers and sent a private jet and our actress was moved out of her boyfriend's place and into her new boyfriend's place in a matter of hours. The new boyfriend loves telling everyone that he is having sex with the star of a network show. Within two minutes of meeting the guy he will tell you how they met and how he broke up the family and took her away from the other guy. The actress though? She keeps saying it was all very proper and innocent and nothing tawdry happened.
Actress: Poppy Montgomery
Former boyfriend: Adam Kaufman
Current boyfriend: Shawn Sanford, director of lifestyle marketing for Microsoft
POST/PAGE SIX 08/02
1. Which TV star hired top lawyers to keep a rape allegation from his early career secret? The accusation was later mysteriously dropped. Mario Lopez
2. WHICH reality TV star e-mailed us yesterday offering to fill in for Post columnist Andrea Peyser during her leave of absence? "I read that Andrea is taking a leave of absence from the paper" wrote the diva. "I would love to contribute on any level to the New York Post. Please let me know who to contact regarding content."
3. WHICH raging rock star was the late James Gandolfinis sobriety coach? "Rage Against the Machine" Tom Morello; Alex Baldwin "30 Rock"
4. WHAT attractive young production assistant was let go from a TV show because she attracted the attention of the married male host? Bosses did it to "save him from himself." Matt Lauer "The Today Show"
STREET KING 08/02
Shes a 41-year-old bisexual actress once was known for using a strapped-on dildo, during her lesbian relationship with Regina Hall. Were told, that while she took part in threesome smash session with Regina Hall and Omar Epps before reportedly dumping the pair to get with a "coke-sniffing" Denzel Washington. Sources say thats when our blind item believed the "Two Guns" leading man was going to dump his wife of 30-years, Pauletta, for her. Dont believe me.. Just ask Eva Mendes whos not only said to have led Denzel to dump our mystery lady for her, the actress is also reported to have previously taken on threesomes with Omar Epps and his wife Keisha (From 90s group Total). Now, sources say our blind item is left still looking for love. Can you guess who Im talking about? Sanaa Lathan
This leading Lady is on top of the world. Not because of her string of hits, its because she keeps getting high. When will she slow it down so she can just be high on her success? Paula Patton; Rihanna
LAWYER 08/02 **#1**
This former almost A list mostly television actress who is getting older, but is still gorgeous and has been linked with some of the biggest names in Hollywood must have forgotten to take her meds or she is back on the bottle. Apparently she thought her on and off actor boyfriend was cheating on her. He said it was a break. He also has several fewer intact windows after she saw a car in his driveway that belonged to another woman. Her key to his house no longer works, but her throwing arm does and she broke four or five windows before he could get outside to stop her. Hopefully he kept his date inside. Heather Locklear/Jack Wagner
LAWYER 08/02 **#2**
At a party this week, this former almost A-/B+ list mostly movie actress who is now a C+ lister who is riding a wave of publicity to get her that high, not only slapped what was her boyfriend after they got into a fight about her drinking, but also decided her skirt was too uncomfortable and removed it, leaving only her top and some spanx on. Yeah, it was classy. Tara Reid
LAWYER 08/02 **#3**
This A list celebrity chef/television personality was telling friends yesterday that he dodged a bullet. It turns out he had sex with Simon Cowell's new baby mama too and knows it would have been the end of his career if she had got pregnant with his baby. You know, because the chef is married. Bobby Flay
LAWYER 08/02 **#4**
This almost A list movie actress who used to be A list is producing a new project and auditioned several women to be a part of it. After rejecting the first 10 people because she thought they were better looking than our actress, the production company stepped in and convinced her that everyone would only have eyes for our actress and that her product was not going to sell well if everyone was ugly, especially considering the nature of the project. She did fire the one woman who kept flirting with her significant other though. Kate Hudson
LAWYER 08/02 **#5**
This B list singer/celebrity has a boyfriend. That never stops her from cheating though. She had a meeting with this almost A list celebrity/rapper. She thought they would be alone and she wants a favor from him so invited him to her hotel room for room service and was planning on making some moves. The A lister showed up with his wife though who made it very clear that she did not appreciate the B lister or her reputation or plans for her husband. This will be revealed. TI/Tiny/Rita Ora
LAWYER 08/02 **#6**
KINDNESS: This actress was almost B list. She was on a hit show on an almost network and was fired. She has lots of famous friends, but generally is only friends with them long enough to borrow some money to keep surviving. This week, our actress was on a red carpet and there were three women who were absolutely dying to meet two actors who were at the premiere. They had been camped out for a day and the actors had not noticed them. Our actress got the three women into the premiere and made sure they got photos with the actors. This might seem small, but this actress has never been known for doing anything kind. Ever. Jessica Szohr ("Gossip Girl")/The Film Society Of Lincoln Center And AMC Celebration Of 'Breaking Bad' Final Episodes at The Film Society of Lincoln Center
LAWYER 08/02 **#7**
This actress from a fairly hit network show found out her younger sister actress from a hit show was a lesbian when she discovered her sister in bed with another woman who was way older than her not legal sister.
LAWYER 08/02 **#8**
This A list celebrity/singer was out shopping this week and asked for a dressing room. She was buying jewelry. When asked about it, the celebrity said she wanted to see how it looked on her while she was naked. The staff let her use the employee restroom, but our celebrity did not like the light. They let her use the office of the manager and she was stripping before the door was even closed. Oh, and she also smoked a joint. In the office. She did buy the item though. Rihanna
LAWYER 08/02 **#9**
This A list mostly television actor who is also foreign born and very good looking recently ended a fling he was having with his co-star from his network show. He heard she was going to be fired and figured this would be a good time. Plus, his wife was starting to catch on. Henry Czerny (Conrad Grayson)/Ashley Madekwe (Ashley Davenport) "Revenge"
LAWYER 08/02 **#10**
This actress was almost A list. Mostly television. Then her hit network show was canceled. She still has a name, but does not work very much any longer. She had a photo scandal not that long ago and now it could get even more interesting. Her husband recycled two laptops that he did not think were working. The place he dropped them off sold them and the hard drives recovered. On the hard drive is our actress topless and using her hand on her husband. Yep. Lawyers are talking. I wonder if it would be a big seller. It is only a few minutes long.
LAWYER 08/02 **#11**
Before I even get into the details, I want all of you to know this will be revealed. It deserves to be. It needs to be. It is a sad sad tale. An actress, she thought she was going to be huge. She thought she was going to be a big big movie star. Everyone told her she would be. Agents and managers. Boyfriends and producers. Everyone wanted to be her and with her and she was golden. She listened to their words instead of words that wiser people told her. I used to know this actress. She was amazing. She did have that "it" quality. The thing is so do a bunch of other people in this town and they are willing to work for it. Our actress wanted it handed to her. Diva does not begin to describe her. Well, one very bad decision and our actress went from a nice solid B who was shooting for an A to an actress who is living off some perceived fame she had a decade ago and trying to make a living acting, but not doing a very good job at it. Sure, she makes enough money for the SAG insurance to kick in at the highest level. Good thing too. Since her fall from grace, our actress has enjoyed the company of booze, drugs and some really bad choices when it comes to men. Her sometime boyfriend also thought he was going to be an A lister. Everyone told him he would be and he believed them and had much the same tale as our actress. Our actor loved booze and drugs and loved throwing his weight around and loved throwing around women too. He loved nothing more than getting some coke and a woman and ordering her around for the night. It was inevitable that these two would hook up. Their drug crossed paths meeting several years ago. Both of them washed out. He was hanging on better than her. Guys can look rough. Women can't. Not in this business. Her drug use was just getting to that tipping point where there was no return. Neither of them had a ton of money, but at the time she still had looks. Not movie looks, but really good looks for the rest of the world. Escorting. He would set it up. At first she went through an agency and would give him some money and the rest was for drugs. They got tired of sharing money with the agency though so he took over. He ended up keeping most of it and would beat her if he thought she was holding out on him. Pretty soon her drug face was not even good enough for escorting. She was not street walker material yet, but she was offering 15 minute specials which is almost there. He would be in the bathroom or outside the hotel room door while she was with guys, to get his cut. The dealer was never far behind. The amazing thing is she did keep getting some roles. She does work. She is just not getting the roles she thought she would get. What keeps her working is that she is a very good actress. When the acting money runs out though, she is turning tricks and earning a buck and our actor is never far behind, always looking for his cut and still beating her if he feels slighted by her. Monica Keena/Edward Furlong
LAWYER 08/03 **#1**
This good looking B-/C+ list reality star from an A+ list reality family was on a date with a woman when he ignored her the whole date and chatted to other women and even got phone numbers from them. At one point when he had stopped chatting to other women he was overheard asking her whether they should go to her place or get a hotel room for a couple of hours after they ate. She said hotel room. I don't understand people sometimes. This will be revealed. Brody Jenner
LAWYER 08/03 **#2**
This married A+ list mostly movie actor was talking about how he had scored with his female co-star in just one week of filming his latest popcorn flick, but was never going to be with her again because she was so boring in bed. The reality is she turned him down and he was just trying to cover for her refusal. After she refused, he has even tried to get her fired from the movie. He wants a co-star who is into him.
LAWYER 08/03 **#3**
This B list mid-teens mostly movie actress says she is still a virgin. It is not because she does not want to have sex. She just says she is paranoid that her partner will take naked photos of her or tape them without her knowing it. She says she has reasons to be concerned because it happened to her actress sister. Everyone at school saw her naked.
LAWYER 08/03 **#4**
This A+ list celebrity who used to be a pretty popular singer and a horrible actress was talking to friends the other night about the time she hooked up with this A+ list mostly movie actor a few years ago. They had dinner and then went back to her hotel. Apparently the actor had way too much to drink because he was not getting up to speed so to speak and our celebrity started laughing when he wanted her to talk dirty because he had an accent and she could not understand him because he was slurring and she started crying from laughing so hard and he just got up and walked out and never spoke to her again. Jessica Simpson and Gerard Butler
LAWYER 08/03 **#5**
This foreign born A list mostly movie actor who is actually a great actor and great looking is married. He and his wife have always had an open relationship but they are splitting because he has basically moved on to be with someone that he and his wife once had in a threesome. He wants to keep the fun and sex going and his wife says she is ready just for them to be a couple and not be always looking for a third or fourth. She was never really into it, but did it so he would stay. Ewan McGregor
LAWYER 08/04 **#1**
This very pretty sometime model/B list singer/celebrity who has managed to come up with another very big hit song was on a flight yesterday when a 7 or 8 year old girl walked up to the singer and said that the singer was the girl's favorite singer and could she please have an autograph and photo. The singer, who was just playing on her iPad, told the little girl that she didn't sign autographs or pose for photos unless she is required to by her record label and that the little girl would probably just sell it on ebay and to leave her alone. Lana Del Rey
LAWYER 08/04 **#2**
This pap got a call this week to come take photos of this almost A list mostly movie actor and his "girlfriend." Twenty minutes later he got another call to come take photos of an A list mostly movie actor and his "girlfriend." He made them walk the same block so he would not have to travel all over to do it. Taylor Lautner; Jake Gyllenhaal
LAWYER 08/04 **#3**
This almost A list mostly movie actress who some people would call A list if they only watched one seemingly endless franchise went to dinner this week and ordered tons of food off the menu. Four or five dishes and then made a big show of telling the waiter how great everything was, but only took one bite of each. She did manage to drink about thousand calories of booze before she went to the bathroom and tried to get rid of everything. Apparently she is very loud when she vomits. I know, I know, probably TMI, but now you know her secret to staying the same skinny self she has always been. Michelle Rodriguez
LAWYER 08/04 **#4**
When this former B list celebrity and sometime remembered reality star who is now a C- list celebrity with B+ list name recognition was caught flirting with another woman by his significant other, this is what the significant other said to the celebrity. "You really think some woman is going to be interested in you? Yeah, you could get their photo in a tabloid, but who is going to put up with your chain smoking, bong hitting, can't stop eating, no job having, who has a ton of kids and will be broke as a joke if I leave." She said it way better. Apparently when you are screaming it, the point gets across more. Jon Gosselin
LAWYER 08/04 **#5**
This B list actress with the great voice and some of the best supporting roles ever usually plays sexy. Well, always sexy, even if she is playing a mom to a college student. Anyway, not too long ago she entered the dating pool after a long absence and she was having phone sex with a guy she had just started dating and she could hear him watching a movie that sounded familiar. It turns out he was watching one of her movies but he seemed to get more excited when a different actress was on screen. She asked him and he said he was more turned on by the other actress, but she was great too, but he was wondering if she could introduce him to the other actress. Our actress hung up. Jennifer Coolidge/Other girl: Shannon Elizabeth
LAWYER 08/04 **#6**
After a recent very big event, these two former co-stars had a little party in a hotel suite. The two co-stars are both probably B list. She leans towards B- and he is more B+ because of his hit television show. Anyway, one drink became two which became ten and the next thing you know it is the next morning and they are still drinking and think it would be a fabulous idea to get married. They did it more for fun than anything, but they still did it and it is still legal. Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny/Comic Con
Could it be that a certain ravenous and randy lad has posted his privates online? So say sources who claim that the mysterious member was liberated to land the single guy some no-strings-attached fun. The photo of his impressive appendage always confirms that the carpet does indeed match the drapes - a least the drapes that God gave him.
LAWYER 08/05 **#1**
This former A list mostly movie actor rarely acts any longer and just seems to spend his time doing his own thing which includes a lot of drugs. Still A+ list name recognition. Maybe even A++. He thinks he is an exclusive relationship, but his girlfriend still has sex with her ex all the time and is just with our actor because he spends money on her like crazy. Macaulay Culkin/Jordana 'Binki' Shapiro
LAWYER 08/05 **#2**
This C list mostly television actress made it to the Television Critics event on time, but she left early and was seen entering the hotel room of this married A list mostly television actor who was not only a co-star, but also was in one of the biggest television shows ever. When she emerged a few hours later, she was wearing different clothes. Our actor is a bit of a ripper.
LAWYER 08/05 **#3**
This A-/B+ list mostly movie actor is very well known and has close to A list name recognition. Great actor, but not that great of a person. His wife leaving him has really put him on a downward spiral. At what was supposed to be a meeting that could make him A++ list after such a long career, our actor blew off the first two appointments because he could not talk himself into leaving his coke. He finally showed up at a third appointment and was such a mess that there was no way anyone was going to offer him the part. The part requires someone to be in good health and looking good and that is not our actor. Josh Brolin (Batman)
LAWYER 08/05 **#4**
This A+ list mostly movie actress yelled and screamed with spit flying at an employee for an hour because she thought the employee was hiding her cell phone and what would be a very incriminating video of our actress. It turns out that she had the employee confused with one who had been there the day before. Our actress did not apologize and fired the agency that kept sending these people. This will be revealed. Halle Berry
LAWYER 08/05 **#5**
This forever always A+ list singer/celebrity has been undergoing tests because those close to him fear he has the beginning stages of Alzheimers. Our singer/celebrity is not that old, but has been forgetting lyrics and repeats himself constantly and has been snapping at his kids and partner almost non-stop. Elton John; Steven Tyler
LAWYER 08/05 **#6**
This former A list designer who is now just a funny name has been spending time turning tricks for cash. Not many takers for his talents though. He is too old and wants way more than he is worth. He says you are paying for the name. Huh. Richie Rich
LAWYER 08/05 **#7**
"Yes, yes, I know you have a cock and that you like looking at women with large breasts, but how about you help me with my bags since I am on a television show and she is probably a stripper or used to be or wants to be. Of course she probably would give you a more interesting tip." B- list mostly television actress on a hit premium cable show. Jennifer Carpenter
LAWYER 08/05 **#8**
This B- list mostly movie actress with A++ list name recognition has turned into a quiet lush. She got some practice in her last relationship where she could never be seen drinking in public. Ever. So she started drinking at home alone. The trend has continued. A messenger who has gone by her place a few times in the afternoon says the actress is already hammered by 3pm and wine bottles everywhere. Katie Holmes
LAWYER 08/05 **#9**
This almost A list mostly television actress spent a feverish 30 minutes in a hotel room with her male co-star. I guess that marriage of hers is one of convenience so people will stop whispering. The male paid $1250 for the night and the room was occupied no longer than an hour total. Kerry Washington and Tony Goldwyn "Scandal"
LAWYER 08/05 **#10**
This C+ list actress from an almost network hit show that is now buh bye was having sex with this A+ list movie and television actor up until a week or two before his wedding. They had been having a fling for almost two years and she thought she was going to get to be the next Mrs.
LAWYER 08/05 **#11**
This former B-/C+ list actor seemingly dated some of the most beautiful women in Hollywood when he really did not have much going for him. He would get them to do things that no one else could and it was not because of his limited amount of fame or good looks. Nope. It was because of his drugs. This actor, who appeared on some very hit television shows and was a co-star on one of them also was a huge drug dealer who provided drugs in exchange for sex and dates and there are a string of actresses and celebrities out there who have done the deed with this actor because of his drugs and his willingness to trade sex for them. He had a thing for reality stars and made sex tapes with at least four, two of which have been acknowledged. He also made a boyfriend of a celebrity watch him while he had sex with the girlfriend. It turns out that the boyfriend had the huge drug problem, and owed our actor a ton of money, but he made the entire debt go away after the boyfriend agreed to let his former A list reality girlfriend have sex with the actor and the actor's girlfriend. It was all taped. The actor's girlfriend then used the threat of releasing the tape to make several other tapes with the reality star's girlfriend.
This female celebrity found in the past month or so that she is having a baby . Congratulations! Sort of. You see, she is certain that her celebrity significant other isnt the father! Yes, she did travel to see her S.O. a few times while he was away on a project, but she knows that those dates dont coincide with the pregnancy. She also knows that the dates do coincide with the time she hooked up with an old boyfriend. She has been talking with friends about what she should do, but is leaning towards not saying anything to the S.O. and just letting everyone believe it is his baby. Fortunately for her, her S.O. isnt too good at math. Or calendars. Or anything else that requires thinking.
STREET KING 08/05
Its no secret that this 41-year-old national morning talk show host is a former NFL player, but what you may not know is his beard lives in the Bel Air home he bought while our blind item is secretly shacking up with with his Celebrity Fitness Club BFF [Dr. Ian Smith] in a New York City condo. Sources say our blind items Hollywood Exes beard is no stranger to his bromance lifestyle. Know why? Because shes doing nothing different from when she shared ex-hubby Eddie Murphy with Johnny Gill. Dont believe me.. Just ask our mystery mans ex-wife, Jean Muggli. You may recall Muggli spilled the beans during their divorce, back in 2006 telling how he cheated with another man, while they were married. Michael Strahan/Nicole Murphy
MUSTO 08/05 **1 - 5**
1. Which gay star and his man have indeed undergone some trouble in paradise--or at least an extremely open relationship? (The star had a hot, guilty fling with a friend of a friend of mine last year. Whoops. I wasnt supposed to tell that.) Zachary Quinto/Jonathan Groff
2. Which Oscar winner whos feuding with a music diva is also disliked by another singing star, who after spending an extended amount of time with the trophy holder, finds her such a trip she never wants to see her again? Gwyneth Paltrow/Madonna/Beyoncé
3. Which widely loved show biz lesbian who comes off like a total cream puff apparently treats her underlings like utter garbage? Ellen DeGeneres
4. Which long running music star and award winner lost a bundle by blindly handing money to new agey fortune tellers and chakra twirlers, the kook?
5. Which hip hop diva feels like a prisoner of her life, her schedule, and the controlling mob of business people who tell her what to do at all times? Nicki Minaj
MUSTO 08/05 **6 - 10**
6. Which recent NYC awards event hired seven fake paparazzi to hold up pretend cameras in hopes of making the red carpet look a little more gala? (Im pissed I wasnt invited to walk the carpet as a fake celeb.) Audience Choice Awards
7. Which socialite sisters were livid when they showed up at an event wearing the same couture outfit? (It was sort of like the "Paris Original" number from How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying, but not quite as hilarious.) Paris and Nicky Hilton
8. Which copycat designer was banned by a Parisian retailer due to her flagrant "homages"?
9. Which stylist was caught furtively ebay-ing gifts from her designer friends? (She should have gone the classier route insteadregifting them!) Rachel Zoe
10. Which heiress has gotten so disturbingly thin she's started shopping in the children's department? Allegra Versace
MUSTO 08/05 **10 - 15**
11. Which gay design duo are the cheapest shoppers on the planet, but unfortunately dont think price reductions are such a great idea when they sell their own stuff? Dolce and Gabbana
12. What screen legend is giving interviews about the tantric fulfillment shes found with her man, though in reality shes getting frisky and anxious to cheat?
13. Which gay pundit asked a friend of mine to go home with him and play with his "sex swings" and all kinds of other toys, five years ago at a resort town? (The guy declined. By the way, when the scribe talks about having dramatically calmed down, I assume that means since then.) Michelangelo Signorile; Andrew Sullivan
14. Which entertainment journalist is so desperate to be thought of as straight that he tried to pass off a female journo as his fiancée, even though the two have always been utterly platonic? (She was stunned when his parents were a little too thrilled to finally meet her.) Jason Kennedy and Lauren Scruggs
15. Which personality who wrote a show adamantly refused to make necessary trims despite the urgings of many sane people around her? (She insisted that every syllable was beyond reproach. Critics disagreed.) Kathie Lee Gifford "Scandalous"
MUSTO 08/05 **16 - 21**
16. Which actress playing a legendary gay icon had me host two talkbacks after performances, but turned into a shrieking shrew after the first one, chiding me for having blogged about what shed said--even though shed pronounced it to a full house and Id not only couched it all in superlatives, I framed it as a plug for the second talkback? (Good riddance, babe!) Tracie Bennett "End of the Rainbow"
17. Which new media titan has been spotted on the gay dating site Scruff?
18. Which Governor is rumored to have appeared in a porn video when he was younger? (But thats not the real scandal---its that it was straight porn!)
19. Which Bette Midler character was so much more vicious than she was portrayed on Broadway that if theyd attempted more documentary realness it would have come off like Pacific Rim? (If you cant figure this one out, your gay card will be immediately removed, along with your Kylie collection.) Sue Mengers "I'll Eat You Last"
20. Which offbeat female star fired a stylist for procuring her some multicolored male outfits rather than black and white ones she insists on? Janelle Monae
21. Which pop diva looking to be hot again has become a major pothead from the stress?
LAWYER 08/06 **#1**
This A+ list mostly movie actor had sex with a model he met in Europe last year. He had been drunk the night before and when he saw her in the morning he freaked out because of how young she looked. Apparently she was just 16. He thought she was much older because she is a lingerie model. The actor gave her all the cash he had which was like $2000 and ran out of the door. He didnt stop running and looking over his shoulder until he was out of the country and will not go back to the country ever because he is scared of going to jail.
LAWYER 08/06 **#2**
This A list celebrity/singer who I wish was D- brought home a woman this week that he met at a club. According to her, when they got to his place he made her take off all her clothes and then turned on his laptop and got on the computer with his ex and started yelling at her about what he got and turned the webcam on the woman he had just picked up who was naked and by now crying. He then told her to shut up and put on her "damn clothes" and threw a bunch of money at her and told her she could walk home. He then went back to yelling at his ex. Chris Brown
LAWYER 08/06 **#3**
This B+ list mostly television actress who was on a very hot show before striking out on her own has no idea that her big crush is married. He thinks he will get fired if he tells her since she is also his boss. His wife knows about the crush and loves her new husband having a job so pretends to be the dutiful friend whenever the actress is around. The actress is nuts over this guy. Mindy Kaling/Ed Weeks
LAWYER 08/06 **#4**
Apparently not happy with the way she has looked lately, this soon to be D list celebrity who is a B lister right now is back on coke. She thinks it will help her regain the form she used to have. It will also make her blow through the limited amount of money she has coming to her. I guess she missed coke, but couldn't afford it for awhile. Tara Reid
LAWYER 08/06 **#5**
This A+ list mostly movie actor, who is probably the definition of a movie star, was at an event last week. It was at a hotel and there was a LGBT convention or gathering going on. The actor was overheard in a hallway screaming in a whisper, "There are not going to be any gay people where we are going right? You know I can't stand gay people. No gays!!." When you think about it, you kind of just say to yourself how much it all makes sense. Tom Cruise
LAWYER 08/06 **#6**
This former almost A list mostly movie actress who is now a C and I guess a reality star now, made contact with this very wealthy B- list mostly television actor who she hooked up with a long time ago. Apparently she has some glamourized image in her mind of what their one or two nights were really like and wanted to hook up with him again. I'm not sure why, but the married actor agreed and they saw each other for a couple of hours late last week. Late at night. Probably just coffee right? Lindsay Lohan/Balthazar Getty
LAWYER 08/06 **#7**
This do everything actor/host/funny man who is probably best known as a B list mostly movie actor is about to announce his divorce. After almost two decades with the same woman he threw it all away for an almost A list mostly movie actress who is just a few years older than the relationship. This is not her first time with a married man, but, despite getting busted for it on two of her other films, she did it again on her most recent film and it has cost a marriage. The guy was an idiot. His wife has forgiven him before too. Chris Rock
LAWYER 08/06 **#8**
This A+ list mostly movie actor was out with his wife at a club this past week. They are not really the clubbing type as they get older and they do have kids. Apparently they like to get their freak on though because the wife dragged her husband to the bathroom where they had sex. I would never imagine this actor doing this, but he was. This will be revealed. Maybe he was excited his movie was coming out? Matt Damon
LAWYER 08/06 **#9**
This actor was almost A list a decade or so ago. He is still everywhere. Does lots of things. Great name recognition. Great face recognition, but does get confused with one other actor who looks a lot like him. Married to a gorgeous actress. Gorgeous. Anyway, our actor was on a plane and was recognized by his seatmate. The actor was ordering clothes from an online catalog and said they were for his wife. Last I checked his wife was about a size zero, and didn't have size 11 feet. I guess it is true that our actor loves women's clothes. Kind of makes his actress wife a little more hot knowing she has been married so long to the actor even though he has the kink. This will be revealed. Kevin Kline (looks like Bill Pullman)
LAWYER 08/06 **#10**
This former A list actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee and very good looking sat his wife down at a table for dinner and then proceeded to walk around the room talking to the tables which had either women alone or attractive women and the more attractive they were, the longer he spoke to them. When he finally returned to his own table he told his wife that she was very lucky to be married to him and that he could always find someone else. Richard Gere
LAWYER 08/06 **#11**
I love writing about sisters. Most of the time in Hollywood they get along. If they are both in the industry they do compete, but there are not that many cases where they don't get along. Now, if one is in the industry and one is not? Forget about it. They usually end up hating each other. Oh, there is one actress who used to be an A list tweener. She gets along with her sister because the actress sister buys all the drugs and introduced her to some guys the non-actress sister wanted to meet. One of my favorite sister pairs who hate each other also includes a former Tweener. Also A list. She is now a B-, but still has a high name recognition because of that former A list Tweener love. The non famous sister is a sometime actress, but, nothing that is going to make you ever possibly remember her for a role. Let us list the reasons why the non famous sister hates the famous sister:
1. Skipped bridal shower. Did show up at the wedding though.
2. Skipped bridal shower because she was having sex with the groom.
3. Had sex with the groom after the wedding. The groom left the bride thinking he was going to get to be with the famous sister who then told him she would get a restraining order if he came near her.
4. The famous sister wanted to go to Europe and didn't want to go alone. Less famous sister had just got a great gig. Famous sister called someone and got her sister fired. Yep.
5. Famous sister needed a boyfriend for the night for a premiere. Borrowed a guy non-famous sister was dating. Ended up sleeping with him. Ashley and Jennifer Tisdale
LAWYER 08/07 **#1**
This C+ list mostly television actress from a very very hit premium cable show met a guy three days ago at an art museum and within one hour was having sex with him in a restroom. This was a weekend. At an art museum. There were tons of families around and she dragged this guy in to a restroom and they had sex. Crazy. This will be revealed. Jemima Kirke "Girls"
LAWYER 08/07 **#2**
This former A list tweener and now just a jerk took a couple of women home the other night and once again had no interest in having sex with them. He tried to get them to do things with each other and they balked. he kept throwing money at them, but they refused. He ended up having sex with one of them and made the other watch and she had to pretend she was loving watching him. Justin Bieber
LAWYER 08/07 **#3**
This A list designer and sometime reality guy paid $250 to his waiter over the weekend to spank him. Put the waiter right over his lap and spanked him. No nudity, and everyone seemed to be having fun, but it was a strange thing to do in a restaurant at 8 p.m. Zac Posen
LAWYER 08/07 **#4**
This A++ list rapper and celebrity did not seem too worried about his marriage last week when he had the two bottle blondes brought to his suite and who stayed the night after a show. They left with $25K each for the night so they must have been doing something right and our celebrity was feeling very generous. Usually he is more of a brunette guy, so this is different. Jay-Z
LAWYER 08/07 **#5**
This almost A list mostly movie actor who would be a B- if not for one or two really good film roles, is not doing any press for his latest movie role because he is ticked off at the director because she never slept with him, despite his best efforts the entire time during filming. The guy can hold a grudge. He slept with plenty of other people on the set though.
LAWYER 08/07 **#6**
This former A+ list celebrity who will always be a B list just based on a body of work tried to force a family member to get an abortion just so he would not be embarrassed. The things he supposedly called her make Alec Baldwin's rant look like a sermon in church. The family member wanted the baby and ran away with money from other members of her family and did not come back until it was too late to get an abortion.
LAWYER 08/07 **#7**
This A list opera singer. Is there such a thing as an A list opera singer? Yes, within the world of opera they are A list. If you take them out to the real world, enough people know his name where he would be a nice solid B list celebrity. Right now he is being investigated by Italian police for having a string of 14-16 year old escorts that he hired and had sex with almost every night and were provided by a certain very high level Italian who has been known to have some hookers in his life. Andrea Bocelli/Silvio Berlusconi
LAWYER 08/07 **#8**
Great parents. It is already bad enough that the celebrity mom is on coke and boozes constantly, but now the dad is back on heroin. That poor kid. There are normal people in the life of the kid. They need to intervene.
LAWYER 08/07 **#9**
This B- list mostly movie actress with A++ list name recognition who is an America's sweetheart type is in crisis mode because she is about to be accused of home wrecking. This is not something the actress wants at all because she has the world at her feet and they think she is always the victim and want her to find love, but not as a home wrecker. This is not Jennifer Aniston. Think younger. Not into your 20's younger though. Katie Holmes/Luke Kirby (and within a week of this blind there were no more rumors and no more after work dates. Nothing. It was like it never existed.)
LAWYER 08/07 **#10**
This west coast Real Housewife is being treated for an eating disorder. Lydia or Taylor "Real Housewives of Orange County"
LAWYER 08/07 **#11**
This is not a particularly long or elaborate blind, but I wanted to give it the 10:10 spot because I think it is great what this couple has done the past few years. The husband is an actor. I always think of him as A list, but that is because he has been on television forever and was in one of my favorite movies that no one else ever watched. He has had the very good fortune of being on two very hit television shows and one of them is currently still a hit and on a network. His wife is an actress, and was way more popular than the actor when they got together. She does not act as much any longer. A few years ago they went to the manager of a grocery store and asked how much it would cost to buy the entire contents of the store. All of it. The manager gave them a number and the couple said they wanted to buy it all. The manager thought it was a great idea, but that he could not afford to let them take all his stock and that they probably did not need everything he sold. They came to an agreement and the couple ordered every item of food that was currently in the store. Canned goods to meat to produce. All of it. They also ordered every paper item and dish and cooking item. They then have done the same thing every year and donate it all to various local food banks and churches and homeless missions. All told they have spent well over $1M the past few years without anyone even knowing. Mark Harmon and Pam Dawber
This young, multi-talented female star has never been fat. However, like many people, she has gained and lost weight before, so there is definitely a familiar pattern as to where her weight gains and losses show. Shes gained about 10 pounds in the past couple of months. Not a big deal. But instead of it showing up in her face and neck or her upper abdomen like it usually does the weight gain is entirely in her lower abdomen. No one will question why she is only drinking water. But questions about a womans body are a little more personal and frequently go unanswered. We think shell be able to keep her pregnancy a secret for another four weeks. After that point, shell have to make an announcement or the bump will be gone altogether, with the loss chalked up to a healthy diet and exercise. We dont know what shes going to do, and, actually, neither does she! Who was she dating or sleeping with approximately three months ago? Was it a musician? Lindsay Lohan
LAWYER 08/08 **#1**
This former co-star on a hit network ensemble show who is not being invited back this season to the show is putting he full court press on this B- list mostly television actress from a hit almost network show. He thinks it will be good press and has her convinced he has given up his violent ways. He has not given up seeing other women though and had a sleepover with a woman right after he dropped off his actress date at her house when she would not go home with him. Mark Salling "Glee" and Nina Dobrev "Vampire Diaries"
LAWYER 08/08 **#2**
This A list mostly movie actor who gets by on his looks rather than his talent showed off his looks to a woman who was most definitely not his wife after he wrapped filming the other day. She was one of the people he signed autographs for earlier in the day. She handed him four condoms with her phone number written on them. Apparently it worked, because he called. Did take a call from his wife during though. Not very many more details because she is saving it she said for someone who will pay her. I don't pay. Channing Tatum
LAWYER 08/08 **#3**
This very quiet, seemingly shy A list singer who has at least one world record for a certain type of record sales went ballistic this week when he caught his lover with another person. As in, he went rock star ballistic. Smashed the guitar he had been carrying against a hotel room television and then smashed it against the walls and kept screaming, "you bitch" to his lover or the person with his lover. The person who was with his lover ran from the room naked and grabbed a robe and was out the door as quickly as possible. Josh Groban
LAWYER 08/08 **#4**
This A list mostly movie actor who comes from an acting family has been credited with saving the marriage of this female D list celebrity who used to be an A list celebrity and has the same body from back in the day. Anyway, she has been headed to divorce numerous times and she finally confessed to her husband that she wanted to see other guys but he did not trust anyone but the actor, who has been stepping in, and every few months has sex with the husband's wife. It is apparently a win/win for everyone and the husband still hangs out with the man he calls his best friend. The wife never joins them in public though. George Clooney/Cindy Crawford/Rande Gerber
LAWYER 08/08 **#5**
This A+ list mostly movie actor banished his current girlfriend from his vacation for one night because she refused to sleep with the host of the vacation. He allowed her to return after one night away so I guess she changed her mind. This is what happens when you have been famous and rich for too long. You get carried away with seeing how far you can go. This used to be a nice guy. Leonardo DiCaprio/Toni Garnn/Vladislav Doronin
LAWYER 08/08 **#6**
This former A+ list mostly movie actor who is an Academy award winner/nominee is married to a movie actress. She does pretty well for herself too. They are having a trial split which has had a tiny amount of buzz. The fact that he has had a string of barely in their 20's women come stay with him to comfort him is giving him a new youth and increasing his chance he is going to die of a heart attack. He still talks nice about the wife, but it is over. Did you know she never talks to the kid(s). Michael Douglas/Catherine Zeta-Jones
LAWYER 08/08 *#7**
This former A list singer/reality star and now just a C list celebrity trying to stay famous made a whole lot of people angry last night. Our former star was throwing back booze like prohibition was on the way back. On one of her trips to the bathroom she literally slammed into another table and knocked everything off, including an entire bottle of wine into the lap of a man. She didn't even say sorry, just kept stumbling to the bathroom. This will be revealed. Ashlee Simpson
ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 08/08 **#8**
This A+ list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee had a hooker over to his house and had sex with her while she was wearing his ex-wife's wedding dress. It gets better. He was watching their wedding video while having sex. Sean Penn/Robin Wright
LAWYER 08/08 **#9**
This boyfriend of an A+ list mostly movie actor who loves to pretend he is not in the closet was trying to use a credit card that his boyfriend had given him. It had both their names on it. The card kept showing as declined and the boyfriend kept screaming, I will kill his wife. I will kill her. So, if she ends up dead, the police should probably start with this guy. Just saying. Will Smith; John Travolta; Hugh Jackman
LAWYER 08/08 **#10**
This USA show B- list mostly television actor who is on a big hit for that network as a lead, did a header and gashed his forehead after falling from a bar stool at the place across from the E! building this week. About ten too many drinks because after the first ten, any are too many. Unless you are at home and in a low center of gravity. The paramedics came and treated him on the scene. Wisely he chose to not drive home. Matt Bomer "White Collar"
LAWYER 08/08 **#11**
There are a lot of crazy people in Hollywood. This former B list actress from a hit television show who now tries to make a living in independent movies has a bit of a drug problem. She also seems to have no morals that could possibly get in the way of making sure she has a good time. Over the past year, I have run into this actress numerous times as has AP (remember her?) and together we made a list of the best quotes from her that could also be turned into blinds. "Oh, I saw that movie (one of the most popular of all-time as far as fondness) one night and was talking about it to the actor guy I was sleeping with and he said his wife (made some very very big movies, but does not really act so much any longer) was in the movie. I had no idea he was married to her. I knew he was married, but not to her. They don't have the same last name, so how was I to know. " "I spent the entire time I was on set trying to look at his cock. I figured a guy that tall (A list mostly movie actor who has A+ list name recognition) had to have a huge cock. I think he thinks I was trying to sleep with him and I would have you know, because maybe there would be something down the road for me, but really, I just wanted a look at his cock. One day he finally said enough and he showed it to me. I have not been that disappointed since I went to ______________'s (A+ list singer/celebrity) house and she told me she had stopped drinking for the week and no booze was allowed." "That girl can act (Golden Globe nominee/winner B- list mostly movie actress from a big franchise). She is not much of a looker, but she can act. I think she might have some lesbian in her because she seemed pretty interested in me. It could also be that she was into me because she knew I had the best shit on set. There is nothing worse than filming in LA because everything runs behind and you sit in your trailer all day and if you don't have good shit you will go insane. That one guy from that one movie, you know who I am talking about. He is the old guy (B+ mostly movie actor who has A list name recognition and has been in over 100 movies and looks way younger than he is). With the funny name. Anyway, he was always coming over and trying to score some of my stuff and I would never have guessed he was into it. Of course he was also always trying to cop a feel. He kept moaning about his wife not giving him any and blah blah blah. Just come right out and tell me you want to fuck and if I get wasted enough you might have a shot, but not with that whiny passive aggressive stuff."
Former B list actress:
A list mostly movie actor with big cock:
Golden Globe nominee/winner B- list mostly movie actress:
old guy (B+ mostly movie actor:
Is this Diva for real? Shes not acting anything like what weve seen in the past. All of a sudden shes loud and ready to fight. Thats not the person we know. Is it all just an act for publicity? Kelly Price "R&B Divas: Los Angeles"
STREET KING 08/09
" Now I got tattoos on my body " Tupac once released "Illuminati all through your body" but todays leading lyricist is reported to have taken the triangle further. Thats because sources reveal our mystery man recently had an Illuminati sign inked on his body. Sources reveal this known sacrilegious rapper was inked-up in L.A., a few days after his Pasadena performance. Though we dont know the exact details behind the tattoo, we can tell you its not the first time hes been inked up. Dont believe me.. Just ask the Mrs who shares matching ink with our blind item. Jay-Z
LAWYER 08/09 **#1**
This C+ list celebrity moves up and down from an almost A to almost D depending on how much her family keeps her in the spotlight. It is never because of her own doing, these moves up and down the ladder of fame. She did make a name for herself the other night though as she had sex with two different celebrities at the same party within a couple of hours. The two celebrities are almost A list, and know each other very very well, but don't know they both had sex with her. This will be revealed. Ali Lohan
LAWYER 08/09 **#2**
This former A list mostly television actress who crashed so hard and fast to C list that all of our heads spun is now probably a B- list mostly movie actress who everyone knows. Everyone. Well, if you watched the television show or knew of it. Anyway, she pays her husband a monthly sum of money to stay quiet and to watch the child(ren) because she loves to be able to use the dating and wedding story in her interviews. In reality she has been practically living with a studio executive for the past year. Time with her child(ren)? The studio executive does not like kid(s) so our actress never hangs out with the kid(s).
LAWYER 08/09 **#3**
I don't know if this almost A list television and movie actor is into it, but he is dating and has been with his girlfriend for awhile, so you would think he would be into it or experimenting. She is a very well known and very well paid dominatrix. She is not just doing it for show either which makes me wonder about our actor. Maybe that is why he always dates women half his age. Jeff Goldblum
LAWYER 08/09 **#4**
"You are so small. My teen fantasies just went to dust." This B list reality star/television host when she accidentally walked in on this former boy bander turned reality star turned boy bander/host when he was naked in his dressing room.
LAWYER 08/09 **#5**
This C+ list mostly television actor who was on a very very hit network show until recently will probably drop down to D really quickly. He could barely hang on to B- while being on the show. Anyway, one of the reasons he was let go was his constant fighting with one of his co-stars. The reason? The better looking and nicer co-star once had sex with one of the more outgoing members of the cast who now has a serious boyfriend. The one who was let go thinks the woman was stolen from him. Not true at all, but that is how his crazy mind works and why he will probably do a lot of jail time in the future. This will be revealed.
C+ actor: Mark Salling
Nicer co-star: Chord Overstreet
Outgoing cast member: Naya Rivera
LAWYER 08/09 **#6**
This A list celebrity/singer who used to be A+ list is having a tough time staying sober. Oh, you never knew she had an addiction problem? That is because she does not share everything with her fans. No, she only shares the things that make her look good. She had plans to make an announcement when she was a year sober and pat herself on the back and tell everyone how easy it is, but she has not managed two weeks since she got out of rehab. Lady Gaga
LAWYER 08/09 **#7**
This NBA all-star who has never been in this space before better check those age of consent laws before he tries to bring that underage teen from Atlanta and set her up in a place on the west coast. The states have different laws about the age of consent. In Georgia, she is legal, but not many other places. Bringing her across state lines would be a no-no too. Oh, and what about your wife and all that promotional money that comes your way everyday? Risking it all for a teen?
LAWYER 08/09 **#8**
This former A list mostly television actress who you have to stop and remind yourself used to be the biggest thing on television and was everywhere walked up to this B- list actress and told her to stay away from her A list actor husband. Our former A lister knows what the actress tried to do. She knows how hard she was trying to hit on her husband and trying to set him up to be caught up in a scandal. Apparently our A lister knows a few things about the B- lister and said them right then and said the tabloids would be the next to know. Then our A lister smiled and walked away. Calista Flockhart/Harrison Ford/Amber Heard
LAWYER 08/09 **#9**
This C list mostly television actor was all over a woman most definitely not his A+ list mostly television actress girlfriend who has a history of guys cheating on her so they can get out of being in a relationship with her. This time though it is not just a break up that is involved. Brian Hallisay/Jennifer Love Hewitt (pregnant)
LAWYER 08/09 **#10**
"Oh, he is the one who is gay. Right? The one who sings. I didn't know he was gay. We went on a date. He put his arm around me on the red carpet and then never touched me again. We didn't even talk. He just smiled when he saw cameras. Lots of cameras. Lots of smiles. No cameras, no smile. Got waiter's phone number. He smiled then." B list reality star on a very hit network show who has been on the show since its inception discussing this former A list celebrity from a celebrity family during an interview.
LAWYER 08/09 **#11**
I have wanted to write about this person for sometime and have never got around to it. It really should be a movie because there is so much to say. I guess the place to start is that she was basically hooking for drugs at 15. That is a nice beginning. She got married to one of her better customers who also kept her turning tricks. She was expected to bring home other women for them to have and to work for him. Meanwhile he also beat her on an almost daily basis, but nothing visible to keep the customers away. He cheated on her with lots of other women and kept her hooked on drugs and to this day she is still hooked on drugs and booze and has just as much sex as she ever had before. The only difference is now that she is a B+ list reality star on a hit network show, she does not have to get paid for sex. She is happy to trade drugs for sex though because she loves free drugs. Oh, and if you have ever wanted to have a threesome or foursome with a person on a network show, then bring the coke and the people and she is your lady. Mary Murphy "So You Think You Can Dance"
They are not getting married. They are not planning a wedding. They are not engaged. In fact, they are not even dating anymore! Why even bother with the photo ops? Well, it helps publicize the project. Remember that in the celebrity world, 1+1=3. Two celebrities dating each other attract more attention than two individual celebrities alone. More attention = more publicity. More publicity = more money. But its all over. The flame of passion has died. Public appearances notwithstanding, this young celebrity couple is done. The truth is that he signed up for a relationship with a famous, All-American kind of girl, and she turned into an hyper-sexual urban wannabe. Not exactly wifey material. The announcement will probably be made on a Friday within the next eight weeks, and will be vague and friendly ("Too busy to give our relationship the attention it deserves. We remain the best of friends, etc."). Its not a total loss. Dating her gave him a big boost up in the celebrity world. Dating him made her more interesting and relevant. Now he can go on to a serious acting career, and she can go on to being a grown-up performer. Everybody wins! Miley Cyrus/Liam Hemsworth
LAWYER 08/10 **#1**
This A list mostly movie actor who seems to cameo in whatever you want him to show up in is married. He has had lots of affairs which would probably surprise those of you who are fans of him, and women and men love this guy. Always in popular movies. Has made several all-time classics and he is good looking and is an incredibly nice guy. He just likes to have sex with other women. Not so much women he picks up because he thinks that is the way to get busted. Nope. He prefers getting a hotel room, preferably a long way from home and then having someone who does not speak English come to his room and take care of him. This is a regular thing. Matt Damon
LAWYER 08/10 **#2**
Out shopping this week, this B+ list celebrity/talk show host/manager was not happy with the level of service she was receiving. As in, no one was paying her any attention because she was not actually doing anything but walking through the store. As soon as she saw someone, she stopped them and said the infamous don't you know who I am bit and demanded that someone walk around the store with her in case she decided to buy something. 45 minutes later she walked out without buying anything. NOT Kris Jenner. Sharon Osborne
LAWYER 08/10 **#3**
This B- list mostly movie actor, who is foreign born and made his fame in a franchise, split with his actress girlfriend because she caught him in their hotel room with this B- list mostly movie actress who was once his co-star. Jamie Campbell Bower/Lily Collins/Ashley Greene ("Twilight" series)
LAWYER 08/10 **#4**
This B list teen celebrity took off her only undergarments at dinner the other night and set them on the table and told her actor husband to put them on. He went to the bathroom and did just that and she made him show her right in the restaurant. Courtney Stodden/Doug Hutchison
LAWYER 08/11 **#1**
This married B list mostly movie actor who is an Academy award winner/nominee and probably headed to another one this year sent his wife home early at a premiere party recently and had different waitresses sit on his lap until he found one who wanted to be there. He did this in front of the high and mighty one who said nothing. Forrest Whitaker/Oprah Winfrey "The Butler"
LAWYER 08/11 **#2**
This A++ list diva and A+ list singer/celebrity was at dinner this week. She ordered dessert. She was informed though that another woman had ordered the last of the desserts right before our diva and sorry, but would our diva like anything else. The diva called over the manager and told him that if he ever wanted the business of our diva again that he would tell the first woman who ordered that she was out of luck. The manager refused. Our diva got up and walked out and said that no one from her family would ever patronize the place again. Two days later her A+ list celebrity husband showed up and dropped $50K at the place while snuggling with someone, most definitely not his wife. Beyoncé/Jay-Z
LAWYER 08/11 **#3**
This A list celebrity will always be A list. She is a singer and has one of the most famous songs of all time. She could make millions just singing that song. Anyway, you might be shocked to know that our uptight diva has always been a little plastic surgery hungry. Every few years she gets new boobs. A lift or a bump in size. Her lover loves them. Don't even talk to her about her husband. Talk about her lover. The guy, who is in the background more than Dolly Parton's husband. Anyway, our celebrity had some complications with her most recent surgery and got a horrible infection and for a month had one breast finished and the other not. Made for some hard costume changes because the prosthetic was always slipping and was visible in some costumes so the lights had to be adjusted.
MIRROR (U.K.) 08/11
Which kooky-looking female celeb has had a secret fling with one of the hottest married men on the planet?
Kooky-Looking Female: Cara Delevingne
Hot Married Man: David Beckham
Hot Married Mans Wife (may or may not be famous): Victoria Beckham
LAWYER 08/12 **#1**
Teen Choice Awards After Party: She certainly has grown up. This almost A list former child actress turned B- list mostly movie actress spent her time at a party alternating between having her boyfriend play with her breasts that she kept baring and getting egged on by the crowd as the still minor did shot after shot that she would drink after removing the shot glass from between her breasts with her mouth. Did I mention that she has a name people don't forget. Abigail Breslin
LAWYER 08/12 **#2**
Teen Choice Awards After Party: This actress is probably C+ list. Mostly movies. She is getting a chance at a huge popcorn flick this year. She was overheard telling some of her friends that she had taken the virginity of her male lead co-star and that he lasted about 30 seconds. She said this in not a good way. The guy is a nice guy, and would have thought given his past success that he was not waiting, but there you go. I always thought she was nice, but, apparently not so much which is kind of sad.
LAWYER 08/12 **#3**
Teen Choice Awards After Party: This Pretty Little Liars actress wins the award for most wasted of the night. She had a tough time choosing between coke and booze so went with both. Ashley Benson
LAWYER 08/12 **#4**
Teen Choice Awards After Party: This foreign born A list tweener celebrity/singer was probably the worst behaved celebrity of the night. At a party, the teen kept inviting women to sit on his lap. When one woman took him up in it, he said no, because he only wanted women in skirts and then lifted up his long shirt to show that he was out and about so to speak from his pants. Yeah. Positive role model for your teen, this one. Cody Simpson
LAWYER 08/12 **#5**
Teen Choice Awards: This one happened during the show. This former B list celebrity used to work for a major network. Now, she is still working for a major network, but not the one which made her famous. She is used to being the center of attention and was not happy last night as what she called, "fucking 12 year old girls who make more than me and getting in her way and that she could give a fuck about One Direction and all she wanted to do was to get someplace where she could quietly get drunk where people would be interested in her." She didn't have to go. Just because the awards were on her network. Did I say too much?
LAWYER 08/12 **#6**
Teen Choice Awards: They always said they are just friends and that they are nothing more. Sure, I could see friends trying to jam their tongues down the throat of each other. You know, it is the new way to help each other eat. It was pretty obvious to those that saw the pair that this B+ movie and television actor and sometime band member was all over this B-/C+ list mostly television actress. People have wanted them together for-ever. She is married though. John Stamos and Lori Loughlin
LAWYER 08/12 **#7**
These two co-stars got carried away last week. Our actress is A list. Mostly movies. Her co-star is an actor. B list. Mostly movies with a girlfriend who was all about the hit almost network television show and is now always looking for work. The co-stars hooked up. They got excited about the release of their project. Hopefully the A lister will not go her usual stalker route and her hookup can go back to his girlfriend with no one the wiser. Amanda Seyfried/Adam Brody/Leighton Meester
LAWYER 08/12 **#8**
This almost A list mostly television actor from a hit network show who is starting to make some really great movies was overheard telling some friends that his almost A list actress wife was laughing while she told him about the times she has cheated on him. Apparently she thinks as long as it is during filming it is fine and she thought he knew that. He didn't. Chris Pratt and Anna Faris
LAWYER 08/12 **#9**
This A list mostly movie actress who got her fame from television and movies has got so busy and so distant from her husband that the actress makes him call her assistant to schedule times to speak. She says she is really too busy to answer her own phone, even for her husband. I guess we will read about their divorce announcement soon. Katherine Heigl
LAWYER 08/12 **#10**
This foreign born former B list mostly movie actress who is still a B- and still has a really big accent was telling someone the other day that she dated this former A list mostly movie actor who used to be a heartthrob back in the day and is now a beat up, plastic surgery getting guy who still does get action gigs. Anyway, she said they only dated for a bit because he always wanted her to use this foot long toy on him. Yeah. She is a sharer. This will be revealed. Mickey Rourke/Bai Ling
LAWYER 08/12 **#11**
A few years ago, this actress made a very important decision. Apparently she chose correctly. Our actress used to be almost A list. She was on a very hit, long running, almost network show. She was always kind of the forgotten member of the cast because everyone else was always gunning for the press and publicity. Our actress just kept showing up and kept cashing all those paychecks. Well, the show ended and our actress found out that paychecks were going to be harder and harder to get. One day she strolled into her gym and got into a conversation with a C list celebrity who said her husband was working on a project and our celebrity was a huge fan and thought that her husband could also be a big fan and invited our actress over for dinner. Our actress went and just thought it was going to be dinner. It turned out to be a full court press by the celebrity wife and her A list mostly movie actor husband with A+ list name recognition. Our actress got a little tipsy and decided what the hell and went through with a little adult fun and the next thing she knew she had a very high profile, very high paying gig. Well, fast forward to the gig. Our actress looks good and she knows it and an A+ list mostly movie actor who is married started hitting on her and made it clear that he wanted to be with her. Our actress turned him down. Not because of him being married, but because she felt loyal to the guy who got her the job. Now, that decision is looking even better.
Actress: Charisma Carpenter
Show: "Buff the Vampire Slayer" or "Angel"
C list celebrity: Jennifer Flavin
A list Husband: Sylvester Stallone
A+ actor who hit on her: Bruce Willis (not in "Expendables 3")
This story is surprising, mainly because we would have never put these two celebrities together as a real couple! While they have worked together, there is a significant age difference between the two of them. They are both actors. She spent several years on a TV series, but is now a film star. He is a triple threat, but is best known for his current role on a popular TV show. The two of them were in Paris a couple of weeks ago. They were there for several days. They caused a bit of a commotion in their hotel for three reasons: First, because she was repeatedly going to his room in the middle of the night, knocking loudly and calling out his first name repeatedly until he would answer the door. Second, because they would then proceed to have sex that was so loud and crazy that several hotel guests asked to change rooms. And third, because they had a loud fight after the last sexual encounter, with their fight spilling out into the hallway and her crying and yelling, "I thought this relationship meant something to you! I thought that I meant something to you!" Beaucoup de drame!
Actor: Darren Criss
Actress: Kristen Wiig
STREET KING 08/12
This pop princess is suspected of having a split personality one male, the other female. Dont believe me.. Jut ask Rita Ora, whos said to know the other half of the "If I Were A Boy" singer all too well. Know why? Because Ritas threesome with our mystery lady, and her husband, reportedly turned to a twosome with our blind item wearing the strap-on. Were told during the 2003 filming of "The Fighting Temptations", she became a regular in Atlantas lesbian scene reported to have used her time off the set to hit the girl bars. Sources say she does the same whenever shes on tour, making her familiar with many lesbian bars across the country. Heres the drop: "When she was on tour with her dancers and gay stylist Ty Hunter, she made up the excuse of picking up the latest dance tips from the clubs when she was really picking up girls, sending Ty Hunter to get their phone numbers." She may front an image of innocence, but many dont know just like her female counterparts shes slept her way to the top. Now, can you guess which industry sista whose weave led to stunting her hair growth Im talking about? Beyoncé
LAWYER 08/13 **#1**
Apparently all the headlines and scandal is not enough to stop this B list celebrity/reality star from enjoying the company of women in the past week that are not his wife. One kind of looked like her sister though. Someone even said she might have been a look-alike for his sister-in-law. As a job, I mean, not just looking like her. Lamar Odom (sister-in-law: Kim Kardashian)
LAWYER 08/13 **#2**
This A list singer/celebrity was tired of worrying whether his cheating would get him publicly busted again and this time he is married so it would be even worse. There is no way he is going to stop cheating, but what he did was find two women and got them to sign confidentiality agreements and pays them a significant sum. One travels with him and one is in his hometown for when he needs some time away from the wife. Apparently there is a lot of that lately, despite all the smiles. Blake Sheldon, Robin Thicke, Michael Bublé, Jay-Z, Keith Urban
LAWYER 08/13 **#3**
"They just don't understand their place sometimes and you have to give them a tap. Sometimes more than a tap. I try not to leave any marks but if she asks about what I did the night before or who I was with, then it can get rough. If she does not like it, she can leave. There is the door and she can kiss the good life goodbye." Former almost A list mostly movie actor who has A list name recognition, but has dropped to a permanent B talking to one of his B list actor friends. Terrence Howard to Cuba Gooding Jr.
LAWYER 08/13 **#4**
This A+ list singer/celebrity/reality star better be careful. An ex has a voicemail recording from the A lister which is telling her that if she ever wants to hook up with him, to give him a call at a certain number rather than the one she is used to because his fiancee would be ticked off if she knew. He did this two days after getting engaged. Adam Levine
LAWYER 08/13 **#5**
A couple of years ago, this A list mostly television actor from a hit network show named Ashton Kutcher was at an award ceremony with his wife Demi Moore. Apparently this B+ list mix of television and movie actress who is well known by everyone and made her fame back in the day on television and has been in some really big movies took a liking to Ashton. So much so that when he got up to get a drink, she followed. Demi was oblivious. By the third time, Ashton took the hint and they found a bathroom and spent a good fifteen minutes doing the dirty. They went back to their seats and the actress spent the rest of the night speaking to Demi and ignoring Ashton. Jessica Biel
LAWYER 08/13 **#6**
This C list celebrity and sometime reality star who is the offspring of someone actually famous for something, and who did a lot of drugs was rushed to the hospital ten days ago after overdosing. Not an accident. Wanted to kill herself. Angela Simmons (father DJ Run, Joey Simmons or Rev Run)
LAWYER 08/13 **#7**
This is probably TMI even for a blind, but this former A+ list mostly movie actress who is still close to A+ was on the set of her new movie and kept complaining about itching. In the genital area. She stopped filming many times just because she could not stand the itching. She took a few showers, but was unable to make it stop and just carried on. She did make a phone call to some guy and let him have it. She thinks it might have been because of what they did the night before. Maybe something he had? Cameron Diaz
LAWYER 08/13 **#8**
This A list television actress on a hit network comedy is saying that one of her exes, who is also a former co-star is so not endowed that it is a good thing he is on a television show or he would not be getting any second dates. Does this mean she puts out on the first date?
LAWYER 08/13 **#9**
This former B list television actor from a very hit almost network show that was recently canceled was so bold this week about his drug use that he pulled out a bag of coke and was doing it at a bar. On the bar. Next to tons of other people. Ed Westwick "Gossip Girl"
LAWYER 08/13 **#10**
This former Disney star from a popular family says that regular sex does nothing for him any longer and that he only dates women who are into threesomes.
LAWYER 08/13 **#11**
A few years ago you could not turn on VH-1 without seeing this woman on the channel. With all the shows she was on and all the reruns each show had an the marathons, she was on there 24/7. At the time, she was probably an A list reality star if the list was judged by trashiness. All her shows were trashy. She was trashy. That did not stop her from cashing check after check. The problem for her was that her one big reality break ended really badly and since then she has tried to live off her name. No one remembers her name, they just remember her face when they are flipping through VH-1. If you said so and so from VH-1, that is not enough. She was memorable while she was being shown to us on a constant basis. She was supposed to get married a few years ago, but he ended up cheating on her and then she got hooked on drugs again and that wiped out the rest of her money and future job opportunities and ravaged whatever looks she had. The good news is that if you are in her area, she is having a special today for $50 for 15 minutes. You can call and ask her about her friend too. Megan Hauserman "Beauty and the Geek" "Rock of Love with Bret Michaels" "I Love Money" "Rock of Love: Charm School" "Megan Wants a Millionaire" (Ryan Jenkins was a suspect in the murder of Jasmine Fiore)
GOSSIP 08/13 (original post 08/09/13)
An award-winning actor was super proud during pride (Vancouver Pride, which was on 4th August) and is seriously considering coming out but was advised against it for now so as not to overshadow the movie. So what if the movie mounts a serious run at being a contender? Have fun with that one all weekend!
LAWYER 08/14 **#1**
This is going to cause a little strain in the marriage. This A list celebrity was supposed to keep his sex life private and not force his C list actress wife to answer any questions about their arrangement. She has kept her part of the bargain. She is loving being able to spend all the time she wants with her girlfriends. Quietly. Him getting busted having sex is going to cause big problems. Justin Timberlake/Jessica Biel
LAWYER 08/14 **#2**
This lead on a USA drama got into a fight with his significant other last night. The very good looking actor left the house they share and then proceeded to throw rocks through each of the windows, breaking them all, while shouting and using not kind words to describe his significant other. The police came, but didn't do anything because it was the actor's house and he could bust the windows if he wanted. They checked and there were no signs of physical abuse and just told the actor to keep it quiet or they would arrest him for disturbing the peace. One of the neighbors also complained to police that the actor and his significant other were having sex on the deck earlier and that it was disturbing. Seth Peterson "Burn Notice" (She said she found out when she was two months pregnant. That would have been right about this night)
LAWYER 08/14 **#3**
This former A list mostly movie actor who is now a B- and will probably be there forever because of his easy name has some issues. I'm not sure what his relationship is with his daughter, but she is an adult and when she sits on his lap and grinds on him at a public event while throwing her arms around his neck, it makes people really uncomfortable. The fact that everyone could see she was not wearing any underwear made things worse. Keith Carradine
LAWYER 08/14 **#4**
This A list singer/celebrity/member of the band is in for a nasty shock when he finds out his girlfriend, who is stunning, has been meeting with a writer once a week who is writing a definitive tell all about the singer who has shared a bunch of things with his girlfriend who copies them down and is delivering them to the writer every week. Adam Levine
LAWYER 08/14 **#5**
This former A list mostly television actress from a hit network show that was canceled and is now on a middling network series is being accused by a cab driver of calling him the n word. He says that when he got lost, the actress was talking on the phone and told whoever she was talking to that her n driver was an idiot and got lost. Considering who her boyfriend is and his known racist beliefs, this is not much of a shocker that the pair should join forces.
LAWYER 08/14 **#6**
This B- list mostly movie actor who has dabbled in television for his ex told the woman he was with last week that if he was going to have his first guy that he would be sober for he wanted him to be hot so the pair went to The Abbey and our actor ended up getting hammered out of his mind. He did pick up a couple of guys, but, will probably have to do it all over again if he wants to remember it. The woman made sure none of the participants took photos. She did say she took a couple, just in case she ever needs some funds in the future.
LAWYER 08/14 **#7**
This A list mostly television actress from a hit network show who also does a bunch of commercials might want to do some pop ins on her new boyfriend. Turns out he has a thing for the ladies and not just for our actress. He has had a thing for the ladies several times in the past few weeks. Kaley Cuoco/Ryan Sweeting
LAWYER 08/14 **#8**
This A list model who seems to be everywhere these days had to cancel a shoot this week because her cutting was so bad that no amount of makeup could cover the bandages she had all over her arms. An assistant at the shoot said it looked the model was a stabbing victim because there were so many cuts. At least ten. Cara Delevingne
LAWYER 08/14 **#9**
This former A list singer/celebrity turned reality show judge once turned down this A+ list rapper when he hit on her, not because he was married, but because she said she had seen photos of him naked and there was just no way that was going to happen. Christina Aguilera/Snoop Dog (Lion)
LAWYER 08/14 **#10**
This B-/C+ list mostly movie actress from a big summer hit earned $50K two nights ago by going to dinner with a guy. During dinner he told her he would pay her an additional $50K if she modeled in person for him what she wore in the movie. She said no until he placed the cash in front of her. She says no sex happened. Alice Eve
LAWYER 08/14 **#11**
This actor is foreign born. B- list. Mostly movies, but has a name everyone can remember even if they can't pronounce it. Good looking guy. Academy Award winner/nominee. Recently he went to a meeting and the person he was meeting was running late. No text, no nothing. Our actor was just about to give up when the man walked in and apologized but said he had been on the phone with some people because he was trying to help a family that had lost their house to a fire. The house was small and the family had no savings and the Red Cross refused to help them because it was just one little house fire. They had no place to stay and the man had been trying to find them some place to live. He did not have enough room for them, and was trying to find a hotel that would take the family of six and their two dogs. It was tough. Our actor said for him to handle it and within an hour had not only found a guest house of a producer in Beverly Hills that was available, but also called in favors from some clothing people he knew and had the entire family outfitted in clothes and had someone take them shopping for things they needed to live. Djimon Hounsou
There has been a settlement! No, were not talking about the settlement between The Husband and The Wife. Were talking about a much bigger and more interesting settlement the one between The Husband and The Star. The Star is paying off the cuckolded Husband of one of his many paramours to keep from getting dragged into their divorce proceedings. He had to. If he hadnt, the details of his questionable lifestyle would have provided fodder for the tabloids for months to come, and would have seriously damaged his professional reputation. Yes, this is more about protecting The Star than it is about protecting The Wife. In exchange for a large amount of money, The Husband will specifically refrain from talking about five main areas of controversy that were of concern to The Star: Money: The obscene amounts of money The Star makes and spends on everything, and how and where he invests his money. Business: The details of the business deals in which The Star has participated, and some questionable actions he took to close those deals. Drugs: The extensive use of drugs especially cocaine by The Star and The Wife. Sex: The Stars entire sex life, including, but not limited to, sexual preferences, sexual proclivities, participation in threesomes and orgies, swinger parties, involvement of other celebrities, sexually transmitted diseases, and abortions. Brother: The Stars Brother, who had a long-time affair with The Wife before The Star did. We do not know the exact amount of the settlement, but our source told us that its "Over 20." Thats over $20 million, folks. Thats the price of silence.
The Star: Simon Cowell
The Husband: Andrew Silverman
The Wife: Lauren Silverman
The Brother: Nicholas Cowell
LAWYER 08/15 **#1**
This C+ list actress who was B- when her hit almost network show was on the air, does not get to do much now. Well, she does have time for drugs. Lots of time. Too much time. She was at an event this week and her nose just started gushing blood because of all her drug use. It was an impressive amount of blood. Instead of leaving and giving up the paycheck, she stemmed the tide of blood and changed tops. It is a complete mismatch, but she got paid.
LAWYER 08/15 **#2**
This A list national news anchor has been paying his trainer six figures a year, and it is not just for training. Our anchor would like you to think it is just for training. He does not like to have to pay for sex. He just likes the fact that it was kept quiet. The trainer has been talking. Shepard Smith
LAWYER 08/15 **#3**
This A list singer/celebrity/wife has a long drug history. She likes to sweep it under the rug publicly, but it is there and will talk about it if pressed. What she won't talk about is the fact that she takes one of her old drug dealers on tour with her and how he makes a living supplying drugs to people she employs. Mary J. Blige
LAWYER 08/15 **#4**
This A list singer/celebrity has cheated on his actress wife lots of times. She knows it and pretends it has not happened. What she does not know is that one of the people her husband had an affair with is the wife's best friend. Well, probably her only friend. Well, is she really a friend if you are paying her to be around you? The friend is also a celebrity. B- list? Lots of celebrity friends who pay her. Gwyneth Paltrow/Chris Martin/Tracy Anderson
LAWYER 08/15 **#5**
This almost A list actor who is on a very hit network show and is unfortunately back in movies only cares about himself. That is not a shocker I guess. What is disturbing is the complete meltdown he had in a restaurant when he was yelling at his actress girlfriend because she had not watched his latest project yet even though she had it for a day. She told him she had been really busy working on her movie and had not had a chance. The actor said this was way more important and that she should have found the time. He has that whiny voice too. I'm shocked she did not break up with him right there on the spot. Ashton Kutcher/Mila Kunis "Jobs"
LAWYER 08/15 **#6**
This former American Idol top five finalist is about to make news again. She really does love dating married men. I believe this would be marriage number three she has helped destroy. Katharine McPhee
LAWYER 08/15 **#7**
This former B+ list mostly television actress from a hit network show dropped to C when the show left the air. She had finally started to regain some of her B-ness on a new hit show when her boyfriend convinced her to leave the hit show and guaranteed money for a chance to be a bigger star in his project. She has let guys make some horrible decisions for her in the past, but this is the worst.
Actress: Laura Prepon
Hit network show: "That 70s Show"
New hit show: "Orange Is the New Black"
Boyfriend: Chris Masterson
LAWYER 08/15 **#8**
This married aging female country singer who has made a career out of being in the tabloids says that the most fun she ever had in bed with was a guy about her age and his much younger former A list celebrity/singer wife who had several number one hit songs.
LAWYER 08/15 **#9**
This former A+ list actor who has probably slipped to A- because he has not been in much lately is a huge sex symbol. The foreign born actor is loved by everyone and has been in some of the biggest movies of all time. He recently split with a woman because she caught him having sex with her daughter. The daughter was legal, and they are still dating. That must be awkward at family dinners.
LAWYER 08/15 **#10**
This aging former B- lister who had a recurring role on one of the biggest network shows of all time and who also has been in some of the biggest and funniest movies of all times is getting older and still trying to live off his fame. He was trying to convince some strippers to give him a discount on lap dances and started reciting his entire filmography.
LAWYER 08/15 **#11**
You sometimes hear about people who are difficult to work with as they become a star. They change from a great person to a not so great person. Let me introduce you to someone who has never been nice to work with. I have never met one person who says she is fun to work with. I have never met anyone who says she is a pleasure to be around. I have never met anyone who says they would work with this actress again. You would have a tough time finding anyone ever in the history of Hollywood who has anything nice to say about this actress. Unless they have not met her. Or heard of her. Yeah, because if you have heard any of her stories, you would never say anything nice about her. She is from an acting family. B- list. Mostly television, although if she was smart, she would switch to movies because maybe a film could be finished before everyone wanted to run her off the set with pitchforks. She has been kicked off several television shows. Do you know how rare that is to happen once in a lifetime? It has happened to her multiple times. Why do you ask? See the paragraph above. No one likes her. She can't even walk down a red carpet without causing drama. This past weekend she refused to walk before or after several people because she felt she was above them and was afraid they would try and pose with her to capture her fame. On her most recent show that she got kicked off, the cast would go out Friday nights after work and congratulate themselves on making it through the week with her. She would of course never want to do anything with the cast because she had other plans that were very important and could not be canceled. The crew had a raffle to see who she would yell at next. They had to have a raffle sometimes four or five times a day because that is how often there were winners. The producers had heard of her reputation before hiring her for her most recent show, but she convinced them she had changed and matured. Nope. Granted, this time she would come out of her trailer and work even when she was angry. On one of the other shows she was booted from, she would stay in her trailer for the entire day if someone had offended her. It is quite possible she is the worst person ever to ever act. Katie Cassidy
GOSSIP 08/15 **#1**
This girl has been a star for many years, but her wild behavior as of late indicated that her problems were not just the result of having worked too hard or partied too much. Some originally speculated that her drug use had tripped off her irrational behavior. However, there may be a darker explanation. While there are multiple issues contributing to her behavior, one of the diagnoses she received when seen by doctors was surprising to friends and family. They were told that she has PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). The public explanation is that she is angry about having to work so hard since she was young. However, PTSD is not caused by hard work. Something happened to her when she was still a minor that resulted in this diagnosis. She was seriously assaulted by someone that she trusted. A police report was never filed, as it was thought at the time that such a scandal would irreparably harm her career. The whole incident was hushed up, and she resumed working, but she was deeply traumatized by the incident/s and angry that those around her didnt do more to help her. Those close to her are now talking among themselves trying to figure out how to get her help for this trauma while concurrently trying to figure out how to publicly explain the trauma in a way that doesnt make everyone around her look bad. They are really hoping that the media doesnt find out the details of the story, and that the girl can get well and start working again as if nothing ever happened. Amanda Bynes
GOSSIP 08/15 **#2**
This pretty star of a television series is finally pregnant with someone she really cares about. Good for her. Back when she was dating, however, she didnt want to take the chance of getting pregnant. A former boy bander whose group had several hits in the 1990s says that when he was dating her, she always made him wear two condoms. It was a good thing that she was careful, too. She was cheating on the boy bander (would he now be called a man bander?) with multiple guys the entire time she was dating him.
Actress: Jennifer Love Hewitt
TV Series: "The Client List"
Boy Bander: Rich Cronin
His Group: LFO
LAWYER 08/16 **#1**
This A list mostly movie actor is telling friends he is in love and found the love of his life and he has known the woman about three days. He has been non-stop texting her and calling her and has even blown off call times on the set of his movie just so he can talk to her. Every second he has not been on set he has been with her and the thing is, she has a boyfriend. She is just enjoying all this movie star attention. This is not going to turn out well, especially considering how much he has been drinking. Owen Wilson
LAWYER 08/16 **#2**
This former B list celebrity/reality star who worked her way up to A list celebrity because of her boyfriend is back down to B and slipping quickly. Apparently her new gig is not paying as much as she thought it would so she accepted the invitation from a man to spend a week with him on vacation. Our celebrity is in bad shape. She called a friend and said it is the worst week ever, but she feels trapped and has been doing as much coke as possible to numb herself. Stacy Keibler
LAWYER 08/16 **#3**
Do you think this A list celebrity/singer knows that her actor husband had sex with her best friend? I'm guessing no. Our A lister thinks it has been limited to the husband watching the A lister and best friend be intimate, and nothing more. Our A lister would be wrong. LeAnn Rimes/Eddie Cibrian
LAWYER 08/16 **#4**
I guess his A list celebrity/extremely good singer/Grammy winner wife and child were not even a glimmer in this B list celebrity's mind as he hit on every woman at a party this week. He got 10 or 15 numbers from women who didn't seem to care that he is married. He told some of them he was splitting with his wife and told others that they have an open relationship. He even told one woman that his wife had not had sex with him in almost a year. Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz
LAWYER 08/16 **#5**
This A list celebrity who used to be a pretty good singer/performer when she had other people's stuff to sing was on a plane last week. She started talking to the guy next to her and an hour later was taking care of him with her hand. It must have been good for both of them because they have not been apart since. This will be revealed.
LAWYER 08/16 **#6**
This former B- list mostly television actress turned celebrity/singer is not someone you want to date. Definitely not someone you want to marry. She got married once and told her ex that she would tell the world he molested children unless he agreed to her demands. In one of her relationships/marriages she told her ex that no one would believe him, given his past history that he had not beaten her everyday of their marriage and she got another huge check. In her most recent relationship, she discovered that her boyfriend was in big debt despite his status and dumped him for a millionaire who has no idea what is about to hit him. A few months of sweetness and a quickie marriage before the destruction begins. Jana Kramer
LAWYER 08/16 **#7**
This is a very disturbing story. A 14 year old teen who lives outside the country went into a police station last week with her parents to report that this A list mostly movie actor touched her and made her touch him. She and her parents were staying at a home next door to the actor and he invited them over to use his pool. The police said they would investigate, but nothing has happened yet. This comes from the wife of one of the policemen who was at the station that day when the teen came in with her parents.
LAWYER 08/16 **#8**
This B- list mostly television actor from a very hit network show who also fancies himself pretty good in a different profession (singing) was out with his girlfriend two nights ago and started yelling at her when she ordered dessert. "Didn't I tell you earlier that you are gaining weight? Stop eating." Matthew Morrison/Renee Puente
LAWYER 08/16 **#9**
This former A+ list mostly movie actress who is still A list and will always be an Academy Award winner/nominee would not give approval to photos that were taken for a photoshoot. She said that they made her face look like she had work done. Of course she just had work done, but didn't want it to look like it. Nicole Kidman
LAWYER 08/16 **#10**
This B+ list mostly movie actress who is only a B lister because of her name and talent and not because she has been in anything lately had to shave off her hair. A few years ago she lost huge clumps of it when she was really struggling with bulimia and it has never grown in right. She has tried everything, but is now just going to a full-time wig.
LAWYER 08/16 **#11**
This A+ list model is also a reality star. She is also a pain. A big pain. One of her favorite tricks is to try and get things for free by telling staff she is borrowing something and never returning what she borrows. It gets the staff in trouble and causes a huge drop in the bottom line and our model does not care at all. She is like that though. Not too long ago she walked into a store that an A list designer runs. It has a couture section where you can try on the one off dresses and get them made to measure. Which costs a fortune. Some of the dresses cost well over $100K. There is a small team in the store who are used to dealing with celebrities and the rich and the angry, but were still flustered when this A list model walked through the door. She went straight up to one of the staff and demanded that she give her the dress in the window (a one off couture piece). She said that the designer had called her and said that she should come in and pick it up. No one had told the sales assistant who started to get nervous. Our model was completely awful to her calling her stupid and started raising her voice saying that this was ridiculous and that the designer would be furious that our model had been standing there for five minutes without getting what she came for. The sales assistant decided to call the designer. As soon as she got through to someone our model started to laugh and said "Oh darling I was just kidding!!" and then she promptly left. Naomi Campbell
A Legend versus a Legend in the making. These two Ballers aren't seeing eye to eye. Is this a matter of friendly advice or bitterness? Or maybe, is a youthful Baller too arrogant to take some useful guidance?
Fans are totally freaking out about seeing this young male star shopping in a jewelry store with his girlfriend. Calm yourselves! When rich and famous people buy engagement rings, they do so behind closed doors in a private consultation with a jeweler who is known for wedding rings. When rich and famous people who are dating get publicly photographed looking at rings at the counter of a fashion jewelry store its a publicity stunt. It worked, too. After all, it got your attention, didnt it? Louis Tomlinson and Eleanor Calder
STREET KING 08/16
Long before this new mother of a baby boy married her Herb, she took part in threesome sexcapades with Tiny Cottle and Tip. Thats back when while T.I. was locked up our mystery lady also attended Tinys all-girl freak parties. Now, our blind item whos the Godmother of one of Tinys sons and Tiny are said to be not so lovey-dovey anymore. Know why? Because Tiny believes our blind item used her VH1 talk show platform just to get cast on "The Real." Sources say our Love and War lady didnt just bust it wide open for Birdman, but the So So Def founders father too!!! Just ask Michael Mauldins wife, whos reported to have delivered her with a beat-down outside of an Atlanta hotel. With her older sister now shacking up with her, shes said to be fearful her hubby might smash that. Thats because our secret singer used to smash her older sisters husband, when her sister was out in Las Vegas making the bacon for the family. Dont believe me.. Ask Keri Lewis. Im told our blind item and her sisters all have their licker license. Now, can you guess who Im talking about? Tamar Braxton
LAWYER 08/19 **#1**
This B list reality star from a very hit network show has problems at home. Big problems. Two women that our reality star slept with says that the reality star beat them when she was not happy with their performance in bed and accused them of being gold diggers and if they were going to be gold diggers they were going to be treated like it. Both of the women found out about the other and decided to take action when they discovered their similar stories. This is not new with this star. Abusive relationships are her norm. Jillian Michaels "The Biggest Loser"
LAWYER 08/19 **#2**
For the first time that I can remember, I heard something really nasty about this A+ list celebrity with A+ list name recognition. She does a lot of things, but one she does not do very well made her the most money. Other than being married to her A+++ list celebrity husband. Anyway, she has said previously that she only wants normal sized models to appear in her fashion line. Normal meaning like average people. A person new to her staff did just that and lined up a bunch of normal sized models. Average people. Our celebrity went ballistic and told him that stuff was just for the press and her line would look stupid if they trotted out a bunch of people who looked fat in her clothes and they are made for people size 0-4 so they need size zeros plus one person who is a size four to make themselves look good. Victoria Beckham (didnt sing very well, but made most money as Posh Spice)
LAWYER 08/19 **#1**
This C list celebrity dropped off her A list celebrity mom with A++ list name recognition and then went and snorted lines of meth off the floor of a restroom this weekend because there was no other place to do it without being caught. This celebrity is going to end up dead. I don't know if her A list parents don't realize it or just have their heads in the sand. Everyone else knows it though. Restroom floor? You know you have a huge problem.
LAWYER 08/19 **#2**
This A+ list mostly movie actor is aging and has never liked his fans or appreciated his fans and age is not going to change him. He believes his fans are a nuisance and that if he could be rich without them he would. He doesn't like them and has no respect for them at all. Case in point. Our actor was walking back to his hotel in NYC after promoting a movie he wants them to see and ignored every fan who approached him. At his hotel there were about 50 people waiting for him and he had nothing to say to any of them and ignored them and pretended they did not exist. This is him every single day. Harrison Ford
LAWYER 08/19 **#3**
This Academy Award winning actor who now works in television got the shock of his life this past week when an A list mostly movie actor was talking about the depraved things he made some woman do in bed for him when the Academy Award winner realized that the A lister was talking about the A lister's daughter.
LAWYER 08/19 **#4**
This A list mostly movie actor from a huge franchise, and I mean huge, backhanded his wife over the weekend. She said something to him which no one quite heard, but everyone saw the backhand to the face. They did leave together a short time later. Bruce Willis; Christian Bale; Sean Connery
LAWYER 08/19 **#5**
This A list reality star is back on the coke again. I bet they don't film that though, will they. That employee stopping by your place everyday, sometimes two to three times a day is not fooling anyone. I guess they will take the fall when they eventually bet busted. I hope you are paying them well.
LAWYER 08/19 **#6**
This actor is C+ list. I am giving him C+ because of his looks, otherwise he would be D. Whenever he does show up in a movie or on a television show, or if someone runs into him in real life they never fail to say that he is the best looking person they have ever met. Known for one great role which gave him his fame, it stretched from television to movie. The other day several women were hitting on him when he spied an 18 year old teen. Our actor excused himself from the women by saying he was in the mood for some boy that day, but to talk to him the next time he was around. Jason Lewis (Jerry "Smith" Jerrod/"Sex and the City")
LAWYER 08/19 **#7**
This A list singer/celebrity/reality judge is trying to make amends. When crew members first saw her when filming started, they didn't say anything to her. When she asked one why they were not talking to her, they reminded her that last time they filmed she had specifically ordered that no one was to speak to her or look at her unless spoken to or looked at first. Our celebrity said that was the old her and this is the new her. Probably not booze that is making her so friendly, because I heard she gave that up. Pot? Adderall? Christina Aguilera "The Voice"
LAWYER 08/19 **#8**
It took a few years, but this A++ list celebrity who has been known to dabble in singing and reality television and other projects started cheating on her guy. Well, it actually started once before, but got cut off abruptly by some scandals on the periphery of her life which caused increased pap presence on her. So, that one ended. This one though is hot and heavy and sexy and the guy is in his early 20's and is one of those guys who loves working out. He was a model for one of her projects and apparently she spent 20 minutes one day touching his chest because she could not believe it was real. Gwyneth Paltrow
LAWYER 08/19 **#9**
This Academy Award winner threw on a brunette wig last week and got up on stage at a strip club. Danced down to her panties and then gave a lap dance to her boyfriend. They then got up and left. This for sure will be revealed. She is getting a little kinky these days. Good for her. Renée Zellweger
LAWYER 08/19 **#10**
This non-married A list reality star glomming onto people who are not even his family was spotted talking to a waitress at a bar this past week and kept touching her breast. She would remove his hand and it would go right back. She finally called over a manager and the reality star gave the manager a few hundred bucks and got himself a waitress who would put up with his groping. Scott Disick
LAWYER 08/19 **#11**
It seems that about once or twice a year, there is manuscript floating around the publishing world that is full of good gossip. This one would be considered great gossip. I mean really great. It is written by an offspring of an Academy Award winner/nominee. The other great thing is the nominee/winner is still alive to see it written. We are not talking about things from way back in the past, but instead, are talking about things in the last five years. For the purposes of this blind, lets call our nominee/winner NW. Let us call the offspring SW. Makes the whole pronoun thing easier. NW had a threesome with SW and another woman. NW watched SW have sex with women on multiple occasions. NW showed SW sex videos which contained women NW had sex with and also, SW's mom and another woman. Oh, there were also two videos which showed SW's relative touching herself. There were hundreds of these tapes and some had some of the most famous women in the world. many were hidden cameras and many were shot with the full knowledge of the participants. There are drugs mentioned on every page. It is the ultimate tell-all. After this book, there would be thousands of stories that could be written about everything that is inside. It is explosive.
STREET KING 08/19
This four-player is being revealed as a dude who likes to rock make-up, and he once shared Nivea with Weezy. Dont believe me.. Just ask dudes BFF Eugene Sheep Dog Smoak, whos said to have been in the jeep of our mystery man and is reported to have mistakenly left his eyeliner behind. Heres the drop: "They borrowed my ex-boyfriends jeep to go to Blu Cantrells record release party. The next day, I took the jeep to run errands. I found an eyeliner pencil in the jeep and flipped out on my ex cause I thought it belonged to another bitch. ________ later confessed to me that he uses eyeliner pencil for his eyes, and sideburns and to make his mustache darker and perfect." He was discovered by "The New Atlanta" reality star Jevon "Vawn" Sims. Now, can you guess who Im talking about? The-Dream
There is a public battle going on now between a very famous female performer and a male blogger. While both are telling their "versions" of the story, we have the real back story for you the one that neither party is ever going to tell you! The two used to be very good friends until the blogger started privately telling the performer to get help for her substance abuse problem. Yes, the performer is an addict, and a serious one at that. But, like most addicts, she was in compete denial about her problems, and she hated the blogger for telling her the truth! She warned him that if he didnt shut up about her problems, that she would cut him out of her life. The blogger stopped confronting the performer personally, but did go to a third party to discuss the performers issues and to ask for her help in encouraging the performer to go to rehab and perhaps staging an intervention. The third party is a very famous female singer who is friendly with both the performer and the blogger. The performer found out that the blogger and the third party were discussing her problems behind her back and went ballistic! She not only cut the blogger out of her life, but she started making nasty comments about him to anyone would would listen. The blogger was very hurt and retaliated by critiquing the performer on his blog. The performer eventually did go to rehab, but she did not admit it publicly, pretending instead that she was taking several months off due to an injury. Whatever. So, the bloggers persistence did pay off in terms of her eventually getting the help that she desperately needed but their friendship was lost in the process. She is now out of rehab and working again. However, she still hasnt forgiven the blogger for his confronting her about her addiction, as well as for his private disclosure of her condition to the other singer. Meanwhile, he is trying to cope with the very public backlash from her rabid fans, who dont know the back story and who blame him for the performers angst!
Performer: Lady Gaga
Blogger: Perez Hilton
Singer: Katy Perry
1. This action star regularly spent nights doing cocaine and discussing conspiracy theory til dawn with his dealer, the dealer claims.
2. "One crack-using actor kept trashing hotel suites in Maui," one dealer told the National Enquirer. "Finally, we partied on a private beach, where he held an orgy one night." Charlie Sheen
3. One dealer claims this C-list actress with an A-list spouse regularly requested full-body massages after getting her cocaine delivery. Portia de Rossi/Ellen DeGeneres
4. This C-list celebrity got his B-list singer girlfriend hooked on heroin and ruined her career, his dealer claims.
5. This reality star demanded cocaine from strangers at a house party during a night out of town away from the prying eyes of his significant other.
6. This aging disco diva recently missed a big-bucks appearance after having cocaine delivered to her Vegas hotel room, a dealer claims. She locked herself inside with her stash and refused to come out.
LAWYER 08/20 **#1**
This B- list mostly television actress has pretty much stayed in that position for her entire career. Sometimes she moves up slightly, but she has always been consistent and has been on one television show after the other. Some hits and some misses. She told producers she would walk off the set of her current show and quit if they attempted to make her a lesbian. Acting or not, she is dead set against it and it goes against her values. Angie Harmon "Rizzoli & Isles"
LAWYER 08/20 **#2**
This married president of programming for a Christian television/radio network who is also their on air personality is having an affair with this aging, but still gorgeous B list mostly movie actress who also brings another surprise to the table.
LAWYER 08/20 **#3**
This D list celebrity has a money making opportunity and feels like it slipping out of his hands because people are keeping him from his A list celebrity money making relative. Well, potential money making relative. He would have to persuade her first. He is good at that. Lucky he is not in jail. Might be the reason they are keeping her away from him. Randy Jackson/Paris Jackson (molesting her)
LAWYER 08/20 **#4**
This A list celebrity/singer wistfully told her ex it just was not the same having to pay to dress a man in women's clothing when she had him doing it for free. Christina Aguilera/ex-husband Jordan Bratman
LAWYER 08/20 **#5**
This forever and ever A+ list mostly movie actor sent back two escorts to an agency he is using in NYC this summer because the escorts told him they were older then 29. That is a huge no no to our aging actor. The LA agencies know much better than that. He does like them to be older than his youngest kid, so that is a good thing. Of course this will be revealed. Jack Nicholson
LAWYER 08/20 **#6**
Last year I told you about this former almost A list mostly movie actress who once starred in a huge franchise. She had got herself some breast implants because she hated the way she looked topless in a movie. Well, she loved her new breasts so much that she has now gone up another size. She is up to a large C which looks ridiculous on her tiny frame, especially considering she still thinks people have no idea. Yeah, you took magic beans. Kirsten Dunst
LAWYER 08/20 **#7**
This A list mostly movie actor, who would love to win an Academy Award after years and years of comedies before getting serious and quirky was wasted on the set of his new movie the other day and was a disaster. He was yelling and swearing at everyone who crossed him and he threw his drinks and coffee at others and refused to come out of his trailer and sat in there in his underwear all day drinking from a bottle of booze. He is an angry angry drunk. Bill Murray
LAWYER 08/20 **#8**
This B list mostly movie actor who is in some trouble lately was out shopping the other day when he ran into some women. He decided to hit on them and one of the three women seemed to take an interest in our actor. At one point she asked him whether he would ever hit her. He replied that he would only if she got out of line. She seemed satisfied with his answer and made plans for that night. Seriously people. I just don't get it. Terrence Howard
LAWYER 08/20 **#9**
This former B list mostly movie actress was all set to take a break from the hooker circuit this summer because there just was not enough time to land a big fish. They get taken in May when Cannes hits and by this time, your only hope is if they have dumped someone. But, lo and behold, there was so much renewed interest this summer in her that instead of taking a pay cut or getting no one, she actually is charging double and getting way more customers than she can handle. She is open for something long term though. Tara Reid "Sharknado"
LAWYER 08/20 **#10**
This sometime actress/sometime comedienne finished talking to this B list mostly movie actress with much higher name recognition and came back to her friends and called the actress a fucking Nazi and is glad her parents didn't have to meet the actress.
LAWYER 08/20 **#11**
You have been really good at the blinds lately so I thought I would really throw a challenge at you. How would I describe this person? Funny. C list Celebrity. Not in the sense of a Paris Hilton celebrity, but someone who has actual talent. She has a lot of talent actually. Award winning in her profession. She is great at her profession. She wanted to take it to the next level. She was tired of having to travel 200 nights a year and only getting on television a few times each year. She wanted to be big. She wanted to be huge. At first she tried sleeping with this former A list mostly television actor and his television actress wife. Yep, she was their threesome sex toy. Then someone told her she was not attractive enough so she spent $50K on plastic surgery. She would talk smack about people she thought were ahead of her line for some big project and would do everything she could to sabotage them. She would spread lies about them or anyone she could. She would do anything that it took to get ahead and to make herself a star. She sold out and still it has done no good and she is pretty much in the exact same position she was a decade ago. Sure, her name is known maybe a little more, but, overall, all of the things she did, all of the moral boundaries she crossed had no effect at all on her life, but destroyed the hard work of lots of others.
LAWYER 08/21 **#1**
This former reality star has not been on a show in some time, but because of who she is and her family is, she still has A+ list name recognition. Apparently she is also yours for the night if you get her drunk enough. Five nights in a row she got wasted. Three of those nights she went home with a different guy. Hope she used protection otherwise her next reality show is going to be Maury. Now that would be a great episode of television. Bristol Palin
LAWYER 08/21 **#2**
This almost A list mostly television actor is in a new movie. He told his actress girlfriend that because he was going to be doing a press tour and promotional work that there would be women all over him all the time so they should take a break and reevaluate after the tour. The actress agreed and five minutes later the actor was with someone new, because the actress called him back and he said he was kind of busy at the moment. Nathan Fillion "Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters"
LAWYER 08/21 **#3**
This almost A list mostly comedic movie actor who has been the star of a few movies has a dark side. His ex-girlfriend, who managed to stay with the actor for a few months says he is great when he is sober, but when he drinks he becomes violent and he backed her into a corner several times and grabbed her and slapped her and threw her to the ground, but then would immediately apologize. They broke up because he was starting to drink almost every night, so the violence was happening almost every night. Jonah Hill
LAWYER 08/21 **#4**
This B list actor from a hit CBS drama that has initials in its name met a woman in a bar. They left the bar and hooked up in his car. They started driving to his place. While he was driving, they were taking turns doing blow. She started having a seizure and passed out. He left her on the side of the road on a bus bench and drove away. She lived and has been calling him everyday, but he pretends he has never spoken to her before.
LAWYER 08/21 **#5**
This B+ list singer/celebrity seems to be fading a bit. Her drinking is well documented and apparently she also enjoys getting three or four of her backup dancers to service her orally several times each day. The ones who do so all have a special trait. Ke$ha
LAWYER 08/21 **#6**
It took a couple of years, the story has finally come out why this A+ list mostly movie actress hated her former co-star who is an A list mostly movie actor who sometimes heads up to that A+ territory. It turns out that the actress was being her usual demanding and condescending self and the actor went up to her on the second day of filming and went on a rant about how he knew she was stuck up and a bitch and that she had cheated on her husband with her therapist and that he wasn't the first guy, but that she tried to make her husband be the bad guy (which he is too), and just went off on our actress for 10 solid minutes right in her face. The rest of the shoot was a whole lot of fun as you can imagine. The two never spoke except during filming. Reese Witherspoon/Vince Vaughn
LAWYER 08/21 **#7**
This A list celebrity/athlete who is going through a lot right now and is quite the ladies man used to date an A list mostly movie actress. No, not that one. Before her. Yeah, now you have it. Anyway, the pair broke up because she had a miscarriage and he blamed her for it. Not a very sensitive thing to say and he had accused her also of getting pregnant to grab onto his money. He is a real joy. A-Rod/Kate Hudson
LAWYER 08/21 **#8**
This B+ list mostly movie actress is a fairly new mother. She does not seem all that concerned that the actor father of the baby smokes meth around the kid. She is not dumb enough to leave him alone with the kid though.
LAWYER 08/21 **#9**
This actor is B- list. Maybe a B. Mostly movies. Foreign born. A very, very good actor. Apparently he is back with his celebrity ex, or at least as back as he ever gets with anyone. She was with a B-/C+ list mostly television actor but went back to the movie actor because as she put it, "He has a dick that goes on for miles." Michael Fassbender/Zoë Kravitz/Penn Badgley
LAWYER 08/21 **#10**
Not the typical form of Kindness blind, but, if I had been there, I would have thought it was kind. This Academy Award winner/nominee mostly movie actress was in a bar and bought a round of drinks for everyone in the bar. $2500. She then did it five more times. By the fifth time, the people ordering knew she was buying and were ordering crazy expensive drinks so that round came to $10,000. Total bill for the night was about $40,000 and this is an actress who makes a good living, but not $40K in one night kind of living. Melissa Leo; Marisa Tomei
LAWYER 08/21 **#11**
Let me start out by saying this will be revealed. It is just too good to not reveal. This actress is A+ list. Mostly movies. She likes to think of herself as cultured and someone who wishes to be thought of as more than just an actress. Our actress travels a lot. She often travels without her significant other. She always travels without him when she is working on one of her favorite side projects. This is the one she thinks will make her beloved around the world. The reason she always travels alone for this particular side project is a man she met. He is an artist. He is much older than our actress. 20-25 years older than she is, and an intense man. Known throughout the region for his very dramatic and bold art, he is also known as someone who lives his art and our actress wanted to meet him. Once she met him, she wanted to be in one of his art works. This involved our actress getting naked. She was then covered from neck to toes in hot wax. The wax was dripped in a design for the "art." He then proceeded to have sex with our actress while the wax was cracking. Apparently he does this with all of his muses. Well, our actress enjoyed being his muse and can always be spotted with the artist whenever she is on her side project, and she has even had him visit her once at her home. Once. Angelina Jolie/Julian Schnabel
Which quirky director, producer, and actor played the hero by saving the life of an Ohio tourist? After coming upon an elderly man who had fallen in the street and wounded his neck, this eccentric actor sprung into action, stopped the bleeding, and kept the man calm until emergency services arrived. While he downplayed his role in helping the injured tourist, we think he may be destined for an against-type leading role in the next superhero blockbuster. John Malkovich
Surprise, surprise! A leading man dropped in unannounced to an acting schools commencement ceremony. He spouted wisdom from on high about everything from making friends on set to taking risks to landing a part in a speech that left grads gushing that he was "inspiring." Sounds divine. Thankfully, he was wearing pants. Tom Cruise
The management of this group has been pushing for the last year for somebody anybody! in this band to get engaged. They tried to force one of the guys to get engaged earlier this year even though he was actually in the process of breaking up with his girlfriend! He totally balked at the publicity stunt, and management was forced to back off. We told you about that event while it was happening. We also told you that management would not let go of this notion, and that they would try again. Some of you fell for the recent ring shopping bit of another band member who is definitely not getting married to his girlfriend. As we told you in another blind, that whole setup was fake, too! But good news for the management team! One of the boys finally did pull off the engagement bit. Congratulations to the happy couple!
Forced Guy: Liam Payne
Forced Girlfriend: Danielle Peazer
Ring Shopping Guy: Louis Tomlinson
Ring Shopping Girlfriend: Eleanor Calder
Engaged Guy: Zayn Malik
Engaged Girlfriend: Perrie Edwards
WRAP (By Stretch, the Limo Driver) 08/21
I cant tell you how many times I had seen her on TV singing the National Anthem or stepping onto a red carpet out the open door of some other guys limo. And now this Grammy-winning diva was sitting in mine. Every day. Theres nothing better for a driver than a regular booking -- and this one was five days a week. From 10 in the morning until 10 at night, taking one of the most famous women in the world from her home in the Hollywood Hills down to the soundstage in Culver City where she was rehearsing for her big comeback. She needed to be in performing shape for her tour. She needed to be able to go hard in front of 15,000 people for two solid hours and more. Not to mention that she had to lose 20 pounds. Thats what her agent had told her. Thats what the producers of the worldwide tour had told him. The show included 10 expensive costumes. And none was bigger than a pocket square. People cant begin to understand what kind of pressure the hugely talented artists of this towns creative community have to live with. "Ill never lose the weight," she said late one night when I was taking her home. She burst into tears. She had pushed herself to the edge of exhaustion after all the meetings, the rehearsals, the fittings and the fasting. She didnt think the tour could be saved. I felt like a civic duty was calling me to be more than just a limo driver when the survival of an American icon was in the balance. So I said, "Have you ever heard of SoulCycle? Its a spinning workout. Full body. Super intense." "That wont help," she said. "I never learned how to ride a bike." I told her the bikes are stationary at SoulCycle. She wouldnt fall off. The only thing that would fall off was the weight. So we hit SoulCycle on Sunset Boulevard for an hour every night on the way home. I watched her work out. The music boomed and the lights flashed and she pedaled like the superstar we all know. Three days before she was supposed to fly to Japan for her first concert, she got into my backseat. The sweat was dripping off her from her SoulCycle workout. For the first time in weeks, she had a big smile on her face. "I just weighed myself," she said, "and guess what? Ive lost exactly 20 pounds." I felt like Id just saved the Statue of Liberty or something. She was toned, with rock-hard abs. "I bet you could win the Tour de France," I said. "What?" she said. "Its a famous bike race around the outside of some country in Europe," I said. "No, I mean, I cant hear what youre saying," she said. "Talk louder." I started to explain again, when she stopped me. "I cant hear your voice," she said, starting to look a little flustered. "I cant hear a word." She put on her headphones and cranked up the volume. "I cant hear myself singing," she said. She fiddled with a few buttons and tried it again. "I cant hear." She started to panic. "Im deaf! I cant hear a sound! Im deaf!" she shouted. The last couple weeks have been doctors and psychiatrists and lawsuits and TV cameras and insurance companies and legal depositions. Everyones pointing fingers at my client. How could she let hundreds of millions of dollars go to waste. And how could she all of a sudden go deaf like that. She must have been on drugs or something. Thats what theyre all saying. But I think I know why. The other night, passing through West Hollywood, I parked the limo and walked into SoulCycle. I found the manager. I told him that as great as the spinning workouts are, they probably ought to turn the music down just a little. Its no good losing weight, if you also lose your hearing. Mariah Carey
LAWYER 08/22 **#1**
For the first time in almost five or six years, this former almost A list television actress who was in a very hit show for a very long time and now tries to make movies was not at the Golden Globe kiss butt party last week. Despite never being in anything much, she was a regular at the party because she was having sex with a member of the association and did it so she would get nominated if she ever did get another good role. She was ticked off last year that she did not get nominated even though it was a small role in a smaller project and broke it off with the guy after having sex with him at least once or twice a month for over five years. Did I mention the guy is married? Eva Longoria "A Dark Truth"
LAWYER 08/22 **#2**
This former NBA all-star and now a national television analyst has spent almost $500K in one year on one stripper he has tried turning into a girlfriend, complete with no mention of her past profession. If she is such a girlfriend, I'm not sure why he continues to pay her almost $50K a month to be his girlfriend. Shaq
LAWYER 08/22 **#3**
This B list mostly television actress who is on a hit premium cable show has been pressuring her boyfriend of three weeks to get married because she thinks it will help her during awards season if she can walk red carpets with her new husband. I don't think you fully appreciate how truly off her rocker this actress is. The reason she previously got divorced was that she cheated, but then was hoping for a People Magazine cover to talk about how she was healing. Emmy Rossum
LAWYER 08/22 **#4**
This B+ list mostly movie actress who shot to fame on a great network television show and a franchise she still plods through was at a club this past week. She and her girlfriend got into a fight. So, our actress starts hitting on other women and the next thing you know she and the other woman are in a bathroom in the VIP section of the club and the girlfriend of our actress is screaming, trying to get in. Security escorted the girlfriend out so the actress could have some peace. Michelle Rodriguez (This was not her long term girlfriend at the time, but someone she had been with for about a week who she was referring to as her girlfriend)
LAWYER 08/22 **#5**
This A list mostly movie actor was making out and groping some woman in a corner of a Vegas hotel the other night. The woman looked scarily similar to the actor's sister. So much so, that the person who spotted the actor had to do a double take because he thought something really juicy was going on. Well, the pair are close, so it would make sense he would find someone who looks like her. Just as long as he is not calling her sis in bed or something. Joaquin Phoenix
LAWYER 08/22 **#6**
This former A list mostly television actress who has not matched her earlier success with her last few television attempts sent the same sext message to about 20 women who work on the crew of her show looking for a third for a last minute threesome she was having with her actor boyfriend. Courteney Cox
LAWYER 08/22 **#7**
This brand new reality star as of last night called his gay lover last week to tell him that he was going to be on the show, and please don't ruin it by saying anything to anyone. He wants the world to think he is straight. Kanye West "Kris"; "Derek Hough "Family Dance Off"; James Franco "James Franco Presents"
LAWYER 08/22 **#8**
This actor is probably B- list and that is only because of a franchise that seems to keep him in the public eye just when his latest attempt at television stardom becomes another flop. His wife is extremely open minded when it comes to sex, but our actor thought that it only worked one way. He freaked out when his wife told him point blank she was sleeping with other men and women. The actor thought he was the only one allowed to do it and is not happy. James Van Der Beek
LAWYER 08/22 **#9**
This former B list celebrity/singer who used to have A+ list name recognition is down to a C in every category, including crack. The singer recently lost any hope of any kind of visitation after he decided to give his barely into teens son a hit off dad's crack pipe. All happened in a foreign country. A non-English speaking country. Rhymes with Mance. Cee Lo Green
LAWYER 08/22 **#10**
This actress is B- list if you are into cable television and C+ if you just remember her big big budget bomb that still spawned sequels, just not with her. One of her A list co-stars on that big budget flop is married. Our actress says she spent the night with him the night before his wedding when his bride to be thought it best they spend the night apart.
LAWYER 08/22 **#11**
Some quiet phone calls have been made over the past few weeks. The female porn star that tested HIV+ has been known to have some flings with men for money as a beard and for other things too. One of those men is a closeted B list mostly television actor who was on a very big hit for this almost network. Our actor and the porn star engaged in unprotected sex a few times in the past two months, and now, the actor, is having to make calls to lots of guys he has been seeing over the past few months. Our actor, although mainly into men, does not mind a roll in the hay with a woman, especially if they are going to be bearding for him. He thinks it makes their relationship look more realistic. He does not usually engage in protected sex with them, and people are running around frantically setting up tests and trying to do so discreetly and our actor is trying to remember names and phone numbers of guys that he met on chat lines and text lines about the situation and there is so much buzz being generated by him about all of this that he might end up being forced to come out just because there are so many people he has sex with on a weekly basis.
Porn star: Cameron Adams (Bay)
Actor: Chace Crawford
Which "unlucky in love" celebrity might not be quite as jinxed as the stories suggest. A redtop (United Kingdom tabloid newspapers) was offered graphic footage of the star being "pleasured in a jacuzzi at the Playboy mansion". The tabloid never used the footage...no doubt entirely unrelated to this is that the star can often be found sharing whatever news she's got with the tabloids. Cheryl Cole; Kelly Brook
These two are almost set to walk down the isle, but sidejawns (Girl or guy you have relations with on the side of your real relationship. But you wouldn't want your main jawn to know anything about) keep gettin' in the way. She's waited a while for her man to come through. Will those talkative side pieces mess it all up? Gabrielle Union/Dwyane Wade
This photogenic couple did a photo op in the past couple of months that their fans cheered about. They were a fantasy couple to many when they worked on an acting project together, and it was a shippers dream come true to see them looking so happy and comfortable together. Well, the fantasy is closer to the truth than many realize! The two actors recently took their families and went on a tropical vacation together. Their kids had their rooms. And the actors had their room. Room, singular. Not rooms, plural. The truth is they really are a couple! David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson
STREET KING 08/23
Todays blind item turned to a high demand industry jumpoff, following her split from one Black Skin Head. Know why? Because this Flower isnt just a pro with a strap-on, shes also up to par with top group sex and dominatrix skills. Dont believe me.. Just ask Reggie Bush. Sources tells us this freaky Floral female uses her anus to consume ecstasy and molly to increase the pleasure of backdoor activities. Just ask Amare Stoudemire. Aside from the rappers shes known to be connected to, theres a list of other celebs shes reported to have busted it wide open for (and/or stickin her strap-on to) including Eddie Murphy, Young Jezzy, Chris Brown, Akon, Puffy and Cassie. But, theres one lyricist who were told she stepped to, only to be turned down Jay Z. Just ask Tata. Our domineering mystery woman recently married her "well-trained slave" whos said to follow all orders she puts down. But that doesnt mean she follows suit. Know why? Sources say while she sniffs white lines in their home, hes forced to take his weed -smokin outside! Now, hes being dubbed a girlyman, expected to soon be seen in skirts. Thats because were told hes got a secret fetish for dressing in drag. So whats her fetish? An insider says "makin punanys purrr." Dont believe me.. Just ask Madonna or Adrienne Bailon. Amber Rose
LAWYER 08/23 **#1**
What B list female national news anchor with the interesting name was trying to hide in a corner of a hotel lobby. She was texting furiously before finally getting to see the man she had been waiting for. Definitely not her husband. Could it have been innocent? Sure, but holding hands to the hotel elevator and her grabbing onto him tight, is probably not that innocent. Coming down 90 minute later all untucked and still a little sweaty, or wet from a shower, also probably not that innocent. Soledad O'Brien; Mika Brzezinski
LAWYER 08/23 **#2**
This former almost B list mostly movie actress who is now a C- gets paid extra from guys to use her fake accent from the one hugely memorable role she had. This actress makes way more money from being with guys then she ever did making movies. If you bring your own drugs, she will give you a big discount though. Shannon Elizabeth (American Pie)
LAWYER 08/23 **#3**
This blind took place in a group therapy session. I believe they are sacred, so would normally not even have a blind about what happens there, but apparently this still young, A-/B+ list mostly movie actress also discussed it with members of the group and some of their friends (who had not been in the session) outside therapy at a crowded restaurant. She says she is messed up and the reason is that an actor family member would get wasted and molest her and this happened until she was in her early teens.
LAWYER 08/23 **#4**
This A+ list Academy Award winner/nominee is moving over to television and told his co-star that he thought it would be best if she stopped calling the paps every time she left her house so when they go out to talk about their new show that it will be fresh and exciting and people won't feel like they see her every second. And guess what? They are no longer speaking. This should work out well. Robin Williams/Sarah Michelle Gellar
LAWYER 08/23 **#5**
What former female brat pack member spends most of her day inside at her house waiting for the various delivery services to come by with her pill prescriptions. Our actress, currently is taking about 50 pills a day and is barely recognizable from her days in some of the best movies ever.
LAWYER 08/23 **#6**
You have never seen in-laws get along as well as these two, except they are not in-laws yet. He does not have many friends. He is kind of in lock down mode and doesn't get to leave the house much. When he gets a new stash of Bolivia's finest, the first person he calls is his future celebrity sister-in-law. She appreciates it just as much as he does and if she happens to sometime sit on his lap while she does it that is ok right? It is not like he has married her A list celebrity sister yet. Ashlee Simpson/Jessica Simpson/Eric Johnson
LAWYER 08/23 **#7**
This C+ list celebrity/mostly movie actor who is probably more famous for the size of his cock more than his acting, does have really high name recognition. Lots of people know the name, but no one is quite sure what he does except for that franchise thing. Anyway, he says has a sex tape he loves showing and is having a special party this weekend where he is showing it one more time featuring this male B- list celebrity/singer.
LAWYER 08/23 **#8**
This A list mostly movie actor used to be A+ list, but his box office numbers are starting to slide. Not trying hard enough or just too focused on finding his next transvestite? The married actor likes them very large, everywhere. Will Smith
LAWYER 08/23 **#9**
The husband of this #1 bestselling author says that as much as she talks about sex and writes about sex, that you would think they would be having lots of sex. Nope. Once every few months he said, if he is lucky. E. L. James "Fifty Shades of Grey"
LAWYER 08/23 **#10**
This former almost A list mostly movie actress has not been in anything for a long time. Nothing. Just dropped off the map from almost A to nothing. Poof. Gone. Some say it is a case of stage fright and that she can't be in front of cameras any longer, but there is a more sinister theory also out there involving her husband.
LAWYER 08/23 **#11**
A little something different today. I am going to give you the crazy half of a celebrity sex pairing, and you have to come up with the other half. Think things like Madonna and Dennis Rodman or Madonna and Jose Canseco or Madonna, damn she had sex with a lot of strange guys.
#1 - Paris Hilton and this A list mostly movie actor who is having a tough time keeping the A+ list he had after his franchise ended. Robert Pattinson
#2 - Lindsay Lohan and this A list mostly movie actor who had sex with her before she even turned 18. I think she was 17, but it might have been 16. No one has ever been able to confirm it for sure. Oh, and he is an Academy Award winner/nominee. James Franco
#3 - Tila Tequila and this aging Academy Award winner who has always been known as a ladies man and will forever be A list. Apparently he ran into her at a Lakers game and someone told him that he should invite her over to his place. She stayed a week. Jack Nicholson
#4 - Anne Heche and this Academy Award winner/nominee who also will always be A list hooked up at the height of her craziness. He has said he had no idea what was going on and that she was "way too advanced for him." Probably makes his actress wife thrilled that she gets to have sex with him. Harrison Ford (Calista Flockhart)
#5 - Jessica Simpson and this A+ list celebrity/rap star hooked up after he was brought in to maybe help her with some songs when she was thinking of going in a new direction. She made a confession to him and one thing led to another and they spent all night together. They did end up recording one track together which has never seen the light of day. I don't know if he told his celebrity wife about it. Jay-Z (It was before he married Beyonce)
#6 - Zac Efron and this B+ list celebrity/singer hooked up. As crazy as she is now, she told him that she was a virgin at the time. He is totally not her type but she had a crush and used everyone she knew in the industry to get his number. Demi Lovato
You probably know by now that there are some nude photos of a young female pop singer that are being shopped around the Internet. We have the photos. Yes, its Poppy. Yes, shes naked. Youll probably see them soon enough. After youre done staring at them, youll want to hear the interesting backstory about how those naked photos "leaked" onto the Internet. It involves a whole bunch of celebrities and a couple of fame whores. That "leak" was no accident, and three people are going to go down for it. There is a group of young Hollywood celebrities who well call The Seven Celebrity Dwarfs. What the Brat Pack was to the 1980s, the Seven Celebrity Dwarfs are to this generation. They are all good-looking, young performers who have worked together, partied together, and/or dated each other at some point. Lets meet six of The Seven Celebrity Dwarfs:Poppy is a cute, female pop singer. Shes had some struggles in the last few years, but has still managed to put out some hit songs and land a solid TV gig. Lucky is Poppys ex-boyfriend. Hes a cute boy bander who isnt shy about stripping down for the camera. Although Lucky and Poppy broke up a few years ago, they are still friendly. Lucky has dated half the young starlets in Hollywood, including Clingy, a very famous singer. Clingy is a pretty, female pop artist. She writes her own stuff. That stuff is usually about one of her ex-boyfriends. Clingy and Lucky had an odd breakup during a short telephone call a few years ago. Of course, Clingy wrote a song about it. Sassy is Clingys best friend. Sassy is gorgeous, sweet, and a true triple threat. She is currently on a successful tour and has a pop song near the top of the charts. Twerky is another multi-talented performer. She had a hit TV series, and her own song that is currently on the top of the charts. Twerky has been quite controversial lately and has taken some real risks in trying to make herself look more mature. Twerky is best friends with Poppy. Flexy is Luckys brother. He is also a singer and an actor. Flexy has dated Sassy and Twerky. So
Poppy and Twerky are besties.
Clingy and Sassy are besties.
Lucky and Flexy are brothers.
Lucky has dated Poppy and Clingy.
Flexy has dated Sassy and Twerky.
Got it so far? Good. There was an awards show last week, and most of the Seven Celebrity Dwarfs were there. Before the show, everyone was saying hello to each other and thats where the trouble started. Most of it was caused by Luckys current girlfriend, a drug-addicted nobody from another country who well call Junkie. Junkie is only dating Lucky because she wants to be famous. She is too old for Lucky and a bad influence on him. Junkie was looking to score celebrity friends for herself and a celebrity boyfriend for her sister, who well call Horrie. Junkie proceeded to launch herself at celebrity after celebrity in her quest. Junkie first spied Chappy a cute, British boy bander with a thick head of hair and begged Lucky for an introduction. Lucky and Chappy are friends, and Chappy came over to give him a bro hug. Then Junkie practically threw herself at Chappy! She hugged him and repeatedly tried to kiss him. She draped herself over him and told him that ever since he had dumped Clingy, that she wanted to fix him up with her sister. Chappy was terribly uncomfortable during this entire exchange and tried to pull himself away. He doesnt like talking about his relationship with Clingy, and he really didnt want this strange girl kissing and hanging on him! He practically had to pry her arms from around his neck, and nearly tripped running away from her. Junkie then tried to ingratiate herself with Twerky. She pretended that they were old friends and tried hanging all over her. Twerky was more skillful than Chappy about running away from Junkie, complaining to one of the other Dwarfs, "Who is that girl with Lucky? Who the fuck does she think she is? Why is she getting all grabby with me?" Then it was time for everyone to be seated. Poppy and Flexy (who are just friends) performed at the show, and they were seated in one of the front rows. Sassy was next to them. Lucky and Junkie sat in the row directly behind them. It was a really awkward seating arrangement, because everyone had dated everyone. Lucky used to date Poppy and was now dating Junkie. Flexy used to date Sassy, who was best friends with Clingy (who had dated Lucky). Like we said awkward. But all the Dwarfs have been performers for many years, and they all know the drill. Smile, be cordial, be professional. Junkie didnt get the memo. She didnt care who had dated who. She just wanted to ingratiate herself with as many celebrities as possible. Junkie totally sucked up to Poppy and Sassy during the event, cooing over them and telling them how talented and pretty they were and how she hoped that they would become the best of friends. Junkie seemed to have this idea in her head that the two brothers and all their ex-girlfriends and her should be a group. Oh, and that they should invite Clingy along, too! "We should really ask Clingy to hang out with us, too. After all, everybody knows that Clingy lost her virginity to Lucky, so we all really ought to be friends!" Jaws dropped.We dont know exactly how many people heard Junkies comment about how Clingy lost her virginity, but the disclosure certainly surprised them! After all, at the time that they were dating, Lucky was wearing a purity ring! And everyone assumed that Clingy had lost her V-card to a wondrous older singer! Given this revelation, its no wonder that Clingy was so upset about her breakup with Lucky in a phone call that only lasted a few seconds! Anyway, Junkie continued blabbering on and insisting that they all hang out together. Sassy who is besties with Clingy gritted her teeth and sweetly blew off Junkie. Poppy also politely declined, saying that she was going to be traveling out of the country to do some charity work. Junkie perked up. She asked Poppy if Poppys boyfriend another celebrity was going to be going with her on the trip. Poppy said no. Uh, oh. Now its time to introduce the final member of the Seven Celebrity Dwarfs: Slimy. Slimy is Poppys current boyfriend. Slimy is an actor who is best known for his role on a sitcom that ended several years ago. You might also know him as a hard-partying skirt-chaser and the ex-boyfriend of several Hollywood starlets. The list of things we dislike about Slimy is long. There was the pregnancy scare he had with a 15-year-old cast member on his former television show. There are the numerous girls that he introduced to "the back door" (his preferred style since there are no more pregnancy scares that way). There is the closet full of costumes that he asks his conquests wear that he never washes the stains out of between uses. There is the occasional bruising smack that he will dole out if a girl irritates him. And, of course, there is the alcohol and the drugs and the cheating and the like we said, the list is long. Slimy is way too old for Poppy and a bad influence on her. Frankly, Slimy is bad for everyone. In other words, he was perfect for Junkies sister, Horrie! Like Junkie, Horrie is a nobody who wants to be famous. So Junkie and Horrie hatched an evil plan. While Poppy was out of the country, Junkie would fix up Slimy with Horrie. Then they would then leak to the tabloids that Slimy cheated on Poppy! They could get Poppy and Slimy to break up! Then Horrie and Slimy could date, and Horrie could become famous! Poppy left on her trip and Slimy promptly slept with Horrie. Big surprise there. In fact, Slimy hooked up with Horrie for several nights in a row last week. Of course, Poppy had absolutely no idea what was going on! She thought that Slimy who sent her such loving public messages on Twitter while she was away was being a good loyal boyfriend! But then something unexpected happened. During one of their nights together, Slimy showed Horrie his cell phone. Slimys cell phone just happened to contain some very personal photos. "OMG! There are naked photos of Poppy on your phone!" "Everybody has naked photos of their celebrity girlfriends on their phones." "Like who?" Slimy told Horrie about Pantsy, a very famous young pop singer who has trouble keeping his pants up. "Pantsy has naked pics of Sassy on his phone. But he would never release them, because she would never speak to him again." Releasing naked photos could break up a couple? What a great idea! Horrie called Junkie and told her about the photos of Poppy. Junkie instructed Horrie on how to steal the photos. They had to act quickly, while Poppy was still out of the country. Within 24 hours, Junkie and Horrie had made a collage of the photos, and began shopping them around. They knew that even if they couldnt sell the photos, the the gossip blogs would pick up on the story. Their first stop was a gossip blog to which Junkie had frequently sent pieces of gossip about her boyfriend Lucky and his family and friends. Of course, they picked up the story right away. It was all perfect. Junkie and Horrie the two evil Fame-Seeking Sisters could ensure the breakup of Poppy and Slimy, not just by disclosing Slimys philandering, but by leaking private photos of Poppy as well! Poppy would be seen as a slut, Poppy would think that Slimy did it, and they would definitely break up! Then Junkie could date Lucky, and Horrie could date Slimy! What a beautiful foursome they would make! What great photo ops! Junkie and Horrie would be famous! Two sisters who date two celebrities! Famous, famous, famous! Except weve just spoiled their little plan. Even if those photos get published (and they probably will), everyone will now know that Slimy cheated on Poppy, and that the leaked photos came from his phone. They will also know that Junkie and Horrie are the devious witches behind the photo leak. They used Lucky, they used Slimy, and they tried to screw over Poppy to claw their way to fame. Slimy, Junkie, and Horrie: The wrath and the fans of multiple celebrities are about to rain down on you. Youd better run and hide. Run and hide.
The Seven Celebrity Dwarfs:
Poppy: Demi Lovato
Clingy: Taylor Swift
Sassy: Selena Gomez
Twerky: Miley Cyrus
Flexy: Nick Jonas
Junkie: Blanda Eggenschwiler
Horrie: Blandas sister
Chappy: Harry Styles
Slimy: Wilmer Valderrama
Pantsy: Justin Bieber
LAWYER 08/25 **#1**
That didn't take long. This B list mostly television actress from a hit television show who would die if you cast her in a movie had a recent relationship end. It was not as strong of a relationship as she would lead you to believe and had basically already moved on. She is hanging out with her ex, quietly at his place almost every night. This will be revealed. Eva Longoria/Ernesto Arguello/Eduardo Cruz
LAWYER 08/25 **#2**
This A list mostly movie actress, who has an outside shot at an Academy award nomination this year likes to Skype with her friends. She is never in the same place as them and it keeps them close. One of her best friends is a B-/C+ list mostly television actress with not many other things you remember. The pair Skype all the time. They have been been known to Skype naked, at least according to the A lister.
LAWYER 08/26 **#1**
This current A list celebrity who will go back to B list when his song stops bombarding us daily spent part of the weekend engaging in what he called a little celebration. He always wanted a foursome and he got his wish this weekend. He seemed most excited that they allowed him to take photos and didn't charge him. Robin Thicke
LAWYER 08/26 **#2**
When you are an A+ list reality star and celebrity and everything else and people love spreading gay rumors about you, the last thing you probably need to be doing is having one of the most expensive, well known gay escorts sitting in the back of your town car waiting for you when you emerged from dinner this weekend. Ryan Seacrest
LAWYER 08/26 **#3**
This A list celebrity/singer spent one of the nights this weekend glued to side of her B list celebrity husband. He kept trying to get her to go home and she refused. At one point they started screaming at each other because she wanted to know why he wanted her to go home so much. She finally stormed out of the club they were at and told him he could fuck whoever he wanted because she was out of there. He then turned to his friend and said, "You heard what she said. Go get the women." Alicia Keys/Swizz Beatz
LAWYER 08/26 **#4**
This almost A list mostly television actor who was an A+ list mostly movie actor back in the day was sweaty and drunk this weekend at a party when he kept hitting on women barely in their 20's with the line, "I'm on a television show. I used to have sex with ______________ (former A+ list mostly movie actress)." He probably would have got lucky but, even the women who could have looked past the sweaty and the drunk and that he is married, just couldn't get past the whole combination and his sense of desperation.
LAWYER 08/26 **#5**
This B- list mostly television actress who used to be on a very hit show before dropping off a cliff to the lower C range has moved herself up nicely now. For now. Some poor decisions may have cost her. She told this NFL star this weekend that she is way more freaky than his A list celebrity girlfriend and talk show host and then whispered something in his ear. It took about 30 seconds for them to leave.
LAWYER 08/26 **#6**
This B-/C+ list mostly television actress who was in a huge franchise and some busts of television shows has a hit now and was told by producers that if she wants to be back for the second season, that she needs to gain 20 pounds. They are scared of her passing out from not eating enough. She never eats. Jordana Brewster ("Dallas") ("Fast and Furious")
LAWYER 08/26 **#7**
This former almost A list mostly television actress who has been absent from this space for the past couple of months after being a frequent flyer so to speak was trying to have some public sex with her boyfriend this week. They were in a very very secluded corner, or so they thought, of a restaurant. She was sitting on his lap and they were going to have sex right there and tried several times, but kept getting interrupted by fans and then the waitress and then another fan and just gave it up.
LAWYER 08/26 **#8**
This 75% out of the closet B list celebrity/mostly movie actress got into a huge fight with her girlfriend last week. They were fighting because our actress/celebrity was cheating and got caught. Our actress/celebrity knocked her girlfriend down a huge flight of stairs and the girlfriend lost a tooth and suffered a concussion as a result. That might also explain the $50K watch our actress/celebrity said was for a gift two days after. To who though? Michelle Rodriguez
LAWYER 08/26 **#9**
"Look, why should I give a fuck whether some guy is married or has a girlfriend. If she can't keep him happy, then maybe I can. If my guy goes off with another woman it means I'm doing something wrong. I won't be mad at the other woman, I will be mad at myself." B-/C+ list mostly movie actress with almost A list name recognition, and a fairly new mother. Sienna Miller
LAWYER 08/26 **#10**
This B+ list mostly television actress who will fade away when her very hit cable show disappears was overheard saying last week that she thinks being gay is a choice. It was also one of the things she argued with her ex-husband about. Elizabeth Moss (Fred Armisen)
LAWYER 08/26 **#11**
This actor has never been a blind item before. It's shocking to me that he hasn't, but this actor, who has flirted with A list as a mostly movie actor his entire career has so far escaped being a blind item. Today though, the man who has a name that sounds like several others in Hollywood, finally get his chance to show up here. He seems quiet. Hell, he is quiet. Good looking. Really good looking. Women and guys in my office go crazy for this guy. He does have his issues though.
#1 - Cheated on his then girlfriend with his A+ list mostly movie actress co-star.
#2 - Went out with this B list mostly movie actress who has A list name recognition and is beloved north of the border for as long as it took to convince her to sleep with him. He went out with her for a week after they first had sex to make sure he had seen all her "tricks" as he says and then dumped her.
#3 - Cheated on his significant other with his barely underage co-star. She was legal where they had sex and she does act way older than her age. I always assumed she was in her 20's.
We have two interesting stories about one very moody celebrity who was in attendance at the Video Music Awards last night. First, Moody showed little emotion whenever the cameras were on her but she was dishing out some choice tidbits of nastiess when they werent! Her comments were directed specifically toward one young female Singer. While the Singer was on stage picking up an award, Moody was doing all kind of grousing. At one point she even turned around and told a young boy bander (who used to date the Singer), "Fuck that bittch! You can do better." It wasnt caught on camera, but those around them heard everything! BTW, the Boy Bander didnt react other than to purse his lips, as if restraining himself from replying. Second, at one of the after-parties, Moody got friendly with a swirly male singer. By "friendly" we mean "sticking her tongue down his throat". We cant say we blame her. After all, a certain foodie found him to be a very tasty snack last year during one of her many extra marital hotel romps. Good thing that Moodys churlish ex wasnt in attendance.
Singer Taylor Swift
Boy Bander Harry Styles
Foodie Giada DiLaurentis
Moodys Churlish Ex Chris Brown
STREET KING 08/26
This sad excuse for a music man is far from being in sync with Rhythm and Blues Just ask Raphael Saadiq yet dude is gassed up to the point where he actually believes hes worthy of wearing the King of R&B crown! Thats because this blue-eyed bandit is no stranger to his Great White Hope industry title. Know why? Because not only did he boldly straight jack the essence of one Toni, hes reported to be taking his blatant imitations to the next level. Insiders say thats why our blind items "20/20 Experience" album is rigged to land him that royal title. Sources say one former Real Husbands of Hollywood cast member who straight jacked Marvin Gaye is said to have fueled our Mickey Mouse Club mystery mans plot to launch a full blown take-over. How else do you think the songbirds wings were clipped, landing him in the Thicke of things? Just ask our blind items BFF, Jay Z. The reason? Dudes said to be fed up with walking a set of Blurred Lines. Hes a girlyman who refuses to share the spotlight, forcing that Blurred Lines-Boys bad business into public focus. Dont believe me.. Ask Pharrell Williams. Justin Timberlake/Robin Thicke (Marvin Gaye lawsuit)
LAWYER 08/27 **#1**
This B list celebrity who flirted with A list celebrity status there for awhile and hopes her new show will put her back there told a friend of hers that she was sexually assaulted two weeks ago and was threatened with death of she told anyone. Of course she told her friend who has not been shy about telling the story. Apparently there is some truth to the possible death threat. The person who allegedly did this has made people disappear before. It was supposed to be a cash transaction which it ended up being when the assaulter found out the celebrity was not a no name model, but it's been a truly awful two weeks for the celebrity. Stacey Kiebler
LAWYER 08/27 **#2**
This permanent B list because of some hardware mostly movie actor is married. Never one to let his vows stand in the way of a good time he was extra skeezy this weekend when he kept trying to pick up women and told them they needed to host him or they needed to go to the back of the club and have sex because he didn't have enough cash for a hotel room and his wife checked his credit card statements. Cuba Gooding Jr.
LAWYER 08/27 **#3**
This A+ list mostly movie actor got into a huge fight with his fairly new girlfriend and kicked her out of his hotel at around 2 a.m. Instead of calling an escort service, our actor went to a club in NYC and walked out with someone new about 30 minutes after he got there. Leonardo DiCaprio
LAWYER 08/27 **#4**
It is not everyday people, but, this B-/C+ list mostly television actress who is on a hit ABC show was approached by a guy at a party two nights ago. She asked him what he did and he said he worked for an accounting firm. The actress smiled and said, "Sorry, I don't go out with regular people," and walked away. Molly Quinn (Alexis on "Castle")
LAWYER 08/27 **#5**
This B-/C+ list mostly movie actress is being accused of getting her mid-teens, future step-daughter hooked on cigarettes. The actress doesn't think it's a big deal because she started when she was 13 and says it helps keep you skinny which is what is most important. The actress mom of the daughter doesn't agree, although she is a chain smoker too so, who knows who is at fault. Amber Heard (Johnny Depps daughter Lily-Rose Melody Depp) (mother: Vanessa Paradis)
LAWYER 08/27 **#6**
This A list mostly movie actor crashed a wedding recently. He knew the people in the wedding party, but was not invited. He came drunk. Really drunk. He fell down drunk. Our married actor also pawed at his ex who is also an actress, although has not had anywhere near the success of our A lister.
LAWYER 08/27 **#7**
This A list is everything, except for movies. He has been in them, but mostly in cameos. Anyway, he has always dabbled in drugs and has been busted and exposed in this spot at least once in a reveal and more than once in blinds. That HGH/steroids combo he is taking right now though is worse than anything he has done before. That smack he gave his B list celebrity girlfriend last week was because he blamed her for his impotence problems. He wants to look good, but is starting to lash out at everyone. Don't put a gun in his hand right now. P. Diddy/Cassie
LAWYER 08/27 **#8**
This A list actor who is usually on television now, but hops over to movies for a paycheck, told a friend a few months ago that the actor's wildest night of partying happened with his soon to be celebrity ex-stepdaughter. No actual sex, but he did shot after shot of tequila off her chest which started in a bikini and ended up topless by the end of the night. The mom would freak the eff out if she knew. Ashton Kutcher/Demis daughter Rumer Willis
LAWYER 08/27 **#9**
This mean as hell old man who is an Academy Award winner/nominee might finally be getting justice. Apparently the 20 something year old he was seeing didn't appreciate the beating he tried to give her because she didn't feel like having sex with him. She went to the police. He went to the police though too because he says she beat him. This guy has been a tool for 40 years. James Woods
LAWYER 08/27 **#10**
This former B list mostly television actress who is now a C list take whatever she can actress with B+ name recognition is an old favorite here. She is in a bad way. After a year of doing pretty well, our actress is binging and purging and spending what little money she has left on coke and meth. She is not a pretty sight up close. Paz De la Heurta
LAWYER 08/27 *#11**
This director was about A list when he was essentially blacklisted from working for a two year period. Why was he blacklisted? This is where it gets really interesting and really spiteful. It starts with this A list mostly movie actor who insists on staying closeted despite everyone knowing he is gay and never seeing him with any kind of female love interest. Plus, he is an a-hole. No one really likes him. They put up with him because he is a great actor. If he sucked as an actor, he would be the old man in the gay bar, hoping he can scrape up enough money to buy some young kid enough drinks and get him to go home with him. Anyway, this resentful closeted gay actor was having a little fling with our director. The actor was treating the openly gay director like crap, which is the actor's usual way. The director got tired of it and on his next movie had a fling with a very good looking A list mostly movie actor who enjoys the men from time to time, but never publicly talks about it any longer because he enjoys women a whole lot more. Well, word got back to our cranky closeted A list actor and when the director would not apologize for having a fling with the other A list actor, the director was blacklisted. The cranky actor couldn't do anything about the director's project at the time, but made sure he didn't work for a few years because of some very vicious rumors he spread about the director. About Thanksgiving of last year, the director, needing to work again, apologized to the actor and the actor immediately got the director a high paying gig.
Director: Robert Luketic
Cranky A list actor: Kevin Spacey
Good looking A list actor: Gerard Butler "The Ugly Truth"
LAWYER 08/28 **#1**
This former B list mostly movie actress turned friend to those who have money and occasional actress was so blitzed on a flight from a NYC to LA that the actress fell over on the guy sitting next to her and it took three people to lift her off the guy. Five minutes later, the process was repeated and went on for almost half the flight. Tara Reid
LAWYER 08/28 **#2**
This A list celebrity/singer in one language and a B lister in another was overheard telling his friend that his new girlfriend is like his own personal ATM and for once he doesn't spend a dime. He said this while holding another woman on his lap and even burned her hair once while he was chain smoking. Marc Anthony/Chloe Green
LAWYER 08/28 **#3**
This drop dead gorgeous foreign born B list mostly movie actor who should be the next James Bond said that when he was on a movie set with this barely hanging on to A list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award winner/nominee was shocked that the actress would spend her free time on set snorting heroin. He recalled that she told him to stop being such a prude. Nikolaj Caster Waldau/Cameron Diaz "The Other Woman"
LAWYER 08/28 **#4**
This B- list celebrity has told her B+ list mostly television actor with A list name recognition that she doesn't like kids and that he needs to make sure that he does not have his around if our actor wants to spend "special" time with the celebrity. Yes, she calls it special time, and yes, I threw up in my mouth a little. Katie Lee and Will Arnett
LAWYER 08/28 **#5**
This A+ list celebrity/singer would love a baby, but that would require her to have unprotected sex with her A list celebrity boyfriend. He is not the kind of guy you want to do that with, because of the gift that keeps on giving and she never did with her ex-husband either. Katy Perry/John Mayer
LAWYER 08/28 **#6**
This former A+ list tweener is now a B+ when it comes to talent and A++ when it comes to name recognition. She says that when she spent some time with this A+ list celebrity/rapper this week he would text his current significant other, but spent most of the time with his male assistant either giving him shoulder rubs or sitting on his lap or even rubbing his feet. Miley Cyrus/Kanye West (Kim Kardashian)
LAWYER 08/28 **#7**
This A+ list mostly movie actress went ballistic yesterday at a restaurant during lunch when she thought she saw a waiter looking down her unbuttoned shirt. To be fair, she did have two of the very bottom buttons fastened, but the top six or so had slowly been unbuttoned as she had a few drinks. The actress jumped up and started yelling at the guy who said all he was doing was reaching down to pick up the empty glasses. The actress then said he should do that while facing his back to the table. Huh?? Reese Witherspoon
LAWYER 08/28 **#8**
This actor is known as King Kong on the set of his hit cable drama. It is no one on Mad Men or anyone on AMC. He puts everyone on that show to shame. We are talking almost a foot long. People stare in shock at him whenever he changes. He is B-/C+ list, but if he ever wanted to get into porn he would be A lister. Might be the one of the biggest ever from an actor on television.
LAWYER 08/28 **#9**
This A list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award winner/nominee made a pap come back to her house after he took some photos that she found less than flattering. She gave him $200 and he let her get dressed and ready and looking good and those are the shots that were used.
LAWYER 08/28 **#10**
This A+ list diva and also A list singer/celebrity is drinking non-stop now and has even started back on the nose candy which she had given up a few years back. She is a mess and only manages to stay awake a few hours a day. Mariah Carey
LAWYER 08/28 **#11**
Last week I did a few crazy hookups where I gave you one half of the couple and made you guess the other half. I almost did it again with this one, but, it's pretty easy, so figured you could get it without the extra help. Oh, and this one will be revealed. So, imagine if you will a reality star. At the time she was an A list reality star. She is still almost an A list celebrity. She hooked up with this A+ list mostly movie actor who is still A+ list. Both of them had been drinking heavily and our reality star was also known for doing things other than booze, and had been having some considerable helpings of the other stuff. Our actor had no idea who she was, but at this party, she had been eyeing him and knew exactly who he was and also was desperate to stay in the public eye and thought that he would be a great catch and was perfectly willing to fuck him if needed. She made it very clear she would and the two of them left the party together. They went back to where he was staying and started fooling around and the time came to do the deed and the guy couldn't. Not even the tiniest bit at attention. Drinking? Drunk? Not interested? Our celebrity tried some other tricks but couldn't manage to get him going. The actor took some chemical help and they sat around and waited and during that time, she realized that she didn't even like the guy that much, but figured she could close her eyes and be done with it and he is and was really good looking. After almost an hour, our actor still wasn't getting close and our celebrity was growing less and less fond of the actor and when he suggested a different trick to get him in the mood, our celebrity said she had to go and left. She had been driven there by the actor, but just walked out and walked down the street and called a cab and got out of there and never spoke to the actor again. Paris Hilton/Gerard Butler
LAWYER 08/29 **#1**
This newly engaged C+ list celebrity who used to be a reality star and still has almost A list name recognition brought a portable stripper pole to where her boyfriend was staying and entertained a handful of guys, and yes, went fully nude for all of them. Perrie Edwards (engaged to "One Direction" Zayn Malik); Holly Madison (Pasquale Rotella); Brooke Hogan (Dallas Cowboy player Phil Costa)
LAWYER 08/29 **#2**
This A list television talk show host loves going to work every day because its the only time she can drink and do drugs. Her boyfriend has said he will break up with her if she does them while they are together. Too many nights of having to carry her after she passes out. Chelsea Handler/André Balazs (he broke up with her)
LAWYER 08/29 **#3**
This famous sister got her breast implants removed because her biggest customer likes her to have a more natural look. If he ever stops paying, the sister says she wants to go back to a bigger size. Ali Lohan
LAWYER 08/29 **#4**
This former almost A+ list mostly movie actor who has turned to television in his older years has also turned to his ex for a little help. His ex, is probably a C list celebrity who used to be a B list reality star who pops up in the news about once a year. Anyway, our actor is always being busted by his wife for cheating, but he and his ex came to a financial arrangement. She needed the money and he needed someone who would stay quiet about sex. The ex even arranges for other women to be brought in without our actor having to do the leg work. Kevin Costner/Angie Everhart
LAWYER 08/29 **#5**
This NFC starting quarterback is cheating on his wife with an ex that he has cheated on multiple girlfriends with and caught with before too. Jay Cutler (Kristin Cavallari)
LAWYER 08/29 **#6**
This B list mostly movie actress is about to be a C lister. She is just not working enough to justify B list any longer and doesn't cause the red carpet drama like she used to either. Anyway, she told me a few weeks ago that she used to date this former A list singer/celebrity who will never drop below a B and has A+ list name recognition even though he has not done much lately. They only went out a few times because she was not mean enough to him in bed. He likes his women very very dominant and to beat the heck out of him. When you see the actress, you would think she would be able to do it, but she said he was way too freaky even for her.
LAWYER 08/29 **#7**
This A list singer/celebrity checked into a hotel last week and twenty minutes later walked down to the front desk with the fruit basket that had been left in her room and she started tossing the fruit at the staff and asked them how long she would have to stay in the hotel before they remembered she hates fruit. Ke$ha
LAWYER 08/29 **#8**
This still A list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award winner was at dinner this week with her husband and a few of her friends. When the husband started to correct something our actress was saying, she turned to him and said, "When I want you to talk, I will tell you." The husband shut up for the rest of the dinner and just stared down at his phone. Julia Roberts
LAWYER 08/29 **#9**
This barely A list mostly movie actress apparently moves fast and has already kicked her B list mostly movie actor boyfriend to the curb after just a couple of dates. She says that she almost fell asleep when they had sex and that the boring characters he plays on screen are a true reflection of his personality.
LAWYER 08/29 **#10**
I guess this is getting revenge. This A list rapper has been stealing away women from this other A+ list married rapper and recording sex with them and then e-mailing the videos to the A+ list rapper. Jay-Z/50 Cent
LAWYER 08/29 **#11**
This celebrity has been around for a long time. She has always tried to act like she is a goody goody and despite her divaness the goody goody part of her has never really been questioned. It turns out though that she can be a very very bad person and a celebrity she was previously involved with has filmed a documentary which highlights everything the diva did with him. Did I tell you the diva is A+? She is. This would rock her little kingdom to the bones. The documentary has footage of our diva snorting lines of coke off the celebrity and just about everywhere else. It has multiple sex scenes with the celebrity and the diva is a big freak in bed, which is not how she likes to be thought of at all. There are phone recordings of her begging for more drugs and other recordings where she talks about how wasted she is and the sex acts she wants to perform on the celebrity. The diva is aware of the documentary, but knows she can't actually stop it from being released if the celebrity chooses. This will be revealed. Mariah Carey and Eminem
This Lady is drowning her sorrows by staying high. Raunchy behavior by her man with other women in public have her trying to ...feel no pain. Paula Patton (Robin Thicke)
LAWYER 08/30 **#1**
This east coast Real Housewife acts as a type of madam. She introduces women to rich men and then takes a cut of the fee that the men pay. Huh. OK, so a madam and not type of madam. This B list celebrity father of a former B list mostly movie actress is one of the biggest clients. NOT Atlanta. Sonja Morgan "RHNY"/Michael Lohan
LAWYER 08/30 **#2**
This C+ list mostly movie director has a B list mostly movie actress girlfriend with almost A list name recognition. They started dating because the first woman he had sex with on the film he was directing didn't do it for him, so two hours later he had sex with his current girlfriend and they have been together ever since. She doesn't know about the first woman two hours earlier. Michael Polish/Kate Bosworth/Stana Katic, Nora Kirkpatrick or Radha Mitchell "Big Sur"
LAWYER 08/30 **#3**
What A+ list supermodel had sex with one producer and threatened another with harm if they did not fire an A list supermodel. It seems our A+ list supermodel got her way. She usually does. Naomi Campbell/Karolina Kurkova "The Face"
LAWYER 08/30 **#4**
This Academy Award winner/nominee actor who is probably a B- list mostly movie actor right now was hanging out with this former A+ list celebrity and reality star who is now a B- list celebrity who people still love to hate. Apparently he convinced her to take some drug he had just bought in a club and she did and had a seizure in the foreign club on the floor. Adrien Brody/Paris Hilton (in Ibiza)
LAWYER 08/30 **#5**
This former B list mostly movie actress is now a C list who will work anywhere anytime, but the check better be large. She was supposed to be promoting a movie this week, but when the producers would not cough up an extra $50K in fees and plane tickets, our actress stiffed them. Lindsay Lohan "Canyons"
LAWYER 08/30 **#6**
This current A list celebrity/singer was told by his B list mostly movie actress wife that she was in the mood for a threesome the other night and that our singer should find someone. He did and everything was fine and then the wife got cold feet so the wife and singer dumped the third and left. The third was apparently ticked off and she got her revenge in a very public way. Robin Thicke/Paula Patton
LAWYER 08/30 **#7**
This former B list mostly television actor who had A list name recognition and every teen wanted to marry has had trouble finding work the past few years and is now down to a C+. Part of the problem is his attitude since he only wants to be the star of something and the other part is that he's hooked on pills that his wife gets for him in her name. David Cassidy
LAWYER 08/30 **#8**
This always gorgeous, but not the greatest acting talent B- list mostly movie actress tried to kill herself last week. It isn't the first time, but in the past she had a support team and also went to rehab. This time she is trying to go it alone or kind of alone with her on/off actor boyfriend. Eva Mendes/Ryan Gosling
LAWYER 08/30 **#9**
This B list actor who divides his time between television and movies has A+ name recognition and everyone knows his face. He likes to have a good time and can usually get lucky, despite his unorthodox looks. His best friend has troubles so the actor is forever paying for escorts for his friend so he won't feel left out. David Spade
LAWYER 08/30 **#10**
How would you like to be this former B list mostly television married actress from one of the biggest cable shows of all time and have a fling with a woman and then have a B list mostly movie actress stalker because she thinks you stole her woman. That's what happened to the actress. One night and then six months of being stalked and harassed.
LAWYER 08/30 **#11**
This movie sucked, but still made enough money to generate a sequel. If you watched both of the movies, I'm sorry about that four hours of your life that you won't get back. What they should have filmed instead was what went on behind the scenes. There was a whole lot of sex and a whole lot of cheating. The guys involved will tell you they were technically single because one (#1) was on a break from his wife and the other (#2) said that since he was not yet married, he could do what he wanted with whoever he wanted. #3 couldn't decide which guy she wanted to be with so she ended up having sex with both and would alternate, depending on the day or even the hour. Yeah, well, she is not exactly well known for being virtuous. #4 also had sex with both of the guys, and also another guy on the film, who was well and truly single. It seems that #3 hates #4 with a passion and that #4 knew that #3 really wanted #1 and even thought she could snag him and marry him. Apparently #4 found #1 to be a little dirty and didn't shower much and always smelled of smoke and desperation. #1 would fondle anyone and anything that even gave him a glimmer of hope. No one could ever figure out why he even bothered to be married since he showed no interest in anything but having as much sex as possible. #2 was much more discreet, but rarely spent a day without female companionship, he just wasn't sweaty and disgusting about it and you didn't feel like you were sleeping with a dirty old man. Yes, this will be revealed.
"G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra"
#1 - Former A list mostly movie actor who is now a B- mostly television actor: Dennis Quaid
#2 - A list mostly movie actor who has the acting talent of a D lister: Channing Tatum
#3 - Former B+ list mostly movie actress who has dropped off the movie making in the past two years and is now a C+: Sienna Miller
#4 - Former B- list mostly movie actress who has returned to her roots as a B- list mostly television actress on a middling hit cable show: Rachel Nichols "Continuum"
Other guy on the film: (POSSIBLY: Joseph Gordon-Levitt)
STREET KING 08/30
This 25-year-old singer is far from talkin square biz but even if she was talkin live biz, she no longer has anyone to kick it to. Thats because our blind item was told to kick rocks by one freaky pair who grew tired of her after serving as the Atlanta couples live-in sex toy. Dont believe me.. Just ask Rico Love. Now, shes said to be homeless! Sources say they re not the only ones to tell her to step adding a lesbian publicist to the list of people she fucked over. Were told thats because she drained Hazels bank account. After being stripped of her ATL and LA privileges, she packed up and headed to the Big Apple joining Jessica White. Now, the newly fused pair are being dubbed the Black Thelma and Louise. Shes the reason why Ray J vowed to no longer date women of the industry. Now, can you guess who Im talking about? Tea Marie
LAWYER 08/31 **#1**
This A list mostly movie actor has been right at the edge of A list for the past few years. Some good movies and some bad movies. As he goes up and down in weight he also goes through women just as much. This past week he was at a restaurant with her and they were seated outside. She went to the bathroom and when she came back he looked up at her and said, "Don't ever be gone that long again you fucking bitch. When people walk down the sidewalk they need to see me with someone and not sitting here by myself like some asshole who couldn't get a date." The girlfriend didn't even bother to sit down and just walked away. Jonah Hill
LAWYER 08/31 **#2**
This A list mostly television actor with A list name recognition had a secret child with a hooker. She was messed up on drugs. He arranged for the child to be adopted by his ex. Charlie Sheen/Denise Richards
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Last updated: August 14, 2015
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