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--This lead singer of a popular group which has a Gilligan's Island connection has never set very high standards when it comes to the women he dates. The easier the better. This has given him the protection he needs as he totally gives up the ladies and concentrates on men. In the past several weeks he has been spotted in several nightclubs in LA picking up guys for the night. He has to take them to hotels or back to their place, because his current boyfriend would be none to happy to know he has been getting a little something on the side. Adam Levine of "Maroon 5" (John Mayer is rumored to be his boyfriend)

--This comedian who has been in the news lately has taken out his anger on the staff and crew of his television show. Producers have been ordered to fire anyone who is not working every second of the day. There is no standing around or you are out the door. Of course this rule does not apply to the comedian himself who takes long naps to make it through the 16 hour workdays. The producers understand that resentment is building. With no crew or staff, there would be no show and so only take action when the comedian is around. They also realize that the comedian only notices himself and so the producers yell at the offending party and then shuffle them off where they will not be seen the rest of the day. Carlos Mencia

You know what fashion trend is really hot this spring? Thinking caps. So why don't you go ahead and put on your best one, because that's right — it's blind item time again! Today's entry concerns one of television's sexiest leading men. His appeal, you would presume, is beyond dispute. But behind the scenes of his show, a great debate is raging over his hair — specifically how much gray he should be showing. Off camera, the guy isn't salt-'n'-pepper gray, he's practically full-on Santa Claus gray. So execs are petrified that if they take a step in the wrong direction and upset the delicate balance of his screen locks, his popularity will plummet. Personally, I think so long as it remains thick enough for viewers to want to run their fingers through it, he's golden. But that's just me. Guesses? Anyone? Everyone?
Eric Dane

Preen Pumper has a fairly superclean rep, despite being pretty much of a dawg before he hooked up with his longtime love, Dare E. Airre. But then, longtime amour never lasts in this heathen-filled 'ville, right? Right. Therefore, P2 has been making his way through various buxom hookups, post-Dare split. And P.P.'s current lady love seems to be—perhaps—in for the long haul. We'll see, won't we? I'm just, uh, wondering if we should send out some kind of warning to P.P.'s current babe-friend, a nice enough gal who seems to be a bit o' a farm-fed femme, seemingly pure and all that (unbelievable) nonsense. See, Preen has his sexual peccadilloes, don't we all? And Preen's, it turns out, is alternate-entry sex, which, when I've polled most of my (male and female) straight buds, I have found out is not so unusual on the het scene: I mean, if you're a guy, you just basically want to put it anywhere you can, n'est-ce pas? Well, we'll touch on that pokin' theory another time. Right now, we gotta get back to Preen, who always prefers his outback ways to involve a guy, turns out. What a surprise! Closeted homosexual behavior in Tinseltown! I'm shocked! It's just that Preen's demands in this arena are downright creepy, as Mr. Pumper always insists that his guy partners never:
—Kiss him.
—Look at him.
—Have an orgasm anywhere in P.P.'s vicinity.
Additionally (I'm surprised Preen doesn't have his partners sign confidentiality contracts, but, ah, isn't Tinseltown just made for stupid-ola freakazoids?), Pumper insists on remaining squeaky-clean himself, but he is willing to go a second round, should all these cumbersome rules not get in the way of any spontaneity. Gosh, how could they possibly not? Sounds like having sex with Martha Stewart on steroids or something! (This is a joke, E! Legal Eagles, please be advised.) Oh, and by the by, should tell you all that Ms. Airre had no idea her man was going out the door for the behind-door stuff. Until now, that is. And it ain't: McCauley Culkin, Brody Jenner, Tyrese
Heath Ledger; Usher

--Seriously I wish people would either be gay or straight because even I am getting confused. I mean I want Portia de Rossi to be straight but she is not and I can live with that. It can be just hard sometimes to get the image of Ellen out of my mind, but with effort anything is possible. Another singer. Not the one from yesterday is now switching between guys and girls. I guess the guys are even interested now that they have seen the photos and he is more than willing.
Cisco Adler

--A marriage that everyone thought was headed to divorce years ago because of bad boy behavior is actually heading to divorce now because of drug use and violence. His wife has always denied it in the past and been a big supporter of this bad boy. BUT that is all about to change and will become public knowledge very soon. Robin Wright Penn and Sean Penn

--This female A list celebrity and B list actress has always alternated between men and women. Now it seems as if she has gotten herself in the family way and is not quite sure who the father is and so for now is quietly asking all of her recent boyfriends what they would want to do about the situation if they were the father. Lindsay Lohan *see EL 03/05

--This aging C list actor cannot get a date, but he does have money and so he always pays a woman to be his date/relationship for the month prior to and immediately after any movie he is in. Mickey Rourke

--I know the last one is practically impossible so here is a bonus. This aging former cable star was heard lamenting the other night how her very rich husband has cheated on her from almost day one of their marriage. He married her when she was still something. Now she is a oh, yeah I remember her. She just accepts the cheating because they have an iron clad pre-nup and she has no job prospects and no money.

5. HOLY MOLY 03/02
Penny For The Gak : Post-Oscars, which duck-faced actress was spotted having an heroic struggle with a huge line of cocaine artfully displayed on a table at the Roosevelt Hotel? Luckily her nose was equal to the task and devoured the lot, resulting in much applause from her entourage. Penelope Cruz; Cameron Diaz

Which single-again actor won't be romancing the co-star from his current romantic comedy? "He found her perky, sunny attitude completely annoying," says a snitch. "He can't stand her.
" Hugh Grant/Drew Barrymore

This good looking leading man from an acting family - who often plays '"the boyfriend" in movies - has a secret drug problem. He's always seemed clean cut and the last one you'd suspect. Around six months ago he tried heroin and he LOVED it. Now he's a slave to the substance and his family is worried sick. This actor used to be very visible and social - dating some of Hollywood's prettiest women. Now all he cares about is getting high. His brother is terrified and the family is scheming to get him into rehab before it's too late.
Luke Wilson

Which sexpot actress, infamous for her on-set hookups, is sticking mighty close to the married co-star of her current release? He arrived unexpectedly at the film premiere's after-party and was close with her all night.

1. An update to the blind item from Thursday about the comedian who is making everyone miserable with his work edicts. It seems as if the comedian has gone too far. Tired of putting up with his crap, there was a walkout en masse of various workers which caused the production to grind to a halt until they could find some new replacement victims, I mean workers.
Carlos Mencia

2. She was doing so well also. This starlet who is allegedly sober was seen popping pills while drinking out of her "water" bottle this past weekend. Was it because of the recent photos of her which showed off her "baby bump?" Lindsay Lohan

3 One of the great things about Las Vegas is the plentiful food. This actress who had been gaining weight and looking hot enough to date after a long bout of not eating is back at it again. Our spy caught her in the restroom at a restaurant the other night either suffering from the flu or an instant case of food poisoning because the actress spent about ten minutes getting rid of the food she had just eaten. Emmy Rossum

Which golden, unmarried couple is known for coke-fueled fights behind the scenes? The bicoastal beauties do a snoutful in the limo before events so they arrive beaming.

--At a recent wedding, this former flame did not show up because the new husband did not want him to be there. Seems as if he has caught his new bride and her former flame still sparking from time to time. He was willing to put up with it when they were single, but not now as a married couple.
Liz Hurley/Hugh Grant/Arun Nayer

Remember this blind item from a few weeks ago
--A little update. Two actually. He recently told her that he wanted to invite another woman over and join them. She said no and told her friend (never do that) what he had said. Well she found out she missed him so she went back and agreed to do as he wanted. As for imagining__________, she has drawn the line in fulfilling that fantasy for him. She does allow the other person in the background so to speak.

a: Ashlee Simpson; Haley Duff
b. Jessica Simpson; Hilary Duff
c. Pete Wentz; A.J. DiScala

Remember this blind item from a few weeks ago
--He has been in the news a lot lately. His girlfriend was shocked and embarrassed they were caught and told her friend (again, never do that), but he still got her to do it again at dinner last week.
Quentin Tarantino; Bill Maher

Which glittering bicoastal couple had to pretend to break up for two months because the glamazon actress broke his nose during a cocaine-fueled fight? "He needed reconstructive surgery and dropped out of sight," says a snitch. "The cover story was they broke up while she did her movie thing. Then when he was ready to be seen in public again, they got back together."
Uma Thurman and Andre Balazs; Charlize Theron and Stuart Townsend

--Do you remember the blind item:
About the pap who was staking outa house looking for one special photo? Well there have been some developments. First, the boyfriend and girlfriend have married. I ran into the pap's assistant the other day and he said that about 5 or 6weeks ago, the now wife left for a few days and the pap got the shot he wanted. It took him months of waiting but he got the money shot. He tried to sell it to a US magazine and they did not want to touch it. He then went to a UK magazine and they offered him a tremendous amount of money, but not the kind of money that makes up for months of waiting. So, using the UK offer as leverage he decided to offer the photo for sale to the husband. They have discussed a price but nothing finalized yet. If the sale does not go final, then UK it is.
Tom Cruise with another man while Katie Holmes was in Paris, also the reason for new digs

--Do you remember this blind item from a few months ago?
One of my favorite actresses is finding that the road to seriousness is tough when you are not serious yourself. This actress who has been in A-List movies and has had an A list career without the payoff has begun to try her hand at producing. The only problem is that during her latest film she spent more time in the bathroom doing lines of coke then remembering the lines in her part. In the last few months she had assured everyone that she was clean and sober and an angel all over again. Two years ago her career almost came crashing to a halt because no one would hire her. She cleaned up and has been working and had more in the works. But just like her last few relationships, the projects are disappearing fast. She has always been gorgeous and talented, but because of the drugs and booze always one step away from becoming an acting footnote. ***Update*** She has basically sold herself out to the highest bidder now. Found a rich guy and let him be the financial backer for her producing and all of her living expenses and in return she will be his actress girlfriend that can still make the pap follow her sometimes.
Brittany Murphy (the film she was producing, actually turned out to be one of my favorites. "Ramen Girl")

--In a similar vein these two actresses are competing to be the new trophy girlfriend of this aging tycoon. He is always seen in the company of beautiful women because it is a part of his job. Always willing to provide favors for those women who are nice to him, he provides special favors to the actress who pleases him most. He had a long-term "situation" recently end. He has two women competing for the role of trophy. One is an 80's teen actress who shared the screen with some pretty women. The other is an exotic actress we have come to love; at least in the gossip world.
aging tycoon: Francois-Henri Pinault
80s teen actress:
exotic actress: Salma Hayek

Hated Harry - A certain heartthrob on a show I love—I would call him Handsome Harry—has always been a perfect gentleman to me. He's gorgeous, charming, witty—all the makings of a future husband!—and comes across the exact same way on his popular show. But I've just learned (and it chills me to the bone!) that those who work with Harry have an entirely different opinion of their costar. He is hated. By everyone—especially the people whose characters hate him on the show. And it's funny, 'cause I guarantee you would think someone else on this particular series was the diva on set. But trust me: Harry takes the cake.
Patrick Dempsey

15. TV Guide/Ausiello Report 03/07
I'm a trained professional, so ordinarily, writing blind items doesn't bother me. I mean, come on — if you've hinted at one pair of combative co-stars, you've hinted at hundreds. But this week's mystery entry, I have to admit, does give me the blues. You see, it's about me and a former BFF — someone I adore on par with the likes of Keri and Marish. The celeb in question was rubbed the wrong way by something I wrote in this very column — something, I can't emphasize enough, that I thought she'd be glad I wrote. In no uncertain terms, she made her displeasure known, and I apologized every way I knew how. Despite this, I've never, ever heard from her again. So, as much as it pains me, can you figure out who I'm talking about? And if you can, can you please tell her to call me? The "I'm sorry" flowers I bought her have wilted by now, but there are still a few cream-centered candies in the box of "mea culpa" chocolates.
Emily VanCamp

Which living-legend actor, during a break from his long-term relationship a few years ago, paid a high-end yenta (who charges some clients up to $50,000) to set him up? The young lady was duly found, but, despite several dates, he was always too drunk by the end of the evening to consummate their relationship. "He would just lie on the bed and say, 'Squeeze hard!'" laughs the snitch.

--Last weekend at the poker tournament this B list actress who has been in two hit shows back to back was all kindness. An elderly man was getting up from his table and was struggling to get all of his chips together and his belongings while also keeping his balance. While this was going on, a group of four 20 something guys were playing grab ass with each other and just being asses in general ran into the elderly man. Our actress rushed to give aid to the elderly man whose chips and belongings had scattered beneath tables and chairs while at the same time unleashing a string of obscenities at the gang of four. When she unleashed her verbal tirade, it also caused the other players at the man's table to stop ignoring the situation and start helping. The gang of four looked sheepish and embarrassed but still did not help. The other players and our actress gathered the chips and belongings of the elderly man and our actress helped him to his feet and the other side of the casino where he was meeting his ride home. She stayed with him until she was sure he was fine and had cashed in his winnings.

Maura Tierney (NewsRadio, ER)

--No Jackass to go with this, but a hint to one. Do you remember this jackass?
***Update***No matter how much you spin it and think everyone is believing your happy tale, you are still an ass. Not just in this situation but in so many others as well. You have great publicists who make everything seem to go away, but eventually your temper will get the best of you.
Jeremy Piven

Do you remember this blind item from two months ago?
--This British actress and her current boyfriend are always photographed in public groping and making out. She tries hard to show that she is all woman and that she loves boys. The problem is that even when they are out and about, no one really believes it. He is hot for her, but she always looks as if it is the last thing on her mind no matter how much they mug for the cameras. In private he doesn’t even get a whiff of her perfume. When they started dating he thought it would be true love. Actually though it has been a nightmare because she will not let him break it off. She has an image to live up to. What it means for him though is that everyone thinks he is dating her so she turns the girls from him away, although she is watching them when they walk away. ***So now that he finally managed to escape her death grip, she is on the hunt for a new show boy (better than beard) but everyone knows the score in the UK so she is coming to LA and hoping to find someone who hates kissing her as much as she hates kissing him.***
Keira Knightley

This blind item also needs to be updated.
--This fading so fast cable reality star just does not want to let go. Not content to sit on the beach or watch OC reruns on Fox, he instead likes to go to places where he knows teenagers flock and where he will still be recognized and adored. His latest trick is to go to fast food restaurants in the mall and channeling Eric Roberts in Star 80 convinces the barely legal females that he can make them a star. Invariably, he invites them back to his place, has his way with them and has them pose for photos he promises to submit to Playboy. The girls never hear from him again, but have heard from his friends who also want a personal show after viewing the photos. ***So, one reality star headed to jail. Will our fading star be keeping him company? One of his recent conquests was 17 and not the 18 she originally claimed. Our fading star is really sweating this and has totally given up his game because his parents had to bail him out with some financial assistance to keep everything quiet.***
Talan Torriero "Laguna Beach"

18. Perez "Not So Blind" 03/08
Part 1: What recently out-of-rehab starlet has been spotted drinking the alcohol on multiple occasions by spies? She tries to do it covertly, hiding her drinks in the DJbooth or sipping from her friends' drinks, but our peeps have caughther repeatedly chugging the forbidden juice!

Part 2: What recovering startlet has not been spotted at any AloholicsAnonymous meetings since she left rehab, according to several snitcheswho attend AA (oops) that talked to Lindsay Lohan

Sorry, gals, another (hetero) celeb bites the dust. ‘Cause, according to one guy who’s done the biting on Tumescent Pickle’s privates, T.P. only allows da dudes down there for servicing. Oh, but there’s a catch—as is always the case in this never-as-it-seems enclave. Mr. Pickle, who has as healthy a media presence as he does body endowment, prefers to pretend his male sex providers look like girls. ¿Comprende? No? Well, just conjure up Sacha Baron Cohen’s BFF Dustin Hoffman during his Academy Award-winning Tootsie days, and you just might see the panties-wearing light. "He’s totally into trannies,” gabbed one of same who said he’s done it with T.P. Oh, by the by, for all you sexually less enlightened folk out there who think "tranny” is short for prostitutes from Transylvania, or something, must tell you it’s slang for transsexual or transvestite. Ya know, like Felicity Huffman in TransAmerica? Good. Glad you all get it now. Let’s move on: Sadly, just like last week’s Preen Pumper, I’m afraid this Mr. Pee also doesn’t like a lotta kissin’ or cuddlin’ along with the mostly one-way sex, just "wham-bam, thank you, man"! ‘Course, a lotta guys are like that with their gals in general—right, ladies? Uh-huh. I just wonder how long it’s going to be before Pickle’s conservative entertainment-conglomerate boss peeps find out the well-liked aw-shucks stud likes anything but born booby types in bed. Oh, who the hell am I kidding here? Half of Hollywood stars (and their employers) are into the kinkiest stuff around.  And it aint:  George Clooney, Chris Rock, Bill Maher Owen Wilson

20. 3 A.M. GIRLS 03/09
WHICH ageing crooner's third facelift looks so severe he now insists on £200,000 of ultra-soft lighting being installed in every concert venue he plays in?
Tom Jones

--Which B list actor was not warmly received when he inserted himself into another actor's big night and stole much of the publicity from the actor and the project?
Jeremy Piven

--What moron thought Kim Kardashian would make a great host for a workout video? Was it the same moron who said she should host the show at her store? Whoops. That's not really blind is it? Video

--Do you remember this blind item from two months ago? She is having to go through this cycle again because people always ask who she is dating. She is even using a very popular tactic which everyone recognizes for what it is. Kate Walsh "Grey's Anatomy" REFERENCE 23

--This A List actor at least in his mind and the way he acts is a little nervous these days. Turns out that his body which he displays with pride may have been the product of a little chemical help. Seems he used the same pharmacy as many of the athletes now getting into trouble and is afraid his name will also showup on the list and be made public. 50 Cent

--You remember this blind item from last week's FFF?
If he makes it another week without being arrested for drug use or ending up in rehab, everyone who knows him will be shocked.

22. 3 A.M. GIRLS 03/10
WHICH pop star dumped a girlfriend and demanded back a Rolex watch because he thought she sold a story on him despite her insisting she didn't?

Which left coast male celebutard who's always in the glossies told his parents he's an "art dealer," when in fact he's a different kind of dealer?
Brandon "Firecrotch" Davis

24. Perez "Not So Blind" 03/11
Which sweaty male celebutard recently had to borrow over a million dollars from friends all over Los Angeles because he was afraid for his life? He has a lot of gambling debts to various people and entities and he was scared they were gonna "collect" real soon.
Brandon "Firecrotch" Davis

25. NY POST 03/12
WHICH TV news anchorwoman is about to get separated from her husband? He not only suspects she's been having an affair, he's been investigating and he's just about finished.
Paula Zahn

Could it be that a certain small screen boytoy has been fulfilling some of his sexual fantasies? I'm told that, in spite of his famous moniker, he enjoys having two sex partners at a time - most usually a male and a female (although occasionally two members of the same sex.) Often these trysts are arranged for him by his famous singing sidekick. When asked which sex he prefers, our lad dances around the subject - one of his many hidden talents. Given his extreme youth (he's barely legal), there's no need to make any rash decisions.
Lil JJ/"Just Jordan"

1. This C list blond bombshell actress has moved from bit parts on television to nice sized roles in the movies. She has been working her way steadily up the ladder. Her latest film was supposed to be her breakout role. In fact she was even being talked about to play ANS in a future film. Well if she is going to portray ANS she has one thing in common with her. Turns out everyone thought she was a goody-goody until this latest film role. She was getting tired during the long filming days and so a member of the crew gave her a little pill to make her wide awake. She loved it and went back everyday. One day the crew member gave her a little coke and now she can't get enough. Two other actresses on the film sat our actress down and told her that she had a great career ahead of her and to stop doing what she was doing. They threatened to tell the producers if they caught her again. She stopped. BUT, since filming ended she has gone back to her old ways and is moving in with the crew member to make sure her source stays close.
Kate Bosworth

2. Do you remember this blind item from last month?: Prior to the Academy Awards this weekend, stars and non-stars alike will be begged to visit or have to worm their way in to various swag bag suites to get free stuff. If you want free stuff for yourself or even a guest, then no problem. The problem is when you are a middling star at best, and decide you want to invite five of your friends to each suite. This C list actress on a big hit show decided to throw a fit in one suite when she was told that her friends would not be able to grab any of the high priced goodies for themselves. She yelled and cursed and threw a fit that would make Naomi Campbell or Foxy Brown proud, but the staff would not budge. So, our actress decided to leave. Before leaving though, she managed to break and or damage several items and was stuffing everything else she could grab into her HUGE purse and then walked out without looking back. (Not Hayden P.) ***Well she was up to her old tricks again this weekend. Trying to show off to her no-name friends, our actress tried to get into Winston's. Nope. She started with don't you know who I am routine and still she could not get in. So, they moved over to Hyde. (NOTE to celebrities. Drive yourself and do not hire a driver. Then no one would know) Even this club wouldn't let her in now and they let anyone in now. (Even me, which is REALLY pathetic.) The people at the door said no to her, but did agree to let her two friends in. Her friends were overjoyed and left the actress at the door. When the people at the door finally relented, our actress told anyone who would listen that it was just to make her friends look good. (Different network than Hayden P) Stacey Keibler (who at the time was actually acting on a television show. Yeah, that scares me too.)

--Blind Item Queen: When I was going back through the blind items, I realized this actress is the subject of three blind items. I think this is her most recent. There are two others. One which deals with what she likes in her men and the other about some of her other adult activities. I can't find them right now though. (Not Jessica B.) What cutie-pie actress at a pre-awards party let it be known that she was single and looking for a new guy. How did she let everyone know? By making out with two different prospects during the night. ***I love the beach*** Kirsten Dunst

One Girlie-Gunning Blind Vice: Bet you’d be surprised to hear that Botox-Bang Slasher isn’t the well-behaved home hon she appears to be. B2 was in a hit campy TV show, as well as a string of flicks on the big screen, along with some not so hot movies lately. Now, B-Bang got hitched to her honey a while back, and she appeared to settle down, keeping a fairly low profile. You don’t hear about this couple fighting; they’re not seen out at Hyde every other night...You get the idea. But evidently, B.B. did get a little sassy a while back in New Yawk. Botox was spotted full-on making out with another femme in plain public view at a bar. Makes me wonder if she’s really into the girls or just had a few too many and was being silly?  Also can’t help but wonder if her hubby knows about her girl-on-girl lip-locks. Does he know? Does he even care? I’ve heard he might be in to guys himself, so maybe their whole happy Hollywood marriage is a farce? Like myriad middle-America ones ain’t, either. And It Ain't: Felicity Huffman; Jada Pinkett Smith; Melanie Griffith
Sarah Michelle Gellar

Mini-Jackass: Last night at the Ralphs Supermarket on Sunset.This award winning B list television actor, formerly a B list movie actor with one big starring A list role had a huge cart filled with groceries. The store was packed. A woman with two items comes up to him and asks if she can go in front of him. The actor replied, "Why the f*** would I let you go in front of me? Are you dying? Is there someone waiting for you who is going to die? The purpose of a line is to put everyone and everything in order. I was here first and you were here second." She replied that he seemed so nice on television. "Well this is Ralphs, not television and you need to learn to tell the difference," he said. At that point she left the line and went to another on the opposite end of the store.
Alec Baldwin

Meeting at the Spa: There have always been rumblings about his sexual orientation…never anything concrete. Just that, as we all know, any time you’re single for a protracted time in Hollywood and you happen to be as fine and distinguished as he is, people start to whisper. And while I do know for sure that he does enjoy women, even hiring them on occasion, this is the first legitimate hint of the gaygay – for me anyway – that I can report. Or maybe not. Maybe it means nothing. After all, there can be a THOUSAND explanations behind it, right? So he’s shooting on location. Co-star flirtation will undoubtedly start swirling…as usual… especially since they’ve supposedly had a past. Anyway, during down time, he heads to the local spa for a massage. Very normal. Except he books a Couples Massage. Also very normal. But is it normal that his partner was his stylist? His male stylist? Well… since I think he’s totally, totally straight – to me, he’s just a dude with a tight sched. Sometimes you have to take a meeting in the unlikeliest of places. Others in our conservative location town however found it a little unusual though I should clarify – there were no Travolta-like masseur-inspired c*ckstands, thank Goddess. Oh and one more thing – this male stylist goes everywhere habit? It’s apparently, like, totally a habit. Every location, everywhere, a shadow. I hear this wasn’t the first couples massage. And it won’t be the last. But again – call me Cruise, as is the case with Jake Gyllenhaal, to me this superstar is 100% into chicks.
George Clooney, currently filming "Leatherheads" with Renée Zellweger; stylist: Waldo Sanchez

Second Fiddle: Second Fiddle was the big, huge, headlining star of his show—for about, oh, five minutes until someone else was cast on the same show and completely stole his thunder. Much like Marcia to Jan, it has been all about “First Fiddle, First Fiddle, First Fiddle.” (Insert eye roll.) But soon the tides will be turning. Firstie won’t be shown quite as much in future episodes, and I’m told that soon, the storyline will be treating Second much like the First. So...Is there room for both fiddles? You bet. But they have to play nice.
"Prison Break"
First Fiddle: Wentwoth Miller
Second Fiddle: Dominic Purcell

So last night went out with one of my new found Grammy friends. Let’s call her AP. I really didn’t want to go, but ended up having a good time. I don’t know if it was because of the booze or just because it was nice to go out for the first time in a few weeks. She is followed by the pap when she puts herself in a position to be photographed, but it just goes to show you that when you want to be away from the cameras it is pretty easy unless you are worthy of people following you all the time. I was going to tell her about the blog but chickened out. We basically talked about what it is like for an actress to change not only the public perception of her but also the studios. Even though she is a solid B lister she is forced to audition for the roles she wants. If she wants to portray what she is known for than it is unnecessary, but otherwise she reads scripts sent to her and has to go audition just like everyone else. The only break she gets is that she gets to see most of the scripts being sent out and can always get an audition. Her solution to the problem has been to try and do films on her own which she loves but does not really pay the bills. In fact it even can cost her money in the long run. If her movie does not do well, she does not get her money back. In addition, to do the movie that she may not get any money for precludes her from picking up other work for which she could have been paid. As my drinking level increased I started pumping her for gossip. Ali Larter

(blind item, within blind item) One thing she said was something that makes sense but that I had not really thought of before. It was basically two things. One I had heard before. This celebutante dated a singer after his break-up but it was all for show and publicity for her. He didn’t mind because he just wanted something easy and uncomplicated and they both got what they wanted. In addition, this same person had been allegedly hit on by someone associated with her family. AP didn’t know if the girl went through with it or not though. The only reason she had heard about it is because some former friends of AP always joke about it. Kim Kardashian/Nick Lachey.

We talked about drugs for awhile and she had some interesting things to say. She said they are always around and available whenever any star wants them. For women they are usually free and guys are always willing to buy coke or whatever for a girl just like anyone else would buy a drink for a woman in a bar. They always want something in return. AP knows if someone is headed to rehab or should be headed to rehab if the star is actually having to buy their own drugs. It means they are using way more than they should be because as long as it is recreational, someone will always be willing to pay for the star. When it gets to be abuse, the star is on the hook for the cost and that is where the trouble starts. I honestly don’t remember much beyond that, except that I asked her if she ever made a sex tape and she said yes. She said though that after filming, she looked at the guy and realized she was not going to marry him and not going to be with him long-term and knew that would be trouble. So, she grabbed the tape and jumped up and down on it, pulled the tape out, and then cut it up into a million pieces. Plenty of people have asked since, but she has always said no. Three people came up and asked for her autograph and also wanted a photo. Of course I got to be the photo guy. Unfamiliar digital cameras and drinking do not always go well together, especially when the subjects of the photo REALLY want their shot of AP and them to be perfect. Well then you shouldn't have asked the drunk guy to take the photo. One of the people wanted AP to record a voice mail message, but AP didn't want to. I did though and made some wise ass remark about Mel Gibson. I think I offended the woman though because she looked at me like I had lost my mind. I was too drunk to drive and so she drove me home and then I must have told her to keep the car and I would pick it up today. I know this, because at about 4 am my phone rang. One of my favorite clients got arrested for burglary and when I went downstairs to get my car it was not there. Cabs are always fun at 4 am, especially when you are caught in the middle of still being a little drunk and the hangover is just starting to take over your body. I had to arrange his bail which is not unusual. He just is not very good at what he does, and so is arrested about once a year. He is such a nice guy and could do so many things with his life, but as he has told me many times, this is his career. He never gets any serious jail time because he rarely makes it inside the building which he is trying to burglarize.

--So, back to last night and the dinner and drinking and gossiping. Did I mention the drinking? During dinner, AP got a text message talking about a party that was going on at the same time we were eating. She read it aloud and wrote back. Several more text messages revealed this. This party caused a headache today for one person already and does not need to be rehashed. It may cause a few more. It seems that no big celebrities really wanted to attend this appearance, and so the companies involved ordered up some really no name female "talent". This talent consists of women who shuffle between the front of the camera and the crew as well as women who usually model or just appear in a very brief scene showing nothing at all. They came out in droves and swarmed over the few B list male attendees. This married B list television and film actor was seen with two girls in one of the bathrooms trading kisses and gropes while finding time to do some lines of coke. Another fading and aging married C list film and television actor found two "actresses" of his own and spent time with them on a couch in the corner and then left with one on each arm. Meanwhile, a C list television and film actress known more for her body was in another area showing off her new breasts to a group of enraptured men and two women (not together). She gave each of them a lap dance while the others cheered and whistled. Tips were offered and accepted.
Party: GQ/Heineken Light party

Married B list television and film actor: Taye Diggs
Fading and aging married C list film and television actor: Christopher McDonald
Two "actresses": Stormy Daniels and Mary Christina Brown
C list television and film actress known more for her body: Bai Ling

--In case you are ever wondering how a blind item comes to be, yesterday's is a good example of what is involved. Rarely is it someone coming up to you and saying I just saw so and so doing strange things to a horse. They are usually more circumspect than that. At dinner on Tuesday night, AP got a text about the C list actor which said something to the effect of, "you remember that guy who hated (Adam Sandler) in (Happy Gilmore). He is sitting on a couch just about having sex with two girls." It went on to describe some more details and the fact that the writer thought he was old and gross, but it was not necessary for the blind item. Now, I know the person AP got the text from and that person has been known to have 1 or 10 or 20 drinks in a night. So, in this case, the text is just a starting point. She may very well have her movies confused, especially if there are tons of movies with the same guy or he plays the same type of character. So, I check to see if that individual was where he was alleged to be. This is not as easy as checking Getty and WireImage, etc. Celebrities only do red carpets if they want to, and if there are no inside photos and they chose not to do the red carpet, then you better hope someone else was at that party that you know. In this instance I actually did know someone who was at the party and he had seen the same thing.
Christopher McDonald

--This used to be A list television actress has been rumored to be having marital problems. Last night she was spotted leaving a restaurant alone. Whoops, not quite alone. Two seconds after she emerged, our mystery guy walked quickly in the opposite direction also alone. No he wasn't the valet or a waiter and he had a big smile on his face. Wonder if the husband knows. Wonder why our actress decided to sign autographs last night after dinner when she never usually does. Courteney Cox- (soon to not be) Arquette (had dinner at Il Sole last night alone. Again.)

--This Irish sounding singer showed up last night to an event almost in tears. When asked what was wrong she admitted that her long term relationship was finally over. Catherine McPhee

--What blogger really ticked off MTV Australia by releasing the names of hosts and performers scheduled for the Australian VMA's before they were supposed to be made public? Perez Hilton

--Randy Rubber has been a very bad boy. This Oscar-winning actor is, indeed, married, but somethin' tells me it ain't a happy union. 'Cause if it were, he wouldn't be trolling for tail on the side. I mean, Hollywood husbands (and wives!) are known for shtupping people in every hotel suite (and stall) from Bev Hills to friggin' Pasadena, but R.R. is just so damn obvious about it. At a recent shindig, he told one gal that she looked like the first female he'd ever slept with. He went on to ask where she lived so he could come over and take a trip down mattress-memory lane. When said sistah revealed where her abode was located, he replied, "Good...that's far away from my wife!" Wonder if the spouse knows about his hideously horny hijinks? Is their whole relationship a front for their kids (and his rep), or somethin'? Methinks she's got her own badass sitch goin' down, as well. And It Ain't: Warren Beatty; Tom Hanks; Morgan Freeman
Cuba Gooding Jr.

--And speaking of fakes, Blood E. Nostril, once known as one of America's little honeys, is, in my admittedly jaded eyes, no longer just that! The awkward teen turned bodacious babe seems to have a penchant for a little recreational fun on the side, if ya know what I mean. According to a very reliable source, during Blood's school days, she filled her nights with hard partyin' at the local pubs 'n' clubs, and her idea of a good time included the snortin' of illegal substances in the bathrooms and basements of bars. You see, after growin' up playin' roles as the "good girl," Ms. Nostril wanted to let loose a little. So, she went out to be a regular girl and experience the college life, as sooo many a young starlet does—and fails at, usually quite miserably. Blood-babe began to take up with middle-aged married men—and I don't mean for humpin'. She was just usin' these clueless dudes for a little nose candy to fuel her already brain-cell-destroying ways. Nice. And It Ain't: Ashley Olsen; Natalie Portman; Alicia Silverstone Claire Danes

Since it's Blind Friday, thought I'd also give you the latest on Toothy Tile. Hear he's not really planning on adopting a kiddo, as I previously broke a few weeks ago. Nope. I was—gasp!—wrong. Turns out T2, so blab our mutual amigos, plans on swirling up his love juice, right alongside his boyfriend's procreating protein, ya know, putting it in some kinda beaker or toaster, or something, and mixing it around with a donor's eggs, then putting the results into yet another donor to carry the resulting embryo. The plan is, Boyfriend Tile will then, legally (and far, far away from pokin' press types like yours truly) be listed as papa—when, in fact, our beloved Tooth just may be the correct daddio. Oh, the lengths scaredy-cat cats will go to in order to cover up their preferred meowing ways. So damn silly. Why the hell can't the dudes be more like roarin' hons such as Melissa Etheridge and Tammy Lynn Michaels, spouses and partners who are proud of whom they purr 'n' poke at? ORIGINAL BLIND ITEM:
Jake Gyllenhaal

36. TV Guide/Ausiello Report 03/16
Leading Man's Good-guy Image All an Act: You know what's even worse than a really good person getting a bad rep? A really bad person getting a good one, which is exactly what this week's blind-item entry is about. A certain prime-time heartthrob is perceived by the public and the press as being one of the nicest guys in the biz. But behind the scenes, nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, his costars on a certain top-10 hit despise him with every fiber of their beings. Why? For starters, he feels as if his job is beneath him (yeah, like his outside credits are any great shakes), and that's nowhere more apparent than at the show's weekly table readings. According to one spy, "He comes in, picks up the script, flips through it, grunts a few times and tosses it aside." Even worse, Eddie Egomaniac thinks call times are for little people (i.e., other people). So he doesn't show up two or three minutes late for a scene, he shows up two or three hours late. Says my mole, "The show loses a ton of money waiting around for him to come to work." And when he does show up, he "doesn't say the lines as written." So who's this Satan in sheep's clothing? Guess away!
Patrick Dempsey/"Grey's Anatomy"

37. US MAGAZINE 03/16
--Traveling toker - Before her divorce, this acress was so desperate to get high that she sent her assistant out to wander the streets of London in search of marijuana.
Jennifer Aniston while filming "Derailed" in London

--Medicine woman - Everyone knows this babe had a serious drug problem, but not many know one of her substances of choice was Purp, a drink made by mixing fruit punch and a cough syrup containing codeine and promethazine, creating a supersweet sedative. Anna Nicole Smith

--Daughter dearest - What goes on inside the home of one of Hollywood's most famous families? One night, the daughter invited 10 friends over to party, and the group snorted lines of cocaine off the marble floor in Mom and Dad's bathroom. Dakota Johnson (daughter of Melanie Griffith and Don Johnson); Rumer Willis (daughter of Demi Moore and Bruce Willis)

--Man of the people - Last year, this half of a famous couple could be regularly seen driving around local public housing projects, attempting to score crack. How did anyone know it was him? Only a megastar could afford his expensive set of wheels. Bobby Brown

--Late riser - When this reformed bad girl used to stay for long periods at one historic Beverly Hills hotel, she required a special wake-up call each morning: a designate staffer had to pull the actress out of bed and stick her in a cold shower in order to sober her up from the night before. Then she would head off to her movie set. Lindsay Lohan "Chateau Marmont"

--Tinkle toss - One night in Vegas, this coked-up social diva asked to be taken to a private bathroom - which happened to be in the kitchen. En route, she pulled up her dress and relieved herself on the kitchen floor. The staffer tried to point out her mistake, but she just laughed and returned to the party. Paris Hilton

--Little Miss Bling - That oversize jewelry you see a certain starlet wearing? It's a multifaceted accessory. Once at an NYC club, she was spotted opening her cocktail ring and pouring white powder onto a table. Nicole Richie; Mary Kate Olsen

--So she shares a name with a female former party legend. She is supposed to be clean and sober, but that was just so not the case the other night. Another question is where is she getting it? Is she getting it from one of her minders, because she is rarely ever alone anymore.
Tara Conner, Miss USA

--So this actress/singer recently dealt with a stalker and does not need anything out of the ordinary. So when this very rich guy took more than a passing interest in her and began sending gifts and flowers she did not find it fun or flattering and was just downright scared. Overreaction? probably, but everyone would be a little nervous in her shoes. Hilary Duff

39. NY POST 03/19
WHICH multi-Oscar-winning leading man is not aging gracefully? While the ladies say he's great between the sheets, they get turned off by his bizarre nocturnal habit of using a chamber pot by his bed instead of the toilet.
Jack Nicholson

40. BILLY MASTER 03/19
Could it be that a certain party involved in the Anna Nicole saga has sold their soul to the devil? They actually sold it for a seat at the funeral, a prominent place back in the fold, and a nice chunk of change that was wired into a personal bank account for services rendered. What services were those? A high profile interview, which so easily could have gone the wrong way and done a bit of damage. But, trust me - the rift between these two former friends is hardly healed.
Kimmie Walther, Anna's former personal assistant

41. HOLY MOLY 03/19
--The Queen and I: Rumours continue to percolate that a certain tousle-haired publishing and media mover has sexual knowledge of a very famous, high-profile actress. The older lady is a British acting institution whose trophy-polishing duties have recently increased to the tune of one. The gentleman, who may not have helped his cause by bragging about the encounter like a schoolboy who's just had his first brush with a gusset, has contacted Holy Moly to put the record straight. In his own words... "Where the fuck did you get that from? I didn't shag her, but we snogged and she was wanking me off when my mate walked in on us." The corkscrew-haired Casanova!
Helen Mirren and Richard Branson

--Which actress, recently in the news for a short illness, is well-known to the staff at the Portland Clinic? One staff member reckons that if said actress had a loyalty card stamped for each of the abortions she'd had carried out there (during her short-lived marriage) then she'd have earned enough for her own personal scrape and vac machine by now. (This is a British blog, so I believe they may be referring to a clinic at The Portland Hospital in London, a private women's and children's hospital where a lot of British celebrity babies are born.) Billie Piper

Follow-up from 03/14..
1. So this actor she worked with before is very C list, but, EVERYONE knows him for one very important relationship. She says he is neither gay nor straight. She says that he is kind of asexual rather than bi-sexual. He is just so shy and afraid of hurting someones feelings that he will go out with whatever sex asks. She also said he is definitely not a take charge kind of guy and doesn't care about anything except making the other person happy. She said his non-sexual relationships are just the same and it gets really annoying after about a day and she just has no desire to work with him again. He just refuses to answer a question or make a decision and you just want to scream when you talk to him.

2. There is this other guy she knows who EVERYONE would also know even though he is not a celebrity. He has been with lots and lots of women including lots of celebrities and celebutantes. LOTS. The thing is that he has a very tough time performing and just prefers watching. Watching other couples or the girl he is with or two girls. He pretends he is all manly and virile, but the only way he can be that is with Viagra and lots of watching. She says the only way he can usually finish is to do it himself. Figures. HINT: He is set to have a very big December. Will he get an Academy Award nomination for his new movie? Harvey Weinstein (Producer "August: Osage County")

This guy was a looker, but he never made it as an actor. Luckily, he had a trust fund and was always a big spender so he ran with the hot crowd in Hollywood. His trust fund fizzled out and he was forced into prostitution! He met an incredibly wealthy Mexican playboy whose father has billions, and they became close friends. The playboy worships the failed actor and he pays for everything when they go out. As our guy became more financially dependent on the playboy, the kid with the money started demanding "affection." Now our unsuccessful actor is "gay for pay" and he doesn't know any other way to support himself in style.
Ashley Hamilton

44. 3 A.M. GIRLS 03/20
WHICH sexy pop star checks her bloke's phone whenever he leaves it lying around? She suspects him of cheating (again!) but is determined not to let him stray.

45. NY DAILY NEWS 03/20
Which pretty young thing, who makes the picture pages because of her friendship with a former First Child, is having an affair with the married head of a major studio?

46. NY POST 03/20
--WHICH socialite was conspicuously absent from the front row during Fashion Week because she was in rehab? The bride-to-be went to a "special spa" to conquer her cocaine habit before the wedding.
Gillian Hearst; Lauren Davis

--WHICH celebrity mom joins her daughter in snorting lines of cocaine? Melanie Griffith and daughter Dakota

--WHICH soulful singer is bulimic? Friends are concerned the stress of having a new album is causing her to throw up her meals. Amy Winehouse; Corinne Bailey Rae; Joss Stone

--WHICH funnyman is having an affair? His wife doesn't mind - she's got her money and her status to keep her company. Chris Rock; Dan Ackroyd

--I don't even know why I bother to make this one blind. It will take everyone about five seconds to guess it. This actress who seems to travel as much as she changes boyfriends was spotted in LA yesterday. With a new city comes a new boyfriend. The only problem was the guy she set her sights on and flirted shamelessly with finally came out and told her he was gay. Her response. "Are you sure?"
Kirsten Dunst

--The blog's favorite spy was at it again yesterday. So when people come out of rehab, aren't they supposed to be sober? This person was so obnoxious and so rude and so obviously wasted out of his mind. Jonathan Rhys Meyers

--This television host was practically yelling, "notice me, oh please notice me." She needs to decide if she wants to be a host or a performer. If she needs that much attention then she needs to go on a reality show. Paula Abdul

--This person's hands are not all that's large anymore. When she sees the photos she is going to go NUTS. Paris Hilton

--Imaginary conversation--"What do you do for a living?" "Oh, I'm a porn star." "Me too. Well not full time of course. We should do a porno together." Jenna Jameson & person who shall not be named

--This female reality star was so sweet. Don't believe all the stuff you read about her because I don't think most of it is true. Stacy Keibler

48. NY DAILY NEWS 03/21
Which gay movie actor is going to be "caught" by this week's tabloids dating a TV actress whose show was canceled? Strangely, neither has any upcoming projects listed on their pages. Hope it works out for you, kids!
Hayden Christensen and Rachel Bilson

49. PEREZ HILTON 03/21
What celebretard has a tattoo on the inside of one of his arms of an alternating black-white star, which is the exact design that a lot of heroin addicts get, because it allows them to find the vein even when they're totally fucked up???? It could be the reason for his greasy, feral acne face (and how skinny he is)! P.S. Here's a hint: we've posted about him very recently. Aaron Carter

LENA 2.0: Remember back in the day, when Alias wanted Lena Olin to return to the show so badly, they offered her an insane amount of money, but she turned it down? Well, here's a little ditty that goes something like that... (Reminder: We don't name names when it comes to Stumpers, but that doesn't prevent you all from doing your darnedest to figure it out below!)
Lena 2.0 is a fan favorite (and Kristin favorite) who starred in the very first episode of a Hit Show we fans get a little nutty about. He (yes, he—perhaps I should have called him Leonard instead of Lena?) was written off the show toward the end of last season, and from what I hear, he wasn't so happy about getting the boot. Neither were his costars. Well, fast-forward to a few weeks ago, when the producers of Hit Show called up Lena—oh, heck, let's call the poor guy Leonard so he can preserve his dignity—and asked him to return for the season finale. They were sure he'd say yes. After all, the whole season was leading up to his return! But much to their surprise—you know what's coming, right?—Leonard said no. Again and again and again. To increasingly obscene amounts of money. See, it turns out Leonard's pride is priceless. So now, Hit Show's producers have quite a storyline conundrum on their hands: What to do without the return of Leonard? Guess we'll have to wait and see...but to be honest, I'm not worried. These guys haven't failed me before. Harold Perrineau, aka Michael/"Lost"

1. These same two first name guys must be really tired today. Both male and female models spent the night with these two. Spies said there were at least three models of each sex available for use and both partook heavily. Unknown is who did whom or if they shared. One thing is certain. If you need security to pass up people to your room, maybe you should slip them a few bucks so they stay quiet. Also, maybe you should keep the noise level down so they don't have to come into the room and see you in a state or position in which you probably do not want to be seen.
David Hasselhoff and Dave Navarro

2. OK, one more, and I won't even make it blind. First on my life. DR is just a nickname. It has no reference to anything or anyone. For some reason when I met her I had just watched Dickie Roberts and so stranger danger was in my head. There has been no scrogging going on with anyone.

52. NY DAILY NEWS 03/22
Which hunky male-model-turnedTV-actor has a nasty surprise for new friends? The kind that comes with a prescription for Valtrex?
Jason Lewis

53. Popbitch 03/22
--Which troubled model has overdosed on cocaine three times recently, got scared and called the emergency services, but then straightened up by the time the ambulance had arrived so sent them packing, claiming she hadn't been the one to make the call?

--This celebrity couple may be heading for the altar but the groom-to-be still has a roving eye. He's been getting bouncers at his favourite night-spots to do the dirty work for him so his missus doesn't find out and they still make it to the church on time.

54. TV Guide/Ausiello Report 03/22
This week's blind item is so depressing, you may want to shield your eyes. It concerns a comedy series that enjoys a cult following, tons of buzz and heaps of critical praise. Unfortunately, the laffer in question lacks support where it counts the most: at the very network that airs it. You see, an influential suit at the net thinks the show is about as funny as a root canal, and is flummoxed by its appeal. He/she proved this by passing the laffer over for a major promotion earlier this season — a sleight that left members of the media (yours truly included) scratching their heads. Basically, said big shot would be more than happy to permanently clear it from the sked, and the program's modest ratings may be just the excuse he/she needs. There's just one problem: Because the knee-slapper isn't perceived as a "bubble show," there are no fan campaigns being organized to help save it. In other words, there's a very real chance this endangered series could be put out to pasture in May with nary a postcard mailed or petition signed. And I can't think of anything less funny than that. So, any guesses? I hate to say it, but this show's very future probably depends on you figuring it out.
"How I Meet Your Mother"

LA Fashion Week Leftovers....
--So what does it mean when you go around bragging about how much you are going to make off a video when you have been saying all along that none of it was your idea and that you had no idea it would ever be released? Does _______ know about you and the tall pierced one? (I know you know the blank, but don't want to make it too obvious which is why I put it there.)
Kim Kardashian/Ray J/Dennis Rodman

--When you are a star female movie actress during your teenage years and you do a bunch of drugs, then it is entirely possible that 20 years later no one will understand anything you are saying or mumbling. This actress made about as much sense as a Peter Gabriel video. Ione Skye

--This young singer was so clean cut and cool even just a year ago. Now, he looks like a washed out wreck with a beer gut. One woman he was hitting on asked who he was. He said, I'm __________. She said he looked really different on television, and that he needed to take a shower. Ryan Cabrera

Depressed and directionless and bitterly disappointed over recent professional failures and feeling stifled by a ruthless mentor, she is apparently on the verge – like a Britney verge. Except in her case, she’s lucky the pappies don’t have so much access. Wild, wild partying and an endless cocktail of serious drugs supplied by an unsavoury group of new friends who are as degenerate as they come, relentlessly pushing their poisons into her body. And apparently she’s too messed up to stand up and walk out. Word is she’s either "out of it" half the time or so wild on tilt with insatiable chemical appetite that even her people can barely control her. She has been late or absent from a few recent engagements and while she was fortunate enough to have her team make new arrangements on the fly, her reputation is beginning to suffer…though that’s not the biggest problem. The old friends fear the new friends are taking her down a dangerous path. Recent night out – by the end of the evening she was limp and lifeless and supposedly serviced by two different men and also at one point full on making out with another woman. She’s also been known to go missing, totally unreachable for hours at a time, and when she resurfaces, she’s a frightful mess. Of course there are those trying to help her. And some days, she knows and she tries. But when the night comes and that crowd is calling, it’s trouble all over again. Not Lindsay.
Sienna Miller

Deartha Death has always been one of my fave H-town fixtures. She's so nasty. She's so raunchy. She's so...watchable! And she knows it, too. That's why D2 has staged yet another "comeback," of sorts. Thing is, I've never really understood quite what it is D.D. went away from. Her talent has always been so, uh, hard to define. I mean, really, her best achievement, as far as I'm concerned, has been Deartha-dear's ability to keep us wondering just what the eff she's gonna pull next. Which is what this item is about. As she's done so many times before, D.D.'s gone to great lengths to set up a series of publicity interviews and photo sessions round her latest dubious creative endeavor. And, per usual, sundry journalistic entities bit. Including Totally Inside publication, which had set up an expensive shoot around said project. But, quelle surprise, Ms. D. called up and canceled, saying she had a tummy ache or some lame excuse, all last minute, 'course. Death was simply expecting the mag to call back and reskedge, as Deartha's forced upon many an outlet before (and will no doubt do again). However, Totally's editor had heard through the proverbial e-grapevine that Deartha was, once again, too high to function—the real reason why she had called off the shoot. So, the media honcho called up Death directly. "Look," the editor fumed across the receiver, "I'm not a 12-stepper. I have no problem with you getting high. But you better get something straight," the exec type practically blazed before she went in for the chicly suited kill: "You cancel on me again like that, we're pulling this shoot so fast, you won't know what hit you—faster than those stupid animals of yours pee everywhere." Oh, did I forget to tell you D.D. is a big four-footed fan? And Deartha is now cooperating with all press requests. Fully (if not a tad wobbly). And it Aint: Tara Reid, Jennifer Holiday, Janice Dickinson
Pam Anderson

--This pin-up B list television actress from the 80's and early 90's has disappeared from public view. Within the last week she has shut down her website and MySpace page. After a long dry spell she was resurrecting her career and her personal life, but now she seems to be pulling the plug on all of it. There is a rumor floating around that she has cancer and another that she just doesn't want to be bothered with the business anymore and is going to hide in a far corner of the world for several years.
The pin-up blind item. You remember it don't you? OK, so here's an update. The MySpace page is back up, but that is the only thing people have heard from her. No website. No nothing. When you finally figure it out and go to the MySpace page, read her blog to see if you can understand her disappearance. The Goonies provides such a big clue. I know you can do it. Nicole Eggert

--How many times have I told celebrities to drive themselves? Well the same thing holds true for parking your car yourself. If you must let a valet take your car, then make sure you clean up or hide everything of note in the car. Speaking of valets, there is a rumor that one tab paid a valet to hide a wireless camera in a celeb car. The valet got it in the car and it worked for about five minutes until the celeb hit a pothole and the transmission ceased.
1. This B list made for tv movie actor who once had aspirations to be a real movie actor left a little tiny plastic bag in the cup holder of his car. This little tiny bag had some brown powder in it. Now of course I am sure his publicist would say it was brown sugar, but the valet had never seen someone jump so fast into their car when the valet returned it. After retrieving the bag, our actor smiled with a huge look of relief plastered on his face. Nicholas Brendon (tv movies in 2006 and 2007)
2. This soon to be married B list television actress on a hit network show left her car with the valet and the valet saw a tube of Zovirax on the front passenger seat floor. Now, our actress was with two other female friends (unknown if celebrities) so it is possible it belonged to one of them. No one has ever talked about this actress and herpes before, but people are talking about it now. Sure are a lot of air kisses from 2 feet away now. (NOT Eva L., and honestly wouldn't wish the herp on anyone)

--"I wanna see it. I wanna see it too." Several women convinced this not very shy singer to show everyone his famous appendage. He teased but did not deliver the goods. He did however go home with his ex-fiancee. Kimberly Stewart and Cisco Adler

59. HOLY MOLY 03/23
Thanks to a friend in the theatre, a Mole was given the chance to interview a fine British luvvie for his college newspaper, way back in 2003, and was promised ten minutes after the show with the great man. But who was it? Enjoying the play (Ibsen's 'Brand' in Haymarket), the Mole nipped backstage to thank his friend at the interval, to be confronted by the sight of the thespian ushering an usherette urgently into his dressing room during the ten minute break, trousers already tented at an angle. Surely not? In a ten minute break? With an usherette? When said thesp was already famously involved with a much-older (and willing to turn a blind eye to her priapic beau) actress? He managed to do the deed with five minutes to spare, emerging from the room with a grin on his face and actually zipping up his fly like a cad in a seventies porno. The play resumed and the Mole enjoyed the second act greatly, laughing continuously. Laughing at the famously grim Ibsen. During a play about a man witnessing the death of his wife and child... But what could be so funny? The Mole, from his seat on the front row, could see copious amounts of spunk littering the front of the great man's trousers and glowing heartily in the spotlights, like slug trails on a sunbaked patio. Ralph Fiennes

60. NY DAILY NEWS 03/25
Which pop diva makes her friend go out undercover to get fried chicken so her mom doesn't find out?
Joss Stone

61. 3 A.M. GIRLS 03/26
WHICH Hollywood hardman got intimate with his award-winning costar on their new movie. All he'll say is "what happens on set stays on set". Or in the hotel in his case.
Bruce Willis/Halle Berry

62. NY DAILY NEWS 03/26
Which L.A. celebrity couple who split and got back together broke up because she was sleeping with a household-name champion athlete on the side?
Shanna Moakler and Travis Barker/Oscar de la Hoya

--This cusp A List actor often takes his teenage daughter out with him. She sometimes invites a friend. That friend is actually a friend of the actor and the daughter is cover. Jamie Foxx
(this may not seem like much the first time you read it. I suggest reading it several times)

--Wow. A description is hard for this person because it would just give it right away. Not actress or singer, but probably wants to be one now that she will have time. Of course if she is pregnant like everyone is whispering, maybe that will delay things quite a bit. No word on the father. Hopefully she knows. I'm not saying if you got this one right or wrong. I'm just saying that the whispers are now full on murmurs. Going to have to decide what to do VERY soon. Playboy wants you. Are you going to do it or wait for the offers that aren't really going to come in, or are you going to make a public announcement about the murmurs or keep it private? Lauren Conrad

64. PEREZ HILTON 03/26
What recently rehabbed wild child was spotted getting her drink on Sunday night in Los Angeles???? Sources reveal exclusively to that the hard-pAArtying star was consuming copious amounts of alcohol quite publicly, while listening to the tunes of her lesbian DJ friend at LAX (the club in Hollywood, not the airport). Perhaps driving the troubled girl to drink was the presence of Wilmer Valderrama at the club with two Victoria's Secret models, spywitnesses tell us. The partying and drinking continued all weekend long for the firestarter. On Friday night, she was causing trouble at hotspot Les Deux and Saturday she hit Teddy's. here we come again!
Lindsay Lohan

65. NY POST 03/27
--A tale's maybe coming down about a married anchor who may get unmarried because there's a lover around.
Matt Lauer

--A tale's maybe not coming down about an anchor moving elsewhere due to his small drug problem.

66. NY DAILY NEWS 03/27
Which pop megastar celebrated his visit to NYC last week with an east Village gogo dancer and gay-for-pay rent boy? "he was fat, completely hairless and doesn't really like being touched," says the young gentleman. Elton John

--This aging former A list movie actor has always seemed washed up. Even his characters had that look about them. He has always been a drinker. Some drugs, but mainly a drinker. He always drinks before television appearances, no matter the time of day they are filmed. That has always happened. His most recent behavior is not. Lately when he gets drunk he has been going to all of his old homes at all hours of the day and night. He rings the bell and when the owner answers says he used to live there and then invites himself in. He basically crashes in the house for 3 or 4 hours. Sometimes he tells stories and other times he just mumbles. One family called the police, but our actor was not arrested. Nick Nolte

--So this fashion designer is having a big show tonight in LA. Although he has been down and out before, he has taken on a J-Hud divaesque kind of air about him. The only people invited tonight are the elite of the elite. Old friends and acquaintances shouldn't bother showing up. They aren't wanted. Jeffrey Sebelia, Project Runway

68. NY DAILY NEWS 03/28
Which "Beverly Hills, 90210" alum is supplementing a moribund acting career with a thriving business as a pot dealer?
Luke Perry

69. 3 A.M. GIRLS 03/28
WHO'S the skinny US star who stunned staff in a London restaurant by ordering a salad with no dressing and a Diet Coke - which she used to wash down a handful of laxatives.
Mischa Barton

--So at this talk show a few weeks ago, there was this band. Although she is not a solo act she might as well be because no one even knows who the hell any of the rest of the band are anyway. Well she trashed her dressing room at the show and said she needed her own room and that she needed to prepare alone. I think everyone knows what she wanted to do alone which is why they wanted her in the same room with the rest of the band. She yelled at the producers and crew and it took the host to calm her down and convince her to come out and perform.
Amy Lee from Evanesence

--So when celebs are out of the country they can get away with acting really strange. Usually. This A list film actor decided to take advantage of his recent foray to another country. (This wouldn't work in the UK, so skip it when thinking about it) The actor went to a shop that catered to the plus sized woman and walked out about 30 minutes later in women's clothing. Apparently someone tried to take a cell phone pic of the actor but only caught him from behind. When the person tried to catch up with the actor, he turned around and advised her to mind her own business and she was too shocked to just hold up the damn phone and take the pic. No word on where the actor went. John Travolta

Reba the Reality Diva: Reba is kind of a famous. Even though she didn't win her show, per se, she has a nice, devoted fan base and some serious onscreen ass...ets. This is why Reba decided she needed to star in the new movie written by a certain TV actor (and writer and director and ladies' man, swoon) whom we'll call Lothario Luther. Now here's where it gets fun. At a recent soiree, Reba marched right up to Luther and said, "You should have me as the star of your next film." But, see, Luther had never seen Reba act (nor has anyone else) so he politely told her he'd consider it, then, somewhat miraculously, actually offered her a guest spot on his beloved ('round here anyway) TV show. So what did Reba do? She turned him down. I'm guessing that means she's set her sights on the big screen now...much like that Jennifer what's-her-name.
Reba the Reality Diva: Kellie Pickler
Lothario Luther:
Zach Braff

One Pooftah Putz Blind Vice: Yeah, well, Slurpa Pop_Off’s hair extensions were just falling out the other night at a fancy-ass party—I'm so riveted by that one, aren't you all, my jaded nelly-jellies? Really, I am. Nevertheless, I'm going to go with a new member of the Blind Vice family—though, I must say, what earns her a mention in these asshole annals of abhorrent Hell-Ay behavior among the rich and stupid, is, well, utterly stupidola (and nothing new)! Read on: Apple Marvini has it all (and I mean all). She's loaded as s--t. She's fairly well dressed, still got a decent bod. She gives regularly to charity, she's not without talent and she's newly searching for a legalized mattress mate—such fun when money's no object, n'est-ce pas? But perhaps that's just the prob. The only guys A.M. seems to attract (including her most promising current prospect for a union) are those who are also into the majorly moneyed habits, not so much activities involving multiple climaxes and cleaning up the sheets afterward. Yes, like many a less well-off gal throughout the nation, Ms. Em has found herself hankering for a dude who cares more about having his undies starched than dirtying up hers. Why do women do this, time after time? Granted, making the help cry can be sickly fascinating (A. and her "man" do this equally adeptly), but isn't holding the one you love—and lust for—till the sun comes up worth anything? Not to A.M., apparently. As she has, after all, made it quite clear she's not overly fond of what that cuddling (and accompanying commotion) produced with her last man. AND IT AIN’T: Martha Stewart, Oprah Winfrey, Kate Hudson
Jennifer Aniston

73. TV Guide/Ausiello Report 03/29
For this week's blind-item entry, I'm adding an exciting new feature: a happy ending! Of course, this being a blind item, the story starts off in familiar territory — with yet another out-of-control, egomaniacal TV diva. This prima donna's evil streak dates back to his/her show's first season, when said individual was known to constantly make negative remarks about the scripts, refused to say lines as written and balked at working long hours. During subsequent seasons, the chip on this star's shoulder only grew more pronounced, to the point where he/she began demanding big story arcs and emotional scenes, resulting in some of the more bombastic (even silly) moments in the show's history. Well, this season, the unruly celeb decided it was time to take matters into his/her own hands and get more involved in the creative process — an opportunity his/her bedraggled peers seized. They gave their troublemaking star a crash course in TV 101, allowing him/her to see, and participate in, the process that he/she has for so long held in contempt. And guess what? The hothead learned that making an hourlong TV show is hard. To his/her utter amazement, weeks — sometimes even months — of planning go into arcs and plotlines that he/she has, in the past, derailed by refusing to read dialogue as written. Now you-know-who has a newfound respect for the production team and even views them as his/her colleagues (as opposed to his/her minions). Better yet, word on the set is that his/her chip has virtually vanished, making him/her a far easier person to work with. It almost makes your heart melt. So, any guesses?

74. POPBITCH 03/29
Which rock star is known for liking a lot of oral attention while away on a video shoot or tour? Groupies are looking to cop a good feel this year as he's back on tour.
Sting "The Police"

So this female actress thinks she is A list. She has been the subject of at least a few blind items on this blog and she allegedly has a new boyfriend. What they really have is a shared secret. She has a BIG movie coming out this summer and knows she needs to behave. They have been friends for a long time and he knows all her secrets. She knows his secret too. His career has not been going so great in the music business lately so you think it would be ok for him to say he plays for the same team. They will play kissy-poo for the cameras until after the publicity is done for the movie. She tried to make a deal with someone else recently but he didn't bite.

Actress: Kristen Dunst "Spiderman"
Boyfriend: Razorlight singer Johnny Borrell
Didn't bite: Fabrizio Moretti

76. HOLY MOLY 03/30
--You may remember the story last week about a certain fine British actor who was so obsessed with sex that he took advantage of a ten minute theatre interval to indulge himself, before returning to the stage with semen caked on his trousers. Further tales have reached us about the gland young man of British theatre. Earlier in his career he was renowned for being difficult to work with. That is until he had spilled his seed, after which he was as playful as a pussycat. Unfortunately, said milking was required at least three times a day or he would descend into a black rage and be a nightmare to work for, or with. At the opening night of one show it became clear to those in the know that the actor was somewhat backed-up in the trouser region, hence his snarling responses to questions from journalists. And it was plain to see that this would, without doubt, adversely influence the tone of the reviews the following day. His PR woman did the decent thing and took one on the chin for the troupe, taking the actor into a nearby cupboard and administering a soothing massage. Within five minutes the thespian was charm personified, his personality as dainty as a Persian cat pissing on silk. The actor enthralled the waiting critics with his measured views of the performance and his wonderful bonhomie. With the added bonus that the PR woman had ensured that the front of his trousers did not appear to be covered in 'greasepaint'.
Ralph Fiennes

--Which celebrity chef blew his top (amongst other things) when an unsuspecting waiter walked into the kitchen at the end of the evening's service? The white-coated wanker was giving a kitchen porter some instructions on the finer points of broiling a sausage. Or rather, he was shouting "Harder! Suck harder!" at the top of the (male) porter's head whilst the underpaid skivvy fellated the great chef, jaws whizzing like a Magimix. It seems that the man has a voracious appetite for either gender, as he is renowned for having energetic, grunty and extremely loud sex with a waitress in Soho. The night before his wedding... Now THAT's worth shouting about, you fucker! Gordon Ramsay

--This B list movie actor who used to always be in A list movies but now, not so much has often been rumored to be gay. Everyone just kind of assumes it. What you maybe didn't know is that this actor doesn't like relationships because of the potential for getting caught. He also is very germaphobic so he specializes in one type of relationship. Most, if not all of the time, the only men he finds interesting or an attraction to, are those who are virgins. He likes to be their first. Kevin Spacey

--You (B List actress) really have him fooled with that we're just friends thing don't you? Everyone knew the two of you were getting it on several months ago and you were really worried that your man might break off your relationship when he heard the news. Most people would deny and deny and never see the person again. You on the other hand play by your own rules and did the exact opposite. Bring him out in public again and really convince the world he is just your "friend." You've got your man convinced but someday he is going to wake up next to you. After screaming when he sees your unmade up face he will realize he's been had. Eva Longoria & Mario Lopez or Jamie Foxx

--Do you ever write your own jokes? For someone who has been accused of stealing jokes so much recently, you think that
maybe someone would be watching you more closely. Just because a guy is dead doesn't mean you can steal his jokes.

Carlos Mencia/Richard Jeni

78. NY DAILY NEWS 04/01
Which gorgeous New York City actress cheated on her (now ex) actor-model boyfriend with another woman?
Rosario Dawson/Jason Lewis

79. ON THE DL 04/01
Spring has sprung, the new baseball season is finally upon us, and On The DL is officially back!! To make up for our extended absence, we decided to give you 4 mini blind items instead of just one. We hope you enjoy the items as well as the upcoming season. We know we will.

1. Say Cheese: Which NL left fielder apparently isn’t too fond of posing for photos? For starters, he broke a young fan’s heart by refusing to sign an autograph or take a picture with him. When the boy asked him to reconsider, he completely ignored him and walked away. Things got a bit more complicated a few weeks later at a Playboy themed event in Atlantic City. Everything was going well until the player in question’s image was accidentally snapped in the background of a photo that a man had taken of himself and one of the bunnies. This sent the player into a rage. He called for his bodyguard and demanded that the poor guy hand over his camera immediately. The man refused but was pressured into deleting the semi- incriminating photo on his digital camera while the angry player looked on. We assume he didn’t want the media or his brand new fiancée knowing about his night on the town. The funny thing is that the man he harassed was not even much of a baseball fan and did not have the slightest clue as to who the player was. Ouch! Talk about a blow to the ego. Pat Burrell

2. Oops, He Did It Again: Which infamous baby makin’ machine is at it yet again? The most potent sperm in all of baseball recently became a proud parent for what we believe is the 4th time, although we may have missed a kiddie or two along the is easy to lose count after awhile. The baby mama is a lovely lady from the California area, whom he met during a road trip toward the end of last season. Maybe he should just give up on the baseball career [it wasn’t working out all that well for him last year anyway] and look into forming a sperm donor club or something along those lines. Cheers to a never-ending supply of bottles, binkies, and bibs. Let’s just hope that the baby doesn't inherit daddy’s temper. A toddler tackling another kid on the see-saw isn’t the ideal way to spend a play date. Kyle Farnsworth

3. Rehab Is For Quitters: Which supposedly reformed bad boy has reportedly hit a few bumps along the road to sobriety? A source claims that the recently bulked up cutie pie was spotted feeling no pain on several occasions in bars with women who were most certainly not his wife during spring training. On the positive side, none of this seems to be having an adverse effect on his job status, as his manager seems hell bent on getting him a fulltime position with the team regardless of which veteran players might get pushed aside to make room for him. The manager is so enamored with him that he has even gone as far as to arrange photo-ops which portray his prized player as a good family man. The photo session might have gone better had the player in question been given enough time to sober up from the night before. Josh Hamilton from the Devil Rays

4.Party Of Three: Which semi-talented AL east relief pitcher recently and very awkwardly approached two barely legal ladies in a bar and had the following oh so hot conversation with them. It generally consisted of pitcher boy asking them if they "like to be in bed together" upon first meeting them. When he was met with an abrupt no, he began to chat with them about their school taking every opportunity to tell them that they went to his alma mater and that he is "a major athlete". When they finally recognize him and were still unimpressed, he proceeded to buy them drinks, leave them with his number, and make at least two more attempts to try and persuade them into having a threesome with him. Needless to say, the girls somehow managed to resist the smooth talk and prestige of hanging with this "major athlete" and left him to return to his hotel room alone sans the threesome that he so desperately wanted. Better luck next time, loser.

80. NY DAILY NEWS 04/02
Which current NFL player is telling pals he is seriously considering coming out of the closet while he's still on his NFC team?
Michael Strahan, New York Giants; Donovan McNabb, Philadelphia Eagles; Dhani Jones, Philadelphia Eagles

Could it be that those two up-and-coming Hollywood hunks have hooked up? We all know they're best friends, but my sources say more than just a bit of spit is being swapped in private. Sure, one of them is hot and heavy with that oft-passed-around beard, but take it from someone who knows. - these gents know how to go down.

Hollywood Hunk #1:
Hollywood Hunk #2:

--When you make the transition from teen idol to out of work actor, the women who used to be everywhere are now just a nighttime memory. So, you always try and find the lamest parties with the hottest women and hope someone will remember you. They remember you when you remind them what show you used to be on and then you tell them you are working on several projects. The problem is that when it comes to leave, they think of you still as a kid. No problem. You made lots of money on the show and so offer to take one of the women "shopping" after the party and buy her something nice. She accepts. Now where are the paps when you need them? This way the world will see you've become a man. The last idea didn't work too well did it?
David Faustino; Scott Baio

--Note to actors--It's tax season. Your accountants are going to go through all your records. Sometimes they get busy and have members of their staff do the work. They are not highly paid and will sell your information. If they are really pissed they will just tell the world what you did. This B list actor on a hit television show always plays a good guy and is very popular. What would his fans think if they discovered that he gave $10,000 to a white power organization last year?

--This film actress is known more for having a great body rather than a great body of work. She finally got smart last year and it looked as if she was going to be single again. Why not? He was acting single and she wanted to be. But, alas, she got sucked back in again. Now they are one big happy family again despite the fact that he hasn't changed. No doubt we will see this cycle repeat over the next year.
Shannon Elizabeth/Joe Reitman

--This youngish television actor/actress couple are B/C listers. The actress made her way to The Kid's Choice Awards over the weekend. However she wouldn't let her significant other anywhere near the awards. Turns out he likes 15 and 16 year old girls. She tries to look young but knows she can't look that young. Usually when he meets his fans he always asks about their birthdays. If they're hot they can expect a call from our actor when they become legal and he will take them out for a very special birthday.

84. NY POST 04/04
--WHICH aging movie/TV actress has a son just released from the swanky Sierra Tucson rehab clinic where he was treated for depression?
Cybill Shepherd

--WHICH bejeweled social climber will do anything to associate her name with A-list actresses, even create bogus, salacious gossip to promote her faux "friendships"?

85. NY DAILY NEWS 04/04
Which two famous-for-going-to-parties Hollywood female best friends recently stayed in a hotel together? The maid had to call the manager to ask if she should wipe up the cocaine, or clean around it.

So this publicity hungry singer has a pretty bad reputation already. Seems that at a show he did not so long ago he went completely out of control. (He would've given Joe Francis a run for his money) Before the show even started he presented a challenge to his crew. "First one who scores 20 Xanax for me gets a plasma television." Thirty minutes later a member of the crew was looking at new plasmas on the internet. During this particular concert our singer was the opening act. Instead of retreating to the dressing room or his bus, the singer decided to hang around on the side of the stage. There were several attractive young women and he went up to each. While he was talking to them he would grab their butt and bring them closer to him. If they tried to get away he would grab them and make them struggle to get away. After the concert, the tour bus was crowded. Primarily on board were girls/women of the late teenage variety. Some were openly making out with members of the backing band and crew. Other girls/women were passed out. Those that were passed out were being drawn on with a Sharpie by our singer. His favorite thing to draw were pictures of male genitalia around their mouths and obscene words on any exposed part of their body. If there was not enough skin exposed he would expose it. If a girl was passed out and didn't have a friend with her to take her home, they would just leave the girl there passed out and drive to the next city. When the girl woke up, they would kick her off the bus, no matter the location and let her fend for herself. Of course they can choose a different option instead, but it involves every member of the band with the singer going first.
Howie Day (once dated Britney Spears/recent arrest)

This divorced Hollywood mogul is in no rush to tie the knot again - because he has his way with some of the hottest actresses in Hollywood! There are no emotional strings attached because each liason is a business deal. This wealthy guy trades perks for sex. He has a luxurious private jet at the disposal of women who don't mind giving up a little nooky. He has impossible-to-get box seats to sports events and vacation homes that he trades for sex. An impressive number of B-listers take him up on this tempting deal and a few A-list actresses are starting to come around. Harvey Weinstein

88. NY DAILY NEWS 04/05
Which megastar couple, whose torrid fling was first flagged in this column, consummated their acquaintance with a ménage à trois?

89. HOLY MOLY 04/05
Snog Monster: Which golf ball-eyed producer and actor lost his virginity a whole year before picking up his first prestigious comedy award? Which would make him 27 years old when he first sampled the delights of the hirsuite chalice.
Ricky Gervais' writing partner Stephen Merchant

--This '80s nighttime TV star has not aged well, but it's her personality that could use more augmentation. A hardworking small-screen actress early in her career, she became famous as a sweet and unassuming wife in a hotbed of scandal, but in recent years has found work harder to come by (and the lure of excessive plastic surgery irresistable). These days many would view getting cast with her about as fun as landing themselves in a leg-hold trap. At the end of one shoot, in addition to the usual logo-embellished crew jackets given out by the production team, a second set of "ordeal-by-fire" souvenirs were secretly handed around: t-shirts that read "I survived [production name] with [actress' name]!"
Joan Van Ark

--Despite oft-denied rumours of substance abuse and difficult behaviour, this onetime TV A-lister has continued to have a career as unlikely as the "plots" of her top-rated '70s series. Guest star roles and movies-of-the-week are a far cry from the pin-ups, dolls and lunchboxes that used to feature the faces of her and her costars, but in recent years her attitude and behavior are always somewhere between diva and demon. So hated was she on one particular set, seconds after her final scene wrapped and spies confirmed she'd left the lot, the director wheeled in a case of champagne he'd had chilling to thank his long-suffering crew. Kate Jackson

One Prime-Time Pissy Blind Vice: Trust, doll-pusses, just because Star Jones-Reynolds left network TV doesn't mean the once impeccably peopled, more polished outlets are without chest-stabbing, chutzpah-powered pricks who need to trim their nose hairs. I mean, these places have gotten downright pedestrian, cable-esque 'n' catty! Take Teri-Fairy Terrible, for ince. T.F.T., of majorly questionable sexuality, has been around. In so many ways. And, at first, Teri-sweetie was, indeed, working for a cable outfit. That was before the only medium good-looking (at best) personality figured out how to sleep with powerful playahs to get ahead—despite having a long-suffering spouse at home. And isn't it interesting that as the higher Teri-Fairy's media star seemed to rise, so, too, did Terrible's really terrible state of affairs at home? Teri's social graces, too, seem to have gone the way of the teleprompter-reader's once happy picket-fence scene. "You're so talented," Teri most insincerely oozed to a fellow (and also successful) boob-tube performer at a recent gathering of Terrible's media colleagues. The coworker knew some sort of dig was coming, and, sure enough, it predictably did, just as he was excusing himself from the Fairy-schmuck's vicinity. "It's a shame to see your competition eating you for lunch," T.F.T. got in, just in the knick of socially unacceptable time. Ah, any wonder why Teri has no friends—not to mention, any fam—left? Will that cushy gig be next? Karma's a bitch! AND IT AIN’T: Stone Phillips; Diane Sawyer; Barbara Walters
Matt Lauer/"Today" formerly local NYC news

92. POPBITCH 04/06
--Which jet-setting movie star is worrying his publicists by propositioning attractive male film journalists and then trying to make out he's just playing a character?
John Travolta

--Which boy-band singer got his break after sleeping with male music industry executives when under age and then informing them that he would tell on them unless he got a record deal? (remember, this is a UK newsletter) Ricky Martin

93. 3 A.M. GIRLS 04/06
WHICH US chart-topper is being forced to pay £20,000 a month to keep a former male conquest quiet. The bloke is threatening to tell the star's long-suffering girlfriend about his string of gay affairs.
P. Diddy and his umbrella holding valet, Fonzworth Bentley

1. This married B list actor on one of those initial shows has a side business. Nothing unusual in that by itself. However this business only has one employee. A woman who is not his wife. In addition, the "office space" is actually a condo. Well if you are going to have an affair, I guess you might as well try and deduct it from your income.

2. This former A list television actor from the 90's has had lots of problems in the past and has been the guess on this blog lots and lots of times. Turns out he's pretty generous. He gave $350,000 to his church last year, and another $100,000 to other charities.  Tim Allen (Tim Allen the springtime grinch grouches: "Easter should be about resurrection, not about rabbits and colored eggs.")

3. This divorced B list actress but A list celeb has her house mortgaged to the hilt. She doesn't have much money coming in from the ex, and not getting much high paying work. There is no more equity in the house and no more money to borrow anywhere. Look for her to be everywhere in the next few months and to do anything to get some money. It's either that or bankruptcy. Sharon Stone

4. This A list movie actor who brings in over $10M a film gave exactly $500 to charity in 2006. Happy Easter Mr. Generous. Mel Gibson

This rapper has yet to take his white girlfriend public but he lets her hang around his crew and people are whispering that she openly and often refers to him as the N-word and he does nothing about it. She once got into a heated argument with him and called him an f***ing n***er to his face. He just laughed it off as his boys sat nearby, stunned. What makes this situation even more pathetic, when one of his boys asked him, why do you tolerate her racist disrespect? He replied, ‘man, she don’t mean nothing by it, now, I would have a problem if a white man call me a n**ger but with the women-it’s like a term of endearment.’ If it couldn’t get any worse, this rapper’s core audience is black women (that’s why he hasn’t taken his girlfriend public) but behind closed doors, he says really nasty things about black women on a constant basis and he seems especially threatened by powerful black women. Hint: It’s not Ludacris
50 cent

96. NY POST 04/08
--WHICH bed-hopping groupie climbed up a long ladder of club riffraff before snagging the deejay superstar the rest of the deejays model themselves after?
Jessica Stam/DJ AM

--WHICH big-headed British celeb creeps people out because his assistant looks, acts, and dresses exactly like him?

97. NY DAILY NEWS 04/08
Which blond reality starlet who just fell out with the show's main draw is following a recent breast augmentation with a nose job this week? Heidi Montag

98. PEREZ HILTON 04/08
What bratty singer has a serious alcohol problem? She would drink and get drunk almost every single day while making her new album - even during daytime recording sessions, sources reveal to
Avril Lavigne

This black female celebrity has a house full of kids by at least 2-3 different men and she's miserable; she's also on welfare. She doesn’t receive child support from the men and she may be evicted soon. She can’t understand, a former boyfriend has money but refuses to share it with her and he knows she’s struggling. In the past, she hooked up with a white Hollywood powerbroker and she was bragging to friends, ‘my financial worries will be over soon.’ The powerbroker sexed her and moved on, she was devastated. She’s not getting any younger and there are less opportunities to snag a rich man.

black female celebrity: Shar Jackson [4 children: Donnie (1991); Cassie (1995); Kori (2002); Kaleb (2004)]
former boyfriend: Kevin Federline
Hollywood powerbroke: Quentin Tarantino

100. NY DAILY NEWS 04/09
Which famous fashion designer created for herself a pair of stilettos with hollow heels that snapped off to carry her drugs? Donatella Versace

101. Ausiello Report 04/09
You know what they say in Hollywood: It's never too early to start lining up your next gig. At least I think they say it. And if they don't, the subject of this week's blind item sure does. He's a series regular on a bubble show I mention, oh, about 90 times a week, and he's currently taking meetings with various TV producers about possible guest arcs/recurring roles next season. Even though his series hasn't officially been axed, he sure seems convinced that it will be, since he's throwing around words like "over" and "done" and "finished." And while it's not unheard of for actors who aren't sure about their shows' fates to put out feelers this time of year, only to end up back at the jobs to which they were originally committed (John Stamos getting stuck at Jake in Progress, for instance), this wannabe-free agent, per one spy, "Seemed pretty sure his days at this show were behind him." Hmmm... know who I'm talking about? You should, considering the huge-ass Easter egg I hid in plain sight for you. Go ahead, thank the Easter bunny.
Scott Patterson "Gilmore Girls"

Easter Sunday is supposed to be a time spent with family. OK, so I guess if you have the time and inclination you could maybe get in a round of golf. This married A list movie actor told his wife he needed to relax and so was going out to Palm Springs to play some golf. He showed up at the golf course. He went inside the pro-shop and gave the head pro a few hundred dollars and said that if his wife called to tell her that the actor was out on the course and no cell phones are allowed there. Then he was to call the actor's cell phone and tell him the wife called. The actor then left the pro shop with a woman who was not dressed to play golf and drove away. Now it's possible this twosome played golf somewhere else, but I think he was trying to put his ball into another cup if you know what I mean. **Note to other actors who try this. Spread the $$ around to all the staff at the shop so they don't go blabbing away.** Morgan Freeman

103. NY DAILY NEWS 04/10
Which buxom U.S. pop/R&B star was declined entry to a press-club room on a recent media tour of Japan until she covered up her famous assets with a less-revealing outfit?

104. 3 A.M. GIRLS 04/10
WHICH singer is fuming with a gay icon after he lost interest when his career was flagging?
Robbie Williams/Elton John

105. PEREZ HILTON 04/10
What hard-pAArtying actress is currently happily involved in a lesbian relationship with a third-rate DJ?
Lindsay Lohan/Samantha Ronson

So, this B list movie actor from a Top 20 2006 movie is A list to all of his fans except in one regard. Our actor has the most annoying girlfriend on the face of the earth. Seems this actor and girlfriend are regulars at a juice bar chain on S. Beverly. Well the girlfriend is just kind of obnoxious when she is with our actor, but it's a different story when she comes in alone. When she comes in alone, she's always on her cell phone, name dropping until there are no more names to drop. She talks about this party and that party and shopping she did and is going to do. She also orders drinks that aren't even on the menu but hushes the counter staff with a hand when they try and explain and goes back to her phone call. When she FINALLY gets off the phone and they tell her they don't have that drink, she does the "Don't you know who my boyfriend is?" Yes, they know who your boyfriend is, and they like him. What they don't like is you or the way you back up the line, your obnoxious laugh, your fake hair and breasts and the fact that you have no life.

We reported on this actor last year. Rewind: A friend set him up on a blind date with a white woman and he went ballistic because he only dates black women. Fast forward: People are wondering, what happened to him? He just up and disappeared from the screen. The answer: He is on grind trying to support numerous children in at least 7 states, by as many women. This man has children ranging in ages from 5-22. He continues to be a notorious womanizer. When he was in a long-term relationship, he was cheating with a black female singer (who was engaged). He also bragged about having sex with this same problem plagued singer-the night before her wedding. This serial cheater was also involved with a former model (sticky fingers). A few of his baby mama’s are threatening to take him to court for back child support but he doesn’t want his business in the streets, therefore he’s picking up any discreet job he can (behind the scenes) to pay them off to remain silent. Hint: Awesome from the neck down.

Actor: Quentin Tarantino
long-term relationship: Mira Sorvino
black female singer:
former model:

This actor (B list-movies, television) and actress (B list-television, model) have told everyone they are trying to have a baby and go see a doctor or fertility specialist, etc almost every week. What is really happening though is they are going to counseling almost every week because both are facing issues from past relationships they want to solve before marrying.
Jerry O'Connell and Rebecca Romijn

109. LAINEY GOSSIP 04/11
New Bitch Unwelcome: Gotta pay your dues in any industry…but especially in hers. However, it seems like the New Bitch doesn’t care for respecting the veterans in her business and so she is making enemies of almost everyone she works with and everyone who works with everyone she works with. For such a close knit community, this certainly doesn’t bode well, especially when the freshman glow starts to recede. But such foresight has escaped her and she’s burning bridges left right and centre, issuing demands normally reserved for bonafide legends in the business and treating the "workers" like they were born to serve her. During a recent tantrum, when she was given some professional advice, and instead of taking the criticism and learning from it, she waved her finger around, humiliating the person trying to help her, and tore him a new asshole: "I don’t need you to tell me what to do. I AM (this business) and I saved it too!" and then of course sulked for an hour and refused to work. And then there’s the insecurity. The minute another big name female gets brought up, the backstabbing begins. "Oh please… she is so fat next to me, she should just go home" or "Girl is gettin’ OLD! She should stop worrying about what I’m doing – it’s stressin’ her out!" Now as women…let’s face it… we are ALL catty. But the smart ones do it in a safe environment, with our girls, with those we trust. But the New Bitch’s ego is so out of control, she drops her insults everywhere, all the time, and she thinks she’s above repercussion. Dead Wrong. With the exception of her own team – and they’re milking her dry anyway – most people in the industry hate her with a passion. And while they would never intentionally bring her down, they will certainly make her feel unwelcome. So one day when she needs a friend, she may not have anyone to help. Hospitality is not an eternal river.

Jennifer Hudson/Patti LaBelle; Aretha Franklin (Jennifer landed her first professional role in a local production of BIG RIVER)
Charlotte Church/Shirley Bassey

--Beauty and the Breast: This perky and vivacious Beauty has gotten a taste of fame thanks to a certain TV show I know some of you love. She’s bubbly, she’s lively and she’s now...bouncy. According to insiders, Miss Beauty missed a recent public event on her doctor’s orders, because she’d just undergone breast-enlargement surgery, at her boyfriend’s suggestion. Let’s hear it for the boob tube!
Heidi Montag "The Hills"

--Body and the Beast: This actor, who stars in a TV show we’ve talked about here in WWK Central, has a Body so hot, he turns heads of both the female and male variety. So, naturally, he’d be a little, er, proud of his rippling assets. But a recent wave of gym incidents might prove Mr. Body has some kind of freakish obsession. During a five-day stint, separate friends of mine spotted Body at not one, not two but three different gyms in the L.A. area, taking off his shirt and flexing his pecks in front of the mirror, while glancing around to see who was watching. The "beast" of the situation, naturally, is that we all were not there!

111. TIME OUT NY 04/05-04/11 (Spring theater preview)
1. Which box-office magnet is much closer to his male assistant (now business partner) than his much-publicized wife?
Hugh Jackman

2. The cast of which Broadway show got its Irish up and basically boycotted the closing-week cast dinner thrown by its craven producers? "The Producers"

3. Which leading man was chided by producers when they learned that he had been swinging on Josh Strickland

4. Which artsy-fartsy institution's safe sked has earned it the derisive nickname "the International House of Shakespeare"? Public Theater "Shakespeare in the Park"

5. Which acclaimed experimental auteur has more enemies than friends for his tyrannical, womanizing ways? Don McKellar "The Drowsy Chaperone"

6. Angry at being told to speed up his performance, which stately thespian delivered that night's lines at a churlish breakneck pace? Christopher Plummer "Inherit the Wind"

112. NY DAILY NEWS 04/12
Which pop tart is attending basketball games, according to NBA gossip, owing to a crush on a player with a history of sexual assault accusations? Britney Spears/Lakers' Luke Walton

113. POPBITCH 04/12
--Which superstar DJ combo only has one technologically competent member? One does all the knob-twiddling in the studio while the other just puts his feet up. And consequently only gets 33% of the duo's royalties.
Basement Jaxx; Chemical Brothers

--This mum's favourite crooner has a reputationas a ladies man, but one male reader got rather friendly with him while cottaging in Sheffield bus station. The young chap asked, "You're taking a bit of a risk, aren't you? The Vegas star's reply? "Who the fuck would believe you if you told them?" Tony Christie as he's from Sheffield (or near enough) and recorded the song "Vegas"

You are a well known white actress but back in the day you were one of Heidi Fleiss’s top girls; one of her most profitable thoroughbreds. One of your top spending clients would later become your husband for a short time. Your hooker tricks (after dark) has your latest boyfriend sprung out of his mind. In Related News: Another one of Heidi girls appeared (small role) in the film “An Eye For An Eye,” years ago.
white actress: Denise Richards
husband: Charlie Sheen
latest boyfriend: Richie Sambora

This one should be fairly easy and will be public knowledge in the next day or two. So this reality couple has been having problems with their relationship but have tried to keep it from the cameras. They have been seeing a counselor and she thought everything was getting better. He sees the writing on the wall though and has been to see an attorney. (not me, wrong state)
Hulk Hogan and Linda Hogan

One Missed Missy Blind Vice: Oh, what a tangled web we weave when (repeatedly) we homos deceive. Guess what? I’ve got a same-sex Blind Vice comin’ atcha in...seconds! Such the surprise from moi, I know. There’s a very, very famous fruit in town. But, oh bro, is he evuh talented at making his myriad fans think he prefers the femmes. This Vice ain’t ‘bout the boy, though, it’s about the poor woman this guy utilized for his nefarious, i.e., press-release, purposes. Virginal Vamp is a doll—and I mean that in the least plastic way possible. V2’s the best at conjuring up sexy little do-me thoughts while wearing the cutest little proper lacy things in her flicks, which, for the most part, are always on the classy side. She’s the het man’s dream fantasy: somebody he can take home to mama but boff in the broom closet while the hors d’oeuvres are being fetched. Therefore, it was hardly a surprise when folks working for an infamous fruit who has often appeared in this very missive rang up V.V. for the most exciting role of her lifetime: to play said fagola’s real-life girlfriend! Done deal if she wanted, V. was told. Just call us back to seal the whispered doings, she was told eagerly. Virginal was so excited, she actually thought about it for...22 seconds. But, alas, Miz Vee was leaning against it and, just as she was about to ring back and probably decline to those who had parlayed the pooftah plan, word spread in electronic and old-fashioned scandal sheets alike. Seems another actress besides Virginal had decided to take the job (for her own desultory reasons). Count your blessings, Virg! ‘Cause the only thing worse than going out with a guy who does ya and then ignores ya is going out with a guy who doesn’t do ya and ignores ya! AND IT AIN’T: Anne Hathaway; Jessica Biel; Scarlett Johansson

very, very famous fruit: Jake Gyllenhaal
Virginal Vamp:
another actress: Reese Witherspoon

She knows she’s desirable therefore she doesn't have to think about it - because she knows she's hot! She’s also rich and she has male traits. She likes to love them and leave them, sometimes without explanation. Her latest plaything is bragging, ‘I have a dime piece.’ is boys are giving him props and he struts around, proud, with his chest stuck out. You may be saying nice things about her but behind your back, she’s telling her girls, ‘My Mandingo needs a penal implant.
Kimora Simmons/Djimon Hounsou

1. This A list actor with a foreign accent has a production company in the US. So he had several deductions for meals and such which are fine, but the restaurants were none the accountant had ever heard of which was really unusual. When he asked the actor about it, the actor said well they aren't really restaurants per se, they are more like social clubs where he could spend time alone with a lady or two or three, some drinks, and a bedroom. To make it easier they put restaurant in their name. There are 365 days in the year. Our actor went 114 times. Nice.
Hugh Grant

2. This former A list movie actress, now a possible B television queen spent almost $100K on her two dogs last year.

3. This reality show host has always been thought of as straight. Well the last four times he was spotted in public it was always with the same guy who is openly gay. Joe Rogan

119. 3 A.M. GIRLS 04/14
WHICH Brit actor is terrified that a sex-tape threesome that he filmed with an American starlet leaking on to the internet?
Jude Law/Lindsay Lohan

120. NY DAILY NEWS 04/15
Which R&B singer likes to drop ecstasy in the studio and fool around with his posse as if it doesn't count as gay because they're all taking drugs? Wonder if he knows there's security camera footage?
Ray J

This smooth R&B singer goes to great lengths to hide his homosexuality. When reporters and fans began to pry into his personal life, he has his rep contact a modeling agency to arrange a 'fake' date with a pretty woman, acting as a beard. This singer can barely control his attraction for men. He often stares at attractive men and he is very personable with men but he’s afraid to come out because it may ruin his female fan base. Hint: It’s not Maxwell. Usher; John Legend

122. NY POST 04/16
--Which divorced billionaire has his publicist double as a matchmaker? He has his rep seek out and then screen his dates to make sure everything's kosher.
Ron Perelman

--WHICH soon-to-be divorced billionaire is having a rough time splitting from his wife? He was recently seen leaving his psychiatrist's office in tears. Russell Simmons

--WHICH celebutard has a secret madam past? Not only is she not as rich as she wants people to think, but when she first popped up on the radar, she was making money on the side by offering to fill billionaires' boats with girls who would have sex for cash. Paris Hilton

At a party on Friday night, this B list young tv actor on one of those new networks was trying just a little too hard to show that he is straight. He took the girl he was with around the room introducing her to everyone as his girlfriend and how long they had been dating and where they were going after the party. He said the exact same thing to at least 40 people in the room while his "girlfriend" said absolutely nothing. She never even opened her mouth. Just had a plastic smile on her face to go with her plastic body.

This A-list actress would have you believe she's a modern woman, but she's old fashioned in one way: she doesn't want anyone to know she was a battered wife. She THOUGHT she was madly in love with her first husband but not long after they wed, she started cheating. He was suspicious and accused her and they had nasty fights. She hid her bruises from her family and friends. Finally he got PROOF of her indiscretion and the marriage imploded with one last pummeling. She feels guilty because she was a cheater and embarrassed because she endured the beatings, so she'll never talk about it.
Nicole Kidman/Tom Cruise

125. NY DAILY NEWS 04/17
Which handsome (and drunk) British leading man was recently reduced to hiding behind the coat rack at Soho House in London to evade a fellow guest who was trying to pick a fight?

126. PEREZ HILTON 04/17
Friends of what A-list diva are concerned about her recently converting to Scientology? Even though she's publicly denied this, sources close to the superstar confirm to that she converted. "She has slowly replaced (uncomfortably pushed out) most staff who was not into the religion," says a well-placed source. "Her long time housekeeper was so uncomfortable with the new 'workers' in the house, a.k.a. Scientology folk, that she was forced to leave." The picante diva has been shunning old friends as well and only surrounding herself with other Scientologists.
Jennifer Lopez

This former not very long ago A-list movie actress with a non-movie star husband has gone through four maids in the last four months. Their previous maid was with them for almost ten years and was with them all of the time. And when I say all of the time I mean all of the time. The only time she actually acted like a maid was when there were guests over who didn't know how close she was to the lady and gentleman of the house. Well, the maid grew older and so they decided to find a new one. No luck as each of the maids has been less than thrilled with the advances made not just by the husband, but by our actress as well. The agency sending the maids over knows what's happening, but just keeps sending new ones over for a tryout.
Bette Midler

128. NY DAILY NEWS 04/18
Which blond bombshell, on a recent visit to Rome, became ill and soiled her bedsheets so badly that the hotel mattress had to be replaced? "Also, she and [her boyfriend] have a reputation for really dirty sex," says a snitch.
Jessica Simpson/John Mayer

129. PANACHE REPORT 04/018
This rapper really does love his wife and has tried to remain faithful in his latest attempt to keep her permanently by his side but unfortunately, his boys are teasing him about it. Telling him, ‘you softened up, a real man has more than one woman, be the playa you were meant to be.’ Needless to say, our rapper has fallen off the wagon and is back to his old tricks. Sexing 2-3 women per night, having reps discreetly contact porn stars on his behalf and having raw dawg orgies with video girls/porn girls-with no end in sight. At the rate he’s going, it’s only a matter of time before he brings home a STD.
Snoop Dog

So, let's do two nasty little items that have one lovely little thing in common: Benjamins!

--Overpaid Olive: Olive is a fan favorite I'm sure you know. She's also the star of a certain TV series—and when I say "the star," I mean that her costars, apparently, are seen as mere afterthoughts. Sources tell me that while Olive has managed to pull in a pretty penny for her onscreen talents, her costars (who might be seen as equally valuable to fans) have raked in only one-tenth of Olive's fee. This has led not only to much on-set bickering but, more important, to a derailment of a project many of us fans desperately hoped would come to fruition. Sarah Jessica Parker "Sex and the City"

--Underpaid Underdog: Underpaid Underdog has all the makings of a bona fide celebrity. And he happens to star in a TV series we talk about often in this section. To the world, he might seem well on his way to becoming an A-lister, but when it comes to his paycheck, he's actually the bottom of the barrel. In fact, while the rest of his costars all make the same rate per episode, Underdog actually makes half that amount. So not fair for someone who might someday have his own Underdog Underoos! Masi Oka "Heroes"

So this B list television actress who just can't get enough publicity for herself called several companies about sponsoring her event ala Star Jones. As far as I know, each company contacted was happy to contribute something here and there and was really quite nice about the whole thing. That was not enough for our publicity hungry actress though. In addition to the freebies from all the companies she ALSO wanted them to pay her for the privilege of getting the stuff for free and even more money if she allowed their brands to be in the photos of her event. Needless to say, she doesn't have any sponsors now for her event.
Eva Longoria

132. Ausiello Report 04/18
Red-hot Mama Refuses to Act Her Age: To figure out who's the focus of this week's blind item, you won't just need bifocals, you'll need a time machine. Why? Because the diva in question hasn't been on the pop-culture radar since — oh, let's be generous — 1986. Yet behind the scenes at her eagerly anticipated new prestige series, she's behaving like she's as "now" as Sally Field. (She isn't.) See, even though the character that could turn her from a has-been to an is-again is a middle-aged matriarch, the sexpot is refusing to cop to the "middle" part, instead insisting that at almost (cough, cough) 50, she can still pass for 36. Since this means that her TV counterpart would have been, like, 10 when she started popping out kiddies, her revered exec producer is naturally pulling out his hair. So, guesses? And no, it isn't Mayim Bialik.
Rebecca De Mornay "John from Cincinnati"

133. NY DAILY NEWS 04/19
Which "American Idol" hottie was observed entering a bathroom stall with four guy friends at an L.A. nightspot Saturday night? Maybe they were having a meeting of the No Girls Allowed club.

--This reality TV Star is having a hard time dealing with the fact that her fifteen minutes of fame are up. She may have won the big prize on a reality TV show, but now she has to pose for nude photos and perform soft core porn to get attention.
Hoopz "Flavor of Love"

--This TV Personality is working hard on her TV comeback. She needs a steady gig. Her husband doesn’t work, and she likes to live large. She has undergone a tremendous makeover, and she needs a hit show. The last thing she needs right now is scandal. That’s why it’s so surprising that her husband can’t sit still. He loves to go out and roam the parks without her. Star Jones

--This female is beautiful, and she’s an accomplished Actress with numerous awards. She is one of Hollywood’s leading ladies and she has finally found love. Despite her good fortune, she continues to harp on the past and her abusive relationships. Sources say she loves playing the role of helpless victim. She is currently doing this as she promotes her latest movie. Halle Berry

--This Actor/Comedian has yet to strike it big. He has had marginal success, but he wants to be a superstar. He is so desperate for fame he is willing to risk his life for headlines. He was recently involved in a staged car crash that almost killed him. He figured if he did it, it would be great publicity for his new movie. Eddie Griffin

One Stalled Comeback Blind Vice: Thelma Turnip is looking rather like, well, a turnip these days. Hardly the secret, really, as T2's puss-ravaging lifestyle has left her cover-ready looks a little worse for the wear these past few years. Not even my Aunt Martha in Texas is surprised to see T.T. looking like a slightly younger version of Barbara Bush at myriad H-town events. But Thelma-doll's looks ain't exactly the point of this item—it's her career, which everyone from the fruit sprayer at Gelson's to CAA honchos is debating whether or not is salvageable. My guess? No way. Why? Because the top spinmeisters in town (ya know, the crowd that's known for darling little campaigns such as convincing the American public that Eddie Murphy is a "Good Samaritan" because he gave a peeyem ride to a transvestite) are turning down T.T. right 'n' leery left. Jeez, that says somethin', I'm tellin' ya. "She's not ready," one of T-town's premier Machiavellian types told me after she had been asked to raise Ms. Turnip's chances for a professional resurgence. When pressed, the wizard at reinventing fallen entertainment idols told me Ms. Turnip is still—you guessed it—not exactly cleaned up, as everyone currently thinks. Hey, I used to be addicted to that crap, I know how tough it is—good luck, Thelma! We're prayin' for ya, you gonzo g-friend! AND IT AIN’T: Courtney Love; Heather Locklear; Sarah Ferguson
Whitney Houston

What supposedly happily married mogul is said to be making a play for the boyfriend of a major Hollywood agent?

As we reported earlier in the week, we had no idea that the following celebrity is bi-sexual. Our source gave us the following information that led to her transformation. This black female celebrity was involved with a married powerbroker, she broke up with him to be with another man, who may or may not be very popular. The powerbroker reacted by slapping her, spitting in her face and slamming her against a wall. Her new boyfriend introduced her to ménage a trios, at first she was disgusted by the suggestion but he persuaded her to try it. She surprised herself by liking the experience. After a few months, she started requesting that a female join them in bed-permanently. After a few encounters, she started ignoring her boyfriend to pay attention to the female. This began to cause tension in their relationship. Recently, she was on the guest list to a private East Coast lesbian party. A copy of the invitation was given to us by a source. Other guests included two hip-hop lesbians and one bi-sexual female rapper as well as downlow lesbians in acting and singing.

black female celebrity: Chili
married powerbroker: LA Reid
new boyfriend who MAY be famous: Usher
Other guests:
2 hip-hop lesbians: MC Lyte, Missy Elliot
1 bisexual female rapper: Da Brat
Down low lesbians in acting/singing: Queen Latifah

1. This C list television actress on a hit network show tells one of her boyfriends she still lives at home which is why she can't spend the night. She does live at home, BUT actually she is staying over each night at her male co-star's house instead. At least when his wife isn't home.
Hayden Panettiere/Adrian Pasdar "Heroes"

2. This former A list television star from the early 90's hasn't done much lately but still seems to have all his cash. Is he a spendthrift or does he make his money selling drugs when he visits friends at studios all over town? Jeremy London

3. This celebutante/barely a celebrity just moved to LA and has already put the word out that she wants to do a reality show with her boyfriend. Ummm. You might want to tell him first because he doesn't want anything to do with reality television. Vanessa Minnillo/Nick Lachey

4. This A list aging movie actor keeps buying the lots next to his home as they become available. So far the total is four. He doesn't need the room, but his goal is to have the largest house in LA to show he is still the King. Jack Nicholson

139. NY POST 04/22
--WHICH wife of a radio personality is so paranoid and stingy, she padlocks the fridge to keep the help from stealing food
. Deidre Imus

--WHICH handsome bisexual married man has been spotted picking up guys at gay clubs to "spice up" what he calls his "six-year relationship" with another man? David Beckham; Al Reyonlds (Star Jones' husband)

140. NY DAILY NEWS 04/22
Which hunky Brit actor has a tattoo of a star on his arm that some liken to the tattoos heroin users have to mark their vein?
Jonathan Rhys Meyers

141. POPBITCH 04/22
(this appeared on their website, then disappeared, so take it for what it’s worth)
--Which detective on a hot CBS show is an egomaniacal prick who harasses women on the show and made this stupid joke to a male crew member? "You're a conch shell kind of guy." Many years ago he owed his big break to the Nazi Holocaust. The "conch incident" happened last December.
James Woods

--Which former soap opera hunk, now expecting his first child with his second wife, was rumored to have a gay relationship with Jann Wenner in the early 1990s? They shared an interest in motorcycles. Whether that's true or not, it's a fact that the hunk called Mr. Wenner as soon as he (the hunk) heard the news of the terrorist attacks on September 11. (I saw the hunk's records from AT & T Wireless in 2001. He was far away from New York at the time, but Mr. Wenner was there. I don't know whether they have been in contact during his wife's pregnancy, nor have I seen phone records from the early 1990s that could verify the gay story from that era.) Jason Priestley

--Which sixty-something star of the 1960s rock counter-culture never has had a substance problem, yet he is in love with the sound of his own voice? Still an occasional performer, the star thinks he is doing his much - younger manager a favor by tagging along on the manager's restaurant dates with women. Between the waiters' questions, the star tells a story he has told hundreds of times on rock & roll nostalgia radio and TV interviews. It's the story of how he first met his musical collaborator back in the day when Los Angeles people made friends on the beach. The star launches into this story to the chagrin of his manager's potential bed partners, even though nobody has asked him to tell it. The star's wife -- amazingly his first and only wife -- is wise enough to eat at home. Ray Manzarek, born in 1939, the much-younger manager's name is Jeff Jampol AKA Jeffrey

--What seventy-something legendary movie star, who lends her name to New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson's efforts to bring filmmaking to that state, is nasty and rude to almost everyone? The bitchy attitude she uses with people who can scout filming locations near the adobe architecture hardly helps their efforts. And New Mexico could use the film business to provide jobs to the poor. Several Albuquerque software companies have laid people off in recent years, and the Santa Fe art market always caters to the wealthy. Way to go, bitch !

142. NY DAILY NEWS 04/23
Which young actor, currently hyping a film, has been looking cozy with a beautiful, married TV actress? They were spotted twice together in NYC last week. Wonder what her wealthy husband thinks about that.
Adam Brody/Olivia Wilde

*Rewind: We did a blind item last year on two black actresses, one of them being Halle Berry. Another black actress in Hollywood continues to be insanely jealous over Berry’s success and reportedly did everything in her power to try and sabotage her but all of her attempts failed because Berry is too powerful. Update: Now, we have a similar situation with two black female singers, one of them being Beyonce. Despite Beyonce being talented, beautiful and friendly, she has a colleague who is extremely jealous of her success. "Up until recently," this woman tried to spread false rumors on Bey and she tried to plant scandalous stories in the tabloids and she’s the same person who is referred to as a source when bloggers post negative false stories on Beyonce. Hint: The jealous singer had a few big hits but has fallen off considerably.
Jealous black actress: Angela Bassett; Lela Rochon
Jealous black singer:
"Destiny's Child" Letoya Luckett

This one you may have to read once or twice, but it's pretty easy. At a certain party this weekend, everyone thought bf/gf would pair off. The tabs said that gf paired off with another guy not her bf but they were also wrong. Turns out gf had her eyes set on the rich guy in the corner who she thought would be just right. She gave it her very best effort, but was turned down not because she did anything wrong, but because the rich guy in the corner wanted her bf. The gf thought that would be fun and made the proposition to her bf. He freaked out and she was pissed off. No one ended up with anyone. Which really might not be a bad thing.
Paris Hilton (Josh Henderson/Jason Strauss)

145. NY DAILY NEWS 04/24
Which fatphobic supermodel paid for her PR rep's liposuction as a "present"?

So this A list film actor is currently filming on location. Did I mention he is married? So our actor has two trailers on the set. One of them is the "public" trailer, which his wife and friends of his wife get to see when they visit. The other trailer is not so public. The other trailer is basically porn central. From the PC full of porn to the DVDs, this actor definitely has a thing for it. No, I'm not going to say something like gay porn. It's straight porn. Umm, there is one thing, though. He likes porn stars to come visit so he can feel like he is a porn star. They reenact some of his favorite scenes in which the visiting porn actress starred. It certainly makes his days much more interesting than everyone else's on set.
Sean Penn

147. NY DAILY NEWS 04/25
Which married bad-boy Oscar winner has a bit on the side with an early-20s NYC Latina beauty, said to resemble Beyonce?
Sean Penn

This pretty actress looks like the girl next door and has a juicy role on a hit cable series. She's well liked in the business and her career is taking off. But she can't hold onto a boyfriend because of her nasty secret. It seems they object to her addiction to Vicodin. They don't like the sleazy drug dealers that come to her house, and they worry about what it's doing to her health. She's been hooked for years and isn't interested in rehab. Her last boyfriend (who REALLY loved her) gave her an ultimatum: "It's me or the drug." She chose the drug, as usual.

A great buzz was generated before this rapper released his album, so much so, that he purchased numerous luxury items (including bling) on credit, anticipating a huge cash flow. Although the album had strong sales it’s first week, it fell off the charts within the next few weeks due to illegal downloading. Now, this rapper is in debt with jewelers, casinos and creditors. It’s doubtful that he can recover because he alienates the people who can help him: Promoters, agents and the fans who buy his music. It seems as if he has an intense hatred for his fans, he’s been in numerous unreported altercations with fans who simply ask for his autograph. He or his bodyguard-either curse out fans, push them aside roughly or threaten them with their lives.
Busta Rhymes

This openly gay female singer is going just a little nuts. At a recent visit to an office superstore, she dragged her assistant?/lover? with her and went down EACH row and asked if they needed this and that. Not just one item in a row, but literally almost every item in every row. If the assistant/lover said no, she had to back it up with reasons why they didn't need it. Not Melissa E.
kd Lang

151. NY DAILY NEWS 04/26
Which chick-lit author was so hung over after a Saturday night on the town that she vomited into her jacket sleeve at church the next day?
Terry McMillan; Candace Bushnell

152. LAINEY’S GOSSIP 04/26
What of the superstar who claims no vices? Who claims transcendence over addiction thanks to studied enlightenment and almost supernatural self control? Husband, hero, healer…What would his followers thing of his other closeted habit? Methol ciggies supposedly sucked back like a fiend behind closed doors - yet another secret on top of all the others. Or is it that the one super suppressed secret is spawning the others? Is it the keeping of the Big Secret that compels him to cope by secretly smoking? Is smoking a big deal? Of course not. But for someone whose image is largely based on selling perfection, whose status is said to render him immune to addiction, who can in fact assist in overcoming it – smoking is indeed a bit hypocritical, though by comparison to his other fraud, I suppose it’s all relative. Tom Cruise (Big Secret = gay)

153. POPBITCH 04/26
--Soft rock bands in the 80s did everything big: hair, choruses, cocaine. The lead singer of one famous power ballad combo so annoyed his gak dealer with the frequency of his calls that one day the dealer made the singer leave his house and then spent the afternoon hiding dozens of grams around the house. He told the vocalist that when he just couldn't fight that feeling any more he could call and the dealer would give him directions to where one of the bags was hidden.
Kevin Cronin/REO Speedwagon

--Which London fashion designer was arrested with two other men while getting up to some funny business in the men's toilets of a top London department store? They were handcuffed and taken to the police station, but kept their liberty when the police declined to do the store manager's bidding and press charges. It turns out that placing hidden cameras in public restrooms is WAY more illegal than any amount of three-way cubicle man-love. Matthew Williamson

So I've been thinking of eyebrows a bunch this week and you will see why tomorrow. When I mentioned eyebrows at work yesterday, someone related this to me. This A list actor was dating someone a few years ago. His girlfriend said that his eyebrows were overgrown and took him to a salon. He agreed to have his brows waxed. Well, our actor didn't like the result at all. So he shaved them completely off. The problem was that he was scheduled to start filming in two days. During the film in which he won an Academy Award, he sports the following looks:
1. Eyebrows colored in with magic marker.
2. Fake eyebrows in one color.
3. Fake eyebrows in a different color.
4. His barely there own eyebrows towards the end of filming.

Jamie Foxx

She is the most powerful woman in Television. She is currently involved in a major Broadway production. The show is a success, and she scored a major coup when she hired a reality TV Star to join the cast. At first, she was thrilled with her choice. Then, she discovered her young protégé loves acting like a hoochie. When photos came out showing the young protégé in provocative poses, she tried to talk to her about acting like a lady. But, the young protégé says she has to be true to herself. She loves dressing flashy and showing her behind.
most powerful woman: Oprah Winfrey
young protégé: Fantasia Barrino

Here I go again: another damn Vice ‘bout yet another limp-wristed Hollywood hubby. And I use the antigay terminology only because it’s deserved in this sitch. Fey Ray had it all. Beautiful woman. Gorgeous friends, hangers-on and so forth—all the accompanying high-life accoutrements that strangely just seem to come to heterosexual couples playing house, so rarely the gay ones, save Ellen ‘n’ Portia. Fey-stud also had such nice teeth (I know, I have a thing with sparkling molars and incisors, so please forgive me). But he also had a penchant for little boys—nothing underage, mind you—something his gal was actually okay with! Still. It wasn’t enough. A once-in-a-while little fagola fling (even with his baby’s blessings) just wasn’t enough for F.R., so he just had to go and bust things up with his gorgeous honey, so stupid-ola. I say dumbo time ‘cause Fey actually is one of those rare creatures who is bisexual. So many folks say they are just to get more headlines (or cash). Why does Anne Heche come to mind right about now? Never mind, back to Fey. So, Mr. R. had a regular dude on the side. F.R.’s gal knew all along—and she still tried to keep the relationship going okay between her and her man (what some women will put up with!). Didn’t work. Fey needed his tumescent nooky time too much. But get this: As soon as Fey busted up with his gal, he also busted up with his guy. Didn’t want people thinking he was gay, or anything. Oy vey. I think my straight girlfriends are correct: Men—and not just the hetero ones—are dumber than Tom Cruise in love. AND IT AIN’T: Adam Brody, George Bush, James Blunt
Dave Navarro; Ryan Philippe

157. NY DAILY NEWS 04/27
Heads up to that hunky actor who's had so many famous girlfriends. The New York paparazzi are gunning for a picture of you and that male model with whom you're joined at the hip (or wherever).
Jake Gyllenhaal

1. So this A list movie actress (and I really use the term loosely here because to me being in the tabs often doesn't make you A list, but some people think so) who is always at the top of every sexy list has been going through more heartbreak then was previously imagined. Although people spoke of her breakup, it was just a casual thing for the most part. Not for our actress. She was absolutely crushed and it shows. She has been dropping weight rapidly and has become sickly looking just in the past two or three weeks. Not drugs, not disease, just heartbreak. (Not Jessica Biel)
Jessica Alba

2. So, this person you either love or hate was all set to do an exclusive party in the Land Down Under. Big bucks were coming his way. So, what he decided to do was go ahead and double book two parties, even though he had promised both of them exclusivity. He thought the two hosts would agree to something and he would get two fees. Well, neither host would budge and both were irate. Finally one had enough and just said you can have him. Except for a little nudge from someone, our person could have ended up with no parties and is very lucky to still have one. Perez Hilton

3. This B list film actress just completed a round of publicity for one of her recent films. When she was looking at the photos of herself she decided she didn't like what she saw. Even though she's incredibly young she decided to have a face lift. Now, she can't stop smiling. No, I mean the skin is so tight now that it is really uncomfortable unless she is smiling all of the time. This is someone who never smiled. What makes it worse is that she is going around telling everyone that she has never had any work done. Uh-huh. Christine Ricci

4. So Wednesday was Administrative Professionals Day. I don't think they changed it from Secretary Day to be PC. I think it was done so it would include more people and make the lunch crowds rival Mother's Day. Anyway, last year at lunch, I needed to use the facilities. I'm old and have prostate problems. As I was waiting in line, (see what I mean about crowds), I noticed an actor brother who was not even shy about his need to look over the dividing line to both his right and left to see what the other men were bringing to the table so to speak. Lest you doubt his intentions, our actor is just a bit vertically challenged and had to stand on tip toes to achieve this feat. He managed to make it through about three cycles of men before fleeing. He must also have a bad prostate because he was headed back to the bathroom 15 minutes later. Chad Lowe

159. NY POST 04/29
--WHICH handsome former boyfriend of a boy-bander has a new, secret fling? While the hunk is out, his new man - a famously single actor - is not. Reichen Lehmkuhl/Kevin Spacey

--WHICH studio biggie is in danger of losing his job and his wife? His bosses are unhappy with recent flops and his spouse just found out he's been having an affair with a female underling.

--WHICH young British actress had a bad reaction to her makeup and broke out in pimples while filming a big-budget costume epic? The special-effects geeks had to remove her spots with their computers. Keira Knightley

160. NY DAILY NEWS 04/29
Which aging, international figurehead for the bachelor lifestyle needs a daily injection in his butt to combat everything he has picked up from decades of free living?
Hugh Hefner

161. Grazia Issue 113 04/30
1. * Which Brit actor now enjoying life down under needs to be more conservative with his lifestyle? This pretty TV poppet looks like butter wouldn't melt, but the boys he's been partying with aren't discreet. They have lots to say about his love of crystal meth. Adam Ricketts

2. This transatlantic party girl is trying her luck in London because she's annoyed so many people in LA. Club promoters & drug dealers got sick of her attitude & unwillingness to pay her bills. The rich imbeciles in her circle should make sure everything turns out ok. Mischa Barton

3. This comedy star's CV is a touch hit & miss. Still, it seems that his taste in films is pretty eclectic. He turned up on set at a mate's porn movie, downed a number of beers & proceeded to loudly & enthusiastically cheer on all the men getting down & dirty on screen. Charlie Sheen

4. Their albums are hugely popular here, but this US band aren't as rich as they could be. They're moaning that they signed a bad deal, but label insiders claim its more to do with the fact that, for most of their career they've had about as much input onto their records as the average boy band. Even their live music has mainly been performed by their producers & backing musicians. Scissor Sisters, Kings of Leon

162. NY DAILY NEWS 04/30
Which young TV heroine was recently overheard calling paparazzi outside a Beverly Hills spa to tip them off that she would soon be leaving?
Hayden Panettiere

163. BILLY MASTERS 04/30
Could it be that the publicist for a certain small-screen star has been working overtime? That in itself wouldn't be surprising given his client's track record. But this mouthpiece was able to get a police record not only suppressed, but expunged. A sizeable donation to the right people did the trick. Remember: the more you party with paramours who charge by the hour, the more chance you have of "dating" an undercover cop!
Charlie Sheen

164. PEREZ HILTON 04/30
What recently rehabbed hard-pAArtying starlet was seen drinking up a storm at the Coachella Music Festival this past weekend, several sources tell And, no, it wasn't Red Bull or water!!!
Lindsay Lohan

Have you ever noticed the third of this trio of actresses is usually not around the other two. Nothing against her. She is nice enough even though she doesn't seem to really fit in with them. It seems the biggest problem is they just don't like her guy and he is always around. Seems that her guy has hit on the other two often. Very often. Doesn't matter if they have a boyfriend or not, he hits on them. No matter how many times he is rejected, he just keeps plugging away. They have quietly approached the third, but she always sticks up for her guy and says they probably just misunderstood his friendliness.
Lisa Kudrow

This black actress is known for her looks rather than her acting skills and she is not really known outside of the black community. In the past, she had been in abusive relationships. After the last abusive relationship ended, she made a decision. She would no longer date abusive, broke men. Now, she discreetly dates multi-millionaires, and she was once linked with an overseas white billionaire. She goes out of her way to keep her personal business private and out of the black gossip columns. Before she started dating rich men, she didn’t have much in the bank and wasn’t financial savvy. Now, she is set up with stocks and annuities valued at close to seven figures. That’s why you never heard of her going broke despite not having a regular acting gig in several years and everybody knows how hard it is for black actresses in Hollywood yet she always has money. Hint: It’s not Michael Michelle, Lisa Bonet or Halle Berry.

This R&B Soul Legend has seen better singing days. His career is ending as he deals with his legal issues. He puts on a brave front for the public, but his young family will have to fend for themselves while he pays his dues to society. His recent tour will probably be his last. Audience members were in shock when they realized he was lip singing his entire set. The Singer complained of not feeling well, but the truth is his singing voice left him years ago. His health is failing (stroke, kidney cancer, stress), and it shows.
Isley Brothers frontman Ronald "Mr. Biggs" Isley

Last updated: May 14, 2018